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McCain Campaign Co-Chair: 'Guy of the Street' Obama Should 'Come Clean' About Past Drug Use

By Michael D. Shear
Former Oklahoma governor Frank Keating, a co-chair of Sen. John McCain's campaign, called Sen. Barack Obama "very extreme" on a radio show Thursday and raised the issue of Obama's drug use.

"He ought to admit, 'You know, I've got to be honest with you. I was a guy of the street'," Keating said. "'I was way to the left. I used cocaine. I voted liberally, but I'm back at the center.'"

Keating made the comments on the radio show of comedian Dennis Miller.

Miller, a conservative, offered a long critique of Obama, calling him "the most liberal guy" and saying that the "obfuscation" and "smoke and mirrors" surrounding his campaign were "Clintonesque."

"He's starting to treat me like an idiot, too, when he's blowing this smoke my way," Miller said. "He ought to just come clean and say, 'Listen, I came up through Chicago. You make some errors there.' I'd almost be able to absolve it more easily then."

Miller did correct Keating on the accusation of Obama hiding his drug use.

"Wait, I've got to jump in Frank. He has copped to the blow use, right?" Miller said, referring to Obama's admission of cocaine use in his autobiography. "I mean, he did so in his own book he said he did blow."

"Oh yes, he did," Keating said.

In 1999, Keating was quick to weigh in on rumors about George W. Bush's alleged drug use as a young man. The former FBI agent did himself some real damage with the Bush campaign when he told an interviewer that Bush should answer questions "about private conduct."

By Web Politics Editor  |  October 9, 2008; 7:03 PM ET
Categories:  B_Blog , Barack Obama , John McCain  
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Next: Obama Buys Primetime Slots on CBS and NBC


Funny how Frank Keating never mentioned that Obama was editor of the Harvard Law Review.

Posted by: manifoldcuriosity | October 12, 2008 3:40 AM | Report abuse

I'm sorry, I thought Obama was an elitist. Now he's a street guy? Make up your minds, Rethuglicans, you can't even figure out how you're going to slime your opponent.

And while we're on drugs. Care for any pain killers, Cindy?

Posted by: DeboG | October 10, 2008 11:38 AM | Report abuse

Thanks, wes, I could not find that anywhere last night. As for JRM2's question, smoking and excessive drinking is not good for anyone. I've got a full day's patient load, so maybe we can discuss more on Monday.

Posted by: MarkInAustin | October 10, 2008 11:26 AM | Report abuse

I am sure this fellow wouldn't have to look far in his skeleton closet to find his drug use - so why don't you come clean racist fool.

Furthermore, it's about the economy, stupid !

It's so obvious that their campaign is in the toilet. But I have some words for you:

If they want to focus your attention and energy in this direction, if you had rather "turn the page on the economy," then I hope ALL of the American people will completely reject you and yours !

No weapon forged against you [ Barack Obama] will prevail, and you [ Barack Obama] will refute every tongue that accuses you [ Barack Obama] . This is the heritage of the servants [ Barack Obama] of the LORD, and this is their [ Barack Obama] vindication from me," declares the LORD. - Isaiah 54:17

" I [ God ] will send my terror ahead of you [ Barack Obama] and throw into confusion every nation you [ Barack Obama] encounter. I [ God ] will make all your [ Barack Obama] enemies turn their backs and run." - Exodus 23:27

The Lord will rescue me [ Barack Obama] from every evil attack and will bring me [ Barack Obama] safely to his heavenly kingdom. - 2 Timothy 4:18

11 For he will command his angels concerning you [ Barack Obama] to guard you [ Barack Obama ] in all your ways; 12 they will lift you [ Barack Obama ] up in their hands, so that you [ Barack Obama ] will not strike your [his] foot against a stone. 13 You [ Barack Obama ] will tread upon the lion and the cobra; you [ Barack Obama ] will trample the great lion and the serpent. - Psalm 91:11-13

I have given you [ Barack Obama ] authority to trample on snakes and scorpions and to overcome all the power of the enemy; nothing will harm you [ Barack Obama ]. - Luke 10:19

It's time for the American people to get it right and NOT vote for McCain-Palin, instead vote for change. It's time for this country to turn the page and seek a new and better future for ourselves and our children.It's time for REAL change in Washington, it's time to elect Barack Obama for president !

Obama-Biden are the wiser and stronger team to solve the crucial challenges we have in this nation and abroad !


Posted by: Obama44thpres | October 10, 2008 10:23 AM | Report abuse

Senator John McCain, as chairman of the Indian Affairs Committee, at a hearing in 2005 to examine accusations of misconduct made by six Indian tribes against their former lobbyist, Jack Abramoff.
Mr. McCain supported tax breaks for casinos over the years, including one that helped Foxwoods in Connecticut. He has also gambled there.

A lifelong gambler, Mr. McCain takes risks, both on and off the craps table. He was throwing dice that night not long after his failed 2000 presidential bid, in which he was skewered by the Republican Party’s evangelical base, opponents of gambling. Mr. McCain was betting at a casino he oversaw as a member of the Senate Indian Affairs Committee, and he was doing so with the lobbyist who represents that casino, according to three associates of Mr. McCain.

The visit had been arranged by the lobbyist, Scott Reed, who works for the Mashantucket Pequot, a tribe that has contributed heavily to Mr. McCain’s campaigns and built Foxwoods into the world’s second-largest casino. Joining them was Rick Davis, Mr. McCain’s current campaign manager. Their night of good fortune epitomized not just Mr. McCain’s affection for gambling, but also the close relationship he has built with the gambling industry and its lobbyists during his 25-year career in Congress.

Mob Connections is Arizona
the car-bomb murder of a top reporter at the Arizona Republic named Don Bolles.

Jerome Corsi...remember him...wrote a BOOk on this...

The father of McCain's wife, James Hensley, was convicted by a federal jury in U.S. District Court of Arizona in March 1948 on seven counts of filing false liquor records.

Hensley also was charged with conspiracy to hide from federal authorities the names of persons involved in a liquor industry racket with two companies he managed, United Sales Company in Phoenix and United Distributors in Tucson.

The umbrella company, United Liquor, at that time held a monopoly in Arizona, organized and managed by Kemper Marley, who was accused of mob ties by a reporter who was murdered in 1977.

Silverman and Dougherty report that by 1955, Hensley had launched a Budweiser distributorship in Phoenix, "a franchise reportedly bestowed upon him by Marley, who was never indicted in the 1948 liquor-law-violation case – or a subsequent one – despite his controlling role in the liquor distribution businesses."

According to Marley's longtime public relations man, Al Lizanetz, the Marley liquor empire was founded by the Bronfman family dynasty of Canada which operated Allied Finance Company, Northern Export Company and Distillers Corporation – the Seagrams, Ltd. empire.

As chronicled by the "Rumrunners and Prohibition" video shown popularly on the History Channel, during the 1920s, the Bronfman family made millions in bootlegging, accounting for half the illegal liquor crossing the border, working in a profitable distribution deal with the infamous mobster Meyer Lansky, who later moved on to establish the crime syndicates in the casinos of Havana, Cuba, in the 1940s and 50s.

Arizona in the 1970s drew a "who's who" of organized crime figures seeking to retire in the sun, including Rochester, N.Y., mob boss Joe Bonanno, who spent his last days along the Lake Havasu shores and in a quiet home in Tucson.

In 1977, after Arizona Republic reporter Don Bolles was killed when his car was blown up by the mob in a parking lot, a team of 36 journalists from 27 news organizations, known as IRE, published an 80,000 word 23-part series on organized crime in Arizona.

Dan Nowicki and Bill Muller, reporting in the Arizona Republic March 1, 2007, documented that in 1953, Hensley was again charged with falsifying records at Marley's liquor firms.

Hensley was found not guilty after being defended by William Rehnquist, the future chief justice of the Supreme Court, Nowicki and Muller wrote.

Ms Marylin Shannon
and her ultra far right Oregon's Citizens Alliance.

"He spoke at their convention and had kind words for an anti-abortionist activist who is a member who shot a doctor in both arms and bombed abortion clinics in Kansas.

He stated "She's a fine lady".

Looks like McCain has been on drugs for over 50 years......

Posted by: AlexP1 | October 10, 2008 8:31 AM | Report abuse

Terrorist didn't work so let's try drug addict. The Republicans are obviously trying to throw everything at the wall to see if anything will stick. With our country falling apart before our eyes it's a sad, sad, way to run a campaign. They have nothing left folks.

Posted by: bretb | October 10, 2008 7:26 AM | Report abuse

Obama graduated Harvard Magna Cum Laude, their second highest honor.
Forsaking high salary, he worked for the poor in Chicago before running for public office.

McCain was a Annapolis reject saved by his father's connections. He was a terrible pilot, crashing three times. During his imprisonment after being shot down (or crashed) he collaborated with the enemy.

After returning home, he divorced his wife (who had waited for him) because she was crippled in an auto accident. McCain immediately married Cindy.

Using his father's connections again, McCain entered politics. He was involved in another financial scandal in the eighties with a banker called Keating who gave him bribes.

He has voted against aid to war veterans many times including Iraq war veterans.
He now says he will freeze all spending except for defense and a few key programs.

Don't get frozen out by McCain. He doesn't care about veterans and he doesn't care about you.

Posted by: seemstome | October 10, 2008 7:08 AM | Report abuse


Hope is all we've got left.

The middle/upper middle class working folks who put together a disciplined plan of investment (in lieu of savings) are about to get their statements from the mutual funds they invested in over the past 5 years.

They're about to find out that their money is gone.

This can't be good news for McCain or Republicans who told them to invest in the Stock Market for retirement.

Posted by: JohnQuimby | October 10, 2008 2:55 AM | Report abuse

Whats going to be interesting is Mccain bringing up Ayers, Rev. Wright during a general election debate. Mccain promised his fellow prisoners that he would. Thats what happen when you rally your supporters around hate instead of hope and substance. Now Mccain has to take all that anger exposed by his supporters into a Debate Hall on a National Stage and make a complete fool of himself when they hear the hatred, and divisiveness when our country is at war and facing an economic crisis. I bet people at home watching would be saying has Mccain lost his mind? I guess hope isn't such a bad or naive word after all.

Posted by: amosdefnails | October 10, 2008 2:38 AM | Report abuse if the nation gives an iota about these infantile, transparent ploys of the McCain campaign to change the subject when the DOW is dropping 200-500 points a day!

...let them fiddle with their outmoded and condescending attempts to distract us while the economy continues to burn to the ground! See what good it does them.

They just look all the more ridiculous as our shared economic ruin becomes more catastrophic each day.

Posted by: ann_shannon | October 10, 2008 2:32 AM | Report abuse

I think Mccain/Palin bit off more than they can chew rallying up the radical right. Its starting to back Mccain away snubbing questions from his fellow prisoners. Mccain hasn't been that far to the right because he's really not a conservative. It looks like Mccain is getting beat up by his fellow prisoners for not defeating Obama. What do they want him to do? Give the old man a break. He's 72 years old, had cancer 4 times, his VP can't hold her own during the easiest interviews, she doesn't have a clue on a majority of issues so she can't help him. We'll Mccain trapped himself once again. Thats what happens when your "OUT OF TOUCH, OUT OF IDEAS, AND OUT OF TIME."

Posted by: amosdefnails | October 10, 2008 2:29 AM | Report abuse

Obama said, "Yeah, I inhaled, that was the point."

That's pretty straightforward.

Dennis Miller once said, (about Bill Clinton) "Remember the guys who wouldn't inhale? Would you want one of them to be president?"

Posted by: JohnQuimby | October 10, 2008 1:56 AM | Report abuse

I can't believe the Washington Post is giving this story legs. This is ridiculous.

Posted by: amosdefnails | October 10, 2008 1:39 AM | Report abuse

Me thinks its McShame that should come clean about how he divorced his cripped ex-wife to marry Cyndi.
Its Palin that should come clean about the reasons for parading her disgraceful pregnant 17yr old daughter Bristol withgout any sense of shame.
Fact check- its too late to save Mcshame!!!

Posted by: roberta2 | October 10, 2008 1:05 AM | Report abuse

I wonder if Frank Keating is related to the criminal Keating Five with Macshame?

Posted by: waawaazaire | October 10, 2008 12:58 AM | Report abuse

Why doesn't McCain buy advertising time and explain his policies with charts and graphs, PowerPoint style since everyone uses it nowadays, and tell America why he is the best choice for President?

A detailed explanation of his policies would appeal greatly to swing voters and allow him to get his message directly to the American voting public without the "filter" of the media or debate moderators.

Based on the Obama campaign's announcement this evening, that is his plan.

I believe the cost for Obama's buy was $1 Million. Surely McCain has that much in his war chest.

Tell us why we should vote FOR McCain, not AGAINST Obama.

The "vote against" strategy hasn't worked well in recent years as evidence by John Kerry in '04 and it won't work again this year.

Posted by: flyfishchef | October 10, 2008 12:44 AM | Report abuse


From "fact of the matter"

..."My friends you ask these questions and all you get is a barrage of insults." THE INSULT IS THE LIE THAT MCCAIN IS PORTRAYING...The insult is having a following of RACIST HATEMONGERS....The insult is the insidious RACEBAITING WHICH THIS crude HONORLESS man who has stood up to offend our AMERICAN INTELLIGENCE AND IN THE MIDST OF A FINANCIAL WORLD CRISIS...all McCain is offering is RACIST FEAR-BAITING.



McCain was silent giving a full voice to DANGEROUS THREATS OF ASSASSINATION. Where is his leadership on this? If any harm comes to Senator Obama, we need to remember that Senator John McCain CONDONED IT BY GIVING IT A VOICE, Sean Hannity, CONDONED IT by allowing an ani-smetic terrorist on his show and then allowing McCain and Palin own his show to give a voice too, TWO POLITICIANS WHO ARE EVEN SUPPORTED BY SO-CALLED CHRISTIAN ORGANIZATIONS, AND THEY THEMSELVES PROFESS CHRIST, and they came on FOX NEWS accussing a fellow American Senator of being a TERROIST, EVEN INCITING the use of his African middle name to stir up RACIST HATRED on National TV. We need to remember that FOX NEWS has given RACISM, AND ANTI-SEMITISM A VOICE THROUGH Sean Hannity's show.....If anything atrocious happens to Senator Obama THESE PEOPLE AND ENTITIES NEED TO BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE.


Where are we as a nation when in our politics this type of behaviour is accepted? Talked about on the news as if they were speaking about baseball and not our very lives, and what we stand for? Notice this, no one contends with the fact that John McCain and Sarah Palin and The RNC, and the NRA, and Fox News and Rush Limbaugh, Sean Hannity, and a Police officer From Florida and two RNC statechairmans have PUBLICLY AND LOUDLY EVOKED RACIST SENTIMENTS OF HATRED AND MURDER and have tied it into WHAT WOULD BE CALLED PATRIOTISM.

I say this with no fear at all of being judged by a TRUE ALTRUISTIC CREATOR, who presides over us all....John McCain, Sarah Palin, Sean Hannity, and other dishonorable people like these who say Christ is their GOD and behave contrary to Christ are LIARS....Christ is not as Evil is. To go forth in the name of Christ yet LIE ON YOUR BROTHER, is EVIL AND WICKED!!!

To go forth in the Name of Christ and ACCUSE YOUR BROTHER FALSELY and attempt to raise questions which would CAUSE THREATS ARE EVEN HARM to his life should be evidence enough to anyone who is of Christ of something EVIL USING YOU.

Senator McCain and Governor Palin, and Senator Obama and his wife Michelle all understand in their inner being, that these aren't honest inquiries raised out of LOVE and CONCERN. McCain and Palin should be publicy shamed. Barack and Michelle should continue to walk wisely yet be very cautious and PRAY.

If it is not of TRUE LOVE AND CONCERN then it is the OPPOSITE, HATRED, and SCORN. This strategy that Senator McCain and Governor Palin have aligned themselves with is EVIL IN THE VERY CORE OF IT'S MOTIVE. It is an ANYTHING TO WIN strategy. Anything to win includes EVILNESS. DO YOU NOT KNOW YOU ARE OPENING YOURSELVES TO BE USED BY FORCES WHICH ARE NOT OF CHRIST NOR LOVE? You are opening yourselves to THE MURDER OF YOUR BROTHER, and your message is the vehicle of MURDER.

Moses said, when accused by Aaron and Miriam, his brother and sister, and then again when accused by Aken who were jealous of the Authority which God had laid upon him, see they were used of evil and even stirred up a LYNCH MOB as McCain and Palin are ALLOWING THEMSELVES TO BE USED TO DO, and they said, "Who is Moses that he should lead us??" Just as McCain and Palin are asking in the spirit of WICKEDNESS and EVIL, "Who is Barack Obama that he should lead our nation?"

When Moses heard them saying these things he fell down on his knees before them and said, "Let God Judge between you and me." Miriam was struck with Leprosy I believe Aaron then Repented. As to Aken and his fellows, Moses cried out, "Who is on the side of the Lord let them seperate themselves From Aken." Then the earth opened up and swallowed Aken and his fellows and closed in on them.

Yes, I believe at this time it is that Serious. It is written, "Authority comes not from the nor from the right, but God raises up one man and puts down another." This Nation was born on these, Senator McCain has said in the past, "These Judeo-Christian Principles". Did he really believe and mean that? If he did then he knows what position he stands in when intruding on the WILL OF GOD.

I dare also to say Let God judge between Senator McCain and Governor Palin and their attack against their brother Senator Obama. If what McCain and Palin and their SURROGATES ARE ATTEMPTING AGAINST THEIR BROTHER SENATOR OBAMA IS OF THE NATURE OF EVIL, Let God Judge in what ever manner He chooses arightly to deal with ALL WHO SAY THEY ARE OF CHRIST THAT ARE INVOLVED.


Senator John McCain, Governor Sarah Palin, Sean Hannity, And Senator Barack Obama. So they all understand the Language and the meaning of this. Christ is God according to them all. So, if He is really their God and they are his children, in the book of Hebrews in The Judeo Christian Bible it says, "Do not despise when you are Disciplined by the Lord For the Lord disciplines all those who are considered his sons/daughters. If you be without discipline you do not belong to God and are illigitimate." Would Christ behave as a RACEBAITER? Would Christ Behave as "THE ACCUSER OF HIS BROTHER? Would Christ INCITE HATRED AND MURDER AT his rallies? I think not....I really think not.


Posted by: need4trth | October 10, 2008 12:35 AM | Report abuse



Posted by: scrivener50 | October 10, 2008 12:29 AM | Report abuse

Yeah, and McCain was a drunk and his wife was a drug addict. Palin's husband is a convicted drunk driver.
So what's the point?

Posted by: tommyd60 | October 10, 2008 12:19 AM | Report abuse

Always nice to hear that people are participating int he democratic process.

"Anger Is Crowd's Overarching Emotion at McCain Rally"

""I'm mad! I'm really mad!" another man said, taking the microphone and refusing to surrender it easily, even when McCain tried to agree with him.

"I'm not done. Lemme finish, please," he said after a standing ovation. "When you have Obama, [House Speaker Nancy] Pelosi and the rest of the hooligans up there going to run the country, we have to have our head examined.

"It's time that you two represent the rest of us. So go get 'em."

The crowd burst into loud chants of "U-S-A! U-S-A!""

Posted by: nowanna3 | October 9, 2008 11:55 PM | Report abuse

Maybe he sold Palin her pot?

""I can't claim a Bill Clinton and say that I never inhaled.""

"Yeah, that was the guy. I don't recall Obama ever answering the question either.

Posted by: JakeD"

Posted by: nowanna3 | October 9, 2008 11:36 PM | Report abuse

Yeah, that was the guy. I don't recall Obama ever answering the question either.

Posted by: JakeD | October 9, 2008 11:21 PM | Report abuse

I think I read the book a long time ago. Has anyone on the East Coast seen the SNL special tonght?

Posted by: JakeD | October 9, 2008 11:13 PM | Report abuse


It came up in the primary and didn't seem to go anywhere. Of course then the Hillary folks were just bringing it up to be helpful, lol.

Posted by: nowanna3 | October 9, 2008 11:08 PM | Report abuse


A Democrat asked the question (in the context of saying the GOP would bring it up) right after Iowa. Notwithstanding, given Obama's admissions so far, the question is reasonably calculated to lead to the discovery of relevant evidence.

Posted by: JakeD | October 9, 2008 11:03 PM | Report abuse


If you like to read try the book I Robot or this one...

Posted by: nowanna3 | October 9, 2008 11:02 PM | Report abuse

Just finished watching iRobot.

Posted by: JakeD | October 9, 2008 10:57 PM | Report abuse

Maybe he just gave them away to his friends?

Can you point to where someone asked him and he didn't answer?

I guess politics will take an interesting turn if we make all the candidates list all the things they have not done.


If I had proof that Obama sold drugs, I wouldn't ask the question. As far as I know, he has not denied it.

Posted by: JakeD"

Posted by: nowanna3 | October 9, 2008 10:57 PM | Report abuse

Sen. McCain could really help those few voters who have not already decided that his campaign has descended into farce. All he needs to do is pick one slimey and misleading line of attack and stick with it. Is Obama the "man nobody knows" or is he the "biggest celebrity in the world"? Is he a "man of the street" (you know, the mean streets of Hawaii) or an "elitist" who attended all the best schools? Does he "pall around with terrorists" and want to destroy the country, or is he just "not ready to lead" it yet? The Senator clearly wants to continue embarrassing himself and the nation by running a nasty "Dumb and Dumber" campaign. He should at least pick a consistent theme.

Posted by: Justadad1 | October 9, 2008 10:53 PM | Report abuse

John McCain is not man enough to own his sh^t. John McCain will not openly confront Obama with his smears and lies and innuendo. John McCain will not come out and talk about Ayers, he has to be asked. That is why he goes to places like Fox News, so he can be asked. What a coincidence.

John McCain is a coward.

John McCain would rather hide behind his wife and Sarah Palin than say it himself.

He would rather produce 2 minute ads that his campaign will never pay to air anywhere, and hope that the tire-swinging media will bring up the topic so he doesn’t have to do it himself.

John McCain just wants to throw sh^t out there, and "raise questions" about Obama, and hope his supporters connect the dots, because he is too much of a coward to directly push this toxic stew. He would rather hide behind Palin, Frank Keating right-wing bloggers, surrogates, and scummy websites staffed with wingnut welfare recipients like the NRO and the Weekly Standard.

John McCain had 90 minutes to bring this stuff up to Obama, to his face, and passed.

John McCain is a liar and a coward.

Posted by: DrainYou | October 9, 2008 10:52 PM | Report abuse


If I had proof that Obama sold drugs, I wouldn't ask the question. As far as I know, he has not denied it.

Posted by: JakeD | October 9, 2008 10:51 PM | Report abuse

Head of State

The Impulsively Unreflective Duo In..."McCain Goes Negative!"

In our last episode, we saw the indomitable, impulsive duo suspend the campaign to take on the Crisis on Wall Street! Now, watch, as, in our next episode...McCain Goes Negative!

McCain paces the floor in the Fortress of Irritability. He is cracking walnuts.

A walnut slips to the floor.

McCain: Damn nutcracker!

Sarah Palin is sitting in a chair at a desk. She is writing on a piece of paper: "J.M + S.P." This is then crossed out and replaced by "S.P. + J.M.". These alternating versions , the one before it always crossed out, continues down the page.

McCain: Well, the first plan didn't work. We tried to put them in a trance with the folksy ray, but they had their deflectors halfway raised. If only you hadn't called the commander in Afghanistan "McClellan"

Palin: But...didn't you say they were fighting a civil war, Sir?

McCain looks at Palin silently. He is smiling but he is holding back anger.

McCain: I think the time has come. We have to call in...Dr. Negative.

He pushes a large black button, which is the only button, on a red phone on his desk.

Dr. Negative immediately bursts through the door. He is carrying flyers, masking tape; telephone wires are wrapped around his arms hanging in every way; a tattered copy of the book "Accusations of Fascism, Communism, Terrorism, Drug Use, Pedophilia, Islamism, Adultery, Pandeism, Cannibalism, Cubism, Miscegenation, and Spousal Abuse...for Dummies!" is rolled and stuffed in his left pocket, filled with bookmarks; he is dragging a Robocaller behind him, leashed to a chain.

Dr. Negative (quickly, eagerly): Did you hear? Obama was born in Bin Laden's subterranean bomb making factory, outside of U.S. lines. He was born on a pile of cocaine and dynamite--and the midwife was a Trotskyite!

McCain: Not yet, Dr. Negative. I want you to meet Sarah.

Sarah: Oh, we've already met.

Dr. Negative: That trooper went down! He poisoned the salmon milk at the Wasilla Bible school! With drugs made at a Leftist Satan worshiping collective! That you could see from Russia!

Sarah: You betcha'!

Sarah and Dr. Negative give each other a high five. Dr. Negative's telephone wires rattle on his arm as he does so, triggering the Robocaller, which starts playing "...illegitimate babies made in test tube factories in North Korea and sent to Chicago by Bill Ayers..."

Dr. Negative shuts off the Robocaller with an embarassed smile.

Dr. Negative: Just practicing.

There is a pause.

McCain: That's fine, Dr. Negative. That's fine. Because, now, I have a special job for you. An important one.

Dr. Negative leaps into the air with excited glee. As he does, detritus falls to the floor--buttons reading "Election Day: Remember, the 3rd Tuesday in November!", business cards, reading "Push Polls Anonymous--We Call, They Fall", "Mongers On Call-No Rumor Too Far fetched"; Bandaids with purple hearts; mangled and dirty chads.

Dr. Negative: A new job! A special job! Oh, Mr. McCain! I'm ready! I'm ready!

Sarah watches from her chair, filing her nails.

McCain: Now, Dr. Negative. You have to make him seem radical...

Dr. Negative quickly pulls a can out of his right pocket, emblazoned with the word "Radical" He opens the top. Red and Black snakes fly out.

Dr. Negative: (eagerly, expectantly, hungrily) Yes...Yes...

McCain: You'll have to start rumors that are so inflammatory that they will spread like wildfire, and that will be started too late to stop them with the actual truth...

Dr. Negative pulls a gigantic grinder out of his left pocket. It is labeled "Rumor Mill". He turns the crank a few times. Hamsters, syringes, and Peace symbols fly out.

Dr. Negative: Yes...Yes...

He is salivating.

McCain: They will have to be so incredible, so over-the-top, based on such tawdry and poorly sourced evidence, yet riddled with tempting minutia--bullet gauges, Google maps of supposed meetings and the like, that the right will eat them up, and start analyzing the minutia with adolescent glee.

Dr. Negative (Very calmly, matter of fact): Oh, that's easy. They'll eat anything.

Dr. Negative reaches into his back pocket, pulls out a manila envelope labeled "Minutia: So-called "Proof" for the Right". He empties it to the floor. Bullet gauge measures, outdated copies of Photoshop, paperbacks entitled "How to Use the Insane as Competent Witnesses", "The Faked Moon Landings! Roswell! And Other Believable Phenomena!" and "You TOO Can Be A Warrior--From Your Own Couch!" fall to the floor.

Sarah plucks out the "Faked Moon Landings" book. She starts reading.

McCain: We know how our girl loves to read.

Sarah stops, and begins fixing her hair in a hand mirror.

Now, Dr. Negative, there is one final task.

Dr. Negative: Yes, Mr. McCain?

McCain: It is very difficult. Very...dark.

Dr. Negative: (Leaning forward expectantly, his voice quivering with excitement): Yes, Mr. McCain, Yes?

McCain: You will have to play the card that they played against me. Do you understand?

The room becomes silent. Sarah stops looking at herself, and looks towards the center of the room where McCain and Dr. Negative are staring at each other.

Dr. Negative: You mean...(eyes widened with disbelief. His telephone wires are quietly shaking as he shivers).

McCain (nodding): Yes.

Dr. Negative slowly removes from his jacket pocket what seems to be an ordinary pack of playing cards. They are labeled "Joker" brand. He takes a penknife from his pocket, and slowly slices the covering cellophane. There is a slight and distant roar. He looks at McCain.

McCain nods.

Dr. Negative then slowly removes the red ribbon encircling the cellophane at the top of the pack. He inserts the penknife--holding it from it very farthest end--and flips open the top of the pack.

Smoke begins to pour from the top of the pack, thick, acrid smoke. It quickly fills the room, covering all that is in sight.

McCain (shouting amidst the sound of smoke rushing into the room): And remember--no fingerprints!

Next episode: The smoke is cleared.

Head of State

Posted by: robthewsoncamb | October 9, 2008 10:43 PM | Report abuse

Dennis Miller is great.

Posted by: JakeD | October 9, 2008 10:40 PM | Report abuse

Not sure if he did JakeD, do you have any proof?

In the meantime it looks like the Alaska Supreme Court feels the legislative Troopergate should continue.

I'd rather be facing smears than subpoenas.

"That website does not answer whether Obama sold drugs.


Maybe Dr. Mark does not perform on-line diagnosis.

Posted by: JakeD"

Posted by: nowanna3 | October 9, 2008 10:36 PM | Report abuse


That website does not answer whether Obama sold drugs.


Maybe Dr. Mark does not perform on-line diagnosis.

Posted by: JakeD | October 9, 2008 10:23 PM | Report abuse

From: Q Pulpit
To: Republicans
Re: The pathetic McCain campaign
Date: 10/8/08


You people are so pathetic, I just made another donation to the Obama campaign in celebration of your patheticness. Yes YOU, you with the McCain sign in your yard. YOU ARE PATHETIC. Go to the nearest mirror. What you see is what pathetic looks like. If you don't agree, then you are pathetic AND stupid.

Our country is at war (which, by the way, we didn't need to be), our economy is a wreck (which, by the way, is your fault too), and we face a terrorist threat (which, by the way, the policies of your party have made worse). You Neo-cons, supply siders, and theological misfits put the country into the intensive care ward. And then, to put the cherry on top of your mountain of stupid, you nominate John McCain. Republicans, this is what happens when you spend to much time listening to the lunacy of Pat Robertson and falling asleep in science class.

John McCain did everything he could to get George Bush, the architect of American misery, re-elected. John McCain can't even take his daily vitamin supplement without checking to see if it was approved by George Bush's ministry for untruths (aka Fox News). Don't you realize that "lost on stage" Johnny is not just George Bush's third term but is literally George Bush's third testicle? Do you smoke 52 flavors of crack?

The country is facing big problems and John McCain is too cowardly to debate issues. Osama bin Laden is on the loose and John McCain is too cowardly to attack the cave where he is. John McCain is too stupid to analyze the problems we face, too small to meet the challenges we face, and too confused to realize that the ignorant, bigot rabble that have begun appearing at his rallies aren’t going to save his tired, wrinkled ass.

Republicans, good grief, even you don't like him and it's easy to see why. Just like you and your party, the man's a coward without any moral or intellectual compass. John McCain cheated on his wife, that means you nominated an adulterous liar for the highest office in the land. John McCain flip-flopped on torture, that means you nominated someone who would rather take bamboo up his backside than stand up to George Bush. John McCain doesn't want to talk to Spain (?? What in the hell ??), that means you nominated someone who would rather piss off every ally we have than tell the cowards in Iran what he thinks of them to their face. John McCain sat on the board of the World Anti-Communist League, that means you nominated someone who would sell-out Isreal for a piece of political candy. You beat your chest on national security, and then you nominate some clown who can't understand that occupying one country and employing diplomacy with no countries will have no effect on a terrorist organization with operations in eighty countries.

I’d love to be campaigning against a maverick, but all I see is a gerbil named Sidney who cant even come out from under his drug addicted, trophy wife’s skirt to speak his lies in the light of day. Tell your coward Sidney to quit staring at Bozo the Palin’s chest and campaign on the issues. Tell your coward Sidney to quit hiding in the cornfields of Iowa and tell the truth for a change. Tell your coward Sidney to quit babbling about earmarks and try rewriting his economic plan for the fiftieth time (and no he can't cheat off Warren Buffet's notes). Tell your coward Sidney to quit hiding the idiot incest spawn of a religious fundamentalist and an illiterate 3rd grade dropout on Fox News and let Keith Olberman interview her so I can at least get some entertainment out of his crappy campaign. Tell your coward Sidney to quit running in place on his rhetorical gerbil wheel and get me my morning paper so I can slap him in the face with it.

John McCain has stuffed himself so far into the anus of dirty politics that it would take an army of proctologists to fish him out. John McCain nominated a running mate who is too stupid to realize what she has been reading (if Bozo the Palin can in fact read).

You moron Republicans are dwelling in the Outer Limits if you think a worthless, stray kitten like John McCain is worthy of the Presidency. Well what’s wrong is the chain of fools in your coalition. Make an attempt to adjust your thought process to the tweny-first century. We are controlling this election. If we wish to be louder, we will shower Barack Obama with small donations in order to turn up the volume. If we wish to be softer, we will use the internet to make your racist whisper campaigns look as inept as George Bush's administration. We control the vertical. We control the horizontal. We can send YouTube clips out every day showing John McCain babbling about "bottled water for dehydrated babies", getting lost on stage after his own speech, claiming he wants to "veto beer", singing "Bomb, bomb Iran", or blinking like some epileptic has a vendetta against a light switch. We can shove the image of Barack Obama down your throats until you deservedly choke on it. We can change the focus to the soft blur of John McCain long list of flip-flops or sharpen it to examine John McCain's association with a pack of anti-semites and racists. So shut the hell up and get started on your list of cry-baby reasons as to why you are going to lose this election and when Barack Obama's organizers come down your street to help your neighbor understand what jackasses you are, BE POLITE. Understand that the problem this country has is YOU Republicans. But rest assured, you are about to participate in a great adventure. You are about to experience the awe and majesty of an Obama administration.

Help Sidney get off the stage without stumbling and send him home to his mommy; the ring in her toilet bowl needs a good tongue cleaning.

Posted by: QPulpit | October 9, 2008 10:22 PM | Report abuse

Obfuscation,obfuscation, obfuscation! He can't stand on the issues so he has to rely on character assasination!

Posted by: asclepious2 | October 9, 2008 10:19 PM | Report abuse

Obama has nothing to hide. His life and youth are documented in his books. MCCain is having his flunkies trying to take focus off the economy and trying to sideswipe the campaign by diverting attention to phony accusations. Obama will not get involved with phony lies and back and forth because that is just what McCain wants. It is a Republican sleeze technique and they have used it before but it won't work this time, no it won't. But the ratboys keep holding on to this smear technique, like Gollum holding on to the ring as he burns to death while sinking into the molten lava.

Here are the facts on Obama's own site addressing the Ayers issue.

I think that is all he needs to do. Why should he get involved in a back and forth BS session when he has his mind on more important things like - duh, what he's going to do about the economy when he's in the White HOuse? Something McCain is not interested in apparently.

To Keating, Miller and McCain who I know have skeletons in their stinking closets - get lost ratboys.

Posted by: skolniks | October 9, 2008 10:12 PM | Report abuse

"An investigation into Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin's firing of her public safety commissioner can proceed, Alaska's Supreme Court ruled Thursday, clearing the way for a Friday report to the state Legislature on the issue.
Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin has denied wrongdoing in the July departure of her public safety commissioner.

Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin has denied wrongdoing in the July departure of her public safety commissioner.

Allies of Palin, the Republican vice presidential nominee, had sued to halt the Legislature-initiated investigation, saying the investigation is an attempt by Democrats to sabotage the GOP ticket.

The justices unanimously upheld an Anchorage judge's ruling last week that dismissed the Republican lawsuit and upheld subpoenas for top Palin associates."

Posted by: nowanna3 | October 9, 2008 10:12 PM | Report abuse

Lets see what other "jello"can we throw against the wall. we have tried anti american,terrorists,drugs,muslim,black extremist and now drugs. Wow, something better stick or we are in real doo doo. What am I paying you guys the big bucks for?

Posted by: ephetsgma | October 9, 2008 9:52 PM | Report abuse

The auto industry is on the brink of collapse, banks are on the verge of being nationalized, my 401K has been gutted. And the brown-shirts are enraged over NOTHING. Like Pooh and Piglet tracking the Heffalump through the snow, what they are actually following is their own tracks in the snow. When you right wingers are through with your circle jerk please leave quietly - there's a country to be rebuilt and you have proven beyond all doubt that you are not up to the task.

Posted by: HeavyD1 | October 9, 2008 9:32 PM | Report abuse

Everybody needs to read this story about Palin's INVOLMENT in the America hating fringe Alaska Independence Party and how she tried to further their agenda and put their leaders in political positions. Please pass this on. The article is at Get on Fox News and the other media outlets run this story

Posted by: qneee | October 9, 2008 9:29 PM | Report abuse

When will the news media get around to reporting the issues? We are hungry for issues reporting. The nation's economy in faltering and you keep reporting on these character smears. These things are small beer compared to what's happening with the markets.

Posted by: osullivanc1 | October 9, 2008 9:11 PM | Report abuse

More classy comments from the Republicans. But, what would we expect. They have trashed the country and now they can only hope to trash their opponents. Not this time, my friends.

Posted by: johnsonc2 | October 9, 2008 9:00 PM | Report abuse

Sniff, sniff -- what's that smell? Oh, yeah, DESPERATION.

Why can't you miserable twits shut up and take it like men.

Oh, right, because you're whiny ass titty baby Republicans.

Posted by: PeterPrinciple | October 9, 2008 8:59 PM | Report abuse

OK, first of all Obama did address his drug experimentation in his book and during the primary. In fact he was probably more honest than most. He didn't try the old "I didn't inhale."

Second of all, if you're going to bring up someone's past indiscretions, you might want to shy away from a guy named KEATING!

Posted by: IndependentVotingDem | October 9, 2008 8:59 PM | Report abuse

Obama did what most of Americans did in those days, he experimented with drugs (marijuana and diet pills and beer) come now who didn't let him or her throw the first stone. McCain is throwing a lot of stones so he must not think discarding his wife who was disfigured in the wreck was a sin against God. Maybe being a Republican like his mentor George Bush, just maybe God told him to do that or he would never be President. Sarah Palin said she quit the drug scene because it would be unacceptable for the kids. Who taught her daughter to have sex outside of marriage? Maybe she should have quit that also to set an example.

Posted by: racam | October 9, 2008 8:40 PM | Report abuse

Maybe Obama will tell us why he can't produce proof of citizanship. So far Mr. Obama has refused to produce the documents in the Berg vs Obama case and is trying to fight the court order to produce the documents.
Any American should be able to prove citizenship in less than a day. Why can’t Mr. Obama?

Here is a link to the actual court documents -

A constitutional crisis will rip our country apart. If this is not cleared up now we will have a crisis. If you care at all about America you must call for Mr. Obama to produce the documents and prove that he is eligible to be President.

Please Rally Congress to have Mr. Obama produce the documents to prove his constitutional qualifications.

Posted by: tunes59 | October 9, 2008 8:39 PM | Report abuse


I'll save you the trouble, it was three hours.

Posted by: wes1155 | October 9, 2008 8:20 PM | Report abuse

I see you just answer the questions you find convenient for you and don't even bother to defend your slanted views.

That is the definition of an intellectual coward.

At least you and McCain have something in common.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 8:13 PM | Report abuse

You see, McCain, Obama personal matters are ALL tit-for-tat and none of it matters compared to the destruction of our America that's going on right now.

Let's focus on the issues.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 8:10 PM | Report abuse

" McCain did that already during the Rick Warren interview"
What McCain said was "my failed marriage".

Not, my wife who stood by me while I was a POW was deformed in a car accident and when I returned home I immediately started cheating on her because she was no longer the attractive woman I left behind so I eventually dumped her and left my kids behind when I found my sugar-mama.

Because that is what happened.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 8:07 PM | Report abuse

McCain really needs to fire up his core base. I suggest that his campaign burn a cross after each rally.

Posted by: hamishdad | October 9, 2008 8:04 PM | Report abuse

" (Obama hasn't even done that).

Posted by: MarkInAustin | October 9, 2008 7:58 PM "
Obama submitted his full medical records for review for as long as people wanted to see them.

You are poorly informed and I think you are lying about being a physician.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 8:02 PM | Report abuse

hamishdad, McCain did that already during the Rick Warren interview. I will be right back after I double-check how long the Post and other media's medical experts had access to the full McCain file (Obama hasn't even done that).

Posted by: MarkInAustin | October 9, 2008 7:58 PM | Report abuse

McCain should come clean about cheating on his first wife. "He ought to admit, 'You know, I've got to be honest with you. I am a lying dog. I cheated on my wife. I was not faithful to her or to God. I dumped her when she was sick, whhen she needed me the most'"

Posted by: hamishdad | October 9, 2008 7:56 PM | Report abuse

Palin smoked dope and inhaled.

Here is Sarah's own admission of pot use. May I say who cares?:

Palin Smoked Pot, But Said She Doesn’t Support Legalizing It. “Palin doesn’t support legalizing marijuana, worrying about the message it would send to her four kids. But when it comes to cracking down on drugs, she says methamphetamines are the greater threat and should have a higher priority. Palinsaid she has smoked marijuana -- remember, it was legal under state law, she said, even if illegal under U.S. law -- but says she didn’t like it and doesn’t smoke it now. ‘I can’t claim a Bill Clinton and say that I never inhaled.’” [Anchorage Daily News (Alaska), 8/6/06]

Palin Admitted Inhaling Marijuana. “Palin, who has admitted to inhaling as a young woman, said little. But she repeatedly asked why, if the goal was growing hemp for clothing, did the group write the initiative to make it legal to smoke marijuana to get high?” [Anchorage Daily News (Alaska), 10/26/00]

Posted by: jnail1 | October 9, 2008 7:56 PM | Report abuse

"McCain was checked out by his own doctors. I'm fine bringing ALL the candidates' (and wife's) issues to the table.

Posted by: MarkInAustin | October 9, 2008 7:51 PM |"
And submitted what, 12? pages of a several hundred page report to journalists to look at for how long?, something like 30 minutes?

So, how do you feel about Mcain's heavy drinking and smoking for over 25 years?, you being a physician ought to know some of the effects.

So bring it to the table MarkinAustin.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 7:54 PM | Report abuse

McCain was checked out by his own doctors. I'm fine bringing ALL the candidates' (and wife's) issues to the table.

Posted by: MarkInAustin | October 9, 2008 7:51 PM | Report abuse

Cindy McCain is a beer heiress, does that make her a "pusher" of the most destructive substance-alcohol in America?

I wonder how many people have died from liver disease, auto accidents, how many broken families etc.

You see, innuendo can be tit-for-tat.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 7:48 PM | Report abuse

"At least Cindy McCain was "proud" of America PRIOR to when her husband ran for President.

Posted by: MarkInAustin | October 9, 2008 7:38 PM "
I see, so just wave an American flag and all is forgiven?

Republitards are really good at sloganeering while they screw the American public and commit illegal acts.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 7:46 PM | Report abuse

Read Obama's books, he did come clean on drug use. Bush never has.

And knowing Navy pilots, (Remember Tailhook?) I don't think McCain really wants to go there.

Once again, the McCain people are trying to change the subject from the economy.

Posted by: dcwsano | October 9, 2008 7:43 PM | Report abuse

I am not upset about Obama's past drug use because he freely admits it and it hasn't appeared to have damaged him. No one who has used drugs or alcohol heavily can think as clearly as he does which explains McCain's erratic behavior.

I am upset over Bush's party days because it has been denied and either it had REALLY damaged him or he is even more inept than I had previously thought.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 7:43 PM | Report abuse

Hey MarkinAustin: what do you think of McCain's heavy drinking and smoking for 25 years? - you claim to be a physician right?

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 7:39 PM | Report abuse

At least Cindy McCain was "proud" of America PRIOR to when her husband ran for President.

Posted by: MarkInAustin | October 9, 2008 7:38 PM | Report abuse


Is Mac going to let his wife deliver the drug use crap? You know, she of the prescription drug addiction?

Maybe St. Sarah, mother of the tweeker Track can deliver the smear.

NaaH. Too much to hope for.......


Posted by: toritto | October 9, 2008 7:27 PM | Report abuse

Hey John,
Did you notice the Dow fell another 700 points today?, do you care?, do you have any ideas?

Because Rome is burning while you play with yourself.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 7:26 PM | Report abuse

Obama's past drug use is nothing compared to the multiple prescription drugs McCain is taking now, not to mention being a heavy smoker and drinker for over 25 years.

When someone drinks heavily for that long the chances of them becoming an alcoholic is greatly increased. Alcoholism kills more people than all the drug use combined, it is one of the worst addictions. Misplaced anger and the propensity to tell bald-faced lies is a result of Alcoholism so I wouldn't be surprised to find out that McCain is an Alcoholic. We know one thing, his wife sure likes to steal drugs.

Either way he is a lying, losing coward.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 7:24 PM | Report abuse

ummm, he has, in his book he freely mentioned it.

Just a s soon as McCain comes clean with:
His treasonous activities as a POW, did he help us lose that war?

His complete screwing of the American public in his role in the Keating 5 (he was the only member who traveled with and had large investments with Charles Keating)

His REAL reason for picking a VP that has intimate ties to a secessionist group who's founder died in a plastic explosives deal gone wrong.

You see, innuendos can be tit-for-tat.

McCain, you are a coward and I would say it to your face.

Posted by: JRM2 | October 9, 2008 7:17 PM | Report abuse

What we don't know is how much cocaine he used, did he sell it, and when (or if) he stopped. Those of you UPSET with these types of questions being answered by Obama should ask yourself if you felt the same about Bush's alleged cocaine use.

Posted by: MarkInAustin | October 9, 2008 7:17 PM | Report abuse

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