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Celebritology 2.0: July 16, 2006 - July 22, 2006

Essential Celebritology Vacation Reads

Next week, I'll be spending a week at the beach on a self-imposed break from blogging and all current celeb news. We all have to detox, ya know? Five guest bloggers will take turns subbing for me each day of next week. Play nice, they are all fabulous, savvy Celebritologists. (Truth be told, one or two might not harbor the same zeal for the world of celebs, but it can't hurt to look at this menagerie from a different angle. Just smile, nod and know that person will be gone the next day.) Still, I can't be expected to go cold turkey, so I've gathered a few books (and the makings of a pitcher of Mojitos) to take along to occupy the long hours on the sand, near the pool, on the chaise longue. My picks are below. I haven't read them yet, but please share your recommendations for new...

By Liz Kelly  | July 21, 2006; 10:45 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (0)
Categories:  Celebritology 101, Miscellaneous  
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Morning Mix: Fans Petition Beyonce to Re-Shoot Video

Headlines: Fans petition Beyoncé to reshoot "Deja Vu" video... K-Fed hopes to prove himself at Teen Choice Awards... Colin Farrell confronted by woman on "Tonight Show"... Paris Hilton's album set for late August release... Haley Joel Osment in good condition after car crash. Rumor Mill: Lindsay Lohan's Blackberry hacked, points finger at Paris Hilton... Naomi Campbell reportedly arrested after causing disturbance in London... Is Tori Spelling pregnant?... Nicole Richie faints in boutique... Sean Bean and girlfriend fight at Los Angeles hotel... Jude Law and Sienna Miller back together?... OutKast says "No" to Oprah appearance... Heath Ledger may play Joker in next Batman movie... Mischa Barton to join "Desperate Housewives"? Comic-Con: Keep up with all of the latest news coming out of the annual comics convention with this great LA Times blog. Smart Celeb of the Week: Julia Roberts, who is the new pitchwoman for an alternative fuel. Stupid Celeb of...

By Liz Kelly  | July 21, 2006; 8:45 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (0)
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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A Message From You, Britney

Jack Handey Britney Spears. (AP) Britney Spears has done it again, made contact with us via her Web site. This time in the form of a snippet of poetry and her thoughts on wildlife. The short posting has all the nuance of a high school journal entry, reeking of that teen spirit that informed attempts to assert angst-ridden creative individuality (you remember, it preceded the attendant writer's remorse, humiliation and destruction of said journal). It's a pitiful little piece of work. My 14-year-old niece could do better than this while battling a summer cold and text messaging three friends simultaneously. If we factor in Britney's other recent gaffes, like a somewhat disjointed interview with Matt Lauer, an abrupt switch to the dark side and a Demi-copying nude magazine cover, one is forced to wonder -- where is Britney's publicist/manager and why isn't this person doing his job? Still, in...

By Liz Kelly  | July 20, 2006; 10:44 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (0)
Categories:  Britney Spears, Celebrities  
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Paris Hilton: 'I Like to Pretend I'm Stupid'

Headlines: Paris Hilton says she just pretends she's stupid; plans to one-up sister Nicky with her own line of hotels... Maddox Jolie-Pitt tops list of Cutest Hollywood Kids... Timberlake tells magazine he was "infatuated" with Britney; says iPods are too much work... Jessica Biel's charity auction date raises $30,000... Kate Hudson wins libel case against tabloid that said she had an eating disorder... Dave Navarro discusses split with Electra on his blog... Fred Durst announces upcoming wedding on MySpace... Brigitte Bardot "ashamed to be French"... Ex-Village People cop faces jail sentence... Yes, this is Ashlee Simpson... Stars in Cars: Arkansas to pardon Keith Richards for 31-year-old traffic violation... Mindy McCready found not guilty in DUI trial... Daniel Baldwin crashes Thunderbird into two parked cars... Rumor Mill: Bobby Brown denies split with Whitney Houston (and that he was looking for a "new tenderoni")... Britney Spears holing up in Beverly Hills hotel;...

By Liz Kelly  | July 20, 2006; 8:45 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (17)
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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Who's in Your Backseat?

As we continue the documentation of bizarre celebrity superlatives, this one certainly deserves a mention: Hollywood "It" duo Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie recently topped an poll asking participants to name who they'd most like as "cycle pillion passengers." Come again? pil·lion (pil'yen) n. 1. A pad or cushion for an extra rider behind the saddle on a horse or motorcycle. -- American Heritage Dictionary Oh. The criteria for a desirable passenger aren't enumerated (Relative weight? Groping potential? Likelihood for stalkerazzi chase? Has own helmet? New parent?), but Brangelina apparently beat out several other celebs, including Ewan McGregor, George Clooney, David Beckham, Robbie Williams and Johnny Depp. The survey, conducted by the U.K's Motorcycle Industry Association, coincides with the group's "National Motorcycle Week" campaign, which they hope will raise awareness about motorcycle safety. A word to the wise: Riding a motorcycle with Brad Pitt on the back could quite possibly...

By Liz Kelly  | July 19, 2006; 10:42 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (0)
Categories:  Celebrities  
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Morning Mix: Anderson to Marry Kid Rock

Headlines: Pam Anderson and Kid Rock to marry... Tabloid retracts Britney/K-Fed divorce stories... "Bridget Jones" author Helen Fielding has baby... Teen details alleged affair with Christie Brinkley's husband... John Cusack gets restraining order against alleged stalker... Matthew McConaughey auctions car for charity... Gene Simmons reality show to debut Aug. 7... Fans to create new Janet Jackson album covers... Macaulay Culkin flees Israel, star chef Anthony Bourdain stuck in Lebanon. Rumor Mill: TomKat friend Leah Remini says she's seen Suri (build your own TomKitten here)... Jack Nicholson and Lara Flynn Boyle back together?... Lindsay Lohan says she looks like Marilyn Monroe. Must Read: Brad Pitt, Forcing Us to Volunteer (Post, July 19): If Brad Pitt were having the standard response to fatherhood, then he would be playing Superman in "Superman Returns," for $22 million minimum and a percentage on the back end, not being Superman, not handing out $2 million to...

By Liz Kelly  | July 19, 2006; 8:42 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (0)
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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Dear Jen: Admit It Already

Jen and her "great" friend Vince. (AP) Dear Jen, As my readers know, it's been some time since I've resorted to composing a public letter to a celebrity. It's kind of a contrived, goofy format and not nearly as funny or informative as I had hoped. Still, I think it's the best method of delivering for the following plea. Stop playing dumb. Maybe it worked for Rachel, but not for you, baby. Since this letter is public, I'll just include what it is you've done to force me into writing this missive: In an interview Monday on British TV, you again refused to directly characterize your relationship with "Break-Up" co-star Vince Vaughn. When asked, you went so far as to flippantly reply "Where did you hear that?" and praise him using three consecutive "greats": "Listen, he's a great man, he's a great friend, he's a great actor and so...

By Liz Kelly  | July 18, 2006; 10:42 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (52)
Categories:  Celebrities  
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Morning Mix: Carmen Electra, Dave Navarro Split

Headlines: Carmen Electra, Dave Navarro splitting... K-Fed booked for live performance at Teen Choice Awards... Kellie Pickler lands record deal... Michelle Pfeiffer signs on to "Hairspray" remake (any more "Grease" franchise alums wanna step up?)... Mike Hammer scribe Mickey Spillane dies... Assault charges against Eminem dropped... Michael Jackson's pet name for Macaulay Culkin: Doo Doo Head... What is up with Carson Daly? Rumor Mill: Rampaging supermodel Naomi Campbell trashes boyfriend's yacht... Teen may sue Christie Brinkley's estranged husband... Nicole Kidman denies pregnancy rumors... Paris Hilton likens herself to Princess Diana; reignites feud with Lindsay Lohan... Tori Spelling to join Usher in "Chicago"?... Nelly Furtado discusses her attraction to women... Paul McCartney hires top divorce lawyer... Rod Stewart spends £6,000 a year on his hair... Dan Quayle walks out of John Mellencamp performance. Video: A Syd Barrett-fronted Pink Floyd performs "Astronomy Domine" in 1967. (via Papermag)...

By Liz Kelly  | July 18, 2006; 8:23 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (0)
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Oprah: I'm Not Gay

Winfrey and King. (AP) Oprah Winfrey and best friend Gayle King address rumors about their close relationship in the August issue of O Magazine, denying they are gay: "I understand why people think we're gay," Winfrey says. "There isn't a definition in our culture for this kind of bond between women. So I get why people have to label it -- how can you be this close without it being sexual?" King goes on to say that they would not hide a gay relationship if one existed. One more mystery solved. No word yet on why Winfrey keeps foisting King on a public that clearly ain't interested....

By Liz Kelly  | July 17, 2006; 2:57 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (0)
Categories:  Celebrities, Oprah Winfrey  
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Comment Box: Not Wussy Enough by Half

The response to Blender magazine's list of "Wussiest Rock Acts" and "Wussiest Songs" -- linked to here last Friday -- inspired a quick and heated reaction from perceptive Celebritology readers, who clearly know wuss rock when they see it and they did not see it reflected in Blender's list: "...Peter Frampton anyone? The Sgt. Pepper movie should have convinced everyone, including Peter himself that he's a wuss And what about the BeeGees?? I don't consider them "rockers" but they seem to... so I think it's perfectly fair to put them at the top of list (actually, perhaps the whole cast of the Sgt. Pepper movie should just be #1)?" -- BB Not only did they leave off Michael Bolton, they left off Kenny G and Barry Manilow (Mannillow?). How can 'Mandy' not be the wussiest song. -- Tiff "What? A list of all-time wuss rockers that doesn't even INCLUDE Journey?...

By Liz Kelly  | July 17, 2006; 10:31 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (8)
Categories:  Comment Box  
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Morning Mix: Aniston Hints at 'Friends' Reunion

Headlines: Jennifer Aniston hints at "Friends" reunion... Denise Richards extends Charlie Sheen restraining order, sells home near former friend Heather Locklear's... Justin Timberlake discusses drug use, Britney... Jessica Biel auctions date with herself... Everyone wins loses wins in latest Michael Jackson case. Rumor Mill: Eminem accused of assaulting man in strip club... Tom Cruise sends private jet to pick up groceries... Avril Lavigne marries Sum 41 frontman Deryck Whibley... Eddie Murphy marrying Spice Girl Mel B?... Marilyn Manson says no to "Osbourne-ish" reality show... Daniel Craig signs on for second Bond film. Lindsay Says: "Do you freak when you break out overnight?" Thus begins the new LL Proactiv commercial. Happy birthday to... David Hasselhoff (1952)....

By Liz Kelly  | July 17, 2006; 8:40 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (0)
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