Oz Without GPS

Hey, where is everybody?

When in Oz, just follow the yellow brick road.

And watch out for witches and flying monkeys.

right here with ya, sort of, still got a lot of catching up to do...

Thanks for that Obamacon link frosty

Personally, I'm an unaffilated/independant

I guess you would call me a ObamaCAN.

Sí Se Puede!

Ah...the joys of driving in Oz! Left hand turns into oncoming traffic are always fun, but even walking around Sydney can be an adventure...faithfully looking right then left before stepping off the curb and nearly being killed because you forgot that they drive on the wrong side of the road. Plus, thanks for confirming about the wipers and turn signal. My wife never believed me when I told her about this. Also, did you have a manual or automatic? Shifting with your left hand is an adventure in itself.

I managed to do a stupid tourist driving trick near Orlando's International Drive on Saturday. I couldn't remember seeing that part of it (around the Prime Outlet Mall) and quickly realized that no guy in his right mind would venture into the area, except perhaps to visit the Bass Pro Shop, which is so overwhelming that I suspect it's better just to browse the catalog, which doesn't have the big fish tank nor the Toyota pickup entirely covered with magnetic vinyl material (the sort they cut fridge magnets from, I guess) in camoflage. The hunter variety that looks like forest wallpaper, complete with leaves and twigs. No pixellated stuff or abstractions.

Before that, I'd braked for a turkey crossing the road west of Vero Beach. A real turkey. It's rare enough to see one on road shoulders, much less on the pavement.

Later in the day, a rented truck at a very large furniture-type store had a picture of what looked like a Spigelia flower. That didn't seem what you'd expect on a rental, so I went over and found it was commemoration of Alabama's "botanical lost world", the Bibb County glades, which have several plant species of their very own, including that Spigelia. How is it that a remarkable geology-botany spot discovered not so long ago got onto a rental van? I've never managed to promote flowers as charismatic megaflora, unless they're:
1. Strange Madagascar palms (Last weekend, I got to swoon over a baby Tahina spectabilis. Its scientific name is only a few months old!)
2. Heliconias. Guy plants, for sure.
3. Titan arums, the ones with huge stinky inflorescences. Leu Gardens in Orlando is growing one in the ground, outdoors.
4. Cycads, of course.
5. Mangos, lychees, avocados, jaboticabas. Definitely more charismatic than tomatoes (which are still OK. Nothing against them).

g'morning boodle! Had to switch browsers to get here, and wouldn't have thought to without the New Kit alert from Omni. Thanks.

Going immediately off kit to the last boodle-Someone please tell me how the son and grandson of Admirals is just a regular guy and the Obamas are elitists. Mr. F and I have worked mightily for Frostdottir to not wear his rank and expect the deference he is accorded, and he's not even a General, or Navy where rank matters so much more. It is an uphill battle, and one I think would be completely erased were she to gain some rank of her own, as McCain did (though not completely "on his own"). I have a hard time believing Sen. McCain is not a to-the-marrow elitist. Frostson escaped this as he was grown and out of the house before there was rank to speak of-"Rank among Lieutenants is like virtue among hoes," as it were.

In all about me news-the dryer repair dude was not too optimistic when I called this morning, but a service call is only $40 plus $.07 a mile (40 miles total)and he is available my first free morning when I get back to the great north.

Now, off to follow where JA's links take me and hack away at the Chez Frostbitten South landscaping. Amazing what having a little water in June will do.

Joel, can you confirm (having been there and seen it for yourself) that Australia, like Plum Island, is completely surrounded by water? One wonders how they are handling security, in that parlous, aqueously circumferenced condition. (I had originally typed "circumfrenched." Let us not go there -- at least, not today. Maybe some other day. Good thing I proofed.)

My wife and I love our GPS, which (whom?) my wife has named "Wanda," because of how she helps us wanda around the country. However, often "Miss Wanda" and I get into these little set-to's, such as the best way to get from here to Philadelphia. [N.B.: I am required by my spouse to adress the device respectfully as "Miss Wanda," rather than some of the more flavorful nautical terms I am inclined to use if I'd been alone in the car. Sailors, being on such intimate terms with all things navigational, tend in this, as in all things, to have their own specialized navigational jargon. Which includes, alas, not asking for directions, which pits the True Sailor against the GPS much more often than one would like.] [You women have often noted that "not asking for directions" is "a guy thing," which indeed it is. However, you may not understand or appreciate that it has its roots deep in the male psyche, the Viking/Italian/Portugeuse/Pacific Islander seafaring portion of the mid-brain known as the thorheyerdahl, a couple of fathoms south-soutwest of the amygdala, the portion of the brain that controls fear, emotion, and arm-waving.]

When receiving the correct directions from the GPS, I am required to respond meekly, "Yes, Miss Wanda." When Miss Wanda remarks (as she often does), "Please make a U-turn in 600 feet," I am required to remain mostly silent, although my wife *will* allow me to vent by grunting, mumbling, growling, etc., as long as no actual words come out.

Experience an easier way of shopping for bespoke suits & shirts at Euro Tailors

Kenny Surtani

Mad Joel: the Word Warrior

With apologies to:

TERRY HAYES
GEORGE MILLER
BRIAN HANNANT

THE DESOLATE AUSTRALIAN OUTBACK. DAY.

A sandstorm: Hard clouds of dust and sand swirl as the camera moves through the desert of the Australian Outback. Desolate, empty, beautiful, and carbuncular. We hear the howl of a rising wind.

As the camera moves ahead, a shadow looms out of the windblown sand. As we get closer, we see that it is the rusting remains of a massive oil pump, with a battered laptop computer on top of it.

The sound of the wind drops and the voice-over begins, the voice of a very old man. This is the Curmudgeon:

"The vision dims and all that remains are memories and blog comment threads. They take me back-back to the place and time where the black pump sucked guzzolene from the Earth and Editors ruled the day..."

DISSOLVE.

ANOTHER PART OF THE DESOLATE OUTBACK. DAY.

Out of the dust storm emerges the ancient wreck of a rental car. It is charred from Internet flaming, its wheels and sides studded with metal crossbow bolts, gardening tools and grilling implements. The dashboard is covered with old GPS devices, and a single golden compass.

CURMUDGEON, NARRATOR V/O
"I remember the terrible battles we fought - and the day we left the Bunker forever...

DISSOLVE.

A HILLTOP IN THE OUTBACK DESERT. DAY.

A warrior/journalist, dressed in leather and steel and a fedora with a "PRESS" tab sticking out of it, stands on a hill crest. This is JOEL. Behind him is that strange road vehicle seen previously: A Honda Accord with two engines and a seat mounted on the roof with a sextant on an overhead armature.

CURMUDGEON, NARRATOR V/O
"But, most of all, I remember the courage and large vocabulary of a strange dude, a road warrior and writer called Joel. To understand who he was you must go back to the last days of the old world...

FADE TO BLACK.

FADE IN TO THE MOB OF A POST-DEBATE SPIN ROOM, FULL OF BLOGGERS, JOURNOS, PALEONTOLOGISTS, AND POLITICOS...

...Joel, dressed in a rumpled shirt, and sipping a glass of white wine and talking to an attractive brunette who is obviously working the room...

FADE TO U.S. SOLDIERS DROPPING OUT OF HELICOPTERS, SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE EAST...

... and fighting their way across the sand.

CURMUDGEON, NARRATOR V/O

"... when, for reasons we still argue about to this day, a nation went to war on another ..."

AN OIL WELL ERUPTS...

"... and then another ... and another."

PLUMES OF FLAME SPOUT INTO A NIGHT SKY.

CURMUDGEON V/O:

"...and as the Internet flamed, nationless organizations tried to take advantage of it, and in the frenzy of everything, decay and the Second Law of Thermodynamics set in. The Global Economy began to crumble, and communication became more and more partisan, complaining became more important than compromise and solutions..."

THE CAMERA FOLLOWS A LINE OF CARS THAT STRETCHES FOR BLOCKS UNTIL IT FINALLY REACHES A GAS STATION.

An attendant pulls down a sign which reads:

$17 / Gallon

and replaces it with another sign:

AUTHORIZED VEHICLES ONLY

A group of angry motorists gather around, yelling and pushing. The attendant produces a gun motioning them back ...

CURMUDGEON V/O:
"...For without fuel, the liquid gold, they were nothing. Without Editors, they were nothing. They had built a boat of straw..."

A STOCK EXCHANGE ...
... those on the floor are yelling and shoving. "Sell! Sell! Sell!"

Torn up stock scrip litters the floor, a large computer screen in the background runs a ticker of falling stock prices, with a large graph showing a downward trend like the trajectory of a cliff diver...

THE FOYER OF A LARGE NEWSPAPER.

Prominent on the wall is the paper's crest. It is accompanied by the words:

THE BIG NEWS
"Changing News for a Changing World."

On the floor below, beyond the marble pillars, we see the building is abandoned - littered with broken furniture and piles of documents. The camera pulls into a tight shot to two of the piles, one with a "Voluntary Retirement Package" form, and another with "RIF Goals."

DISSOLVE. A CORRIDOR.

We pass through a door designated:

CHIEF EXECUTIVE

At the other end of the imposing room we see a businessman clearing out his vast desk. On the wall behind him we see photographs of politicians, celebrities, printing presses and oil wells.

He takes a pile of maps and puts them in his briefcase, followed by a copy of an O'Reilly HTML/XTML textbook and another, TEACH YOURSELF SOLAR ENERGY AND COPY EDITING.

DISSOLVE TO A LIVING ROOM.

An ANXIOUS FAMILY is gathered in front of a television set showing Fox News and their computer on the WashingtonPost.com site - a politician addresses the nation on both, with a time lag echo between the two:

POLITICIAN:
"Stage three of the national emergency is effective immediately, citizens are advised to ..."

The speech is cut short as static fills both screens.

The family looks up at the lights as they flicker...

IN A PRINTING FACILITY ... a giant press grinds to a halt.

IN A CITY STREET ...anxious faces look up as the street lights flick off.

IN A COMPUTER ROOM, POWER FLICKERS, AND OBVIOUS EMERGENCY LIGHTS KICK IN.

NARRATOR V/O
"People stopped in the streets and listened: for the first time they heard the sound of silence. No news. No engines. Nothing. This is what we have wrought."

NEXT: Finding Your Way With a Finger to the Wind, and YMMV.

Maybe.

bc

GPS, shmeePS... Don't need no steenkin' 'puter tellin' me where to go. Mrs. M tells me where to go all the time.

Anybody know how to get a minivan across the Styx without having to pay the ferryman? Kinda like that airport access road shortcut.

From Von Drehle's "The Great Wall of America":

Presidential candidates in both parties have learned this year to be wary of a subject that shows up in so many guises on so many different plates. What tastes like common sense to one voter--cracking down on illegal crossings--smacks of xenophobia to the next, and the same rumble of helicopters and border-patrol Jeeps in the Southwestern desert sounds to some people like America standing up for itself but to others like Emma Lazarus, poet of the Statue of Liberty, rolling over in her grave.

LL: ...And, umm, remind me again of how much helicopter surveillance is provided by our Department of Homeland Security over Plum Island?

Good mornin boodle
Sorry to hear of George Carlin's passing, what a brillant comic mind. He could make me laugh without dropping the F-bomb.I saw him a couple of times live and he was AC hurt your stomach laughing. Also loved him as Rufus in "Bill and Ted's excellent adventure" Who can forget Beeth-Oven and So-Crates. He will be missed.

Waterboarding? I thought that was what ya did down the ocean Hon.....maybe that was Boogie boarding.

Back to work in a few.Have a Happy day everyone!!

One of my favorite Carlinisms was when he played the Hippy-Dippy Weather Man, with the hippy-dippy weather, man. That's been riffing through my head all morning. He was indeed a trip. Very funny guy, although in later years he rode the F-bomb unnecessarily (I mean, does that word *really* shock anymore? It's used so ubiquitously). He was a funny, funny guy, and he'll be missed. Now, I wonder who will be picked for the Mark Twain Prize now? Unless they still honor him posthumously.

martooni, my personal preference would be to use a ramp to jump the Styx; just make sure to give yourself enough room to build up speed. Shouting "Yeeehaw!" during the jump is completely optional.

We're not criminals, We're not terrorists.
We're hardworking families and we need this:

Elvira's song:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vzan1afn1MI&feature=related

Frosti.... thought you might like this story...

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/06/22/AR2008062202107.html?hpid=topnews

Thanks to Very Short List, here's a great Safe for Work website...

"Now wasting time at the office has become much less risky, thanks to Read at Work, a website that houses cleverly disguised books in a fake Windows desktop environment; the days of bookworms' desperately clicking back to a spreadsheet when the boss approached are over.

"The site is a dead-on simulation of Windows with the books organized in desktop folders. Click and you'll see the text rendered as a Power Point presentation, with the words rolling into graphics, charts, and photo captions. You can read short stories, novels, and poetry -- by canonical authors such as Tolstoy and Orwell, and contemporary writers like Charlotte Grimshaw and Fiona Kidman."

http://www.readatwork.com/

STanding for ovation to bc's screenplay.

Who will be cast in the role of JOEL? I don't think Ryan Reynolds is right for the part. Brian Pressley might be good. (He'd need the fly-away hairpiece of course, but hey, that's just a makeup/CGI thing.) Might also accept one of the Walbergs.

Clearly, they ought to audition that Redford guy for the role of CURMUDGEON. I mean, sure, it's type casting. But sometimes you just got to go with the first, obvious gut choice, yanno? I mean, why tinker with the casting on that role. (If Redford kicks between now and the shooting day(s), fallback actor would be Harrison Ford, I think. Selleck has the rugged, weathered good lucks, but not the acting chops, methinks. And when things get tough, you expect him to be saved by Higgins.)

firsttimeblogger, I believe they'll still award the prize to Carlin.

After all, Mark Twain doesn't hand 'em out himself, does he?

bc

Thanks, Mudge.

I'd actually been sitting on that for a little while.

Today seemed like a good day to pull it out, dust it off, and polish it a bit.

The screenplay, I mean.

bc

SCC: "good lucks"??? Jeez. Good looks, of course.

I don't know where my mind is. Plum Island, I guess.

George Carlin was so excellent as Savannah's neighbor in the movie The Prince of Tides.

Pat Conroy's book.

Nelson deMille's book?

Mudge's roll must go to Morgan Freeman, no one can do the authoritative VO as well. Or go the non-actor route and really make it sound authoritative. How about the king of the VO David McCullough?

TBG-thanks for the PWC link. I hope the county survives the short financial attention spans of the newest home owners. Those who purchased near the VRE stations and work either in the District or near Metro will be happy, eventually. Does the WaPo dead tree edition still feature a zip-code in the home section once a week showing how the price appreciation/depreciation compares with the rest of the metro area? We spent years watching our zip creep downward, but we were happy with the house and the neighborhood. I think too many people forgot they had to live in their speculative purchase. Still thankful we sold at the top though, it's cushioning the fall here in FL.

Plum Island, that is......

Carlin also had a nice role in "Streets of Laredo," the 34th sequelae to the Lonesome Dove oeuvre, playing a crusty, curmudgeonly old-timer (why am I so drawn to these types of character parts?) married to psycho killer Joey Garza's Mexicano mother, IIRC.

And of course was in "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back," as the Hitchiker, and was Cardinal Ignatius Glick in the earlier Jay/Silent Bob epic, "Dogma."

Not on topic at all, but this news is interesting. On Balance or the "Mommy Blog" is over:

From the opening lines of last post:

Posted at 07:00 AM ET, 06/20/2008
Good-bye, Balance
Twenty-six months. More than 500 entries. Over 100,000 comments.

http://blog.washingtonpost.com/onbalance/

---
I ended up on the Boodle because of the intensity of feeling over there and the lack of humor.

Morgan Freeman? I can see Morgan Freeman; he does cantankerous right well. McCullough is all wrong for it; to literate, too educated.

If you want to go the non-actor route, I was thinking Levon Helm (though he had a few bits parts, and was almost unrecognizably ancient in "The Three Funerals of Whatshisname."

I've heard that Plumb Island is the only island in the world that is perfectly perpendicular to the Earth. It's also home to the rock band "Men Without Belts", the one-hit wonder who recorded "Safety Pants".

I celebrate the demise of On Balance. Glad it didn't linger.

Yoki! You're home! (Or at the office, same thing. You know what I mean, darn it.) Glad to have you back. In due course, you'll owe us a report on how you spent your summer vacation, of course.

Was thinkin' just last night, I miss me some Yoki (as mo would say).

I would welcome the transfer here of some of the "On Balance" patrons if they were all of the caliber of our dear CP. The screamers, not so much (not at all, in fact).

Always thought the title of "On Balance" a skosh ironic considering that so many of the commenters weren't.

I think there will be a subsequent blog called "Off Balance."

And it will be far more popular than the old one.

bc

Greetings, Yoki! Here is a midsummer poem, I recall from childhood that makes me think of you!

Midsummer Joys

Give me the joys of summer,
Of SUMMER QUEEN so faire,
With wreathes of lovely flowers
And fruits and sun-kist air!

Speak not to me of winter
With ice and frost and snow,
Nor changing spring and autumn
When howling winds doth blow.

No, I will take the joys
Of summer every time,
So to this QUEEN OF THE SEASONS
I dedicate my rhyme.

---
Make me think of you gathering fruits and making tarts and crumbles and clafouti for us all.

Hi Yoki! Welcome back!

Great script, bc. I think for the voiceover you can't do better than the plummy tones of James Earl Jones. Gravitas personified.

I am so, truly, delighted to hear that the Large Hadron Collider will not destroy the Universe. I have so many everyday things to worry about, I am relieved that the Looming Hadron Catastrophe will not occur.

That rather inconclusive but interesting story that's been creeping up the WaPo home page on gay versus straight brains, http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/06/22/AR2008062201994.html?hpid=topnews (you mean, it's *not* a Satanically inspired lifestyle "choice"?) reminds me that when I came into work this morning, there was a large poster in the lobby (which features largish posters announcing various events from time to time) that announced that this month was Gay and Lesbian Pride Month, which the HR dept. posted. And for a minute I didn't think anything of it one way or the other and then it suddenlty dawned on me. Wait a minute. I'm in a federal building, in a major federal agency. In the Bush Administration. In downtown Warshington, DC. And I thought, "Okay...what's wrong with this picture? Does Arbusto know? Is he cool with it? Would he like it that his tax dollars are being used to honor gay folk?"

So: just thought you'd like to know your fed'ral gummint is forescore in support of gay and lesbians persons. Says so right in our lobby.

Long as they don't wanna, like, get married or nothing.

Andrea Mitchell on MSNBC discussing the hubris of Obama (or was it his team) in messing with the Great Seal of the United States. (Gone in the redesign was the Seal of Solomon. Y'all remember ol Sol, right?)

Brilliant movie treatment. Can't wait for the sequel:

Mad Joel Beyond Achendome - Two editors go in; one article comes out.

Ivansmom, if there is a Large Hadron Catastrophe, I doubt it will take out the entire universe.

Maybe just the Earth, which only a few inhabitants of this here 'verse would miss.

Except for the aliens, who will miss their favorite Intergalactic TV Reality show, "Survivor: Earth."

Too bad if no one does.

bc

still playing catch-up, but before I forget to answer mostly's Tull question, I beleive it was in a movie I was watching. So looked it up on YouTube. I don't think I've ever heard that song before, but I really liked it and thought I'd share (the YouTube video isn't good, but the lyrics are).

As to it being the inspiration to Hotel California...Yeah there is a lot of that going around. Musical morons for the most part. The only similarities I hear between the two songs is that they both played in the same key. Besides, Hotel California was written a couple of years prior to being recorded so it predates the Tull song.

I'm torn between the free speech rights of McEwan and the rather undiplomatic way he voiced his opinion. I'm not sure anything he said rises to the level of hate crime. If so, most the statements of Christopher Hitchens vis-a-vis Christianity would be actionable as well.

At BigBoxOfBooks Friday night, I told my wife I was buying my dad 'The Politically Incorrect Guide(tm) to Islam (and the Crusades)' as a birthday present. You've really got to thumb through it a little to get the full effect.

http://www.amazon.com/Politically-Incorrect-Guide-Crusades-Guides/dp/0895260131

She wanted to know why I wanted to throw fuel on that fire. I'm just a trouble-maker and rabblerouser. But you knew that.

But bc, if the Earth is destroyed, will the Universe still continue to exist?

Ivansdad and I are completely unable to watch Survivor (or its offspring) due to the blatant false advertising inherent in the name. No matter how long those shows go on, nobody dies.

http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/washington/2008/06/obama-seal.html

Obama now has his own Great Seal already. And it is really, really big. It's big like the tires on those elevated pickups in the parking lot at NASCAR races where you look out the car window and see nothing but fist-sized lug nuts. ...

Plus it's got Obama's website right up there too. Lord knows, he needs more donations because the poor White Sox fan from Chicago's impoverished South Side has only raised a little under $290 million so far.

Back at basecamp after my six-week adventure in the wilds of the Dulles Corridor. Think getting lost in Oz is bad? Try taking a wrong turn off the Toll Road.

I have often been tempted to get a GPS unit because the surplus directional instinct claimed by Joel is nicely balanced out by my pathological deficit.

I have, and I kid you not, gotten lost in my home town.

On the other hand, my special skill for getting lost does allow me to frequently discover new and exciting places.

Like that speed trap just north of Reston.

I'd be a little more reassured about the LHC if I knew for an absolute certainty that no undercover Vogons were employed in its construction. Perhaps if every contractor had to compose some extemporaneous poetry, we could rest assured of its safety.

FYI, the Kennedy Center here has announced it will honor Carlin posthumously.

Carlin would be the very first to jump all OVER the word "posthumous." Can hear him now: "Humous. While you're alive, you're...humous. Then after you die, you're after-humous. No, that doesn't work. Previously humoused. No longer humous. Ah, I got it: posthumous."

Miss him already.

I'm a little sad that the plug was pulled on Onbalance, it was one of my favorite guilty pleasures. I also thought it was one of the funniest blogs on the web, but everyone has their favorite comic strip.

I not feeling sorry for myself though, I still have enough bad habits to keep me going for quite awhile.

DandyLion, that's because you were one of the fresh voices on the Mommy Blog. You were often funny but truly could relate experiences with your wife and four children and obviously have a respectful and healthy family relationship overall. I dropped in there occasionally and always liked your stuff - particularly when you were adding some levity. On balance, though, those folks were just scary.

23/6 is a satire site associated with the Huffington Post and they were the ones that closed captioned the Barack Obama commercial with the satirical asides. While Meghan McCain is over 21 and a supporter of her dad, her blog tends to be very non-partisan and I think 23/6 owes her an apology.

23/6 also does a lot of parody quizzes on the content of Maureen Dowd columns:

http://www.236.com/news/2008/06/02/maureen_dowd_a_readers_guide_6894.php

RD, I know the feeling. I've gotten lost in my own neighborhood and ended up knocking on dors and asking strangers, "Can you tell me where I am?"

Worse yet, the first time I had to do this, a contractor answered, "I can tell you the house number, but not the name of the street. Try next door."

Jake Tapper of ABCNews blogged about Obama's Great Seal makeover. The title of Tapper's blog entry: "The Audacity of Hype."

I got lost in Ashburn this morning because my son has borrowed my GPS that has my jobsites marked as favorites. These sites tend to be on roads without names yet. I eventually found it by dead recokoning until I crossed a road I recognized.

Personally I'm against great seals. I prefer otters because they can be so riverine.

Couldn't ever partake of "On Balance" it was so, so, can't quite find a word on the spectrum before repulsive but after off-putting.

JA writes in Slate:
"And I'll be careful, with hands on the wheel at 10 and 2.

Or maybe here it's 2 and 10." That's a very good way to break your arms, even better than hanging one out the window. In these days of airbags it should be 4 and 8, or 8 and 4 in Oz. Me? My nose will be broken because I use the farmhand technique of right hand at 10, right elbow leaning at 4. The better to close gates and do other chores with the left hand without getting out of the truck. Also good for developing that to the elbow tan.

That list of top 100 books from the last boodle - Did anyone notice any evidence of ballot box stuffing in the readers' list? I think I have my next blogpost idea.

Has anyone ever, rather recklessly, gotten lost on purpose? I used to do that. I would take a wrong turn, and instead of making an immediate u-turn I would instead, with stupid bravado, just continue forward into terra incognito.

I figured I would always eventually end up someplace I recognized. And I always did. Although sometimes with no real understanding how.

Probably my most frustrating experience getting lost occurred just a few years ago. I was driving in an undisclosed state to an undisclosed location.

I mean, I wasn't even allowed to mark where I was going on a map in my car. I was supposed to memorize it. So you can imagine my panic when I got lost. What was I supposed to do? I couldn't call anyone. I certainly couldn't stop for directions at the local Texaco. I had to just continue driving until I either found it or ended up shot.

After about 45 sweaty minutes I finally located the place.

This proving that the good Lord does take mercy on fools.

Fluvial. Otters are fluvial.

I won't have to worry about broken arms (though I don't use 10 and 2 anymore) because I'm short enough that my chest will probably collapse when the air bag deploys. That's why I don't have GPS - I don't want to hear the computer snicker. It is good to plan for these things.

Last week Ivansdad was driving down the road and saw where somebody had lost a lawn tractor. It had hit five cars and was sitting in the center of the highway, wheels still spinning. Let the GPS navigate around that.

for mudge: http://wallpapers.celebrityfun.info/wallpapers/Jessica_Biel/Jessica_BielNEkB.jpg

Grunwald alert: Florida is buying US Sugar's farmlands for $1.7 billion.

http://www.palmbeachpost.com/localnews/content/local_news/epaper/2008/06/23/0623_ussugardeal.html

RD Padouk I assume this was before the onset of the self destructing map?

I've never once been lost in a vehicle. I merely spend a large amount of time learning the lay of the land.

I figure as long as you've driven every road once before, you're never lost.

*weeping softly in the fetal position under my desk*

omni, the gummint censor gizmo won't let me open that page. I will have to wait until I get home.

Bless you, sir, anyway.

Does it feature her nose, up close? Oh, never mind. I'm in enough pain already.

Strange perhaps for a Ranger, Mr. F both wants and needs GPS, and much to my relief now has one. I used to think everyone could take a look at a map and instantly transfer the information to the terrain at hand. Now I have a theory that there are people who are honestly directionally challenged. They are observant, and can identify a KFC repurposed as a Korean restaurant as easily as anyone, they just couldn't get there from a map alone. Then there are people like Mr. F, who can read a map well enough and even remember directions well, but can't match what they see to their actions. A right turn at the next light involves getting into the right lane-but the nice GPS lady doesn't mention that she doesn't understand how he ever managed to get so far in "this man's army" and marvel at how LBS (lost bigger'n snit)he gets in a new city. It's a good thing I have other charms.

When I was living in South Florida fifteen years ago, the predictions were that there was only ten years of farmable muck left in the Fanjul sugar fields. Now that it's fully exploited, it is time to take the money and run while passing on the recovery costs to the taxpayer. Great timing on the buyout. It's too easy to be cynical.

Not to rub it in, but her nose looks positively radiant in omni's link. I've made my opinion of Ms. Biel public before. Not only is she no Angelina, but she's not even the World's Hottest Jessica.

http://livebythefoma.blogspot.com/2005/10/esquire-gets-it-wrong.html

That post does contain a picture of The Nosed One in a wet bathing suit that may slip under gummint blacklists. Just don't mouse-over the picture.

Omni, are we supposed to be impressed by that pulchritude?

Back from a cathartic lunch with several friends, one of whom lost her husband to suicide several weeks ago.

CP, I'm glad we picked you up from the MommyBlog. Scary place, that.

I do hope Joel will give us notice when he decides to close Achenblog, so we can find another place to gather. The thought of losing this gives me chills.

Damn cursor had a mind of its own...

:-)

Don't apologize, S'nuke. Looking at attractive barely clothed actresses is nothing to be ashamed of. At least it better not be or I'm in a heap of trouble. But now we know one place my blog isn't firewalled at.

yello, we may have to meet at dawn with pistols on the dueling grounds in Bladensburg. Angelina, pffffft. Feh. There is only one way to settle this.

Not yet, anyway, yello... :-)

What was Valerie Jarrett thinking? Baltimore Sun blog, "The Swamp," speculates that Obama may soon retire the Great Seal of Obama.

Paul Farhi has a very nice appreciation of Carlin, at http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/06/23/AR2008062300876.html?hpid=topnews. Jeez, I love it when a Post writer produces one of these heartfelt things on such short notice. One of the things I love about the newspaper biz: watching talent at work under pressure. Never tire of it.

Loomis, I'm sure there's a cozy blog over at the National Review that would love to read your thoughts. Hereabouts your schtick is wearing thin. Give it a rest.

Gotta head for the bus momentarily, but thought I'd leave you guys with this nice tune cootie. I tried four or five YouTubes of the same song, and didn't much like the audio on any of them. But this is about the best I could find on short notice. For some reason it reminds of Carlin. Enjoy.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CHdgyinhKhU

Post's Top Editor Steps Down
Ending 17-year tenure, Executive Editor Leonard Downie Jr. will be newspaper's vice president at large.

Howard Kurtz | 4:52 p.m. ET

Sad to hear about Carlin. To this day when I hear a weather report and they give the temperature at National, a little voice says "but who lives at the airport?".

Farhi's article is excellent. Great to read that Carlin sat for an interview with him while he was in college.

More big changes at The Post (although not completely a surprise) as Leonard Downie is stepping down as executive editor after Labor Day:
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/06/23/AR2008062301440.html?hpid=topnews

New kit!

Lovely to be back (and the warmth of your greetings does my heart good).

My goodness, the testosterone level is higher even than usual around here today.

I read your piece on GPS in Slate. I am a lone voice among my friends in refusing to use GPS. When I was young, I was the navigator on my father's boat. I loved it and convinced him not to get LORAN (the precursor to GPS). I also find it invigorating to figure the landscape out myself. Good to hear someone else shares this viewpoint.

I couldnt disagree with you more about GPS! My dad got me a TomTom for Christmas and talk about Confidence in a Box....the though of never getting lost, never having to drive in circles trying to find a unmarked street...and the Home function is worth its wait in Gold...No matter where you are, you will always get home safety. Now, I can drive to St. pete and Saroata and any place I choose...it is remarkabley freeing and it beats Map quest as well and you can't get Lost (i wanted to emphiaize that part!) and it is so useful for Work (I have to drive to home to tutor students) and for Play-Drove to Fort desoto without a whimper....I can't say enough good things about the TOM TOM ONE !! (lastly, My dad is a walking GPS but for people like me it is truely a God Send-Like Fire from the Gods to enlighten my path till I reach my destination!

I couldnt disagree with you more about GPS! My dad got me a TomTom for Christmas and talk about Confidence in a Box....the though of never getting lost, never having to drive in circles trying to find a unmarked street...and the Home function is worth its wait in Gold...No matter where you are, you will always get home safety. Now, I can drive to St. pete and Saroata and any place I choose...it is remarkabley freeing and it beats Map quest as well and you can't get Lost (i wanted to emphiaize that part!) and it is so useful for Work (I have to drive to home to tutor students) and for Play-Drove to Fort desoto without a whimper....I can't say enough good things about the TOM TOM ONE !! (lastly, My dad is a walking GPS but for people like me it is truely a God Send-Like Fire from the Gods to enlighten my path till I reach my destination!

Gegendarstellung von Tobias Franke http://www.lindpark.de
Bezieht sich auf: http://www.lindparkag.squarespace.com und
blog.washingtonpost.com/.../2008/06/23/mccain_ denounces_top_aides_com.html?hpid=topnews&hpid=topnews

Erstens ich habe nie behauptet das ich mein Studium abgeschlossen hätte.
Mein Lebenslauf ist richtig, nur habe ich auf lückenlose Details im chronologischen
Ablauf verzichtet. Ferner habe ich nie behauptet hauptberuflich als Banker einer
führenden Bank tätig gewesen zu sein.

Zweitens ist es ferner eine unrichtige Behauptung ich hätte Anleger der WBB
in den Ruin getrieben. Ich habe lediglich deren Produkte am Telefon verkauft.
Man kann mir keine Schuld geben das die erwarteten Gewinne nicht eingetroffen sind. Das dann die Anlegergelder weg waren, ist bedauerlich.
Das gleich gilt für die Diagenics, in der ich nachfolgend tätig war. Ich habe die
Produkte im guten Glauben nur verkauft. Für die Verluste bin ich nicht verantwortlich.
Auch bei meinem anschließenden Engagement bei Caviar Creater ist es leider
unglücklich gelaufen. Die Strategie und Produkte waren erstklassig, ich kann nichts
dafür wenn die Anleger leer ausgehen. Ich habe soviel Anleger gewonnen wie möglich und stets meine Provision erhalten.
Das es auch bei Ecomares nicht gut ausging ist nicht meine Schuld. Ich habe viele Anleger überzeugt und mir den ganzen Tag den Mund fusselig geredet. Leider hatten wir kein Glück und die Anleger verloren ihren Einsatz.
Ich bin traurig das dies auch bei der EMC der Fall war, denn gerade hier konnte ich viele Investoren zur erheblichen Anlage bewegen. Das EMC nicht seriös war wußte ich nicht. Von den Strategie war ich voll überzeugt, sonst hätte ich diese nicht so erfolgreich verkauft.

Drittens ist es nicht richtig das ich über 5.Mio Euro pro Jahr verdiene bzw. verdient habe. Mein Einkommen, das ich auch versteuere ist erheblich weniger.

Viertens, es ist unrichtig das Norbert Otto Schmidt mein Freund ist. Ich kenne Herrn Schmidt gut und seit vielen Jahren, das er mehrfach wegen Betruges, Urkundenfälschung usw. verurteilt letztmalig 2003 entzieht sich meiner Kenntnis.

Fünftens, durch meinen Neuanfang bei der Deutschen Lindpark AG
müssen neue Investoren gewonnen und überzeugt werden und frisches Geld in die Firma. Sollte sich dann Gold und Silber gut entwickeln, dann profitieren auch die Anleger. Falls nicht täte mir das sehr leid.

Ihr Tobias Franke, Vorstand der Deutschen Lindpark AG, Köln http://www.lindpark.de