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Posted at 10:42 AM ET, 08/24/2007

TGIF: Misbehaving Star Malaise

By Liz Kelly

Sorry guys. No Friday List this week. I just couldn't summon the requisite enthusiasm for yet another compilation of the best high school movies (especially one so wrong) or even the lessons learned from '80s-era cartoons (and that's some good listing).

Instead, I find myself utterly worn out by the latest epidemic of celebrity "justice" and continued bad behavior. As evinced by this morning's Mix, Celebritology is little more than a crime blotter these days. Lilo sentenced, Nicole serving a scant 82 minutes, Amy Winehouse queuing up to be the next Anna Nicole Smith. And that's not all. Over the last week we've seen Foxy Brown jailed, Ali Lohan crash a car, Bill Murray on a drunken golf cart ride, Pete Doherty's cat hospitalized for cocaine use and even the utterly staid Bette Midler illegally felling 200 trees on her Hawaiian property.

Meanwhile, Phil Spector's murder trial continues to unfold and, against all odds, O.J. Simpson's account of how he may have murdered his ex-wife is due to hit stores soon. And that ain't all -- EW compiled a collection of other misbehaving stars in this handy gallery.

It's enough to send a Celebritologist into treatment. Maybe there's room for me at Cirque Lodge? A little whitewater rafting and "the nation's finest multi-media indoor ropes and challenge course" could set me back on my feet in no time. I promise to stay well clear of Lilo.


(Getty Images)

The winner of yesterday's inaugural caption contest is... sjcpeach with "Say hello to my little friend!" See the top five entries here.

By Liz Kelly  | August 24, 2007; 10:42 AM ET
Categories:  Miscellaneous  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Morning Mix: Celebritology Crime Blotter
Next: Morning Mix: Owen Wilson Hospitalized


Sounds like Our Hostess needs a little hands-on R&R time at The Spa of Mr. Liz.

Put the boy to work! (You might as well - we've been putting out the rumour that he's no good for anything else.)

Posted by: byoolin | August 24, 2007 10:43 AM | Report abuse

Of all of them, I think I would cut Miss Richie a little slack. She didn't deny the charges or get petulant about it, nor has she continued to act the part of fool since she got busted. She did what the authorities told her to do and didn't even have to be escorted to the jail to do it.

Dohrety and the Lohans have no excuse though. Maybe we should pack the mall into a car with Amy Winehouse and let them lose somewhere way out in Utah where they'll never get back to a road. Shame really. Miss(Mrs.?) Winehosue used to be so hot to.

Posted by: EricS | August 24, 2007 10:49 AM | Report abuse

YAY - I'd like to thank Liz and all of Celebritology. And of course without the FANS i'd be nothing. Thank you!

Posted by: sjcpeach | August 24, 2007 10:55 AM | Report abuse

just don't celebrate your win w/a drinkin' 'n' drivin' coke fest while trying to run down your former personal assistant's mom. i'm pretty sure that would put liz over the top.

Posted by: methinks | August 24, 2007 11:12 AM | Report abuse

Interesting point - I do actually have plans to be in Atlantic City this weekend. Its not Vegas or LA but I'll try to keep away from the police and paparazzi.

Posted by: sjcpeach | August 24, 2007 11:23 AM | Report abuse

I think it was the Bill Murray DUI with golf cart that drove Liz over the top.

Posted by: Lisa1 | August 24, 2007 11:25 AM | Report abuse

do we need to tiptoe and talk sotto voce around liz? i think she started drinking early today...(clears throat) "uh..refresh that martini glass for you, liz??"

Posted by: methinks | August 24, 2007 11:27 AM | Report abuse

Liz, I disagree with you on this one. These ladies serving limited time in jail is not "celebrity treatment" - it's due to overcrowding. This scenario happens time and time again with nonviolent offenders, particularly in California.

As for OJ - that's politics, not celebrity.

Pete Doherty though, is an enigma. How is not in jail? How is he even alive? That is one sick man, my heart goes out to him and all of his loved ones.

Posted by: Noelle | August 24, 2007 11:47 AM | Report abuse

Ali Lohan wrecked a car? Was that posted somewhere?

Posted by: wha? | August 24, 2007 12:29 PM | Report abuse

The scary thing is the year isn't over yet and they seem to be interested in trying to top each other in ridiculous behaviour.

I'm interested in how LiLo didn't get a week or more for running the car into the tree and then hauling tail from the scene.

Also, what is the point of having Richie visit the jail? Doesn't that cost tax payers?

Posted by: petal | August 24, 2007 12:46 PM | Report abuse

Oh and the lessons learned from the 80s era cartoons is funny. However, one smuffet to that many smuffs has always been a lil fishy.

Posted by: petal | August 24, 2007 12:50 PM | Report abuse

Is a smuff kind of like a muff?

Posted by: ol | August 24, 2007 1:00 PM | Report abuse

Caption (or Cation) contest is a great idea, Liz.
I laughed out loud reading about Bill Murray. And I think these "scars" endured by Amy and hub are from sex, not arguments.
On that note, have a nice weekend.

Posted by: POS | August 24, 2007 1:09 PM | Report abuse

We could have done a much better job with the lessons from 80s cartoons - esp since that article is the work of a couple no talent hacks. Everything there is a cribbed pablum version of long running internet commentary - hell i remember the smurf communism diatribes back in my usenet days (had a good 8000 word one myself at one point).

Honestly - i wish journalists like that would crawl back under a rock - or do something slightly more productive with their lives... like scoop ice cream for a living. Maybe they could become paps.

Now - when someone really wants to open up the cartoon can of worms lmk - we can start with a teleological Rei as Lilith (in the Hegelian 'historical process' sense)

Posted by: Quintilus Varus | August 24, 2007 1:18 PM | Report abuse

I know what you can do! Get the DVD set of the 1st Season of Heroes. You'll thank me later.

Posted by: RiverCityRoller | August 24, 2007 1:51 PM | Report abuse

How is Ali Lohan

Posted by: Anonymous | August 24, 2007 2:35 PM | Report abuse

good conversation with adam goldberg this afternoon. i just read the transcript. he sounded remarkably unaffected and intelligent. how refreshing.

Posted by: methinks | August 24, 2007 3:15 PM | Report abuse

I was back at work today for a friggin' PROFESSIONAL DEVELOPMENT DAY (kids come back Monday)... I'm glad I didn't miss anything.

Posted by: Margo | August 24, 2007 7:24 PM | Report abuse

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