In the year 2000
An underperfoming offensive-minded coach. Embarrassing losses within the division. Dan Snyder getting fed up and firing people. A new, experienced head coach coming in to save the day. Sure, I could be describing last year, but I’m actually talking about the 2000 season, the one I rated as a 9/10 on the soul-crush-o-meter. Last week, I discovered the season “highlights” for that disastrous season on Hulu.com.Watch the full video here.
For those of you who don’t have 21 minutes and 55 seconds to relive the pain, I’ll give you the highlights:
- 00:51 We get our first look of The Norv Face - in this case gazing into the air in frustration.
- 01:01 The first of many press conferences with Dan Snyder introducing a new coach, followed by tons of ironic quotes by Marty Schottenheimer about how he plans to win and build the team into a championship team.
- 01:21: The title of the film: “The Future is Now.” Ooh, boy.
- 01:54: Our first glimpse of Jeff George. A chill just entered the room.
- 03:12: We get Frank Herzog saying “Touchdown, Washington Redskins!” *sniff*
- 03:49: Bruce Smith sacks the Dallas Cowboys’ QB, Randall Cunningham. Wait, what? Randall was on the Cowboys? I absolutely do not remember this.
- 04:38: Hey, Marco Coleman! I do remember yelling “Marco! Coleman!” to no one in particular every time he got a tackle. It was hilarious in the year 2000, I assure you.
- 05:36: The word “salvage” is used for the first time.
- 06:07: Against the Giants the offense “exploded” -- for 16 points. A remarkably low standard, even for the Redskins.
- 06:21: Crap, I forgot Andre Reed was on this team. They also had Irving Fryar that year. I can’t believe they didn’t try to lure Fred Biletnikoff out of retirement.
- 06:39: Highlights the weird OT win against Tampa Bay. The Redskins were up by 10 late in the game, and Shaun King fumbled the ball, picked it back up, and threw a touchdown. To this day, one of the most bizarre and frustrating things I’ve ever seen. The Bucs eventually tied the game sending it to overtime, where...
- 07:53: The ball got punted to Deion Sanders. In 2000, Deion never ran immediately when he got the ball. He would stand there, moving around a little, as though he expected the other team to run past him. However, this time, after the pause, he returned the punt 57 yards to set up the winning kick. My most distinct memory of this season was me yelling “RUN, YOU [EXPLETIVE] [EXPLETIVE]! RUN!” as he finally started getting up the field. Deion averaged just over seven yards a return that year - and that includes that 57-yarder. Maybe my least favorite Redskins free agent signing ever.
- 11;19: “The defense baited Donovan McNabb into making critical mistakes.” Woo-hoo! I mean, ugh.
- 13:45: Highlights of Sam Shade, or as I called him, “Chicka-chicka Sam Shady.” Again, this was hilarious back in those days.
- 19:08: “Having dropped to 7-8, the Redskins...” Wait, what happened? They just skipped four games - why? Oh, yeah, because each loss was more awful than the next and Norv got fired. In an effort to make each season highlight video as upbeat as possible, NFL Films takes creative liberty only rivaled by Stalin’s filmmakers (and I mean this as a compliment). If you watch the 2003 Highlight video, they completely ignore the train wreck that was Steve Spurrier and just talk about how awesome it will be to have Joe Gibbs back. I don’t blame them, but it really ceases to be a year in review if you don’t show any of the actual games.
- 19:53: “Looking back, the lopsided win might be a harbinger of things to come in the 2001 season.” If you mean that they would lose a lot of lopsided games, then yes, I suppose it was.
- 21:30: “The Redskins are poised to unite their glorious past with their promising future.” That sound you just heard was me banging my head on my desk.
| December 30, 2010; 11:53 AM ET
Categories: Jason Woodmansee, Redskins | Tags: Jason Woodmansee, Redskins
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