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Posted at 12:00 PM ET, 11/ 6/2007

A Decidedly Non-Rosie Outlook

By Liz Kelly

Rosie at an October 'Celebrity Detox' signing. (Getty Images)

When Rosie O'Donnell walked away from "The View" after last spring's serial spat with conservative nemesis Elisabeth Hasselbeck, I cheered. It wasn't so much because I'm a Rosie-hater (though, in the interest of full disclosure, I must admit that I'm not her biggest fan). Rather, it was because she decried the split-screen treatment of the shout-down. She'd had enough, she said. She didn't want to be "Hannity & Colmes," she said. She was tired of it all and wanted to return to the comfort and quiet of her family. Good on her.

But, alas, she lied. Hours (at least in Celebritology time) later, O'Donnell was pushing herself back into the national blather-feuled dialogue by posting pseudo-cryptic blog slams to anyone in arm's reach (Hasselbeck, Barbara Walters). And just a few short months after her abrupt departure from daytime talk, she unleashed her poison pen book, "Celebrity Detox," on an unsuspecting world and, again, one very chagrined Barbara Walters.

O'Donnell once described the book thusly: "If celebrity and fame are truly a drug, can one go back to drinking and sip instead of taking a slug?"

Turns out the answer for Ro is no. She wants to be "Hannity & Colmes" after all. Or at least compete with them. Like a good little megalomaniac -- fearful of the irrelevance that living on her vast fortune would mean -- she just can't stay away. And so we are now threatened with Rosie's return to TV, this time hosting her own show for MSNBC in the 9 p.m. time slot, competing directly with Larry King and her pals, Sean Hannity and Alan Colmes.

But I can't help wishing she'd just drift quietly into semi-retirement; living off her holdings, hosting her yearly cruises, crafting her nightmarish art and tapping away happily on her blog. In short, pursue those avocations where she can be more easily avoided.

That, for me, would be the rosiest outlook of all.

By Liz Kelly  | November 6, 2007; 12:00 PM ET
Categories:  Celebrities, TV  
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