Snake in the Bathroom
Rachel -- Love the snake story. The lil' fella looks pretty cute to me, but then I was raised in a tree-huggin' household that served as a rescue shelter for just about every member of the animal kingdom at one point or another -- SNAKE included.
The SNAKE in question was named Larry, whom my mother rescued from a panicked woman who had found him in her laundry. She then put Larry in a pillowcase, which she brought to the local nature store, where my mother was waiting in line to pay for birdseed. It was too cold outside to release Larry -- he'd missed his hibernation window lounging in that lady's laundry basket -- so my mother concluded (via logic typical of the vaguely deranged nature lover) that he should hang out in our house with us until springtime.
Larry was a young garter snake with a great sense of humor, but his joke repertoire was somewhat limited. He had two main pranks. The first was pretty sophomoric: He would poop any time you picked him up. The second was somewhat more impressive: escaping from his terrarium and finding other creative places to take a nap. This second prank resulted in more than one near-anuerysm for the member of the house who was least enthusiastic about Larry's extended visit, namely Dad. One time Larry curled up and dozed right at the top of the stairs; another time, he wrapped himself around the toilet in the bathroom.
A snake in a garden might catch you off guard. But true surprise is a grown man sprinting from the bathroom in a towel, spouting vocabulary words that his young daughter would not fully come to appreciate until high school.
-- Caitlin Gibson
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