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Posted at 10:47 AM ET, 06/27/2008

Friday List: Screen on the Green in Hell

By Paul Williams

Back for its 10th season, Screen on the Green will be upon us again starting July 14 with "Dr. No." The series of movies on the Mall packs viewers in who want to picnic, socialize and enjoy a classic film on a huge screen set up in front of the Capitol.

Last month, Sunday Source's Dan Zak explained a little bit about the film selection process and offered his picks for the perfect outdoor summer viewing.

This got me thinking: What would be the worst possible films to watch outdoors with a couple thousand people in a festive mood. Not just "Gigli" bad, but completely inappropriate for the setting. My list follows:

5) "Gerry." Matt Damon and Casey Affleck wander around in the desert for an hour and a half, as absolutely nothing happens.

4) "Mulholland Drive." This could almost be the "David Lynch Presents" list, as so many of his films would work (or fail, as it were), and while I love this movie, it's almost completely impenetrable and requires repeat viewings, rewinding, etc. Even with that, I still have no idea what the deal is with The Cowboy.

3) "Spanking the Monkey." Because nothing says "summer fun" like a film that features mother-son incest. Talk about making the crowd uncomfortable.

2) "Dogville" This spectacularly pretentious and pedantic Lars Von Trier/Nicole Kidman joint is the kind of thing that should be played outdoors only in an attempt to get foreign strongmen to leave their compounds.

1) "Old Yeller." 'Nuff said.

What's your list? Share below.

-- Paul Williams


By Paul Williams  | June 27, 2008; 10:47 AM ET
Categories:  Friday Lists  
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Comments

The Verne Troyer sex tape.

Ew.

Just.

Ew.

Posted by: Bored @ work | June 27, 2008 11:37 AM | Report abuse

Although there is ONE David Lynch film that COULD be shown, "The Straight Story."

It was rated PG & was a most excellent movie.

Posted by: Bored @ work | June 27, 2008 11:40 AM | Report abuse

5. "Leaving Las Vegas"
4. "Quest For Fire"
3. "Chuck & Buck"
2. "Breaking The Waves"
1. "Happiness"

Posted by: Thor | June 27, 2008 11:41 AM | Report abuse


Ooo. Old Yeller's a good pick. I saw that movie once. And only once. Same with my top choice:

Bambi

Posted by: WDC 21113 | June 27, 2008 11:43 AM | Report abuse

Bored @ Work: Yes, I second your recommendation for A Straight Story. Excellent film, very moving and family-friendly (though maybe not captivating for the younger crowd).

Posted by: Straight Story FTW | June 27, 2008 11:45 AM | Report abuse

Can't think of a really bad movie, but I would like to say that not too long ago I caught an outdoor showing of the Big Lebowski. It was great, we were in the parking lot of a bowling alley and being served white russians.

Posted by: Dorkus | June 27, 2008 11:48 AM | Report abuse

wdc and i are on the same wavelength.
i would add:
"the unbearable lightness of being" aka unbearable;
"duet for one" w/julie andrews and liam neeson, yegods, horrifying, permanent eye damage from watching this stilted film;
"before the devil knows you're dead" with philip seymour hoffman - a complete downer about aging, death, terrible family relationships, and yet no mention of depends.

Posted by: janet loves movies | June 27, 2008 11:50 AM | Report abuse

The Cook, the Thief, His Wife and Her Lover. See how many people end up puking before the credits.

Posted by: musicgeek | June 27, 2008 11:53 AM | Report abuse

"A Clockwork Orange." Self-explanatory.

Posted by: musicgeek forgot one | June 27, 2008 11:54 AM | Report abuse

Eating Raoul

Pink Flamingos

A Ron Jeremy film fest

Any snuff film

Posted by: Sasquatch | June 27, 2008 11:58 AM | Report abuse

Oh Dorkus, The Big Lebowski is one of my all time favorite movies - hubby and I quote to each other all the time. "I like your style dude." "Nothing is F---d here! Nothing is F---d! The GD plane has crashed into the side of the mountain..." "Phone's ringing, Dude." "Thank you Donnie." "I cut off your johnson!" "F--ing dipsh*t with a nine toed woman." And oh, the list goes on and on. And one of these days I am going to locate and purchase the red shoes that the girls are wearing in the "Gutterballs" dream sequence.

Posted by: sunnydaze | June 27, 2008 11:59 AM | Report abuse

Thor,

I beg to differ. "Quest for Fire" would be great outdoor viewing. Though as family fare, not so much. "Barry Lyndon" (or almost any beautifully photographed costume drama where nothing happens) would be a horrible choice as well.

Posted by: Red Dragon | June 27, 2008 12:00 PM | Report abuse

Anything by Uwe Boll. (He's noted for taking reasonably good video game properties and grinding them facedown into the pavement. Also adding lots and lots of boobies.)

Posted by: Bawlmer | June 27, 2008 12:01 PM | Report abuse

Ah, aren't films shown in this manner usually more family friendly?

Posted by: jake e. poo | June 27, 2008 12:04 PM | Report abuse

Sasquatch: Pink Flamingos wins it in a landslide. I'm done, I can't even think of anything that could beat that.
One film I really enjoyed was "Sick: The Life and Death of Bob Flanagan, Supermasochist".
...What? Wait, I can explain! It was for a class!
IMDB: "Documentary about writer and performance artist Bob Flanagan who died at 43 of cystic fibrosis. His life was indicated by pain from the beginning and he started to develop sadomasochistic practices, which he developed finally into performances."
It's a great movie, but watching requires a strong stomach (and preferably a private viewing room).

Posted by: Bawlmer | June 27, 2008 12:07 PM | Report abuse

I'm with JLM on "The Unbearable Lightness of Being." In my head, I refer to it as the "Unbearable Longness of Movie."

First thing that jumped into my head was "Battlefield Earth." Transcendental badness. A clunker no matter the setting.

Others:
"Dead Man Walking"
"Memento" (GREAT movie but not the kind of movie you want to idly graze while you are distracted by kids, picnic ants, etc.)
"Dune" (Impenetrable under the best of circumstances except for those who read the novels.)
"Schindler's List" (particularly ill-suited for light-hearted family picnics, or for making out.)

Posted by: NW DC | June 27, 2008 12:07 PM | Report abuse

Point accepted.

:s/4\. \"Quest For Fire\"/4\. \"Desperate Living\"/

Posted by: Thor | June 27, 2008 12:10 PM | Report abuse

Eraserhead (Preferably a dubbed French-language print with English subtitles)

Canadian Bacon

Eyes Wide Shut

The Brown Bunny

Bad Lieutenant

Posted by: byoolin | June 27, 2008 12:17 PM | Report abuse

"I'm with JLM on 'The Unbearable Lightness of Being.' In my head, I refer to it as the 'Unbearable Longness of Movie.' - Posted by: NW DC

***********

Note to the Lovely Mrs. byoolin: SEE? I'm not the only one who calls it that. It *is too* funny, and I'm going to keep calling it that.

Posted by: byoolin harrumphs like it he thinks he's won that argument. | June 27, 2008 12:19 PM | Report abuse

byoolin harrumphs like it he thinks he's won that argument.

Posted by: byoolin takes back the 'it' for future use. | June 27, 2008 12:20 PM | Report abuse

Ishtar....

Then again, with a properly lubricated audience, it could be so bad it would be hilarious.

Advise and Consent -- just for the irony.

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 12:21 PM | Report abuse

Also a good candidate:

Any movie with Red in the title:

Reds
Red Dawn

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 12:23 PM | Report abuse

Fritz the Cat

Bambi Meets Godzilla

Thank You, Masked Man

Deep Throat

War & Peace

Tora! Tora! Tora!

Soylent Green

Dune

Ishtar

Posted by: Saquatch | June 27, 2008 12:25 PM | Report abuse

Blue Velvet;
Trainspotting;
Aguirre: The Wrath of God;
Fanny and Alexander;
Sophie's Choice;
Sexy Beast

Posted by: Yoki | June 27, 2008 12:28 PM | Report abuse

b @ 12:23,

Nuh uh - The IncRedibles would be most excellent.

Posted by: ftl,dts, who has literal-minded issues | June 27, 2008 12:31 PM | Report abuse

Saving Private Ryan - the worst movie to watch with food/drink

Posted by: ABQ | June 27, 2008 12:36 PM | Report abuse

American Beauty.

Posted by: 23112 | June 27, 2008 12:37 PM | Report abuse

Watership Down. It is not a cute family friendly story about bunnies. Too bad my mother did not realize that before she took me to see it.

Ishtar. Wandering in the desert, stupid movie.

Gone with the Wind -- great movie -- 6 hours. EEEEEKK.

Judgement at Nuremberg. courtroom without a lot of drama (although one of the few dramatic moments won Judy Garland an Oscar). Also incredibly long. On the other hand, To Kill a Mockingbirg and Inherit the Wind would be good.

Hmmm, made need to watch those again to remind myself why I am putting myself through all this pain in order to take the bar.

Posted by: ep | June 27, 2008 12:41 PM | Report abuse

Fast Food Nation

YUM!!!!

Posted by: Sasquatch needs lunch | June 27, 2008 12:43 PM | Report abuse

I saw a movie last weekend that would be perfect for this bunch. Romance and Cigarettes. Directed by John Turturro, produced by the Coen Brothers, stars James Gandolfini, Susan Sarandon, Mary Louise Parker, Kate Winslet and the always great Christoper Walken. So what could be wrong with this movie? It turned out to be a freakin' musical!!! Arrrrggggh!!!!

Posted by: jake e. poo | June 27, 2008 12:45 PM | Report abuse

Even though I actually really like this movie, "Magnolia" is not for everyone, and certainly not for Screen on the Green.

That said, I think "Planet of the Apes" (the original, natch) would be one of all the all time great flicks to watch while lounging on the lawn with a few cocktails in the shaker.

Posted by: methinks | June 27, 2008 12:46 PM | Report abuse

"American Psycho." Loved it, but yikes. And while we're on Christian Bale, "The Machinist" would also be a terrible choice.

Posted by: jane | June 27, 2008 12:49 PM | Report abuse

Quills

Blood Simple

Midnight Cowboy

Alien

Posted by: Saquatch | June 27, 2008 12:51 PM | Report abuse

Natural Born Killers

"How do you like me now, flirty boy?"

Posted by: sunnydaze has some pent up aggression | June 27, 2008 12:52 PM | Report abuse

I have to disagree w/Red Dawn. It would make an excellent movie to watch on a lawn with a large group! Ridiculous, but easily followed plot, plenty of action and that cast! Patrick Swayze (I know we're all sending him love, but. . .), C. Thomas Howell, Charlie Sheen (always a Celebritology fave), Lea Thompson & Jennifer Grey-it's like. . .I know there's a joke here about this being the Brat Pack.2, but it's not coming to me-some help please? And as a bonus lots of good ol' nationalist fervor-prefect for viewing with the Capitol in the background!

Posted by: tl | June 27, 2008 12:55 PM | Report abuse

I don't know, Alien, or any other scary type flick might be fun for an evening on the lawn. Maybe not for kids, but a later evening on the lawn.

Mr. sunnydaze has recently brought up the notion of hanging a screen on the shed and inviting the neighbors to watch movies in our back yard. I will have to keep these suggestions or cautions in mind if we actually do that.

Posted by: sunnydaze | June 27, 2008 12:55 PM | Report abuse

Posted by: jake e. poo | June 27, 2008 12:45 PM

Was there cow bell in that movie?

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 12:56 PM | Report abuse

Ooops! I meant "perfect."

Posted by: tl | June 27, 2008 12:57 PM | Report abuse

"Alien"? I think that would be fun (on non-kids night). But I haven't seen it in a while, so maybe I'm not remembering it well enough.

Here's another: "Crash" (the Cronenberg car-accident one). Actually, the Haggis one too, for that matter, but for different reasons.

Posted by: jane | June 27, 2008 12:57 PM | Report abuse

Weekend at Bernie's

Or how about Rocky Horror Picture Show?

Would you rake up the toilet paper, vacuum it with a blower or just mow over it the next day?

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 12:57 PM | Report abuse

Basic Instinct
Your Friends and Neighbors
The Aristocrats
Gosford Park (I couldn't understand a freakin' word they said, and I watched it in my living room with the sound way up)
The Blue, White, Red Trilogy (or any film with subtitles, really)

Posted by: Wikijen | June 27, 2008 12:58 PM | Report abuse

I agree with tl re: Red Dawn. WOLVERINES!!

Posted by: methinks | June 27, 2008 12:58 PM | Report abuse

Sunnydaze that's a great idea! Can we all come over? ha ha

Posted by: tl | June 27, 2008 12:59 PM | Report abuse

Repo Man

"Ordinary f*&^ing people: I hate 'em."

The Adventures of Buckaroo Banzai Across the Eight Dimension

Posted by: Sasquatch | June 27, 2008 1:02 PM | Report abuse

tl - absolutely! But it might be a long haul for some since we are in rural NC! But bring your tent - there is plenty of room for camping and roasted marshmallows can only add to the fun!

Posted by: sunnydaze | June 27, 2008 1:03 PM | Report abuse

Buckaroo Bonzai would be great! "Don't pull on that, you don't know what it's connected to..."

Posted by: sunnydaze | June 27, 2008 1:04 PM | Report abuse

I stand corrected.

Hunt for Red October
The Red Shoes


But then again:
Red Planet
Legally Blonde 2: Red White and Blonde
Red Eye

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 1:05 PM | Report abuse

Buckaroo Bonzai would be awesome!
I have this engraved on my iPod.

"No matter where you go, there you are."

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 1:05 PM | Report abuse

hows about "becoming jane" -- I kept thinking that one would get better...but yet, it didn't.

"the red violin" -- disturbingly depressing.

another would be "calendar girls" -- no nudity, but the possibility of potentially seeing naked grandmothers is not at all appealing.

actually, any of the movies I've seen through netflix would apply...I'm apparently really good at picking out boring, stink-o movies.

Posted by: suffered through them | June 27, 2008 1:05 PM | Report abuse

Thanks Paul for giving us a topic so that we don't revert to foreign language day, again!

Posted by: sunnydaze | June 27, 2008 1:06 PM | Report abuse

Ice Castles
or any other movie about getting very sick, very old, or dying. No downers on the lawn please.

Posted by: sunnydaze | June 27, 2008 1:10 PM | Report abuse

Was there cow bell in that movie?

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 12:56 PM

It couldn't have made the movie any worse, it might have improved it.

Posted by: jake e. poo | June 27, 2008 1:10 PM | Report abuse

"Secretary"
"Deliverance"
"Last Tango in Paris"

Posted by: CJB | June 27, 2008 1:11 PM | Report abuse

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolverine

Posted by: WOLVERINE!!!!! | June 27, 2008 1:12 PM | Report abuse

More Screen on the Green non-starters:

Seven
The Last Emporer
Gandhi

OTOH, I think they should consider

Joe's Apartment. I can't explain how this movie manages to be gross but charming at the same time.

Posted by: NW DC | June 27, 2008 1:21 PM | Report abuse

Requiem for a Dream

Posted by: lza | June 27, 2008 1:25 PM | Report abuse

The most depressing movie of all time:
Grave of the Fireflies. It's this Japanese animated movie about a brother and sister who survive the firebombing of Tokyo, then things really turn bad. I was sobbing by the end.

Posted by: h3 | June 27, 2008 1:33 PM | Report abuse

Buckaroo Bonzai would be awesome!
I have this engraved on my iPod.

"No matter where you go, there you are."

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 1:05 PM

Peter Weller turned 61 earlier this week. A friend of mine always screwed the name of the movie up and called it "Buckarai Bonzoo". She also called a famous Swedish film director Ingman Bergmar.

Seventh Seal would be a bad choice to watch outside, I think.
Naked Jungle might also be bad, what with the army ants and all.

Posted by: B'More Cat and Movie Lover | June 27, 2008 1:33 PM | Report abuse

"Buckaroo Bonzai would be awesome!" - Posted by: b

Isn't 'Buckaroo Bonzai' the title of Verne's new, er, release?

Posted by: byoolin | June 27, 2008 1:34 PM | Report abuse

Stepmom (AWFUL!)
The Hours
The Deer Hunter (awesome movie but kinda slow and very disturbing)

Posted by: more from methinks | June 27, 2008 1:34 PM | Report abuse

ladies & gents, the reason why I listed Buckaroo Banzai as a terrible film to see on the Green comes from its style of humor. It comes from the Firesign Theatre school of surreal settigns and dialog. To get the humor, you must have have both a good projection system and a good sound system. If you're lacking either, you're going to miss 1/2 to 2/3 of the best moments in the movie. In a typical Green setting, the sound quality will be mediocre at best. IN such a situation, the viewers who isn't already a fan of the movie will last maybe 20 minutes before turning to his or her companions and saying, "WTF, wanna go get a couple o' drink?"

In the proper setting -- good projection, good sound, and the appropriate refreshments -- Buckaroo Banzai is a hoot.

Boo-TAY!!! Boo-TAY!!!!

Posted by: Saquatch | June 27, 2008 1:37 PM | Report abuse

"Red Eye"

Wait! Isn't "Red Eye" a description for James McAvoy's condition after drinking all those protein shakes?

Posted by: Sasquatch | June 27, 2008 1:39 PM | Report abuse

B'More C & M L - maybe your friend would enjoy reading 'Rarnaby Budge,' by Charles Dikkens (the well-known Dutch author).

Posted by: byoolin | June 27, 2008 1:40 PM | Report abuse

A collection of the "best", i.e., grossest Dirty Jobs episodes.

MMM-mmmmmm.

Good, though.

Posted by: Saquatch | June 27, 2008 1:42 PM | Report abuse

I have to agree with "Secretary" and "Natural Born Killers", but I was going to say pretty much anything directed by Quentin Tarantino. His movies aren't particularly family or outdoor friendly.

I wish I lived in DC still so I could see these on the Mall, but in my little city in Florida, tonight they're showing "Horton Hears a Who" outdoors. I guess I'll settle ;)

Posted by: flutterbyjen | June 27, 2008 1:49 PM | Report abuse

american history x would be horrible, horrible, horrible to show on the green. it's a good movie, but highly disturbing. oddly enough it comes on abc family sometimes in the middle of the afternoon and i'm still trying to figure out why that is.
also bad, passion of the christ. i can sense the law suits now....

Posted by: melissamac1 | June 27, 2008 1:51 PM | Report abuse

in addition to battlefield, a real stinker, what about:
waterworld
any warhol film
kagemusha by kurosawa

Posted by: janet ponders more choices | June 27, 2008 1:51 PM | Report abuse

I Know Who Killed Me
Herbie: Fully Loaded
Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen

Posted by: musicgeek is just trying to provoke luvlinsey | June 27, 2008 1:51 PM | Report abuse

yur so mean, stoopid musicgreek.
i hate you. linseyz movies are the best!!! she will win a acadamy award someday.

Posted by: luvlinsey | June 27, 2008 1:53 PM | Report abuse

Requiem for a Dream
Donnie Darko
Crash
Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind
Memento

So basically all of my favorite movies...

Posted by: hr girl | June 27, 2008 1:58 PM | Report abuse

flutterbyjen's post has me wanting to see Quentin Tarantino's "Horton Hears A Who."

Or any QT-Dr. Suess mashup.

"Do I _look_ like I want any m************ eggs and ham?"

"Little Cindy Lou Who - b*tch was just two..."

"I am the black Cat in the m************ hat. And Thing 1 and Thing 2 are gonna **** you up."

And, of course, "Hit her with the adrenaline spike, Horton!"

Posted by: byoolin | June 27, 2008 2:03 PM | Report abuse

well music geek there you go, you've awoken the TTT.

Posted by: melissamac1 | June 27, 2008 2:03 PM | Report abuse

Oh, and Full Metal Jacket.

Posted by: hr girl | June 27, 2008 2:03 PM | Report abuse

We've got Shrek III this evening at the park here in smallville, NC

Posted by: sunnydaze | June 27, 2008 2:04 PM | Report abuse

Welcome to the Dollhouse
Kids
Dead Man Walking
Green Mile

Posted by: RiverCityRoller | June 27, 2008 2:04 PM | Report abuse

I don't believe that was the REAL luvlinsey just then. Mainly because I believe the term is "UR so mean" not "yur so mean".

Posted by: RiverCityRoller is frightened by her own fluency in TTT. | June 27, 2008 2:08 PM | Report abuse

forgot one:
Baxter, about the homicidal dog and his eventual nazi loving owner.

Posted by: janet's over 50 and can't remember everything | June 27, 2008 2:19 PM | Report abuse

Koyaanisqatsi

My Dinner with Andre

Persona

Posted by: ADHD says bring the kids! | June 27, 2008 2:22 PM | Report abuse

"Last Days." Basically, Gus Van Sant's account of the last days of a Kurt Cobain-like rock star. Interminable. Will clear out the green in about 20 minutes.

Posted by: KLeewrite | June 27, 2008 2:28 PM | Report abuse

Bad movie for family viewing on the lawn?

"The Return of Martin Guerre"

(fantastic film, wonderful story, but a real downer)

Posted by: Curmudgeon | June 27, 2008 2:31 PM | Report abuse

"...she will win a acadamy award someday."

Only while wearing her kneepadded leggings.

Posted by: Anonymous | June 27, 2008 2:33 PM | Report abuse

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Wolverine

Posted by: WOLVERINE!!!!! | June 27, 2008 1:12 PM

"Wolverine I could have lost to, he's got claws for hands!"

Posted by: Bawlmer's truthiness is showing. | June 27, 2008 2:38 PM | Report abuse

You're outside, on a nice green lawn and the last thing you want to see is

"12 Angry Men"
"Midnight Express"
"Papillon"
"Stalag 17"

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | June 27, 2008 2:40 PM | Report abuse

True Romance comes to mind. Why I ever thought that I liked that movie I'll never know.

Oh and Rising Sun would be a very, VERY bad movie to watch at a family friendly event. I speak from experience.

Posted by: Stuck@Work | June 27, 2008 2:48 PM | Report abuse

Oh yeah, and even though I haven't seen it I'm guessing "The Happening" isn't something you'd want to watch outdoors. (SPOILER?) Especially if there are trees around.

Posted by: Still Stuck@Work | June 27, 2008 2:49 PM | Report abuse

Pan's Labyrinth - great movie, if you haven't seen it, but I would be looking for the creepy no eyed guy the whole time if I watched it outside.

Posted by: sunnydaze | June 27, 2008 2:54 PM | Report abuse

'The Accused'

Posted by: jes | June 27, 2008 2:57 PM | Report abuse

"The House of Yes"

"Night of the Living Dead" Cause you just know at some point the sick and twisted on the green are goiing to start walking around like zombies. The kids will be in therapy for years to come...

Posted by: omni | June 27, 2008 3:01 PM | Report abuse

"A Taste of Honey"

Posted by: Anonymous | June 27, 2008 3:16 PM | Report abuse

George Romero filmed part of the original "Night of the Living Dead" at Monroeville Mall in 1968.

Posted by: Used to live in Pgh | June 27, 2008 3:19 PM | Report abuse

a triple-feature of "Harvey" followed by "Donnie Darko," and then "Night of the Lepus."

Rabbits on the big screen!

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 3:23 PM | Report abuse

Rabbits on the big screen? How about "Fatal Attraction"?

Posted by: Anonymous | June 27, 2008 3:29 PM | Report abuse

He has eyes! Just - uhm - not where you'd expect them.

(I had far more trouble with the guy having to stitch his face up, myself, and I watch those surgery things on Discovery Health.)

Posted by: MB | June 27, 2008 3:29 PM | Report abuse

"Schindler's List"

Also,
"Lost in Translation"
"Match Point"
"In Good Company"
"The Nanny Diaries"

Posted by: smiff is just trying to provoke producer paul | June 27, 2008 3:49 PM | Report abuse

Terms of Endearment-just due to the depressing factor!

Posted by: Mindypoo | June 27, 2008 3:49 PM | Report abuse

Jaws, but only if seated by the reflecting pool

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 4:09 PM | Report abuse

"Blair Witch Project" (especially in the Maryland mountains)

Posted by: Anonymous | June 27, 2008 4:28 PM | Report abuse

Night of the Lepus! I thought my sister and I were the only two people who had seen that movie.

What about the horror movie with the giant grasshoppers? That would be cool!

Posted by: B'More Cat and Giant Bunny Lover | June 27, 2008 4:40 PM | Report abuse

"Independence Day" with the screen in Lafayette Park.

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 4:40 PM | Report abuse

The Birds...

Dumbo...

Posted by: Is it 5:00 yet? | June 27, 2008 4:43 PM | Report abuse

"Kissed". Saw it in Dupont Circle with a friend when it came out, and the ladies behind us had obviously not done any research before buying their tickets.

From IMDB: Over the years, a child's romantic ideals about death blossom into necrophilia, the study of embalming and the most profound relationship of her life.

Posted by: Fruitfly | June 27, 2008 5:23 PM | Report abuse

5. Remains of the Day
4. Howard's End
3. Atonement
2. Anything in a foreign language requiring subcaptions
1. The English Patient

Posted by: £££ | June 27, 2008 5:43 PM | Report abuse

I thought of another one:
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas

and I second the comment about the guy stitching up his own face - ugh that was horrible, especially when he took a drink after that. bleh

Posted by: flutterbyjen | June 27, 2008 6:21 PM | Report abuse

I apologize if anyone said this already, but anything with Demi Moore.
We'd all be snoozing and/or drinking up our bottle of wine way too fast.

Posted by: possum | June 27, 2008 6:22 PM | Report abuse

Seconding Dogville. It's not just that it's unpleasant, it's how incredibly inane the whole thing is. Most pointless film EVER.

Posted by: csdiego | June 27, 2008 7:16 PM | Report abuse

"Jaws, but only if seated by the reflecting pool

Posted by: b | June 27, 2008 4:09 PM"

In college, my friends and I wanted to do a screening of Jaws in the campus pool. We were planning to have people float in inner tubes in the water and project the movie onto the ceiling. When that failed to pan out, we did a combination dinner and a movie with "Silence of the Lambs" and "Hannibal". (Really.)

Posted by: Bawlmer wondered why it was so hard to find dates then. | June 27, 2008 9:13 PM | Report abuse


The

Tin

Drum

Posted by: Last word | June 28, 2008 12:05 AM | Report abuse

i think thor nailed it in post 3... Happiness would be unbelievably bad

Posted by: Quintilius Varus | June 28, 2008 10:25 AM | Report abuse

Broken Flowers. (But I love Bill Murray)

Posted by: SMACK | June 28, 2008 5:25 PM | Report abuse

Lorenzo's Oil. A real downer...
Elephant Man. Want to see some stoners sober up?
Chainsaw...pass the chili...
Alive...pass the, uhh, never mind...

Posted by: BDWESQTM | June 30, 2008 12:10 PM | Report abuse

5. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (original)
4. American History X
3. Guess Who's Coming to Dinner?
2. Baby Geniuses
1. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre (remake)

Posted by: myworst5 | June 30, 2008 2:58 PM | Report abuse

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