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Posted at 10:43 AM ET, 06/ 6/2008

Friday List: Bad Casting Calls

By Liz Kelly

Mickey Rooney as Mr. Yunioshi in 1961's 'Breakfast at Tiffany's.'
Friday List

Since we can't mention Denise Richards too often, we'll use the multi-talented actress/reality show star/mom as a jumping off point for today's Friday List. During last week's Celebritology Live discussion, one commenter bemoaned Richards's unrealistic casting as a nuclear scientist in "The World Is Not Enough." And, after seeing the crazy trash-talking Richards on her new reality show "It's Complicated," well, I have to agree -- nuclear scientist she ain't. Pig farmer, maybe.

Your mission today -- should you choose to accept it -- is to compile a list of filmdom's most groan-worthy casting decisions. Think Kevin Costner struggling to put a little English in his flat Midwestern drawl in "Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves," Demi Moore chewing the scenery as Hester Prynne in "The Scarlet Letter" or -- reaching way back -- Mickey Rooney as a "Japanese" comic foil in "Breakfast at Tiffany's."

Share your picks below. Bonus points for including evidentiary links.

By Liz Kelly  | June 6, 2008; 10:43 AM ET
Categories:  Friday Lists  
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Comments

Andy McDowell in Four Weddings and a Funeral. Actually, Andy McDowell in anything.

Posted by: pockets | June 6, 2008 11:36 AM | Report abuse

Well this isn't the worst, but I just took my kids to see "Speed Racer" and the idea of Susan Sarandon as the mother of a young grade-schooler was stretching the imagination (not to mention her face) just a tiny bit there.

How about Adrian Zmed in "Grease 2"? Actually, how about all the 30+ stars (at least it seemed that way) of that movie? (That's a shout-out to my "G2" peeps here at Celebritology.)

WAIT. I have it. The stars of "Bonfire of the Vanities" -- Tom Hanks as a blond yuppie? Melanie Griffith as his Spanish girlfriend? Bruce Willis as a British journalist? OK, the blond / Spanish / British characteristics were from the book -- it was the casting of those "actors" in the movie version that managed to erase all trace of the original characters. (Bonus: Kim Cattrall as Tom Hanks' "social x-ray" wife. Sca-ry!)

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 11:43 AM | Report abuse

Pains me to say it, but Audrey Hepburn in "My Fair Lady"

Posted by: Joseph J. Finn | June 6, 2008 11:45 AM | Report abuse

Keanu Reeves as Don John the Bastard in Much Ado about Nothing. "...it must not be denied but I am a plain-dealing villain...dude."

Posted by: musicgeek | June 6, 2008 11:46 AM | Report abuse

Pockets, I'll see your Andie McDowell and raise you Theresa Russell (cf. "Black Widow," "Physical Evidence"). Can't act her way out of a seatbelt.

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 11:49 AM | Report abuse

Tom Hanks in the Da Vinci Code. It might just be that when I read the book, I kept seeing Liam Neeson as the main character.

Posted by: michael | June 6, 2008 11:50 AM | Report abuse

Natalie Portman in Star Wars, Episodes I-III. Cringe-worthy.

For that matter, Hayden Christensen in anything.

Posted by: musicgeek | June 6, 2008 11:51 AM | Report abuse

Ooh, I almost forget Hayden Christensen in really just about anything he has ever done.

Posted by: michael | June 6, 2008 11:52 AM | Report abuse

Nick Nolte as Thomas Jefferson in Jefferson in Paris, which no one saw anyway.

Posted by: musicgeek | June 6, 2008 11:52 AM | Report abuse

Kevin Kline (who I really do like in most movies) in French Kiss. Gerard Depardieu was originally cast (an award-winning genuine French actor!), but Kevin ended up with the part; and now it seems he (Kevin) is in production re-making Cyrano de Bergerac - one of Depardieu's most famous roles. Well, I like Kevin Kline; and he may speak French well; but it takes more than familiarity with the language to be believable as a Frenchman.

Posted by: PJ123 | June 6, 2008 11:53 AM | Report abuse

Meryl Streep in "The Bridges of Madison County." Yeah, she's the first actress who comes to mind when I think, "Italian war bride in Iowa."

Posted by: i love her, but... | June 6, 2008 11:53 AM | Report abuse

Hey, wait a minute! I though Hayden Christensen was great in "Life As a House" as was Kevin Kline BTW.

Posted by: BeachGirl | June 6, 2008 11:55 AM | Report abuse

mickey rooney's portrayal in breakfast in tiffany's was not only the result of terrible casting, it was racist. just awful.

Posted by: frieda406 | June 6, 2008 11:56 AM | Report abuse

robert redford in out of africa. too old and not swashbuckling enough.

Posted by: kellyde7 | June 6, 2008 11:58 AM | Report abuse

the big blue (one of my favorites)

rosanna arquette did not belong

as for andy mcdowell, they had her voiced over in 'the legend of tarzan'

Posted by: me | June 6, 2008 12:01 PM | Report abuse

Ok, John Wayne as Genghis Khan.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0049092/

Posted by: michael | June 6, 2008 12:01 PM | Report abuse

ITA with Andie MacDowell in 4 Weddings. She was AWFUL in a great movie. Ditto Tom Hanks, who I adore. Liam Neeson would have been a great choice for The Da Vinci Code.

Posted by: 2Stormy | June 6, 2008 12:03 PM | Report abuse

Speaking of Kevin Kline -- "Princess Caraboo." Yes, he's usually a decent actor, yes, he was married to the star of that movie, Phoebe Cates (BEST casting ever -- look pretty, wear nice clothes, and don't speak).

But between KK in that movie and Laurence Olivier in "A Little Romance," I'm not sure which movie's scenery was more shredded by the time filming ended. Horribly over-the-top, both of them.

(Um, musicgeek, I, um, saw "Jefferson in Paris." Yeah, it was pretty bad.)

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 12:03 PM | Report abuse

David Schwimmer as Captain Sobel in "Band of Brothers." It's hard to lose yourself in the series when every time he's on-screen you're think, "God, you're such an idiot Ross!"

Posted by: wobblie | June 6, 2008 12:03 PM | Report abuse

jar jar binks

the kid who played mitch in 'dazed and confused', he constantly pinches the bridge of his nose for some reason

Posted by: more bad casts | June 6, 2008 12:05 PM | Report abuse

"But between KK in that movie and Laurence Olivier in "A Little Romance," I'm not sure which movie's scenery was more shredded by the time filming ended. Horribly over-the-top, both of them."

Sometimes great actors make a conscious decision to create something out of nothing by going way over the top, which was the case with both of these. The best recent example is Johnny Depp in Pirates of the Caribbean. Can you imagine how unwatchable that would have been if he'd play it straight?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:08 PM | Report abuse

Brad Pitt in a Devil's Own. Not that it was a great movie, but it would have been better with an Irish actor. Actually, I'd have to nominate any American actor who can't quite get an accent down pat.

Posted by: Stuck@Work | June 6, 2008 12:08 PM | Report abuse

Jessica Simpson as Daisy Duke.

Posted by: musicgeek | June 6, 2008 12:08 PM | Report abuse

OOH - Tara Reid as an anthropologist named Aline in Alone in the Dark. From the IMDB plot summary:

"...young genius anthropologist with an incredible memory (and his ex-girlfriend), Aline Cedrac"

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0369226/

I mean, really!

Posted by: Young genius? | June 6, 2008 12:08 PM | Report abuse

I love this question.

Barbra Streisand in the Prince of Tides! I loved that book but Barbra ruined the movie. Yuck.

How about Julie Andrews in that Anne Hathaway movie where she discovers she's a princess? Elderly Julie, the queen/grandmother, attempts to sing, so sad. She should have left us with our memories of her glorious voice in Sound of Music and Mary Poppins.

Jodie Foster in the movie about the really smart kid - she plays a poor single mother who happens to sport a $300 haircut.

Andy Garcia, Sofia Coppola, and Bridget Fonda, who destroyed the Godfather franchise with their horrific acting in Godfather Part 3.

Tom Cruise as The Vampire Lestat and Brad Pitt as his vampire friend. Again, I loved the books, should have stayed away from the theatre - ruined the story for me!

Posted by: new england | June 6, 2008 12:09 PM | Report abuse

Melanie Griffith as a Hasidic Jew in "A Stranger Among Us."

END OF LIST!

Posted by: Bored @ work | June 6, 2008 12:11 PM | Report abuse

Tom Cruise in pretty much everything after Top Gun and Risky Business.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:13 PM | Report abuse

After just watching the most recent BBC version of Sense & Sensibility, I'm gonna have to go with Emma Thompson, Alan Rickman and Hugh Grant of the 1995 version. Though I love these actors, they were way too old to play the charactors. Emma Thompson was 36 playing 19 year old Elinor Dashwood.

Posted by: jake e. poo | June 6, 2008 12:17 PM | Report abuse

most women cast as police detectives.... I'm sure all female cops go chasing after criminals wearing a tank tops, tight pants, high heels and French wrap nails....

Posted by: b | June 6, 2008 12:18 PM | Report abuse

billy zane in titanic - he's a pud

steve the pirate in death at a funeral

tara reid again - van wilder. a journalist???

Posted by: more bored@work | June 6, 2008 12:18 PM | Report abuse

Going way back...John Wayne as Ghengis Khan.

Posted by: lydacole | June 6, 2008 12:19 PM | Report abuse

Bored: Win! Set! Match! Melanie Griffith was HORRIBLE in "A Stranger Among Us!" Stephen Hunter (maybe? one critic) titled his review of that movie, "Lethal Shiksa." My wife and I still laugh about how bad she was. Excellent choice!

Props to the Brad Pitt/"Devil's Own" and Barbra/"Prince of Tides" suggestions too!

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 12:20 PM | Report abuse

anthony hopkins - legends of the fall

napoleon dynamite is always going to be napoleon dynamite

Posted by: border at work | June 6, 2008 12:20 PM | Report abuse

I think this site speaks for itself...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Films_considered_the_worst_ever

I would have to say Mariah Carey in Glitter...
And anything Tom Green is in...I can't stand him...

Posted by: Ohyouknow | June 6, 2008 12:21 PM | Report abuse

This is an old one, but remember Natalie Wood as the black girl who passes for white? Duh.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:21 PM | Report abuse

How about Diane Keaton in. . . .

Posted by: just baiting liz kelly | June 6, 2008 12:21 PM | Report abuse

brad pitt in meet joe black

when he eats the peanut butter. stupid


Posted by: borderer at work | June 6, 2008 12:22 PM | Report abuse

New England: Sofia Coppola definitely makes the Top Ten. I may have posted this before, but the best part of going to see "The Godfather: Part III" was during the end credits when a woman walked by me on her way to the exit and said to her date, "They should've shot her three hours ago."

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 12:24 PM | Report abuse

Michael Caine in The Weather Man. Awful, awful american accent.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:25 PM | Report abuse

Nick Cage in Ghostrider

Posted by: michael | June 6, 2008 12:26 PM | Report abuse

This is an old one, but remember Natalie Wood as the black girl who passes for white? Duh.

Posted by: | June 6, 2008 12:21 PM

How about Wentworth Miller and Anthony Hopkins in the Human Stain as the younger and older black man passing for white?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:27 PM | Report abuse

he is awful when he's not the clumsy guy

like in con air? he is not a tough guy

stick to roles like honeymoon in vegas

Posted by: nick cage | June 6, 2008 12:29 PM | Report abuse

Tom Hanks in Da Vinci Code. Love him, hated this casting and hated his sort of greasy black receding hair.

The whole cast of Cold Mountain- a great book- horrible casting of the movie

And for that matter Renée Zellweger in pretty much anything. But to be slightly fair I will limit it to Cold Mountain and Bridget Jones Diary.

Posted by: mdt | June 6, 2008 12:31 PM | Report abuse

I so agree with the Hayden Christiansen for the Star Wars prequel. As far as I'm concerned, there are only 3 Star Wars movies.

Another one for me is the actress who plays Tom Cruise's wife in The Firm. The movie is on cable enough that every time I catch those 10 minutes snippets it seems just off somehow.


Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:33 PM | Report abuse

OK, it's a terrible movie, but Sean Connery as Spaniard Juan Sanchez Villa-Lobos Ramirez and Christopher Lambert as Scot Conor MacLeod in Highlander. There is a lot to hate about this movie (unless you're into repeated beheadings by sword) but the accents alone are a hoot.

Then again, don't ask Lambert to wrestle with any seatbelts, either.

Posted by: accents | June 6, 2008 12:36 PM | Report abuse

um. this is supposed to be about *miscast* actors, not crap ones...big difference.

That said, since we already covered Americans who can't do accents, I'd say: any Brit actor who's supposed to have a specific regional American accent, and can only manage that weird, generic midwestern one. Really distracting.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:38 PM | Report abuse

Oh come on accents, what's not to love about Sean Connery saying hola in his thick scottish accent?

Posted by: michael | June 6, 2008 12:38 PM | Report abuse

Ditto Tom Hanks in Da Vinci Code and even worse in the upcoming Angels and Demons, where Robert Langdon is supposed to be *younger* than in DVC! Although I pictured Dennis Quaid as Robert Langdon the whole time I was reading the book.

Posted by: miss.lost | June 6, 2008 12:39 PM | Report abuse

I thought of one more
Brad Pitt in Troy

Posted by: mdt | June 6, 2008 12:39 PM | Report abuse

How about Wentworth Miller and Anthony Hopkins in the Human Stain as the younger and older black man passing for white?

Posted by: | June 6, 2008 12:27 PM

Actually, Anthony Hopkins worked. (I have relatives who are like him. Not all mixed people look like Obama, you know. ;))

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:40 PM | Report abuse

Jason Robards as Brutus in the film version of Shakespeare's "Julius Caesar." A great actor, but at the time that movie was made, he was deep into substance abuse and could barely stand upright and mumble in a monotone. I don't know what was more painful - his "performance" or watching the talented actors around him trying to deliver without getting dragged down with him.

Posted by: Doc | June 6, 2008 12:40 PM | Report abuse

Natalie Portman in V for Vendetta. There are times she forgot the character is supposed to be a Brit. It ruined the whole thing for me.

td, I thought the same thing about Susan but I loved Speed Racer.

Posted by: petal | June 6, 2008 12:41 PM | Report abuse

David Carridine (a white guy) as a Chinese Kung Fu dude in Kung Fu. A role created by and made for Bruce Lee.
And yes, after reading the Divinci Code NO ONE pictured Tom Hanks in the lead role.

Posted by: DW | June 6, 2008 12:41 PM | Report abuse

Lots of problems with Troy, the movie. Chief among them: Diane Kruger (who??) as Helen of Troy. She is attractive, yes, but according to the story, Helen was the most beautiful woman IN THE WORLD. Kruger's merely mild attractiveness and wooden acting made her wholly unconvincing as the reason all these men would go to war.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:42 PM | Report abuse

How about U.S. actors doing bad U.S. accents? I spent the first 10 minutes of "The Big Easy" trying to understand a word Dennis Quaid said.

Posted by: n'awlins | June 6, 2008 12:44 PM | Report abuse

Any movie in which a character played by someone other than Wahlberg, Affleck or Damon is supposed to be speaking in a Boston accent. Makes me cringe.

Posted by: new england | June 6, 2008 12:45 PM | Report abuse

I have been trying and tryin to think of who I wanted in Tom Hanks' role in the Da Vinci Code. I thought I had it with Robert Redford, but no! Liam Neeson! Thank you michael!

Posted by: da vince | June 6, 2008 12:45 PM | Report abuse

How about Samuel L. Jackson in "The Red Violin"? I mean, he sucks in everything he's ever been in (especially since all the movies he typically chooses to do suck big time). But in this case he destroyed what could've been an amazing movie.

Posted by: mh | June 6, 2008 12:46 PM | Report abuse

Troy also suffered from a total lack of gods and goddesses. No Judgment of Paris? Isn't that what got that whole hot mess started, as per Homer?

Posted by: musicgeek - totally digressing | June 6, 2008 12:46 PM | Report abuse

Darryl Hannah in Wallstreet

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:48 PM | Report abuse

"...Not all mixed people look like Obama, you know. ;))"

I know, I am much lighter than Obama and I'm not bi-racial, by that I mean both parents are black as are both sets of grandparents, my light color goes back a few generations. Thank you miscgenation.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:51 PM | Report abuse

Michael Gambon as Dumbledore in the latter Harry Potter movies: just so wrong. Totally misreads the character, substituting bluster for depth.

Posted by: Ranger Bob | June 6, 2008 12:53 PM | Report abuse

Keanu Reeves in Constantine was the worst for me. Tim Roth would have killed in that role.

Posted by: Miscast | June 6, 2008 12:53 PM | Report abuse

Troy was horrible simply because Achillies was suppose to be a young teenager and pretty enough to pass as a girl. And that's just the casting problems. While watching I told my husband I would walk out if something they were setting up happened. It did, and I did.

Posted by: MGC | June 6, 2008 12:53 PM | Report abuse

I am going to amend my earlier comment to: Brad Pitt in almost any leading role where he is not a member of an ensemble cast. When he's the only leading man (with the exception of Mr. & Mrs. Smith) I just can't stand him.

Posted by: Stuck@Work | June 6, 2008 12:54 PM | Report abuse

How about the entire cast of Highlander? A frenchman plays a scotsman, a scotsman plays a spaniard?

Posted by: pamsdds | June 6, 2008 12:56 PM | Report abuse

Wait, John Wayne as Ghengis Khan? That's a must see.

I've got to throw in my vote for Sean Connery and Christopher Lambert in Highlander. However, if it's on tv I'm watching.


Posted by: petal | June 6, 2008 12:56 PM | Report abuse

I have to applaud all the Tom Hanks in the DaVinci Code mentions...that's the first thing that came to my mind. I'll throw in Cameron Diaz in Gangs of New York.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 12:58 PM | Report abuse

Being from the south, I was appalled that the casting directors for "Devil's Advocate" couldn't find a more authentic actor to play the role of Kevin Lomax -- smart, southern gentleman who takes a job in the big city only to end up working for the devil (Al Pacino) himself. Keanu Reeve's southern accent was atrocious and his acting was almost comical. I mean, c'mon, are we really supposed to believe that Ted "Theodore" Logan would ever graduate from San Dimas High.

To Keanu's credit, he was *excellently* cast in Bill and Ted.

Posted by: dcgirl | June 6, 2008 1:02 PM | Report abuse

Julia Roberts in "Michael Collins"...couldn't they have found someone, I don't know, Irish?

Posted by: Lady_Jane | June 6, 2008 1:03 PM | Report abuse

About Troy, no matter who they cast as Helen she would not have been beautiful enough. Everyone has different views about beauty, so the MOST BEAUTIFUL woman in the world is in the eye of the beholder, and no one would have measured up for everyone. (my wife is the most beautiful woman in the world to me)

Posted by: dw | June 6, 2008 1:04 PM | Report abuse

How about (I'm ashamed to admit I watched this) C. Thomas Howell in the "soul man" movie?

And, if anyone happened to watch it, Angelina Jolie as the mom in the "Alexander" movie -- with her very strange "I'm talking like a russian (which is the only accent I apparently know how to do -- see A Mighty Heart to know what I mean) accent."

Posted by: boris+natasha | June 6, 2008 1:05 PM | Report abuse

"Touch of Evil" is a great movie but come on -- Charlton Heston as a Mexican?

Posted by: KLeewrite | June 6, 2008 1:08 PM | Report abuse

Speaking of C. Thomas Howell, let's talk about "The Outsiders" for a minute. Now, I love Rob Lowe and Patrick Swayze as much as the next girl, but come on -- aren't these supposed to be relatively tough kids? And you cast the Brat Pack? Actually, I think the only actor who was fairly well cast in that was Matt Dillon.

Posted by: KLeewrite | June 6, 2008 1:10 PM | Report abuse

come on, tell us why you decided to walk out on Troy? Which perversion of the story finally made you snap? Don't worry about spoilers, no one here is going to go out and watch it.

Posted by: to MGC | June 6, 2008 1:12 PM | Report abuse

My top three are definitely:

Susan Sarandon in "Little Women" - someone softer, gentler, warmer & more loving would have been better than the shrill, condescending portrayal by Miss Sarandon

Katie Holmes in "Batman Begins" - wooden acting and talking from one side of her mouth

Winona Ryder in "Age of Innocence" - not bad in contemporary movies like "Reality Bites", but way out of her league with D-Day and Michelle Pfeiffer in this period piece

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 1:12 PM | Report abuse

Viggo Mortensen as Aragorn in Lord of the Rings -- he was awful, too young, and not tough enough. Daniel Day Lewis would have been much better. Haven't seen it, but why would anyone cast Natalie Portman and Scarlett Johanssen as sisters? Their coloring, build, and ethnicity are totally different. And back to Denise Richards, in Drop Dead Gorgeous -- only person in the whole movie without a Minnesota accent.

Posted by: ack | June 6, 2008 1:15 PM | Report abuse

Speaking of Sean Connery, how about his Russian accent in the Hunt for Red October?
(Though admittedly he pulled it off better than Harrison Ford as a Russian in K-19)

Posted by: Lady_Jane | June 6, 2008 1:16 PM | Report abuse

Spencer Tracey as a Mexican Immigrant(!) in Tortilla Flats

Posted by: cactusflower | June 6, 2008 1:17 PM | Report abuse

(my wife is the most beautiful woman in the world to me)

Posted by: dw | June 6, 2008 1:04 PM

dw is going to have a great weekend!

Posted by: jes | June 6, 2008 1:18 PM | Report abuse

C'mon, how can you hate on Highlander? Oscar-worthy? God no. Hilariously cast? Of course. But there is something utterly endearing about the so-bad-it's-good genre of '80s movies (see also, Road House).

Posted by: musicgeek | June 6, 2008 1:21 PM | Report abuse

I can't say who should have been cast, bun Kirsten Dunst in Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind was just not right. Nothing I can pinpoint exactly, it was just that she didn't quite seem to fit with the rest of the cast, and brought me out of the movie in each scene she was in. I guess it just seemed too forced...

Posted by: DupontCircle | June 6, 2008 1:21 PM | Report abuse

To 12:21: That was not Natalie Wood, dear. The movie was Imitation of Life, and the actress was Susan Kohner. I thought she was quite well cast actually and turned in an amazing performance.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 1:22 PM | Report abuse

Olivia Newton John in Grease. She looked close to 30 (maybe she was?).

Totally agree with Keanu Reeves in The Devil's Advocate.

Posted by: still | June 6, 2008 1:26 PM | Report abuse

Forgot about Stockard Channing in Grease who also looked way too old to be a high school senior.

Posted by: still | June 6, 2008 1:27 PM | Report abuse

4 words for you ladies and gentlemen:


"George Clooney as Batman"


The prosecution rests.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 1:28 PM | Report abuse

Nastassia Kinski as Tess of the D'ubervilles.

I know that all you English majors agree with me on this one!

Posted by: causing Thomas Hardy to spin in his grave | June 6, 2008 1:29 PM | Report abuse

It's tough to miscast in an ANIMATED movie but in Beauty and the Beast, Mrs. Potts was voiced by then 66 year old Angela Lansbury. The character had a young son named chip. This would be fine except for when Mrs. Potts became human, she turned into a 66 year old woman with a very young son.

Amazing what you think about when forced to watch a movie for the 38th time.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 1:30 PM | Report abuse

Shelley Duvall in the Shining. Couldn't even be scared by that movie because she was so ridiculous.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 1:30 PM | Report abuse

Some great actors in totally miscast roles:

Marlon Brando in "Teahouse of the August Moon." Played a wily Japanese interpreter. (Yes, Marlon Brando!).

Sir Anthony Hopkins in "Nixon." His impression of Nixon came off as a brogue suitable for an Irish cop in a vaudeville skit.

Clint Eastwood in "Paint Your Wagon." Clint Eastwood . . . singing . . . 'nuff said.

Woody Allen in any role in the last twenty years where he is the love interest of a twenty-something actress. Pick on someone your own age, grandpa.

Posted by: Louis | June 6, 2008 1:31 PM | Report abuse

Kevin Costner in Robin Hood Prince of Theives. In fact, the entire cast, with the exception of Alan Rickman, in Robin Hood the Prince of Theives.

Posted by: jelo | June 6, 2008 1:32 PM | Report abuse

Bored @ work : Melanie Griffiths wasn't a Hasidic Jew in A Stranger Amongst us, she played a cop.....

Posted by: irish | June 6, 2008 1:34 PM | Report abuse

Kevin Spacey as Lex Luther...

Posted by: AshCash | June 6, 2008 1:34 PM | Report abuse

Having met the real Patch Adams, I am going to have to go with Robin Williams. He is nothing, I repeat, NOTHING like the real Patch Adams. (In personality or appearance)

Oh, and Julianne Moore in Hannibal. The only role I ever thought she was bad miscast for...otherwise I love her!

Posted by: that's Northern Virginia not NoVa | June 6, 2008 1:34 PM | Report abuse

Agree with most the comments about literary adaptations, e.g., Bonfire of the Vanities, Cold Mountain, Tess of the D'urbervilles and add:

Robert Redford as the Great Gatsby -- he played the role as a patrician blue blood when the novel called for a wannabe patrician blue blood.

Posted by: 44west | June 6, 2008 1:36 PM | Report abuse

Any western where the Indians had blue eyes and were whiter than the Cowboys. Also any western set in Texas that had NO hispanics to be seen.

Posted by: ep | June 6, 2008 1:36 PM | Report abuse

Ron Jeremey in the film The Chase in which he has a small cameo as a news cameraman. Excuse me??? Ron Jeremy behind the camera?

Posted by: Professor Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 1:38 PM | Report abuse

Speaking of the Age of Innocence, Michelle Pfeiffer. The perfect casting for that movie would have been Daniel Day-Lewis with Madeleine Stowe (instead of Pfeiffer) and Uma Thurman (instead of Ryder).

Second on Cameron Diaz in Gangs of New York.

Barbra Streisand in Yentl - too old for the part.

Julia Roberts in Mary Reilly.

Nicole Kidman in Cold Mountain.

Posted by: Arlington, VA | June 6, 2008 1:38 PM | Report abuse

Martin Sheen in "Gettysburg" -- I can see anyone following his version of Lee into a bar much less into battle. (of course, much of Gettysburg was pretty badly miscast -- although there were a few good choices).

Robin Williams in just about everything -- he can be a brilliant actor (when he listens to the director), but usually he doesn't bother.

I flat out don't like Nicole Kidman, but I'll have to concede when she's playing a "bad girl" she's brilliant -- of course, that's almost never, and she's miscast (and boring as hell) in any other roll.

Posted by: Gretchen | June 6, 2008 1:40 PM | Report abuse

I seem to be hating on Tom Hanks today, but he should not have been cast in Charlie Wilson's War. Even Charlie Wilson said he was miscast.

Posted by: michael | June 6, 2008 1:41 PM | Report abuse

How about Kevin Spacey casting himself as Bobby Darin, when he was already older than Darin was when he died? (and he played him in the movie as a young man, too)

The movie was Beyond the Sea.

Posted by: CJB | June 6, 2008 1:42 PM | Report abuse

Michael Caine in "Hurry Sundown"...if you think his American accent is bad, try listening to his attempt at a southern drawl...Love most of his work, but this is truly embarrassing...

Posted by: ncmojo | June 6, 2008 1:44 PM | Report abuse

Jennifer Aniston in ... everything thing. She's Rachel in everything she's in. In fact, I went to check out her oeuvre in IMDB and started typing "Rachel Aniston."

"Friends with Money" starring Rachel Green!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 1:44 PM | Report abuse

Good one, 1:38. Nicole Kidman's terrible accent in the "Cold Mountain" trailor was enough to keep me from watching the movie at all. "Come back to me. Come back to Cold Mountain." Her patronizing southern accent made me want to puke.

Posted by: dcgirl | June 6, 2008 1:44 PM | Report abuse

Um, my apologies. Ignore that extra "thing" in my post. :-)

Posted by: Anoymous | June 6, 2008 1:46 PM | Report abuse

dcgirl, Nicole Kidman was bad in Cold Mountain, but not nearly as bad as Jude Law was. He sounded like he had laryngitis. His "accent" was terrible!

Posted by: Lady_Jane | June 6, 2008 1:47 PM | Report abuse

Sorry to hop on board the "Tom Hanks Haters Express", but he was so bad in both the Road to Perdition and The Green Mile. He was not believable as a gangster or as a cop. Actually, he is frequently cast in roles he is not suited for.

See: Catch Me if You Can, The Terminal, and The Ladykillers. Perhaps he should stay away from roles that require accents.

Posted by: DupontCircle | June 6, 2008 1:50 PM | Report abuse

I second Julia Roberts in Mary Reilly. I showed this film to my English students after we read Jekyll and Hyde a few years ago. . .peals of laughter! I can't say I blame them. And Micheal Collins?! I'm sorry, but I think Mystic Pizza/Pretty Woman when I see her. She was pretty good in Ocean's 11 though. . .

Posted by: DBrown | June 6, 2008 1:53 PM | Report abuse

Apologies if previously mentioned. Sean Connery as King Arthur and Richard Gere as Lancelot. What was that movie called, "First Knight?" Really REALLY bad casting to turn King Arthur into a father figure for Guinevere. Bad bad idea.

Posted by: NW DC | June 6, 2008 1:54 PM | Report abuse

Thanks for the tip, Lady_Jane. I can almost give Jude Law a pass because he's pleasant on the eyes, but Nic's botox scares me. lol.

Posted by: dcgirl | June 6, 2008 1:55 PM | Report abuse

Julia Roberts in "Mary Reilly", which admittedly was a pretty forgettable film in general.

But it was clear that was supposed to be her, "I'm not just a pretty face" movie; Roberts plays the plain looking, Irish chambermaid of Dr. Jekyll(john Malkovich).

Her accent fades in and out not just sentence to sentence, but between single words, too. It didn't make it into the trailer, but I particularly love her reading of the line, "There's blood on the ceiling." Hilarious.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0jb87JTGoMg

Posted by: big blue monkey | June 6, 2008 1:57 PM | Report abuse

So, this raises a question....what do people like Tom Hanks in?

I can really only name one movie (Philadelphia) in which he was extraordinary. I liked him in Forrest Gump, but I don't think that he deserved the oscar for that. Bachelor Party was good....

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 1:59 PM | Report abuse

Shelley Duvall in the Shining. Couldn't even be scared by that movie because she was so ridiculous.

Posted by: | June 6, 2008 1:30 PM

I'm going to get all sorts of cr*p over this but how about Jack Nicholson in 'The Shining'? I know just about everyone else considers this a classic but I read the book before seeing the movie & he wasn't even close. Steven Weber played it much better in the TV version.

Posted by: jes | June 6, 2008 1:59 PM | Report abuse

Hugo Weaving as Elrond in "Lord of the Rings". Kept expecting him to address Frodo as, "Mr. Anderson".

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 2:02 PM | Report abuse

So, this raises a question....what do people like Tom Hanks in?

Posted by: | June 6, 2008 1:59 PM

Big. Joe vs. the Volcano.

Posted by: musicgeek | June 6, 2008 2:02 PM | Report abuse

Julianne Moore in "The End of the Affair." That is truly an amazing book, and Ralph Fiennes was good. But didn't get casting a mediocre American as Sara when there are so many good British actresses. Also hated that they changed the ending! Why?
Don't be mad, guys, but also hated Jennefer Ehle in "Pride and Prejudice." At least she was British, though.

Posted by: possum | June 6, 2008 2:03 PM | Report abuse

Natalie Wood (painted oranger than an oompa loompa) in "West Side Story." Guess what? She STILL didn't look Puerto Rican. *Sigh*

BTW, Thanks Liz! This is the best list ever!

Posted by: DupontCircle | June 6, 2008 2:03 PM | Report abuse

Ron Jeremy in Inside Seka. He literally sucked in that role.

As for Tom Hanks, he was pretty good in Apollo 13.

Two words about Jack Nicholson in The Shining:

"Heeeeeeere's Johnny!"

Posted by: Professor Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 2:03 PM | Report abuse

I'll admit to crushing on him back in JHigh - but Keanu Reeves nearly ruins my favorite movie, Dangerous Liasons. Why oh why must he be in this film?

Posted by: RiverCityRoller | June 6, 2008 2:04 PM | Report abuse

Joaquin Phoenix as the emperor or whatever he was in "Gladiator."

"I am vexed. I am horribly vexed." Rolled on the floor at that delivery.

Posted by: Gladiator | June 6, 2008 2:04 PM | Report abuse

Natalie Wood in West Side Story. She couldn't sing, had a terrible Puerto Rican accent.

Posted by: lafred | June 6, 2008 2:05 PM | Report abuse

Oh, also. . .Brando as Sky Masterson in "Guys and Dolls."

Luck be a lady tonight. . .oh lord.

Posted by: DBrown | June 6, 2008 2:05 PM | Report abuse

Oooooooo, "me" at 12:01pm - I love "The Big Blue" too!!! No one remembers that movie! And you are exactly right -- Rosanna Arquette was all wrong!

Posted by: Elise | June 6, 2008 2:07 PM | Report abuse

@1:41 - Where did Charlie Wilson say Hanks was miscast? From what I recall, he thought Hanks did a good job. See http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/Movies/04/23/charlie.wilson/index.html

Posted by: Good Time Charlie | June 6, 2008 2:08 PM | Report abuse

Pretty much none of the leads in West Side Story sang their own songs. I think only George Chakiris...

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 2:10 PM | Report abuse

The same lady sang (dubbed) "West Side Story" and "My Fair Lady." Can't remember her name....anyway, Audrey Hepburn had a fine voice, so it was really dumb that they dubbed her.

Posted by: possum | June 6, 2008 2:10 PM | Report abuse

possum, I think you are thinking of Marnie Nixon. She also sang for Deborah Kerr in the King and I, if I am not mistaken.

Posted by: Lady_Jane | June 6, 2008 2:13 PM | Report abuse

Marni Nixon

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 2:13 PM | Report abuse

Wow, I think most of mine have already been chosen. What about Afleck as a superhero? I can't remember the movie, but I do remember seeing the trailer in a movie theatre and hearing the *very* loud groans when Afleck was finally revealed as the character.

Posted by: Tdot | June 6, 2008 2:15 PM | Report abuse

Sticking strictly to the criteria. I would have to say Janet Jackson in Poetic Justice, never thought she passed for ghetto. Mel Gibson in both Bird on a Wire and Hamlet. My final choice is Glenn Close as Mel Gibson's mother the queen in hamlet.

Posted by: Kmsutton | June 6, 2008 2:16 PM | Report abuse

Ben Affleck as Jack Ryan = nausea

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 2:16 PM | Report abuse

Going waaaaay back, Leslie Howard as Ashley Wilkes in Gone With the Wind - who in their right mind would prefer his Ashley Wilkes over Rhett Butler??

Posted by: lafred | June 6, 2008 2:20 PM | Report abuse

"Troy also suffered from a total lack of gods and goddesses. No Judgment of Paris? Isn't that what got that whole hot mess started, as per Homer?

Posted by: musicgeek - totally digressing | June 6, 2008 12:46 PM"

Homer never mentions the Judgment of Paris. It's debatable whether he even knew the story. But yeah, someone should have been struck by a thunderbolt for deciding to leave the gods out of that story.

Sorry, didn't mean to interrupt the snarkfest. I'll take Keanu Reeves as Don John to block.

Posted by: pip | June 6, 2008 2:21 PM | Report abuse

How could anyone hate Tom Hanks in Bachelor Party or The Money Pit?

Posted by: jelo | June 6, 2008 2:23 PM | Report abuse

Ana Paquin as Rogue in the X-Men Movies.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 2:31 PM | Report abuse

[Scene: The terrace in Rivendell. Elrond confronts Frodo on the nature of the Ring Bearer's quest]

[Elrond] Why, Mr. Anderson? Why do you do it? Why get up? Why keep fighting? Do you believe you're fighting for something? For more that your survival? Can you tell me what it is? Do you even know? Is it freedom? Or truth? Perhaps peace? Yes? No? Could it be for love? Illusions, Mr. Anderson. Vagaries of perception. The temporary constructs of a feeble Middle Earth intellect trying desperately to justify an existence that is without meaning or purpose. And all of them as artificial as Middle Earth itself, although only a human mind could invent something as insipid as love. You must be able to see it, Mr. Anderson. You must know it by now. You can't win. It's pointless to keep fighting. Why, Mr. Anderson? Why? Why do you persist?

[Frodo] Master Elrond, my name is Frodo. Who is this Mister Anderson of which you speak? And I am the Ring Bearer. I must fulfill my quest.

[Elrond] The only verdict is vengeance; a vendetta, held as a votive, not in vain, for the value and veracity of such shall one day vindicate the vigilant and the virtuous. Verily, this vichyssoise of verbiage veers most verbose, so let me simply add that it's my very good honor to meet you and you may call me V.

[Frodo] Master Elrond, what does the V stand for?

[Elrond] Mister Anderson, why do you persist in asking meaningless questions? In Middle Earth, everything is virtual, which means that nothing is real. Strawberry fields, forever.

[Frodo] Master Elrond, must I endure the Matrix to get to the Mountain of Fire? And must I pass through Strawberry Fields?

[Elrond] All will be revealed at the proper time. Tell me, do you like music?

[Frodo] Why, yes, Master Elrond, yes I do.

[Elrond] Then go ask that little wench Evey Hammond, Mister Anderson.

{Frodo] How will I know this wench Evey Hammond, Master Elrond? And why do you keep calling me Mister Anderson?

[Elrond] Your powers of observation continue to serve you well.

[curtain]

Posted by: Sasquatch, filling in for Playwright Byoolin | June 6, 2008 2:32 PM | Report abuse

Oh lord yes. . .Hamlet, the confused teenager played by mid-thirties Mel. Yikes. How about Greer Garson (pushing 40) playing Lizzie Bennett (19ish) in Pride and Prejudice? She's an attractive woman, but jeez. . .

Posted by: DBrown | June 6, 2008 2:32 PM | Report abuse

So, this raises a question....what do people like Tom Hanks in?

Posted by: | June 6, 2008 1:59 PM

Well, anything after Philadelphia, after he began to take himself way too seriously. He is currently probably the most overrated actor. I just can't seem to like any movie with him in it - he just looks haughty and bloated in all of them!

He was good in Big and Philadelphia.

Oh, and it's amazing that almost every good and bad actor of note has been mentioned here and yet no mention of Johnny Depp. Could it be that perhaps he is just too amazing to be miscast? I really just love him to death so there:)

Posted by: misslost | June 6, 2008 2:35 PM | Report abuse

And Tom Hanks was such a believable cop in "Turner and Hooch". The dog was better cast.

Posted by: yellojkt | June 6, 2008 2:37 PM | Report abuse

Henry Fonda as Pierre in the King Vidor 1950s "War and Peace" So bad from a great actor. Yet that film cast Audrey Hepburn as Natasha---so definitive that subsequent versions seemed to mimic that casting.

Posted by: boston | June 6, 2008 2:40 PM | Report abuse

Emmy Rossum in Phantom of the Opera...actually Gerry Butler in Phantom too...interesting takes, but I just didn't buy it (which is a shame because there are several different readings on those roles I've seen and appreciated, just not those).

Posted by: Not sure if this is said yet.... | June 6, 2008 2:40 PM | Report abuse

@ep 1:36 - there was significantly more miscegenation amongst the more western of the native american groups by the mid 1800s than you think - and a lot of blue eyes and red hair from Irish descent. Women in white frontier families were treated as property - whereas in matriarchical native american groups treated as fair equals... a lot of white women ran away from abusive relationships to live with the natives (not that your history describes it that way - we dont really want to hear those truths though)

but enough with the history lesson - Jack Black in Nacho Libre - imagine Jack Lemmon or Daniel Day Lewis in that one for a moment.

Posted by: Quintilus Varus | June 6, 2008 2:41 PM | Report abuse

Hilary Swank in P.S. i love you.

never again should she be in a romantic comedy. She was so bad.

Posted by: Her Teeth Are SO Big | June 6, 2008 2:45 PM | Report abuse

Oh COME ON!

How has no one mentioned Cate Capshaw in Temple of Doom? She was not glamorous or attractive. Totally wrong for the part.

Posted by: Indyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! | June 6, 2008 2:47 PM | Report abuse

1:40 pm: 4 words for you ladies and gentlemen:

"George Clooney as Batman"

The prosecution rests.
========
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it's a shame the prosecutor wasted your precious tax dollars on that weak argument. My rebuttal:

"Michael Keaton as Batman."

Defense rests.

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | June 6, 2008 2:49 PM | Report abuse

What about Keanu Reeves in Bram Stoker's Dracula? That godawful british accent?

Posted by: jake e. poo | June 6, 2008 2:50 PM | Report abuse

As a southern, I am a stickler for southern accents in movies. Nicole Kidman's atrocious accent in "Cold Mountain" has been mentioned and I whole heartedly agree. I would also like to add Cary Elwes' southern accent in "Kiss the Girls". He' so cute, but he can't keep the accent from one sentence to the next.

Posted by: Renee | June 6, 2008 2:52 PM | Report abuse

Juliette Binoche in "Damage." Jeremy Irons has an affair with her, thus destroying his marriage to Miranda Richardson and sending his son (Juliette's fiancé) literally over the edge to his death.

Plus Miranda was incredible (and got an Oscar nomination despite not much screen time), which just made Juliette look even worse. She was just bland and hardly worth the trouble. Terrible casting.

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 2:52 PM | Report abuse

1:40 pm: 4 words for you ladies and gentlemen:

"George Clooney as Batman"

The prosecution rests.
========
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it's a shame the prosecutor wasted your precious tax dollars on that weak argument. My rebuttal:

"Michael Keaton as Batman."

Defense rests.
========

Rebuttal:

Val Kilmer as Batman.

Posted by: petal | June 6, 2008 2:55 PM | Report abuse

The accents are too easy to criticize. It seems like all the actors either over or under-play them. Guys like Damon and Affleck are from the Boston area so they don't struggle.
I saw Dicapprio in Blood Diamond and I could not get past his accent enough to appreciate the movie. It was horrible but then why wouldn't it be?
Rusell Crowe would have been a natural on that note and for good reason.
As far as a pure miscast I have to agree with Jack Nicholson in The Shining. In the movie, Jack Torrance became a brooding character and ultimately believable lunatic who would try to slaughter his famiily. I never pictured him as a guy like Nicholson with those crazed facial expressions (one of Nicholson's specialties)- especially in the "Here's Johnny" scene. However if you never read The Shining then Nicholosn's acting might have worked.

Posted by: Jim | June 6, 2008 2:56 PM | Report abuse

joan crawford as a loving mother in mildred pierce. hahahahahahahahaha. anyone have a hanger?

Posted by: frieda406 | June 6, 2008 2:56 PM | Report abuse

1:40 pm: 4 words for you ladies and gentlemen:

"George Clooney as Batman"

The prosecution rests.
========
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it's a shame the prosecutor wasted your precious tax dollars on that weak argument. My rebuttal:

"Michael Keaton as Batman."

Defense rests.

------------------------------------------

Counsels, your motions are denied.

The court rules in favor of
Val Kilmer as Batman.

This court stands adjouned.

Posted by: Judge Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 2:57 PM | Report abuse

Amen on the Dumbledore call. Totally, totally wrong.

I didn't like Julia Stiles in the Bourne movies...but I've loved her in other things.

Posted by: Sigh | June 6, 2008 2:58 PM | Report abuse

Gee, after reading all this, why does Val Kilmer's Batman suddenly seem like the definitive casting? No snark for him? Or did I miss something?

Especially since he was The Saint" with ANOTHER nuclear physicist beauty -- BEFORE Denise Richards -- Elisabeth Shue!

You haven't lived until you've heard Elisabeth Shue talk cold fusion.

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 2:59 PM | Report abuse


jes,

I do plan on having a great weekend with my beautiful wife. (and she is not even reading this)
And you are right, Steven Weber was great in the TV version of the Shining. I know people will hate me for this but I think Jack Nicholson overacts in ALL of his movies.

Posted by: DW | June 6, 2008 2:59 PM | Report abuse

Indyyyyyyy sez:

"Oh COME ON!How has no one mentioned Cate Capshaw in Temple of Doom? She was not glamorous or attractive. Totally wrong for the part."
---------------------------------------
Ask Mister Capshaw if he gives a sh--.

Posted by: Fuilm Reviewer Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 2:59 PM | Report abuse

1:40 pm: 4 words for you ladies and gentlemen:

"George Clooney as Batman"

The prosecution rests.
========
Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it's a shame the prosecutor wasted your precious tax dollars on that weak argument. My rebuttal:

"Michael Keaton as Batman."

Defense rests.

------------------------------------------

Counsels, your motions are denied.

The court rules in favor of
Val Kilmer as Batman.

This court stands adjouned.
-------------------------------------------

It would seem then that Adam West gets the last laugh.

Posted by: 100% Pure West! | June 6, 2008 3:00 PM | Report abuse

Oops, spoke to soon about Val....

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 3:00 PM | Report abuse

td sez:

"You haven't lived until you've heard Elisabeth Shue talk cold fusion."

------------------------------------------
You haven't died the death of a thousand cuts until you watch The Saint with Val Kilmer and Elisabeth Shue, start to finish.

Posted by: Film Reviewer Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 3:01 PM | Report abuse

Holy bad actors Batman did someone mention Adam West?

Posted by: dw | June 6, 2008 3:02 PM | Report abuse

Indyyyyyyy sez:

"Oh COME ON!How has no one mentioned Cate Capshaw in Temple of Doom? She was not glamorous or attractive. Totally wrong for the part."
---------------------------------------
Ask Mister Capshaw if he gives a sh--.


---------------------------------------

i for one like Stewie's explanation for this in Family Guy: "Lady only here because she ----ing director"

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 3:03 PM | Report abuse

Julia Roberts as a Art History professor in "Mona Lisa Smile", um Not That Believable. Marcia Gay Harden did make a great uptight Home Economics teacher though.

Posted by: peepmonger | June 6, 2008 3:03 PM | Report abuse

Christian Bale IS Batman.

Which is why Katie Holmes was soooo wrong as his love interest.

Posted by: Film Reviewer Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 3:03 PM | Report abuse

Gee, after reading all this, why does Val Kilmer's Batman suddenly seem like the definitive casting? No snark for him? Or did I miss something?

Especially since he was The Saint" with ANOTHER nuclear physicist beauty -- BEFORE Denise Richards -- Elisabeth Shue!

You haven't lived until you've heard Elisabeth Shue talk cold fusion.

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 2:59 PM

What about the scene in the Saint when Val is supposed to be a brooding artist type? And he's reading in the room with the statue. (I know an excellent description of the scene) Arrggghhhhhh, I'd rather watch a documentary on mold than that movie.


Posted by: petal | June 6, 2008 3:07 PM | Report abuse

about julie andrews in the princess movie... she can't sing because of a botched surgery on her throat. maybe she shouldn't have tried to in the movie (never saw it, so i can't say) but it's not due to old age or anything. she actually won a malpractice award because of it.

speaking of bad accents, how about Tony Curtis' Bronx accent in Spartacus...


Posted by: b | June 6, 2008 3:08 PM | Report abuse

Julia Roberts as a Art History professor in "Mona Lisa Smile", um Not That Believable. Marcia Gay Harden did make a great uptight Home Economics teacher though.

Posted by: peepmonger | June 6, 2008 3:03 PM

Christ almighty, don't get me started dissecting this horrendous movie. I couldn't get past the fact that they were marveling at a Jackson Pollock drip painting in a Connecticut barn years after it was installed in the freakin' Betty Parsons Gallery.

Posted by: musicgeek, resident art historian | June 6, 2008 3:10 PM | Report abuse

Wow, I had no idea "The Saint" would prompt such bile. LOVE IT!

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 3:11 PM | Report abuse

All other bad movie accents pale before that of Edward G. Robinson in The Ten Commandments.

Posted by: Film Reviewer Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 3:11 PM | Report abuse

td defends Val Kilmer:

"Wow, I had no idea "The Saint" would prompt such bile. LOVE IT!"

----------------------------------------

The Saint (the movie, not the television show)was so bad, even the CAR sucked. Big time.

And I say that as a former Volvo owner and a big fan of the P1800. The C70 of The Saint was an overpriced piece of....

Posted by: Film Reviewer Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 3:14 PM | Report abuse

Tom Hanks in "Cast Away" . . . "Wilson . . Wilson . . . " died laughing

Posted by: pip | June 6, 2008 3:15 PM | Report abuse

Debra Messing as Mary Magdelene and Jeremy Sesto as Jesus in "Jesus" 1999

Anyone who read "Witches of Eastwick" knows that pretty much the entire cast, but particularly Cher, was miscast in that movie.

Mel Gibson as "Hamlet."

Sting as Feyd-Rautha Harkonnen in "Dune."

Lindsay Lohan and Lily Tomlin in "A Prairie Home Companion"

Robert DeNiro as Archbishop of Peru in "The Bridge of San Luis Rey"

Robert DeNiro in "Stanley and Iris"

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | June 6, 2008 3:15 PM | Report abuse

As much as I adore him, I couldn't handle Ewan McGregor's over-the-top Southern accent in Big Fish.

Considering that Kelly Macdonald knocked it out of the park in No Country for Old Men, his natural thick Scottish accent is no excuse.

Posted by: musicgeek | June 6, 2008 3:15 PM | Report abuse

Agree, no Tom Hanks in Davinci Code. I love Tom in almost anything, but could only see David Ducovney in that role

Posted by: Rachel | June 6, 2008 3:16 PM | Report abuse

Eastwood in Paint Your Wagons and Brando in Guys and Dolls are tough to beat, but Colin Whatever was amazing in that Alexander movie.

Posted by: steve | June 6, 2008 3:17 PM | Report abuse

Thank you a thousand times over, Mr. Sasquatch!!

All afternoon I have in the back of my mind been trying remember Edward G Robinson. I KNEW there was a terribly innapropriately-cast gangster type in a biblical epic, but for some reason all I could think of was The Robe, then as soon as I read your post I had an A - HA moment.

"Meah, Moses! Where's your deliverer now, meah?!"

Posted by: THAT'S IT!! | June 6, 2008 3:17 PM | Report abuse

Clint Eastwood in 'The Bridges of Madison County'

Posted by: adfmay | June 6, 2008 3:18 PM | Report abuse

has great ta tas

watch s.o.b.

Posted by: mary popins | June 6, 2008 3:19 PM | Report abuse

Robert Redford and Dustin Hoffman in All the Presidents Men...WAY too good-looking!

Posted by: b | June 6, 2008 3:19 PM | Report abuse

Re: West Side Story.

Rita Moreno sang her own part.

Random factoid: Marni Nixon, who dubbed Natalie Wood's singing part in the film, is the mother of Andrew Gold, who had hits in the 70's with "Lonely Boy" and "Thank You for Being a Friend" (later, the theme to "The Golden Girls").

Posted by: Krupke | June 6, 2008 3:20 PM | Report abuse

Ok, now that someone has tested the waters and not been shot down (yet) I have to agree with Ewan MacGregor in Big Fish. When he screams "Ah wail murrah ewe!" ( translation: I will marry you) I want to cry. It was simply distracting.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 3:21 PM | Report abuse

Officer Krupke! How's life at Dunkin' Donuts? Been dunkin' Rachael Ray lately?

Posted by: Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 3:22 PM | Report abuse

I am all for Tony Curtis in Spartacus...wow. Jaw droppingly bad casting

Posted by: Silver Spring | June 6, 2008 3:22 PM | Report abuse

MARNI NIXON IS ANDREW GOLD'S MOTHER?! Man, that even beats the Alanis Morrissette / Dave Coulier connection from yesterday.

Andrew Gold was also one of Linda Ronstadt's backup singers.

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 3:24 PM | Report abuse

Elizabeth Taylor was WAY to old to play Amy in Little Women.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 3:25 PM | Report abuse

Edward G. Robinson "The 10 Commandments"

Lucille Ball "Mame"

Barbra Streisand "Hello Dolly"

Tom Cruise in "Eyes Wide Shut" and "The Color of Money"

Al Pacino "Revolution"

Jim Carrey "The Number 23"

Robert Redford "Indecent Proposal"

Julia Roberts "Mary Reilly"

Posted by: Tim Obermiller | June 6, 2008 3:27 PM | Report abuse

"Officer Krupke! How's life at Dunkin' Donuts? Been dunkin' Rachael Ray lately?

Posted by: Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 3:22 PM"

You little wise apple! You want me to run you in?

Posted by: Krupke | June 6, 2008 3:27 PM | Report abuse

Robert DeNiro in "Stanley and Iris"

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | June 6, 2008 3:15 PM
-------

"Teach me to read!" Hee hee. I actually liked that movie the first time I saw it, but it didn't rerun well. I always confuse that movie for some reason with DeNiro/Streep in "Falling in Love" (another corker).

I think those movies were around the time when Bobby -- whoa, I almost typed "Booby"! -- must've had a few kids' tuitions due and just said yes to anything thrown his way.

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 3:28 PM | Report abuse

has great ta tas. watch s.o.b.

Posted by: mary popins | June 6, 2008 3:19 PM
--------

Julie's are real -- and they're spectacular!

Posted by: actually they really are quite impressive | June 6, 2008 3:31 PM | Report abuse

Pretty much everybody in "Peggy Sue Got Married" is miscast...Kathleen Turner in her mid-30s playing an 18 year old, Nic Cage (younger but already balding) with the most bizarre accent ever, and the absolute worst of all: pre-teen Sofia Coppola as Kathleen Turner's younger sister. Not only does she look young enough to be KT's daughter, she also looks like absolutely nothing like the super-bland midwestern caucasians who are supposed to be her family. The only saving grace of the whole movie is the sublime John Barry score.

Posted by: CallMeSkeptical | June 6, 2008 3:31 PM | Report abuse

td, I was totally thinking "Falling in Love" when I typed "Stanley and Iris." Still DeNiro was horrible in both.

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | June 6, 2008 3:33 PM | Report abuse

The entire cast of Love in the Time of Cholera. First its set in Colombia, yet everyone speaks english with bad accents. I really hated to hate this movie, I loved the book and love love love Javier Bardem. Benjamin Bratt was just awful.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 3:35 PM | Report abuse

s.o.b. was hilarious....

saw these on a website:

what about rosie o'donnell as betty in the flintstones? not at all how i would picture betty as a real person.

in jaws, richard dreyfuss (hooper) and lorraine gary (chief's brody's wife) were nothing at all like the characters in the book.

robert shaw, on the other hand was *perfect*

Posted by: b | June 6, 2008 3:39 PM | Report abuse

Some really great candidates. But I think that going back to the studio system Hollywood days is really where the rich material is. I nominate 6' Mexican Ricardo Montalban as Nakamura in Sayonara 1957. So bad ... so bad.

Posted by: SidPhoton | June 6, 2008 3:39 PM | Report abuse

Oh oh oh! "Love in the Time of Cholera" made me think of another Spanish-themed movie (info from IMDb):

TITLE: The House of the Spirits

PLOT: Chile, second half of the 20th century. The poor Esteban marries Clara and they get a daughter, Blanca. Esteban works hard and eventually gets money to buy a hacienda and become a local patriarch. . . .

CAST:
Meryl Streep ... Clara del Valle Trueba
Glenn Close ... Férula Trueba
Jeremy Irons ... Esteban Trueba
Winona Ryder ... Blanca Trueba

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 3:43 PM | Report abuse

suggested recastings:

http://www.worth1000.com/contest.asp?contest_id=16807

Posted by: b | June 6, 2008 3:44 PM | Report abuse

Jodie Foster in Contact. I could believe the scientist role, but her lack of chemistry with Matthew McConaughey made those scenes so uncomfortable.

Another vote for Michael Gambon as Dumbeldore. He plays the character as meek, old, and frightened, hardly what the character is in the books. Richard Harris was perfect, such a sad loss.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 3:44 PM | Report abuse

Natalie Wood actually tried to sing in "Gypsy," which also starred Rosalind Russell trying to sing. Where was Marni Nixon then? That was just painful.

I've never seen "High Society" (tried to once, but it was just too boring). But being a huge fan of "The Philadelphia Story," on which "High Society" was based, I have to ask: That milquetoast Bing Crosby instead of Cary Grant? The insipid Grace Kelly (except in Hitchcock movies) instead of the brilliant, razor-sharp Katharine Hepburn? I don't think so.

Posted by: KLeewrite | June 6, 2008 3:48 PM | Report abuse

Anyone cast as "the fat girl" who is really skinny in real life. for example:
Minnie Driver in Circle of Friends
Renee Zelwegger in Bridget Jones

Speaking of Circle of Friends...what the heck is Chris O'Donnell doing in that one?

Charlie Sheen in The Three Musketeers (I only saw it because I had a HUGE school-girl crush on Chris O'Donnell)

Posted by: PGM | June 6, 2008 3:49 PM | Report abuse

So, this raises a question....what do people like Tom Hanks in?

I liked him in Philadelphia, Forrest Gump, Apollo 13, Toy Story and Polar Express voices, League of their Own (hard to believe who else was in that one!). And Sleepless in Seattle and Big were decent movies IMO.

And Robin Williams was cast well in Mrs. Doubtfire. Sally Field, not so much. And not so much as Forrest's mom in Forest Gump.

And when I see Darryl Hannah, I think Splash (full circle -- Hankes was in that one, too) and Roxanne!

Posted by: WDC 21113 | June 6, 2008 3:49 PM | Report abuse

Another example of racial miscasting: Jennifer Jones in Love is a Many Splendored Thing, as the Asian doctor.

Can't believe no one mentioned that dumb movie in which Tom Cruise is a Samurai warrior.

Speaking of Jennifer Jones, her co-star in a Farewell to Arms, Rock Hudson was miscast his entire career. The war movies are especially painful. Don't ask, don't tell!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 3:49 PM | Report abuse

You want to talk Ricardo Montalban, let's discuss his turn as a former prince of India in Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Khan.

(Ok, so they don't discuss Khan's heritage in the movie, but in the episode it was a sequal to, he is a former Earth-dweller from India)

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 3:53 PM | Report abuse

Gee, Officer Krupke,
We're down on our knees,
'Cause no one wants a fellow with a social disease.
Gee, Officer Krupke,
What are we to do?
Gee, Officer Krupke,
Krup you!

Posted by: West Side Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 3:55 PM | Report abuse

How about...
the entire cast of the movie version of Bewitched.
Also Ethan Hawke in Hamlet.

As for accents... any movie with someone from Alexandria or Arlington Virginia who has a southern accent? And then don't even get me started on how all movie southern accents sound exactly like exactly the same bad versions, no matter where in the south they are supposed to be from.

Posted by: katyd | June 6, 2008 3:55 PM | Report abuse

John Travolta was so out of place in Urban Cowboy. He didn't come across as someone who'd ever even heard of Texas, much less lived there. yikes!

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 3:56 PM | Report abuse

Who can forget Colin Farrell in "Alexander"? He made a clunker of a movie into a stinker.

Posted by: jack | June 6, 2008 3:57 PM | Report abuse

Marlee Matlin was completely unbelievable as a Deaf American in Children of a Lesser God.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 3:57 PM | Report abuse

When you think about it, as brilliant as Dustin Hoffman and Anne Bancroft were in "The Graduate," they were pretty miscast strictly on the basis of age. Hoffman was 30 and playing someone just out of college. Bancroft was 37 and playing a woman old enough to be Hoffman's mother. You do the math.

Posted by: KLeewrite | June 6, 2008 3:58 PM | Report abuse

But Khan's captain's chair did have "reech Coreentheean lay-ther."

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | June 6, 2008 3:58 PM | Report abuse

The guy who played Babe Ruth in Pride of the Yankees was AWFUL

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 3:59 PM | Report abuse

Anon writes:
"You want to talk Ricardo Montalban, let's discuss his turn as a former prince of India in Star Trek 2: The Wrath of Khan.

(Ok, so they don't discuss Khan's heritage in the movie, but in the episode it was a sequal to, he is a former Earth-dweller from India)"
-------------------------------------------
Khan captured the K-Class Starship Reliant. Remember that during this time Ricard was hawking Chrysler products on television. I wonder if Khan's captain's chair was appointed in Rich Corinthian Leather?

Posted by: Sasquatch | June 6, 2008 3:59 PM | Report abuse

Tom Cruise was not a Samurai Warrior, he was a Union soldier asked to train Japanese to fight Samurai warriors. A great movie with fantastic acting by the Japanese star. (Cruise, not so much - but ok)

Posted by: DW | June 6, 2008 3:59 PM | Report abuse

I can't believe no one's mentioned Mr. Hanks superb work in Dragnet with Dan Ackroyd

Posted by: John D in Houston | June 6, 2008 4:00 PM | Report abuse

Rene Russo in anything, but especially the 'Thomas Crown Affair' and 'Tin Cup'.

Posted by: SusCali | June 6, 2008 4:03 PM | Report abuse

Renee Zellweger as an Orthodox Jew in "A Price Above Rubies"

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 4:05 PM | Report abuse

Melanie Griffith has garnered several mentions for her performance as a cop who has to work among the Hasidic community in A Stranger Among Us. Granted, it is truly cringe-worthy--but it is far from the pinnacle of true awfulness that Ms. Griffith is capable of attaining.

I hereby nominate Ms. Griffith as Linda Voss in Shining Through. If anyone even saw this movie, which was an adapatation of a pretty good Susan Isaacs novel, Ms. Griffith plays an American of Jewish descent who gets recruited by her boss, played by Michael Douglas, to work as an undercover spy in Nazi Germany.

Oy vey. It was exactly like Betty Boop trying to pass herself off as a spy. If the fate of the nation had depended on the success of this mission, we'd all be speaking German now. I still remember the hideous scene where Betty Boop was trying to convince her boss that she could pass as a spy so she baked an "authentic" strudel and implored him in her breathy, sex-kitten voice to give it a try. Funny, I've never tried interviewing for a job that way. . .

Posted by: bad betty boop | June 6, 2008 4:10 PM | Report abuse

Another example of racial miscasting: Jennifer Jones in Love is a Many Splendored Thing, as the Asian doctor.

Posted by: | June 6, 2008 3:49 PM

Jones's character, Dr. Han Suyin, was of both European and Asian descent, so I didn't think she was *that* awful.

Posted by: musicgeek | June 6, 2008 4:12 PM | Report abuse

b: I see you Rosie O'Donnell as Betty Rubble in "The Flintstones" and I raise you

Rosie O'Donnell in "Exit to Eden." It was enough to see her in the preview scenes to know she was miscast in the movie.

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | June 6, 2008 4:13 PM | Report abuse

Milla Jovovich as Joan of Arc.

Most of the cast of Last Temptation of Christ. Seriously, Harvey Keitel as one of Jesus' disciples? I get that he was Judas, the guy who turned Jesus in, but before the betrayal on the last night I don't recall any mention in the bible of Judas being a thug with a tough-guy accent.

Zac Efron as the hetero hearthrob in the High School Musical movies.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 4:13 PM | Report abuse

Wentworth Miller is actually multiracial. Not sure he qualifies for being miscast in the Human Stain role.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 4:14 PM | Report abuse

Jodie Foster in Contact. I could believe the scientist role, but her lack of chemistry with Matthew McConaughey made those scenes so uncomfortable.

Posted by: | June 6, 2008 3:44 PM

I agree. But, seriously, I can't think of anyone who does have onscreen chemistry with MM. (Maybe he's just too in love with himself.)

Posted by: MM reminds me of Woody Harrelson | June 6, 2008 4:15 PM | Report abuse

Thank you, anon at 3:59! That was Gary Cooper in "Pride of the Yankees" (an actor I've never liked), and I cannot watch that movie because I get the giggles when I see Cooper, who I think was around 40, try to play a green, eager teenager. Does not compute.

Posted by: KLeewrite | June 6, 2008 4:16 PM | Report abuse

I have to say... I totally LOVE Tom Hanks in "Splash"... just a great movie...

Oh, and how can I forget Johnny Depp as "Willy Wonka" in Charlie in the Chocolate Factory. Tim Burton should have known better than to tamper with perfection... The Gene Wilder version is SO MUCH BETTER!!! Johnny Depp's Willy Wonka was just waaaaaay creepy.

Posted by: peepmonger | June 6, 2008 4:16 PM | Report abuse

John Wayne as Ghengis Kahn in The Conqueror.

http://www.imdb.com/media/rm3164969216/tt0049092

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 4:19 PM | Report abuse

I have to mention Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet as a couple in Titanic. I never really bought the idea of them being realistic together as a couple. They seemed mismatched. Still astonished at how many people went to see it, and how many people said that it was their favorite movie ever. I just didn't get any sizzle from them as a couple.

Posted by: NW DC | June 6, 2008 4:20 PM | Report abuse

i disagree on willy wonka.... Johnny Depp was delightfully creepy....

Posted by: b | June 6, 2008 4:20 PM | Report abuse

Thank you, anon at 3:59! That was Gary Cooper in "Pride of the Yankees" (an actor I've never liked), and I cannot watch that movie because I get the giggles when I see Cooper, who I think was around 40, try to play a green, eager teenager. Does not compute.

Posted by: KLeewrite | June 6, 2008 4:16 PM

--------------------------------------
Umm, I think the original post was a joke or a serious mistake....Gary Cooper Played *Lou Gehrig* in the movie. Babe Ruth was played by...Babe Ruth.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 4:21 PM | Report abuse

Denise Richards in a dream I had the other night. She was very bad.

Matthew Fox (and everybody else) in "Smokin' Aces," except the black chick (can't think of her name), but especially Fox. Jeez.

Lee Marvin in "Paint Your Wagon," although the aforementioned Eastwood was even worse.

Jodie Foster in "Inside Man."

Gotta add the sixth or seventh mention of John Wayne in "Genghis Khan." Surely a top five finalist.

Meryl Streep in the non-musical remake of "South Pacific."

Hillary Swank, Scarlett Johansen and Josh Hartnett in "The Black Dahlia." O. M. G. was that miscast. Even the craft service was miscast.

Repeat mention of Martin Sheen in Gettysburg. Possibly another top five nominee.

Anything Adam Sandler is in, except maybe "Reign Over Me."


Posted by: Curmudgeon | June 6, 2008 4:21 PM | Report abuse

Hey stop with the Natalie Wood bashing! Speaking of accents, her Russian one in "Meteor" is actually pretty good. (Brian Keith's, on the other hand. . . .)

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 4:23 PM | Report abuse

The guy who played Babe Ruth in Pride of the Yankees was AWFUL

Posted by: | June 6, 2008 3:59 PM
______________________________________

Thank you, anon at 3:59! That was Gary Cooper in "Pride of the Yankees" (an actor I've never liked), and I cannot watch that movie because I get the giggles when I see Cooper, who I think was around 40, try to play a green, eager teenager. Does not compute.

Posted by: KLeewrite | June 6, 2008 4:16 PM

He didn't play Babe Ruth, he played Lou Gehrig. Babe Ruth played himself (and here I thought you were trying to be funny first poster!).

I also thought for a minute that you (first poster) got your baseball movies mixed up and were referring to John Goodman in The Babe. Never saw it, so I don't know if it was good casting or not.

Posted by: WDC 21113 | June 6, 2008 4:25 PM | Report abuse

As mentioned earlier (and the movie in question is titled "The Conqueror"), but not just John Wayne as Ghengis Kahn; most all of the casting on that flick is atrocious.

Agnes Morehead (Samantha's mother in the original "Bewitched") as the mother of a Mongol warlord? C'mon.

Susan Hayward as "The Tartar woman?"

There are a lot of reasons that movie was put away for a couple of decades

Posted by: dakine01 | June 6, 2008 4:26 PM | Report abuse

Ah...indeed he did mention Babe Ruth. I just saw the title and just remembered the sorely miscast Cooper. I actually forgot the Babe himself was in it.

Posted by: KLeewrite | June 6, 2008 4:27 PM | Report abuse

"Hey stop with the Natalie Wood bashing! Speaking of accents, her Russian one in "Meteor" is actually pretty good. (Brian Keith's, on the other hand. . . .)

Posted by: td | June 6, 2008 4:23 PM"

I would hope Natalie Wood's Russian accent was good, considering that her real name was Natalia Nikolaevna Zakharenko and both her parents were Russian immigrants.

Posted by: Teddy | June 6, 2008 4:32 PM | Report abuse

Michelle Pfeifer had a terrible Russian accent in that spy movie with Sean Connery. Also, she played his love interest despite considerable age gap - yuck.

Glenn Close as the woman for whom Michael Douglas risks everything in Fatal Attraction. She's a good actress, but in looks she can't hold a candle to Anne Archer, who played his wife.

A terrific bit of spot-on casting in an otherwise unremarkable recent movie: Donny Osmond in the recent Raven Symone/Martin Lawrence movie College Road Trip. Donny played the annoyingly perky and chipper dad of a student, clearly poking fun at himself. I laughed out loud, embarrassing my daughter and her friend.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 4:32 PM | Report abuse

Yes, "The Conqueror." Thank you,dakine01.

Posted by: Curmudgeon | June 6, 2008 4:34 PM | Report abuse

I read Charlie and the Chocolate Factory many, many times to my son before he could read it himself. It provides the classic Roald Dahl combination of dark and wacky. In the book, I thought Wonka comes across as too preachy and mean-spirited. I think Gene Wilder picks up on the wacky aspect (and a lighter dose of the mean-spiritiedness), while Johnny Depp draws from the more sinister or dark side of the character. I find both fascinating portrayals and in keeping with the novel. I am glad that neither movie version comes across as preachy as the book. In the book those Oompha-Loompah songs go on and on for pages making fun of each poor kid's foibles.

Wow, that was kind of serious for 4:45 on a Friday. Cheers for the weekend everyone!

Posted by: 44west | June 6, 2008 4:46 PM | Report abuse

That movie with Michelle Pfeiffer was The Russia House, and actually, it was Sean Connery who was more miscast. Loved the book. Sean Connery was totally not Barley. Michelle Pfeiffer wasn't really the Russian chick either, though.

Of course, I've not yet seen a well-cast adaptation of a Le Carré novel (not seen Tinker Tailor, however). Pierce Brosnan in Tailor of Panama? So wrong. Ralph Fiennes in The Constant Gardener? Wrong wrong wrong. (and Bill Nighy was in the wrong role, but at least he were there.)

I couldn't get through Master and Commander. Adore the books. Have been in love with Stephen Maturin and Tom Pullings for ten years. Paul Bettany needed a better script, James d'Arcy is simply too pretty to be Tom (and that scar ain't nothing close to what happened to poor Tom's face), and ow, the pain of Russell Crowe. And that was *not* Bonden. And Blakeney looked like Calamy and the whole load of characters and plot just had me utter confused. Bad bad bad adaptation.

Posted by: MB | June 6, 2008 4:58 PM | Report abuse

About Troy, no matter who they cast as Helen she would not have been beautiful enough. Everyone has different views about beauty, so the MOST BEAUTIFUL woman in the world is in the eye of the beholder, and no one would have measured up for everyone. (my wife is the most beautiful woman in the world to me)

Posted by: dw | June 6, 2008 1:04 PM

dw, you should get something "extra special" tonight for the comment you made about your wife. She is lucky to have you!

Posted by: Sterling | June 6, 2008 5:01 PM | Report abuse

As mentioned earlier (and the movie in question is titled "The Conqueror"), but not just John Wayne as Ghengis Kahn; most all of the casting on that flick is atrocious.

Agnes Morehead (Samantha's mother in the original "Bewitched") as the mother of a Mongol warlord? C'mon.

Susan Hayward as "The Tartar woman?"

There are a lot of reasons that movie was put away for a couple of decades

Posted by: dakine01 | June 6, 2008 4:26 PM
===========================================

And of course, the horrible fun fact on that movie was that the cast all died of various cancers because not only did they film the exteriors near where nuclear testing had recently taken place, but they also shipped in tons of the same dirt from there so that the set pieces would look the same. All that death from such a terrible movie.

Posted by: CallMeSkeptical | June 6, 2008 5:04 PM | Report abuse

MB:

Sir Alec Guinness was the perfect Smiley in "Tinker Tailor ..." and "Smiley's People." Rent them, you'll be glad you did.

Posted by: Karla | June 6, 2008 5:04 PM | Report abuse

Does anyone remember "Exit to Eden"?

The film was supposedly based on the soft-porn novel by Anne Rice (written under a different name, of course).

Rosie O'Donnell and Dan Ackroyd were more of an embarassment than the rest of the doomed cast put together!

Posted by: Curmudgeon | June 6, 2008 5:10 PM | Report abuse

Hey stop with the Natalie Wood bashing! Speaking of accents, her Russian one in "Meteor" is actually pretty good. (Brian Keith's, on the other hand. . . .)

--------------
That's because SHE IS Russian!

Posted by: bkp | June 6, 2008 5:15 PM | Report abuse

Hey, hey, hey!

There's a fake Curmudgeon in here somewhere.

I, however, am the one true Curmudgeon; I insist that the fake Curmudgeon cease and disist (forthwith).

Posted by: Curmudgeon | June 6, 2008 5:20 PM | Report abuse

I try to deliberately try to forget "Exit To Eden", a movie about a Hedonism-like resort which was neither sexy nor funny. And while Rosie is no fashion plate in black leather, Ackroyd in bondage gear is nausea-inducing.

Posted by: yellojkt | June 6, 2008 5:23 PM | Report abuse

yellojkt -

I recommend the book.

Kinky but fun, just like the old Anne Rice.

Posted by: Curmudgeon | June 6, 2008 5:27 PM | Report abuse

Michael Keaton as Dogberry in Much Ado About Nothing, awful!
Meg Ryan as a cardiovascular surgeon in City of Angels, I guess she wanted to "stretch".
Leo DiCaprio (who can be so good in the right role) and Cameron Diaz (there is no right role) and their Lucky Charms Irish brogues in Gangs of New York.

Posted by: Liz | June 6, 2008 5:27 PM | Report abuse

The real Mudge would know how to spell desist.

Posted by: the real curmudgeon | June 6, 2008 5:39 PM | Report abuse

Cameron Diaz was ok as the trampy, dim sister in In Her Shoes. That role was not much of a stretch for her, really. She is also good as the voice of Princess Fiona in the Shrek movies.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 5:44 PM | Report abuse

Point Break: Patrick Swayze should have been the football player/FBI agent and Reeves should have been the surfer/bank robber.

Donnie Darko: Drew Barrymore brings the movie to a crashing halt in every scene she's in. I'm sure she does this with all of her movies, but Donnie Darko is good otherwise.

Posted by: PowerBoater69 | June 6, 2008 5:48 PM | Report abuse

Maxine Bahns in the Edward Burns movies ("Brothers McMullen" and "She's the One"). Whenever she spoke her lines, it just screamed, "I'm acting!" Which is to say, that she just lacked the naturalness that allows solid actors to meld into their parts. Maybe it was because she was too raw/new as an actor at the time.

For the anti-Hayden Christensen folks, be sure to see "Shattered Glass." He is fantastic in that, as is the rest of the great cast, including Peter Sarsgaard and Chloe Sevigny.

Posted by: Jtex | June 6, 2008 5:49 PM | Report abuse

How about OJ Simpson, completely out of his league in the Towering Inferno? The cast included luminaries such as Steve McQueen, Faye Dunaway, Fred Astaire, William Holden.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 5:49 PM | Report abuse

OK, how about Jenny Garner as Elektra? Does she look Greek to you? Does she ever really hit it as a cold-blooded assassin and seductress whose only weakness is the love for Matt (Daredevil)? No, she's Jenny Garner all the way, high school cheerleader.

Posted by: Diana | June 6, 2008 5:55 PM | Report abuse

That baby in "Three Men and a Baby" was plain awful.

Posted by: Phil | June 6, 2008 5:55 PM | Report abuse

Mis-spelling desist on my part was just a test. (Mmmwwwwaahehehhahahahahahah)

I, the one true Curmudgeon (you can tell it's me because I chew scenery just like William Shatner), have been away from the city for awhile.

But now I'm back. B

eware the wrath of Kahn? er, um, I mean Curmudgeon!

Posted by: The One, True Curmudgeon | June 6, 2008 5:56 PM | Report abuse

Didn't Sean Connery play a horrid cartoon-type bad guy in the Mrs. Peel re-hash movie?

peeyew!

Posted by: Curmudgeon | June 6, 2008 5:59 PM | Report abuse

First of all, most of the "actors" mentioned so far are not actors - they're movie stars. There is a difference. Movie stars don't act - they're the same over & over again, like every song Paul McCartney ever wrote without John Lennon.

But as far as actors go, Nick Nolte as Thomas Jefferson is right up there. Or Algelina Jolie in MR. & Mrs. Smith with a 9mm semi-automatic held up in her thigh-highs? Do you know how much they weigh? But maybe that's just props.

And I was really dissapointed to see Dustin hoff,am the other day on TV answering the question of what was his favorite movie he was in & he didn;t day "Ishtar." So that's a double vote for him & Warrren.

Posted by: Rob Clark | June 6, 2008 6:05 PM | Report abuse

Where have you been, Curmudgeon?

(BTW, a lot of posers have been trolling the blog. As a result, I finally quit using my regular handle and just post anonymously.)

Posted by: welcome back | June 6, 2008 6:08 PM | Report abuse

Speaking of Nick Nolte--when he was cast as Julia Roberts's love interest, Peter Brackett, in I Love Trouble. Waaaaaay too old for her--it was like grandpa hanging around the daycare center.

Posted by: just ick | June 6, 2008 6:14 PM | Report abuse

Nicole Kidman as a brain surgeon in Days of Thunder ranks up there with Richards as a nuclear physicist and Meg Ryan as a heart surgeon. There are women who can easily play these roles, not one of which is named above.

Eastwood in Bridges, for sure--too old, not sexy enough.

Absolutely ANY of the films where we have an aging male star as love interest for young nubile actress (either casting). Much as I love him, I couldn't see what attraction De Niro could hold for Amy Brennerman in Heat. But agree with earlier poster that the most egregious of these is Woody Allen *cringe*

Posted by: hermespal | June 6, 2008 6:58 PM | Report abuse

And of course, the horrible fun fact on that movie was that the cast all died of various cancers because not only did they film the exteriors near where nuclear testing had recently taken place, but they also shipped in tons of the same dirt from there so that the set pieces would look the same. All that death from such a terrible movie.

Posted by: CallMeSkeptical | June 6, 2008 5:04 PM

Yep, I believe that over half of the cast and crew wound up dying of various cancers. It is often described as "the cancer movie."

The filming was in the Utah desert, downwid from the Neveda test sites.

Posted by: dakine01 | June 6, 2008 7:27 PM | Report abuse

Greta Garbo in the romantic comedy Two-Faced Woman. It practically ruined her career.

Posted by: C. Reaves | June 6, 2008 7:40 PM | Report abuse

Just because your parents were born in Russia doesn't mean you're going to have a flawless accent as an adult. I believe the point was that Natalie has a talent for accents that Kevin Coster, et al, doesn't.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 6, 2008 7:46 PM | Report abuse

It's been a while but when I (a native southern) saw "Steel Magnolias", it appeared that every female character had a different version of a southern accent. Different states and different socioeconomic classes have different accents, y'all.

Posted by: Angela | June 6, 2008 8:19 PM | Report abuse

Despite fine performances from fine actors (Philip Seymour Hoffman, Cate Blanchett, Gwyneth, Jude) Matt Damon managed to drag "The Talented Mr. Ripley" down into the realm of badness.
Ever since I saw him ruin that film, I've refused to pay money to watch him in a movie. Which is too bad, because I like those "Oceans" movies w/Clooney & Pitt. So I watch them when they're on TV, but I make a point of not buying any of the products advertised.
Take THAT, Matt Damon!

Posted by: Carlos T. Jackal | June 6, 2008 8:39 PM | Report abuse

Halle Barry in Catwoman.

Ok the movie was terrible. But she made it worse.

Posted by: Silver Spring. | June 6, 2008 9:01 PM | Report abuse

boris karloff and Don Quixote.

Posted by: mmc | June 6, 2008 9:12 PM | Report abuse

I see your Mickey Rooney in Breakfast at Tiffany's and I raise you a Lawrence Olivier in Khartoum. He was practically in blackface for his role as the Mahdi.

Posted by: Elii | June 6, 2008 10:28 PM | Report abuse

How could anyone forget Tom Cruise in Far and Away? Has to be one of the worst accents ever!

Posted by: VAtoLA | June 6, 2008 10:54 PM | Report abuse

Two of my favorite actors had just BIZARRE roles:
Marlon Brando in "Teahouse of the August Moon" pretending to be Japanese, and
Edward G. Robinson (and just about everyone else in the cast) in "Ten Commandments," a tremendously fun movie with many crazy missteps (one of the best movie lines of all time came from Anne Baxter, "Kiss me, Moses!). She looked like she was beamed into Egypt after cocktails at the Cococabana.

Posted by: cococo | June 6, 2008 11:42 PM | Report abuse

Two of my favorite actors had just BIZARRE roles:
Marlon Brando in "Teahouse of the August Moon" pretending to be Japanese, and
Edward G. Robinson (and just about everyone else in the cast) in "Ten Commandments," a tremendously fun movie with many crazy missteps (one of the best movie lines of all time came from Anne Baxter, "Kiss me, Moses!). She looked like she was beamed into Egypt after cocktails at the Cococabana.
Boris Karloff was cast as Don Quixote?!?!
I like Michelle Pfeiffer a lot, but remember when she was cast as a former marine teaching tough students in the South Bronx. Ouch. Really wrong.

Posted by: cococo | June 6, 2008 11:47 PM | Report abuse

Tony Randall -7 Faces of Dr. Lao

Posted by: sten keadman | June 6, 2008 11:49 PM | Report abuse

Angela - you are so right about regional southern accents, BUT every time Olympia Dukakis (sp?) opened her mouth I wanted to scream! What? They couldn't do better than that?

Posted by: PJ123 | June 7, 2008 12:47 AM | Report abuse

I know no one is going to see this, but timing is everything. EW's list of 16 worst movie accents, most of which have already been mentioned, but some that we didn't think of.

http://www.ew.com/ew/gallery/0,,20204699,00.html

Posted by: Anonymous | June 7, 2008 1:08 PM | Report abuse

Yentl. 'Nuff said.

Posted by: GAFF | June 9, 2008 7:47 AM | Report abuse

Heather Graham as Mary Kelly in From Hell. It's such a forgettable movie, but that one has always bugged me...

Posted by: maddie | June 9, 2008 11:11 AM | Report abuse

I was watching "Dragon, The Bruce Lee Story" today and I got my first glimpse at a scene in "Breakfast at Tiffany's" (Bruce Lee was at the theater watching the movie) and the actor displayed a very apparent dissent for the comedic foil (Mickey Rooney as an Asian). Horrible. And racist. Surprising???

Posted by: bean sprout | June 9, 2008 2:17 PM | Report abuse

Maureen O'Hara as a Bedouin princess in "Bagdad"...what???

Along the same lines, Katherine Hepburn is fabulous in everything, but "Dragon Seed"? You could never get away with that today.

I also second Renee Zellweger in "A Price Above Rubies." Just...ugh.

Posted by: R | June 10, 2008 1:46 AM | Report abuse

Sophia Coppola in ....anything. Stick to directing!

Posted by: doobrah | June 10, 2008 9:57 AM | Report abuse

I'd be amazed if anyone is still reading this thread, but here goes. . .

"Gettysburg" provides a wonderful example of both the best and worst of casting decisions, with Martin Sheen a prime example of the latter. Even though this is the opposite of our topic, here are some examples from that movie of excellent casting:

Jeff Daniels as Colonel Chamberlain
Sam Elliot as General Buford
Kevin Conway as Sgt Kilrain
Morgan Sheppard as Gen. Trimble
James Patrick Stuart as Col. Alexander

Bad casting decisions (other than Sheen)? The are too many to mention, but include among others Tom Berenger as Longstreet and C. Thomas Howell (with the additional dubious honor of "worst fake facial hair in a movie full of bad fake facial hair)

Posted by: Doc | June 10, 2008 11:24 AM | Report abuse

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