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Posted at 10:43 AM ET, 11/16/2006

TomKat Wedding: Believe the Hype

By Liz Kelly

Tom Cruise, Katie Holmes and Suri Cruise in Rome on Wednesday. (AP)

And so the circle of life continues to turn. Make way Britney and Kevin, we must now shove the wasteland of your dying marriage aside to make room for the pomp, circumstance and overblown hype that herald the union of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes.

As Celebritologists, we too have a vested interest in this marriage. We will be bold with snap judgments about Katie's dress. We'll speculate about the relative merits of her going barefoot or Tom standing on a box. We'll wonder if L. Ron Hubbard's cryogenic chamber has been shipped special to Italy to witness the commingling of Scientology royalty (like Dan Snyder and J.Lo) or if he'll only be there in spirit (like Oprah).

Before we I get too carried away (because I have to tell you, I was headed for an inevitable comparison with the "Beetlejuice" wedding scene), let's ground our expectations in a little reality.

A Bracciano shopkeeper adjusts a portrait of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes in her store window. PHOTO GALLERY: Prepping for TomKat (AP)

First, set the scene. Peruse this pre-wedding photo gallery of the (reported) humble wedding site, an the 15th century Castello Orsini-Odescalchi, nestled in the quaint Italian village of Bracciano -- a town so beautiful that Pope Sixtus IV himself rode out the plague there. Perhaps TomKat will have similar luck escaping the paparazzi. (The castle itself has a Web site, but I'm prettily informed that it is "Impossibile visualizzare la pagina.")

Next, block out an hour to spend with editor Theresa DiMasi, who will be online at Noon ET today to answer questions about Scientology nuptials and celebrity weddings in general.

Finally, join Oprah and the rest of the uninvited to toast the happy couple from afar. Or, if you're not in the mood, have a self-satisfied moment hoping this story about Tom being too pudgy for his wedding suit is true.

By Liz Kelly  | November 16, 2006; 10:43 AM ET
Categories:  Celebrities, TomKat  
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