Mighty Morphin Ashlee Simpson
Remember when Ashlee Simpson was the cute, yet goofy kid sister of full on pin-up girl Jessica? You should. It was only a scant 16 months ago she lip-synced her way into humiliation on "Saturday Night Live", then danced a freakish rag doll jig before walking off stage. (Video)
Still, there was something likeable about the quirky Jan of the Simpson family. She's not a great musician by any stretch of the imagination, but stacked up against what most of her tween audience listens to, she holds her own. She seemed, somehow, more human than her Barbie®-perfect sibling. She wasn't afraid to make fun of herself, as she often did on her two-season MTV reality show. And although it was completely contrived, there was something refreshingly charming about her schoolgirl/punk rock look. Her plaids, black tights, black nail polish and darker-hued hair could not have been further from Jessica's latter day Brigitte Bardot.
Well, in what can only be described as a shocking case of belated family resemblance, Ashlee has apparently become her sister's doppelganger. The deep tan, the kohl-smudged eyes and -- most especially -- the long blond vixen mane. She's always been somewhat of a chameleon, changing hair color and length from week to week, but in her latest incarnation she has officially become a complete clone.
And is that what she really ought to be doing? Is being Jessica really all that? She's in the middle of a very public divorce, being sued by her own clothing label, basically animated a pair of short shorts in "The Dukes of Hazzard," and is currently starring opposite Miss Piggy in a Pizza Hut commercial. Unless she really does turn in a career-boosting performance in the upcoming "Employee of the Month" or "Baywatch" movie Jessica could be in danger of sliding down the same slippery slope Britney Spears is currently navigating.
My advice to Ashlee? Blame the makeover on a bad case of acid reflux, remove those extensions, dance like a spaz and be yourself.
| April 14, 2006; 10:44 AM ET
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