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Posted at 10:43 AM ET, 07/27/2007

Friday List: Better Off Dead

By Liz Kelly

Go away, little girl. "Lost's" Kate (Evangeline Lilly) and Jack (Matthew Fox). (Photo courtesy ABC)

Sometimes it's okay to hate. Most especially when the hate is directed at a make-believe entity.

When it comes down to it, there are lots of reasons to wish a fictional character dead: He's unlikable; she serves no purpose to the plot; his very existence ruins an otherwise well-told tale or, like a pebble lodged in one's shoe, she's just unbearably annoying. Recognizing this, the staff over at New York Magazine's Culture Vulture blog compiled a list of 10 fictional characters that would be better off dead. Their picks range from alleged movie-ruining wet rags like "Spider-Man's" Kirsten Dunst to "24's" Jack Bauer, who wore out his welcome a day (read: season) ago.

Today, we'll build on this list by compiling our own fictional character death row. Who would you ax (not literally) if you had the chance? Share your picks along with the reasoning that led to your selection(s).

Who would I pick?

"Lost's" Kate. If ever a character has worn out her welcome it is Evangeline Lilly's pert outlaw, who defies logic, endangers her fellow castaways and has made the fatal error of toying with Sawyer's heart. Here's to hoping she joins Charlie (real-life boyfriend Dominic Monaghan) in the scrap heap soon.

Who would you pick? Share below.

One caveat -- reality shows are out. As much as I'd like to see Paris and Nicole, Flavor Flav, Danny Bonaduce and the entire Hogan family bite it -- they are actually real people (I know, I know) and, therefore, not eligible.

By Liz Kelly  | July 27, 2007; 10:43 AM ET
Categories:  Friday Lists  
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Comments

Meredith on Grey's Anatomy... she is the whiniest person in the world. Never before has there been a more unlikable heroine in a TV show.

Posted by: TV Junkie | July 27, 2007 10:52 AM | Report abuse

South Park's Kenny.

Posted by: Mr. Garrison | July 27, 2007 10:53 AM | Report abuse

As far as Lost goes, I'd like to see Jack gone. Then we could have a struggle for that leader spot & which might make for interesting TV & would definitely set up warring factions amongst the Losties.

Posted by: Bored @ work | July 27, 2007 10:57 AM | Report abuse

couldn't agree more, tv junkie, and liz too for that matter. 'kate' is one reason i couldn't get into lost.

i would also add "sam",linda cardinelli's character from ER. she's been a pain from day one of her run there and focusing storylines on her and her stupid kid helped ruin a show which was already teetering on the brink. now the show is so full of ridiculous characters that even the upcoming presence of stanley tucci (and i love me some stanley tucci) will not be enough to save it.

Posted by: methinks | July 27, 2007 10:57 AM | Report abuse

Lana from "Smallville." Talk about whiney and, after all of the attempts on her life/weird stuff that has happened to her, you'd think that she'd get the hint and either move, or enter a protection-program.

Posted by: meh | July 27, 2007 11:01 AM | Report abuse

Amen to the Sam from ER comment. She and her awful son add nothing to the mix and I feel bad for Linda Cardellini.

Sara Sidle from CSI. She used to be interesting, confident, and smart. Now she's a mope.

Posted by: Arlington, Va | July 27, 2007 11:01 AM | Report abuse

This may be wildly unpopular but... Sam, from the LOTR trilogy. Please allow me to qualify that I'm specifically referencing ROTK and his super-sappy lines with Frodo at Mt. Doom. I seriously wanted to slap him.

The books, btw, were soooo much better.

Posted by: sacre bleu | July 27, 2007 11:03 AM | Report abuse

Dawn from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. She served a purpose in the fifth season, but then after that she became a whiny useless teenager when all the other characters were young adults.

Posted by: michael | July 27, 2007 11:08 AM | Report abuse

Wveryone on Wisteria Lane.

Posted by: desperate | July 27, 2007 11:10 AM | Report abuse

I feel the need to state the obvious, but Jar-Jar Binks, anyone?

And at more than one point in the series, I wanted to kill off each of the main characters in Sex and the City. Talk about some whiners...

Posted by: post-it note | July 27, 2007 11:10 AM | Report abuse

Heather, from Jericho. She is simply too unrealistic as Gadget Girl extraordinaire and also has no chemistry with Jake.

Also, Susan from DH. Her storyline is just boring, and I am sick and tired of it. I don't care if she's finally gotten with Mike, can she choke on a cake and give the show a little more edge? Maybe then I'll tune back in.

Posted by: Mason Patriot | July 27, 2007 11:12 AM | Report abuse

add to that all of the siblings on "Brothers and Sisters."

Posted by: desperate too | July 27, 2007 11:12 AM | Report abuse

LJ on PrisonBreak needs to die. And Audrey on 24. Her appearance last season made me retch.

Posted by: laustic | July 27, 2007 11:16 AM | Report abuse

Tracey Morgan's character on 30 Rock. Besides his indie Thomas Jefferson flick, I cringe whenever he's on screen. On such a clever show, do we need a character that irritating and stupid? Also I'm sick of African Americans being portrayed as sassy don't mess with me characters. C'mon.

Posted by: l8yf8 | July 27, 2007 11:17 AM | Report abuse

Johnny Drama on Entourage.

I keep hearing that he's a popular character, and I just. don't. get it. I want to hold his head under water til the bubbles stop.

Posted by: WDC | July 27, 2007 11:17 AM | Report abuse

Tatum O'Neil's character on Rescue Me. I know the character is supposed to be nuts. Is it my imagination, or is she just a bad actress playing who happens to be playing a character who's supposed to be nuts? Also, my heart goes out to the men who write that show. If the women on that show are renditions of their real-life experiences in relationships, it's no wonder the show is the most completely misogynistic show ever written. Don't get me wrong--I still like it. It manages to make me feel like a relatively baggage-free woman.

Posted by: L L L | July 27, 2007 11:20 AM | Report abuse

I know the show is about her, but Meredith Grey on Grey Anatomy is sooooo annoying. How did she get through medical school? She is totally incapable of making an intelligent decision and her self-esteem is so low it doesn't even register. I guarantee that the number of women applying to medical school has decrease because of her. Who wants to spend eight years becoming a doctor only to end up a whiny, befuddled mess.

Posted by: Lisa1 | July 27, 2007 11:20 AM | Report abuse

I agree, Kate's gotta go on Lost. And she should take Jack with her. Annoying self-righteous know-it-all.

Posted by: Melinda | July 27, 2007 11:24 AM | Report abuse

How about a THEME that's got to go? The stupid freaking period music they play on Cold Case. I will watch the first two seconds of the show to see what decade the cold case took place in. If I decide I don't feel like putting up with an hour of pre-war 1930s music, I'll opt for a rerun of American Justice on A&E or something. And that background music is so obnoxiously LOUD on that show. As far as characters, that blonde chick is like fingernails on a chalk board for me.

Posted by: L L L | July 27, 2007 11:24 AM | Report abuse

I always thought I liked you, but now I am questioning that.

Kill off Kate? How dare you... :-)

Posted by: Jeff B | July 27, 2007 11:25 AM | Report abuse

Izzy HAS to go. "Oh, I'm in love with my best friend, who's married to a woman I've never even tried to like and I'm a former swimsuit model and sort-of widow so I should get my best friend because, well, I just should because I'm me."

Blech. Hate her character.

Posted by: Grrr | July 27, 2007 11:28 AM | Report abuse

I'd like to cross the NYC of Sex And The City with the NYC of the Matthew Broderick Godzilla movie and let the big lizard stomp on three of the four SATC chicks. Charlotte, of course, will be away (with me) in the Hamptons being her sexily cute self.

Posted by: 23112 | July 27, 2007 11:29 AM | Report abuse

For the love of God- Put to rest everyone on Jim Belushi's show...the characters have been tired and used up since it first came on 20 years ago.

Posted by: Nielson who? | July 27, 2007 11:32 AM | Report abuse

James from Twin Peaks. Ok, he was necesary at the beginning, but he's a weak-willed stupid teen-angsty character. Also, Riley from Buffy...for much the same reason.

Posted by: Rita | July 27, 2007 11:34 AM | Report abuse

Nellie from "Little House on the Prairie."

Posted by: waaaay back | July 27, 2007 11:37 AM | Report abuse

Rod and Todd Flanders. Have Flanders kill them in a Christian religious sacrificial killing. Then he can go into a rage in diddly-dong-diddly kill him self.

Everybody hates Ned Flanders!
No me gusta Flanders!

Posted by: Your Husband. | July 27, 2007 11:40 AM | Report abuse

Voldemort

Posted by: Harry Potter | July 27, 2007 11:42 AM | Report abuse

Am I the only one who likes Kate? Sure, EL is my not-so-secret girl crush, but still...she's not *that* bad. And she'll kick your ass!

Although I wholeheartedly second both Sam from ER (as if she was good enough for Luka, please!) and Meredith from Grey's Anatomy, my Death Sentence goes to the entire cast of Brothers and Sisters. Holy Christ those people are annoying!

Posted by: Drea | July 27, 2007 11:43 AM | Report abuse

Whatchoo talkin 'bout Willis...You've gotta have a "Nellie" !!

Posted by: No Nellie? | July 27, 2007 11:46 AM | Report abuse

I obviously don't watch near enough tv because I have no idea who most of those people are, but with that said, one show I used to watch was Without A Trace. I stopped watching it when they brought on that Elena person. I've hated her from the very first episode, but the straw was when she hooked up with Danny (hotty) There is no reason for my hate, it could be that weird accent, that Breck Girl hair, I don't know...I just don't like her.

Posted by: st.louis | July 27, 2007 11:53 AM | Report abuse

I'm all for giving Kate a break, just so long as this coming season, the writers turn her around. I started off really liking her character, but she devolved into another chick only concerned with the guy she likes. Get her back to her ass-kicking, intelligent fugitive ways.

Kill off Meredith and McDreamy. Neither one can make up their minds - how did they become doctors again?

Posted by: K | July 27, 2007 11:56 AM | Report abuse

You're getting closer to my hate column, liz...

Posted by: Kate Luvr | July 27, 2007 12:05 PM | Report abuse

The cast of Seventh Heaven. Yes, all of them, even Beverly Mitchell's character.

Posted by: Joseph J. Finn | July 27, 2007 12:06 PM | Report abuse

"Q", appearing in many Star Trek series (TNG, Voyager)...oh, wait, he's omnipotent.

Anyway, I always hated that character and my least favorite episodes are the ones he is in.

Posted by: CJB | July 27, 2007 12:12 PM | Report abuse

My wish came true when Christafuh got whacked by Tony. I hope Ade was watchin from someplace nice up there.

Posted by: Mob Boss | July 27, 2007 12:12 PM | Report abuse

Gaius Baltar on Battlestar Galactica. I liked the character the first couple of seasons, but now the appeal has worn off and he is just annoying.

Besides, they keep killing off interesting women characters (Ellen, Kat, maybe Starbuck), it is about time for a male character to bite it.

Posted by: CJB | July 27, 2007 12:17 PM | Report abuse

1. any character from desperate housewives. gratingly annoying, the lot of them.
2. erica kane from all my children. enough already.
3. horatio kane from csi: miami. what a poseur.
4. the blonde dimwit alex from the same show.
5. brenda from the closer. should be renamed "the loser".

Posted by: frieda406 | July 27, 2007 12:26 PM | Report abuse

Is it sad that I'm trying to think of characters to kill off and I can only think of reality tv shows??? I mean, I get a much greater satisfaction from wanting...wait...liz said its off limits...

*sigh*...back to the drawing board.

Although I do agree..,meridith from "grey's anatomy" makes me scream at the television everytime I watch her.

Posted by: luv this blog | July 27, 2007 12:35 PM | Report abuse

A vociferous second on Meredith of Grey's Anatomy. what a pische.
Also, Christina, Izzie and George from the same show. Had to look up their names as they are too annoying to remember. Christina appears to be constipated with her scrinched up face. And Izzie and George being pantingly hot after one another? Please. He looks as fluffy as a feather bed and she's as dim as a calf, with all apologies going to the calf.

Posted by: janet | July 27, 2007 12:36 PM | Report abuse

ditto on horatio caine from CSI Miami... what a monosyllabic, one-pose portrayal.

i'd also say axe the ME on that show... her perpetually horrified state wears thin. why become an ME if death bothers you?

come to think of it, that show has really jumped the shark. they should go out with a bang and off the whole cast.

Posted by: b | July 27, 2007 12:53 PM | Report abuse

I think of this all the time, so of course I cannot think of anyone!

But I was A-okay when they killed Milo on 24 - super annoying.

Posted by: Betty | July 27, 2007 12:57 PM | Report abuse

What about shows that need the axe?

The extra CSI's: they have the same story lines as the original and the characters are all whiny and pathetic.

The Price is Right: everything on the show looks outdated, if it doesn't get a makeover when Drew Carey starts hosting, it will seem too corny.

Posted by: Anonymous | July 27, 2007 12:58 PM | Report abuse

Andy from "the office"...i'm tired of him. i think the gimmick has been played out. he could just keep floating away in the big fat suit as far as i'm concerned.

Posted by: jcm | July 27, 2007 1:04 PM | Report abuse

I second the Sara Sidle comment. Every line she speaks ends with her voice going up, so it always sounds like she's asking a question. This is a classic chicken-or-the-egg scenario: Is Jorja Fox (the actress) annoyed with the lines she's given, and doesn't put much effort into her performance? Or do the writers dislike her acting so much that they give her as few lines (usually shallow comments) as possible?

Posted by: re: Sara Sidle | July 27, 2007 1:15 PM | Report abuse

I kept hoping Paulie on the Sopranos would get it, but twas not to be.

Posted by: Jersey | July 27, 2007 1:17 PM | Report abuse

Susan from DH (she's horrible, she's whiney, she's annoying, she's children and worst of all, she's simply NOT FUNNY)


Audrey on 24. The most incompetent, incomprehensible pseudo-heroine ever.

Any character played by Julia Roberts ever.

Posted by: Jayne | July 27, 2007 1:21 PM | Report abuse

Susan from DH (she's horrible, she's whiney, she's annoying, she's childish and worst of all, she's simply NOT FUNNY)


Audrey on 24. The most incompetent, incomprehensible pseudo-heroine ever.

Any character played by Julia Roberts ever.

Posted by: Jayne | July 27, 2007 1:21 PM | Report abuse

I second Baltar.

Also: Matt Santos on The West Wing. Before John Spencer's death, I was so hoping that Santos would bite it and Leo would be president. He was so dull, especially when compared to Alan Alda's Arnie Vinick.

And if the cheerleader Claire should die, so should Peter Petrelli. At least her only power is healing; his is "limited" to anything he picks up from others. Lame.

Posted by: myself | July 27, 2007 1:25 PM | Report abuse

scrappy doo

Posted by: m | July 27, 2007 1:26 PM | Report abuse

Yes...i second the vote for scrappy doo - absolutely must go.

Posted by: jcm | July 27, 2007 1:29 PM | Report abuse

Meredith Grey on "Grey's Anatomy." When she was drowning in last season's cliffhanger, I truly, truly hoped she wouldn't make it. Her wimpiness makes me want to hurl (and be taken care of by McDreamy!)

Posted by: Jules | July 27, 2007 1:36 PM | Report abuse

andie mcdowell's character in any movie.

Posted by: g | July 27, 2007 1:40 PM | Report abuse

jcm, totally agree with andy on the office. unfortunately, i work with an 'andy' in real life, so would that violate the reality show ban?

Posted by: m | July 27, 2007 1:44 PM | Report abuse

Sara Sidel on CSI. My niece and I were praying she would be the one kidnapped and would DIE a couple seasons. This year, we are praying Grissom does not find her in time.

Posted by: ep | July 27, 2007 1:49 PM | Report abuse

From the Gilmore Girls, Luke's sister Liz and her incredibly stupid and unfunny husband TJ. What a waste of space.

Posted by: lafred | July 27, 2007 1:50 PM | Report abuse

Marissa from the OC.

She already died, but I cheered when it happened!

Posted by: 20001 | July 27, 2007 2:03 PM | Report abuse

Ugh, that Amy character (Mary Louise Parker) from West Wing. She was whiny, annoying, and always sat like a guy - very unprofessional and unladylike.

Posted by: LV | July 27, 2007 2:10 PM | Report abuse

All of Ben Cartwright's wives!

Posted by: TV Land | July 27, 2007 2:10 PM | Report abuse

Totally second killing Dawn on Buffy after season five, and add killing Connor after season 3.

I don't want Balthar to die, I just want his ego power maniac self resurrected. Balthar in Six's mind is totally hot, sexy, arrogant, in charge and knows it- and that's who I want Balthar to be ALL the time. Kill off the whiny, pathetic loser Balthar.

Posted by: Liz D | July 27, 2007 2:13 PM | Report abuse

Can we bend the rules just a teensy bit and say Paulie Shore?

Posted by: Anonymous | July 27, 2007 2:18 PM | Report abuse

In no particular order:
Peter from Heroes
Baltar from Galactica
Starbuck from Galactica
Bob Costas
Maggie Gavin from Rescue Me
Katie Couric from the CBS Evening News
Rosie O'Donnell from anything she's working on.
Jack Bauer from 24
Micheal from Lost
Kate from Lost
Anyone (maybe everyone) on SNL

Posted by: Kim | July 27, 2007 2:20 PM | Report abuse

hopefully no forensic evidence will be found at the CSI mass grave site

they should foreclose the entire subdivision of DH

hopefully Merideth Grey joins doctors without boarders and gets ebola

Posted by: the 'nap | July 27, 2007 2:31 PM | Report abuse

Simon Cowell. He just makes me angry.

Posted by: Van | July 27, 2007 2:50 PM | Report abuse

A thousand time over, Kate. I would not mind if I could turn on "Lost" and not see her, ever again.

Lois Lane "Smallville". I don't know why but ever since she entered the show I have disliked her immensely. I know she's Superman's love and everything but I can't stand her.

Rebecca and Holly on "Brothers and Sisters". Holly was the mistress and has managed to worm her way into the family and seems offended when she isn't liked. Rebecca the daugther is a home-wrecking liar.

Pez on "Veronica Mars"(although I heard it got cancelled). They could have cancelled the character and kept the show.

Lynn on "Men in Trees". Can't stand her.

The cast of "Las Vegas", yet I keep watching it. I don't know why I watch.

Posted by: petal | July 27, 2007 3:23 PM | Report abuse

Office: Andy makes Dwight seem normal, so I say we keep him, with regular trips away to (anger) management training.

Scrappy Doo: Instead of saying "jumping the shark", I say "adding Scrappy".

Bear Grylls from "Man vs. Wild": This doesn't count as a reality show anymore, since it turns out he stayed in motels at times instead of really being in the wild. Les Stroud is much better.

Posted by: di | July 27, 2007 3:25 PM | Report abuse

i totally agree about paulie on the sopranos... i kept wishing somebody'd take him out and it never happened.

maggie on rescue me doesn't get on my nerves nearly as much as sheila. (i haven't watched any of this season yet because i was getting caught up on last season so there's hope yet.)

Posted by: b | July 27, 2007 3:38 PM | Report abuse

Shows should kill off the idea of adding a younger kid to the cast for "cuteness" factor. I always end up hating them:
1) Olivia on "The Cosby Show"
2) Leo on "Growing Pains"
3) The twins on "7th Heaven"
4) Andy Keaton on "Family Ties"


Posted by: shelflife | July 27, 2007 3:42 PM | Report abuse

CJB - ARE YOU KIDDING ME? KILL OFF Q?!?!?!?! John De Lancie is fantastic and the episode in which he lost his powers and became mortal is the FUNNIEST EPISODE OF TNG EVER! Now, admittedly, his presence in the other shows was unnecessary, but in the later TNG episodes he was always fantastic.

Posted by: Q-tastic | July 27, 2007 4:33 PM | Report abuse

Bear Grylls stays in motels?! I'm so disillusioned. It explains a lot, though. Like how the camera crew can copter off to a nearby Hilton and leave Bear to eat maggots in a cave in Borneo. I was looking forward to the "how they shoot the footage" show like they did for Deadliest Catch.

Posted by: L L L | July 27, 2007 6:10 PM | Report abuse

A long list...

but i'm going to give up just one...
Henrietta 'Meow Meow' Pussycat 'Meow Meow'
she's been holding X the Owl back for far too long

Posted by: Quintilus Varus | July 28, 2007 12:34 AM | Report abuse

Agree with all the Meredith Grey death-wishers. Whiniest character EVER!

Liz, they're not gonna kill off Kate. She was in the flash forward so obviously she survives and makes it off the island along with Jack.

Posted by: Stella | July 28, 2007 1:09 AM | Report abuse

I second Lois Lane. She's way too irritating and I don't know about anyone else but I don't recall many co-eds in college having crow's feet.

Bear Gryllis is a fraud. How much danger could he get into with his camera crew in tow? Les rules!!!

Posted by: Moodring | July 30, 2007 8:24 AM | Report abuse

I second Lois Lane. She's way too irritating and I don't know about anyone else but I don't recall many co-eds in college having crow's feet.

Bear Gryllis is a fraud. How much danger could he get into with his camera crew in tow? Les rules!!!

Posted by: Moodring | July 30, 2007 8:24 AM | Report abuse

First place: Meredith Grey. I hate the way she talks. There's no emotion in her voice and she says everything in short sentences. UGH.

Runner up: Kate. She needs to STOP toying with Sawyers heart. I hope she's pregnant and dies.

Posted by: Anonymous | July 30, 2007 2:40 PM | Report abuse

Harry Potter in a blaze of glory.

Posted by: christine mc | July 30, 2007 4:45 PM | Report abuse

Waste of space includes:

Cousin Oliver from the Brady Bunch
All of the Adam replacements on Bonanza
Danno's replacement on Hawaii Five-O
Tom Cruise in Mission Impossible


Posted by: Sue | July 31, 2007 6:54 PM | Report abuse

Jesus I hated scrappy doo from his first second on screen
Lane girls, Lana is mawkish and Lois is both grating and of the wrong generation
...Bear Grylls is a real person, but even before he was frauded out, I didn't like him, so macho and he took crazy risks, now I know why he's alive..they weren't risks..
Les Stroud has a really, really good show, and he has an enjoyable, human personality....I catch it every chance I get...I used to be a canoe tripper, and his caution and so forth is what you need out there, where a broken arm might mean death...

Women on Bonanza died like red shirts on Star Trek, but in Star Trek they died quickly, it was a weepy slow wait for extermination at the Ponderosa. While you're at it, include that pompous ass Ben Cartwright, too!

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