Report Card: TomKat Gets Schooled
How are Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes faring as they approach their five-month anniversary? Celebritology attempts to make sense of Hollywood's most inscrutable relationship by applying the one-size-fits-all high school report card approach. Don't worry TomKat, no pesky standardized testing here, but as my high school guidance counselor would say, perhaps you'd better apply to more than one safety school.
Gone are the days of Tom devouring Katie on international red carpets. Body language says it all, kids, and pix like this speak volumes. Rumors of Tom's micromanagement of Katie's career and her hours-long calls to Victoria Beckham for advice on how to cope with Cruise's controlling ways only add to overall concern.
Aside from the above-mentioned Victoria Beckham, Katie seems to spend most of her time with her credit card and baby Suri. Meanwhile, Tom spends his social time attempting to convert his friends to Scientology; one story has Tom calling the soon-to-be-L.A.-based Beckhams 18 times in one hour in a bid to win them over.
Despite a rocky 2006 (a tepid box office response for "Mission:Impossible III" and a very public separation from Paramount Pictures), Cruise bounced back by landing a sweet gig as honcho of United Artists and has four films currently in varied stages of production. Still, his planned turn as a would-be Hitler assassin has been coolly received by the real life character's family who worry that the film will be used to promote Scientology.
Katie, who hasn't appeared on screen since 2005's "Thank You for Smoking" recently ended her hiatus to sign on to "Mad Money" with Diane Keaton (10 demerits) and Queen Latifah. Still, with Tom's plans to be on set every day, one worries that Katie may not hit the creative stride she started showing in early movies like "The Ice Storm" and "Pieces of April."
Grade: Tom -- B, Katie -- C
Despite being an alien, little Suri Cruise remains one of the cutest babies ever. She'll celebrate her first birthday in eight days and seems to be happy and healthy. Mom and dad may want to ease up on the grooming, though: recent reports have Suri getting coiffed (in the buff) weekly. Both Holmes and Cruise also spend much time with Connor and Isabella, Cruise's children from his previous marriage to Nicole Kidman.
Since Katie hasn't made any public statements recently (though we can't wait for the "Mad Money" press junket), we can't adequately comment on her sanity. Tom, however, recently set off the skeptic radar by promoting his bid to detox 9/11's Ground Zero workers with a Scientology-based regimen "which includes high doses of niacin to release fatty acids into the bloodstream, ingesting cold-pressed oil and sweating off toxins in a sauna set at 140 to 180 degrees for 2 1/2 to five hours a day, with frequent showers." (Source) Cruise will host a $100,000-per-table benefit for the program in New York later this month.
Summary: All newlyweds go through an adjustment period, but Tom and Katie have much work to do in the coming months if they hope to avoid repeat nominations in this year's Celebritology Honors.
| April 10, 2007; 11:23 AM ET
Categories: Celebrities, TomKat
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