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Posted at 7:29 AM ET, 05/ 4/2007

Morning Mix: Could It Be 'Paris in the Pokey' Day?

By Liz Kelly

Headlines: Paris Hilton could face jail time for violating DUI probation... David Hasselhoff asked to be videotaped drunk... Katie Couric is least popular evening news anchor... Queen Elizabeth arrives in Virginia... Don Imus suing CBS for breaking $40 million contract... Felicity Huffman calls co-star Lindsay Lohan "brilliant"... Justin Timberlake bringing concerts back to HBO... Jada Pinkett Smith says Katie Holmes is no prisoner; five out of five high-profile friends agree... Robin Williams says he's been sober for 10 months... Alec Baldwin, Kim Basinger back in court for custody dispute... Victim's husband sues Brandy over fatal crash... Rapper Eve to be charged with drunk driving.

Rumor Mill: Kindergarten kids frightened by "weird man" Bob Dylan... Michelle Rodriguez not quite ready to share about sexuality, despite Curve outing... Rosie O'Donnell already has offers from NBC, CBS... Fan offers underwear to Tobey Maguire... Kirsten Dunst skips premiere to celebrate her birthday... Mandy Moore could replace Dunst in fourth "Spiderman" installment... Liv Tyler joins cast of "Incredible Hulk" remake... Sacha Baron Cohen ("Borat") to play Freddie Mercury... Prince Harry attacked by drunken clubber at London nightclub.

Say What?
"You just feel at ease with Larry. He is a very easy interviewer for me, and I'm sure for everybody." -- You said it, Nancy Reagan.

"We did 24 takes, but they were always too sexual. Finally Liz said, 'F-- you,' and walked out." -- "Simpsons" creator Matt Groening recalls Elizabeth Taylor's cameo as the voice of Maggie Simpson (third item)

Bonus: Freaky gallery of "aged" celebrities.

By Liz Kelly  | May 4, 2007; 7:29 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Celebritology: 'Lost' Dueling Analyses: 'The Brig'
Next: Celebritology 101: TomKat Triage


That "aged celeb" gallery is interesting, but come on, who really expects Paris Hilton to make it to 80?

Posted by: 23112 | May 4, 2007 9:15 AM | Report abuse

Speaking of Aged Celebrities, I am still having trouble dealing with seeing Ally Sheedy on CSI last night. Granted, they deliberately made her look tired and plain, but come on now. The Breakfast Club. St. Elmo's Fire. Hello? If she can't manage to remain eternally young and hot, what hope do the rest of us have?

Posted by: Aimee | May 4, 2007 9:28 AM | Report abuse

What I love best about that Freaky Gallery is the earnest captions.

I personally hope Paris makes it to age 80. It'll be interesting to see what an 80-year-old skank looks like.

Posted by: Margo | May 4, 2007 9:28 AM | Report abuse

I can already picture the scene from the inevitable film, THE PSHAWSKANK REDEMPTION:

Paris Hilton gains access to the penitentiary-wide intercom, barricades herself against the locked-out guards, and causes a gruesome prison riot when she plays "Stars Are Blind" over the prison's sound system.

Posted by: Thor | May 4, 2007 9:36 AM | Report abuse

How dumb is Paris Hilton? Sounds like she got a decent, lenient sentence for her DUI, and she blows it like an idiot by disobeying rules. I guess she must not think they apply to her? Can't she hire a driver and a decent lawyer? If she goes to jail she deserves it not only for her crime, but for being too dumb to follow instructions.

Posted by: POS | May 4, 2007 9:40 AM | Report abuse

I could spend all day looking at Mandy Moore. Especially since she went brunette.

Posted by: 23112 | May 4, 2007 9:43 AM | Report abuse

Aimee, you can't be serious. Ally Sheedy was always incredibly ordinary and with that Rumer Willis-esqe chin, was realllllly hot...if you've never seen hot before.

Posted by: username-invalid | May 4, 2007 9:44 AM | Report abuse

Gosh darn it, that Michelle R. is seriously hot. And, surprisingly articulate. Which makes me think - all the "bins" instead of "beens" - is that her way of keeping it real for generation z?

Posted by: deva | May 4, 2007 9:48 AM | Report abuse

"Her kids _ Connor, Bella, Suri _ are dynamic children and are extremely happy. And her husband is very, very happy."

I feel so sorry for Nicole Kidman. Now her kids are katie's kids? I mean that would be fine and all if weirdo Cruise didn't keep their real mother away from them.

Maybe I read to many rag mags.

Posted by: Irish girl | May 4, 2007 9:50 AM | Report abuse

-Please anyone but Mandy Moore. She cute and nice, but as an actress is about as interesting a wet sponge with no suds (apologies to fans of SpongeBob Squarepants).

-David Hasselhoff is a jerk. Just because Alec Baldwin got press for his bitter divorce and custody battle, Hasselhoff said "hey, what about me." Hasselhoff's true addiction is to the tabloids. I hope he gets kicked out of AA.

Posted by: Lisa1 | May 4, 2007 9:51 AM | Report abuse

And then that other St. Elmo's Fire girl shows up as the mother on Gray's Anatomy. Looking old. I mean, what gives? It seems like the Brat Pack men are aging much better that the chicks. Rob Lowe is still cute. Why? Fewer cigs?

Posted by: Aimee | May 4, 2007 9:51 AM | Report abuse

45 days w/out having to hear or see Paris Hilton??!! Question is, does the judge have the balls to sentence her like he would any other regular citizen.

Posted by: Sharon | May 4, 2007 9:59 AM | Report abuse

That aging celebs thing got it wrong - Donald's toupe will not turn grey!

Posted by: age-less | May 4, 2007 10:08 AM | Report abuse

Paris's big fear is that she will end up facing a judge with no balls at all.

Posted by: Aimee | May 4, 2007 10:11 AM | Report abuse

that "other girl" from st. elmo's fire is mare winningham, and the reason she looks old is because she has about 8 children. seriously. she's a very good actress.

how about felicity huffman raving (mad) about LL? I loved that bill macy gave his own review to the off screen performance of 'la lohan'..."she was very late."

um...m. rodriguez is indeed hot but was she saying yes i'm gay but i'm not going to say it because i fear that i won't get any work or i'll get work but no one will see if because they don't like lesbians? if so, well why didn't she just say that? (and i think she's wrong about that but no one should out anyone else. that's just not right.)

Posted by: methinks | May 4, 2007 10:13 AM | Report abuse

Strange. I always thought Paris would have more of a Joan Rivers look when she got older.

Posted by: BF | May 4, 2007 10:15 AM | Report abuse

blanket apology from methinks for thoughtless comment yesterday about young tin visjnic's name. i should have realized that goran would do better by his kid than to give him some trendy name in honor of a lightweight metal. i was not trying to offend the good folks in croatia or vietnam or wherever else 'tin' is used as a first name. i'm not a xenophobe and love the appropriate use of ethnic names.

Posted by: methinks | May 4, 2007 10:17 AM | Report abuse

Come on, even if Paris made it to 80, don't you think she'd have a lot of work done? Especially with all the partying she'd probably look like that at 40.

Posted by: dym | May 4, 2007 10:23 AM | Report abuse

Methinks it's nice that you apologized to the people that you may have offended, but the names below aren't American, so the person who got on you may want to offer up one as well. :)

Brittany Celtic

Ashlee is old English

Amber is English

Paris is Greek

Posted by: Irish girl | May 4, 2007 10:42 AM | Report abuse

glad you've got my back, irish girl.

Posted by: methinks | May 4, 2007 10:49 AM | Report abuse

While we're on the topic of names:

Apple is actually a very common girl's name in Thailand. There, girls are often named after fruit in English. I know many Apples and a Pear, and have heard of assorted other fruit. No joke.

And Moses is reasonably common if you're Jewish. Gwynny is not, but.

Sorry Gwynth haters...

Posted by: Bogota | May 4, 2007 10:53 AM | Report abuse

No problem, you are not a rude poster, and as an Irish girl I get annoyed when all ethnicities aren't respected. Well, not respected per se, but are blanketed under being an American. Names had to come from somewhere right? I mean didn't everyone read the Greek myths or at the very least see Brad Pitt in Troy?

Posted by: Irish girl | May 4, 2007 10:55 AM | Report abuse

OMG, he DOES look jsut like Freddy Mercury. I think he'll do a great job.

Posted by: Anonymous | May 4, 2007 10:58 AM | Report abuse

Actually, Gwyneth's father was Jewish (the Paltrowiczs were a long line of rabbis) and she considers herself to be Jewish. I'm soooo embarassed that I know this.

Posted by: former washingtonian | May 4, 2007 11:01 AM | Report abuse

Consider the child sex trade Thailand, I won't name my child after a fruit.

Posted by: BK | May 4, 2007 11:06 AM | Report abuse

OMG!! Someone in Hollywood actually listened when I said that Sascha Baron Cohen would make a great Freddie Mercury!!

Where to you think they've hidden the bugs or did the just go for a direct implant ala The Others in Lost?

Posted by: Bored @ work | May 4, 2007 11:34 AM | Report abuse

I was thinking the same thing as BF and dym. Providing that Paris makes it to 80, which I'm betting is a long shot, there is no way she's gonna let the bags show. I see a combination of Joan Rivers and old woman in "Something About Mary". Dr 90210 should be on speed dial.

Is Jade Pinkett Smith Katie Holmes' Scientology handler? When the rumors about the baby came out, Jade had something to say and was adamant that everyone was wrong and now this.

Michelle - love ya babe but you may want to talk to the Terminator 3 chick I think she was the first person to elude to a relationship between you and her.

Posted by: petal | May 4, 2007 12:19 PM | Report abuse

Given that Gwyn is Jewish, that takes care of Moses. I'm still not certain that Apple makes the methinks cut:

"i'm not a xenophobe and love the appropriate use of ethnic names."

If the key word is "appropriate", then Apple may still be "fruity". Or not. Perhaps there's an explanation for that too. Former Washingtonian: do you know of any Thai in her past or her husband's?

Posted by: Bogota | May 4, 2007 12:44 PM | Report abuse

Also agree that Cohen looks JUST LIKE Freddie M. Fred was not an innately attractive hombre, but, God!, was he cool. There was a time before all these Ashleees and Britannays and Jasons, when people were tapped for stage presence and pipes rather than pretty-boy/girl packaging. AND he could write a song.

Posted by: Bogota/an old f*rt | May 4, 2007 12:47 PM | Report abuse

Bogota, what I mean by appropriate is along these lines, your name is rasmussen and you name your kid julio because you think it's so cool. or maybe you name your kid suri because that's what tomkat named their kid and if it's good enough for them...
well, i think the name nels rasmussen might be even cooler.

Posted by: methinks | May 4, 2007 1:04 PM | Report abuse

Ah! Now I feel like we've plunged into Celebrity-like relativism. If appropriate means nothing more than you named your kid what you named your kid, then Suri's fine and so's Tin and Nine or whatever it was George wanted to name his kid on that episode of Seinfeld, and we should all leave them alone.

I mean, personally I agree with that to an extent. It won't be the kids' "fruity" and unique names that mess them up; it'll be their fruity and unique parents/family lives.

Like John Doe of X, even the most ordinary can be extraordinary, if you make it so. The contrary holds true too.

Of course (going against my own argument) I knew a woman with a truely amazing hippy-founded name that made her sound wonderful and exotic. She spent a certain amount of time trying to live up to it, when she was in fact a little ordinay.

So maybe the name won't help those kids. But I continue to think it'll be parenting more than anything else that matters.

Posted by: Bogota | May 4, 2007 1:28 PM | Report abuse

i'm not going to promise i'll never question the "appropriateness" or wisdom of naming a child something unusual (i.e. apple, coco, dweezil, paris, ireland, margeaux, suri, etc.,) but i am aware that they are the parents and can name them whatever they want. i think celebrities often do things, including naming their children, because they want to be cool and different and are used to calling attention to themselves.

Posted by: methinks | May 4, 2007 1:55 PM | Report abuse

And possibly oftener consider their own interests and perks way before they even begin to think about the potential impact on the kids?

Agreed. Emphatically.

Posted by: Bogota | May 4, 2007 2:21 PM | Report abuse

45 days in prison for Paris - could the other inmates not have some appeal under 'cruel and unusual punishment'?

Posted by: mike | May 4, 2007 2:22 PM | Report abuse

I'd love to have the Hilton family adopt a "surrogate Paris" if the real Paris Hilton is sentenced to jail time. I don't think Bai Ling would do any worse in Paris' shoes, she probably drinks less, she's slightly more coherent in interviews, and it would be very entertaining month for both Celebritology and Go Fug Yourself.

Posted by: Ken | May 4, 2007 2:49 PM | Report abuse

Seeing how many kids (even of non-celebrities) are named something thoroughly odd or a normal name is spelled totally weird, I wonder -- is the goal to make their kid stand out or be perceived as unique because of their NAME? I guess they don't know that a unique name does not make a unique person.

Posted by: Oh well | May 4, 2007 3:41 PM | Report abuse

I hate my name. I wish my parents had named me "Bambi". I hear it is based on an old American folk cartoon written by a creepy old man.

Posted by: POS | May 4, 2007 3:48 PM | Report abuse

Regarding the names some celebs give their kids: Salad Fork, Audio Science, Banjo and Pilot Inspecktor. Huh?

Tom Joyner had this thing on weird names once and I kid you not: Mistake and The sun shines over you Washington are two that I recall. Washington is the kid's last name.

Posted by: petal | May 4, 2007 4:12 PM | Report abuse

naming your kid "mistake" is a...well, mistake. i know, that was too easy. what can i say? i made a mistake. no, they did. twice.

Posted by: methinks | May 4, 2007 4:33 PM | Report abuse

I know one of Mia Farrow's kids changed his name as soon as he was old enough ... his given name was Satchel or Purse or Handbag or something totally whacky.

Posted by: C. | May 4, 2007 7:00 PM | Report abuse

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