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Posted at 8:36 AM ET, 11/29/2007

Morning Mix: Britney and Paris Top Santa's Naughty List

By Liz Kelly

Spike Lee talks to actor Luigi Lo Cascio while filming "Miracle at St. Anna" in Rome. (Reuters)

Headlines: Britney Spears and Paris Hilton top Santa's naughty list in poll of kids... "Dancing with the Stars" champ Helio Castroneves and fiancee break up... Pregnant Christina Aguilera bares her belly for Marie Claire cover... 50 Cent shows off his blinged-out (and for sale) mansion on MTV "Cribs" (video)... Jennifer Love Hewitt engaged to Scottish actor... Lou Diamond Phillips and wife welcome daughter... Morrissey wants apology from magazine for publishing his seemingly anti-immigration stance... Don Imus returns to radio Monday morning... Olsen twins asking $11.9 million for New York penthouse.

Crime Watch: O.J. Simpson pleads not guilty to robbery of sports memorabilia; will stand trial in April... Lindsay Lohan's deposition to be taped in civil case... Ron Perelman sues ex-wife Ellen Barkin.

Britney Watch: Producer J.R. Rotem says he and Britney Spears are not expecting a child... Brit causes porn shop uproar, shows up 12 hours late for video shoot... Chris Crocker ("Leave Britney Alone!") also spotted at video shoot... K-Fed's credit card declined at electronics store.

Rumor Mill: Paris Hilton wants a baby... Rep denies rumors of a rift between insouciant Gwyneth Paltrow and husband Chris Martin... Police suspect Kim Kardashian's airport theft claim is just a publicity stunt... Carmen Electra to market line of home stripper poles... Owen Wilson dating "Bionic Woman's" Michelle Ryan?

Chat Day: Join me at 2 p.m. ET for this week's hour of Celebritology Live, where no one is denied admittance -- not even Tara Reid.

By Liz Kelly  | November 29, 2007; 8:36 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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I thought Owen Wilson was dating that model that no one has ever heard of - Le Call.

I'm so happy to hear Britney's not having a child. She really needs to learn to take care of herself before she can take care of anyone else.

Posted by: Noelle | November 29, 2007 9:22 AM | Report abuse

"Police suspect Kim Kardashian's airport theft claim is just a publicity stunt."

They're being diplomatic: under NY Penal Law §240.50, "Falsely reporting an a class A misdemeanor." (And if she's done it before, it could be a felony.)

If only there were laws against being semi-famous for no good reason...

Posted by: byoolin | November 29, 2007 9:23 AM | Report abuse

Gwyneth just needs to change her name to The Insouciant Gwyneth Paltrow. It's the only way I think of her now. Or maybe Gwyneth "The Insouciant" Paltrow. Or Gwyneth Insoucizzle Paltrow. Either work for me.

Posted by: SeaTac | November 29, 2007 9:23 AM | Report abuse

It just occurred to me that I know what I want for Christmas:

News that Britney IS pregnant and that she is carrying the child as a surrogate for her former and once-again BFF Paris.

That would be waaaay better than a pony. In fact, it would make ponies obsolete, if not extinct.

Posted by: byoolin | November 29, 2007 9:33 AM | Report abuse

So how many of Details other "Power Players" had their credit cards declined?

Posted by: Power Player My A$$ | November 29, 2007 9:35 AM | Report abuse

For. The. Love. Of. God. Somebody get that wh*re fixed.

Posted by: Anonymous | November 29, 2007 9:38 AM | Report abuse

Liz, you *have* to award "Power Player My A$$" the Comment of the Week.

Posted by: byoolin | November 29, 2007 9:41 AM | Report abuse

Dear anon at 9:36am:
I heart you lots and coffee burns when it comes out my nose while laughing.
Love, PGM

Posted by: PGM | November 29, 2007 9:44 AM | Report abuse

err..rather anon at 9:38. Tears blurring my vision from burnt nose from snorted coffee. My bad.

Posted by: PGM | November 29, 2007 9:46 AM | Report abuse

Byoolin, I believe what you propose would in fact make ponies extinct. Because such an event would obviously herald the End of Days. So, um, I guess be careful what you wish for? Even if you're just being insouciant.

Posted by: ASinMoCo | November 29, 2007 9:56 AM | Report abuse

No, nothing replaces ponies. Not even the new Verizon toys (ya'all have seen that commercial right?)

Yeah, Helio's fiancee dumped him when she saw the way he fawned all over Julianne. Probably never did that to her.

"Out of the mouth of babes" is apropos regarding Twit and Paris.

Posted by: ep | November 29, 2007 9:57 AM | Report abuse

Anon at 9:38-which one are you referring to? I see at least four candidates in this post.

Posted by: ASinMoCo | November 29, 2007 9:58 AM | Report abuse

*shoot. i had my comment all written and learned the site won't allow the word who-ers (if you know what i mean and i think you do.)
that's what i wanted to call owen wilson. if the rumor mill is to be believed, and heaven knows i'd like to believe (claps hands to save tinkerbell), he's been dating anything without male equipment.
*britney: see 9:38
*just seeing gwyneth's name in the mix is like fingers on the blackboard. and i hate her perfume commercial. there's this one moment where i just *know* she wants to break into her phony british accent. grr.
*i for one will not give up my wish for a pony...not for all the babies in china.

Posted by: methinks | November 29, 2007 10:07 AM | Report abuse

Omg. Did anyone read the item about Britney trying on the lingerie in the middle of a store? Is that for real? Could someone please shut her up in her house and not let her out until she's able to behave?

Posted by: h3 | November 29, 2007 10:11 AM | Report abuse

Someone please tell Paris that if the child suddenly disappears, like her many pets, there will be an investigation and far longer jail time. Maybe even a public flogging. Hmmmm, that's a taught.

Granted it is in the rumor mill but why would I want to buy a Carmen Electra stripper pole? Wouldn't it be cheaper to go to the hardware store, buy a pole and put it up myself? I'm on a DIY kick lately and no I'm not promoting stripper poles. Just saying.

Posted by: petal | November 29, 2007 10:17 AM | Report abuse

"Barely Legal" underwear--give me a break! Does Britney really think she is that sexy/racy? Heck, all of us have seen her privates.
What she needs are underpants that say, "Endorsed by Fraternal Order of American Plumbers" or "Exterminators Union Approved" or something.

Posted by: POS | November 29, 2007 10:18 AM | Report abuse

POS, could she be exterminator approved? She's already spawned twice and I'm fairly certain that those panties would not be convering a vermin free zone....

Beyonce is naughty? Admitidly, her schilling of late is really annoying, but that's hardly naughty. And it's not like she goes running around flashing the world or anything...

Posted by: EricS | November 29, 2007 10:27 AM | Report abuse

You must be truly gross to gross-out people who work in a porn shop.

Posted by: Lisa1 | November 29, 2007 10:28 AM | Report abuse

* gwyneth should just drop paltrow and become gwyneth insouciant.

* the panties should say "barely literate."

* there must be ponies. without ponies it surely will be the end of days.

Posted by: b | November 29, 2007 10:46 AM | Report abuse

panties should read "Enter at your own risk"

Posted by: ncmojo | November 29, 2007 10:56 AM | Report abuse

Celebrities... They're Just Like Us!

They throw tantrums and try on tacky underwear in the middle of porn shops, while the other customers flee the scene. They take their own sycophant circus sideshow freaks with them, wherever they go. They show up for work 12 hours late and behave worse than their children. And their credit cards are over limit, on the same day magazines dub them "Power Players."

Posted by: niceFLguy | November 29, 2007 10:58 AM | Report abuse

I've got it!

I don't know if chastity belts were real or that spoof of Robin Hood was on to something well before its time.

The panties should be an ironclad chastity belt. The key to unlock it is hidden in an undisclosed location. By undisclosed I mean one was never made. That solves the problem of Brit getting preggers or going out frequently because it's got to be hard to walk with those suckers on.

Ponies for all of celebritology! Ironclad chastity belts for all the celebs acting the fool!

Posted by: petal | November 29, 2007 11:25 AM | Report abuse

Yes Petal, chastity belts were real:

but I like my idea better.

Posted by: 9:38 | November 29, 2007 11:36 AM | Report abuse

At what age did the rest of us out grow the need to wear panties w/pithy phrases stitched on?

When I visited today I was hoping for more ponies. Instead I've gotten the dry heaves from the mental picture of Britney trying on panties in the middle of the porn shop and a spinning head from the number of people rushing to deny fathering further fruit of Britnye's loins.

Posted by: jes | November 29, 2007 11:46 AM | Report abuse

Maybe labels for Brit's panties could be a "Friday's List." The possiblities are endless!
No Trans Fats
User Friendly
Closed for Maintenance (or We're Always Open!)

Posted by: POS | November 29, 2007 11:51 AM | Report abuse

Hey, I think we're overlooking one very important thing here....Britney was wearing panties!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Anonymous | November 29, 2007 11:56 AM | Report abuse

I kinda like Petal's idea. There's something satisfying about the notion of bimbettes like Britney, Lilo, Paris, Nicole, Tara, Jessica, etc., all running around in keyless chastity belts (not to mention K-Fed, Diddy, Jay-Z, Owen, Kanye, Jacko, 50-Cent, Dick, and the other boneheads).

Trouble is, it wouldn't be long before companies like Prada and Chanel and Vuitton would be marketing lines of designer chastity belts.

Posted by: niceFLguy | November 29, 2007 11:57 AM | Report abuse

niceFLguy -- Now that's hot!

Posted by: pnina | November 29, 2007 12:22 PM | Report abuse

I'm sincerely praying that things work out for Gwyneth and Chris Martin--but mostly because I want her to stay in Britain. (Sorry, I know that's unkind, but her combination of faux European chic and anti-Americanism really frosts me.)

Posted by: sen | November 29, 2007 12:26 PM | Report abuse

Brit's tombstone will read: "At last she sleeps alone".

I really do think Brit is mentally ill. She has absolutely no idea how to behave. Reading about her taking off her underwear (wow, she was actually WEARING some) in the middle of the store and trying on panties that say "Barely Legal"? I literally felt sick. Is she aware she is in her mid-20s with 2 kids and 2 marriages behind her? Um, Brit, your Barely Legal days are so far behind you can't even see them.

And I won't even start on how disturbing I find it that a store sells underwear that says Barely Legal. Has a pedophile become the new must-have accessory?

Posted by: Californian | November 29, 2007 12:47 PM | Report abuse

You know it's great for our collective futures that the kids of today realize how messed up Paris, Britney & LiLo are.

It's also good to know those 3 beat out fictional characters.

Posted by: Bored @ home | November 29, 2007 12:48 PM | Report abuse

Looking at that photo of Spike Lee and the actor next to him, I have a Friday list idea: Male Celebs Who Aren't Short.

Although it might be a very short list (no pun intended).

Spike Lee is miniscule, and the guy next to him is even shorter. Someone posted yesterday that Helio C. is only 5'5". Tom Cruise, well, we know he's tiny. Andy Garcia, Willem Dafoe, Wesley Snipes, I could go on. Vince Vaughn is the only tall male celeb I can think of.

Posted by: Californian | November 29, 2007 12:50 PM | Report abuse

Wait, you're saying Britney pithed her pants?

Posted by: O.L. | November 29, 2007 12:52 PM | Report abuse

Beyonce is naughty? Did I miss something?

Posted by: musicgeek | November 29, 2007 1:01 PM | Report abuse

Californian: James Cromwell is about 8 feet tall. He's the only one that springs to mind, though.

Posted by: tamerlane | November 29, 2007 2:27 PM | Report abuse

Conan O'Brien is way over 6' tall & so is Jason Lee.

In the promo pics for Vanilla Sky they had to do a perspective shot of Lee & Cruise because otherwise Lee towered over him.

For example:

Cruise is closer to the camera. Lee's at least 6'2" & as we all know Cruise is a little person wearing big lifts.

Posted by: Bored @ home | November 29, 2007 2:57 PM | Report abuse

James Cromwell, yes! I remember the episode of The West Wing where he played a former president, and he and Martin Sheen next to one another was interesting.

Tim Robbins is quite tall, I believe. And Will Smith. (We might have a list after all...)

Posted by: Californian | November 29, 2007 3:40 PM | Report abuse

Okay, kids, it's like this: Helio Castroneves is an Indy race car driver. The cockpits of those cars are very tiny and cramped. And since the cars all weigh the same amount, the team with the lighter driver has an advantage (much like jockeys). So the teams recruit smaller drivers and the drivers work out daily and adhere to a very strict diet.

Posted by: niceFLguy | November 29, 2007 3:58 PM | Report abuse

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