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Posted at 11:00 AM ET, 07/31/2008

Dreaming of Brad Pitt Dollar Bills? The Latest in Celeb Memorabilia

By Liz Kelly

This morning's headline about a piece of Shia LaBeouf's car wreck debris being up for grabs on eBay reminded me that I hadn't checked in on celebrity memorabilia auctions for quite some time. And here we are only five short months away from the holidays.

If you act now, you may have a chance to win of the following one-of-a-kind items and make yourself the talk of the neighborhood. (The talk may be along the lines of "I can't believe Madison paid for that piece of *#$%," or "I think maybe Frank needs to be on medication," but hey -- there's no such thing as bad press, right?). Let's not suffer the humiliation of missing out on primo merch, like this, again:

Brad Pitt Dollar Bill: From the description: "...genuine uncirculated REAL mint US Dollar Bill which depicts BRAD PITT. The Image of Brad is superimposed over George Washington on the Dollar Bill. The name Brad Pitt is inscribed on the name plate positioned below the image." In Brad we trust. (Current Bid: $16.50.)


Jay Leno Celebrity Pretzel. Okay, so I don't see it, but then I'm no expert on celebrity snack food lookalikes. But if I won this item, I think I'd eat it because maybe it would then rearrange the fabric of the universe so that Jay Leno, too, would be consumed and his matter reborn as something more pleasant. Or funny. (Current bid: $0.99)

Robin Williams Worn Hiking Boots (third item): Fetishists, take note -- get your hands on a mangled and stinky-looking pair of boots worn by Williams while filming the 2006 "hit film" "RV." Comes with a certificate of authenticity and, we're sure, a fine bouquet. (Price: $150.00)

Luke Perry Original "90210" Pin: With the new "90210" set to kick-off, show your allegiance to the old school version by sporting this hot pin of Luke channeling his foxiest Dylan McKay pose. (Current bid: $0.01)

Stevie Nicks Hand Painted Nail: Channel your own witchy woman when you slip this torturous-looking device on your finger. Imagine how much more satisfying your karaoke renditions of "Gypsy" and "Rhiannon" will be when wearing a little piece of Stevie. (Price: Oops --- sold, but just too good to leave out)

Britney Spears Pillow & Blanket Throw Afghan: Nothing says well-appointed home like a matching afghan/pillow set featuring a sultry, circa 2001 Britney Spears along with her name spelled out in massive letters. And, thank god, the blanket is fringed all around and comes from a smoke-free trailer home. (Current bid: $71)

'Lindsay Lohan Startled' Framed Mounted Photo: Are you a fan of the deer-in-the-headlights pose? Win this little gem and you'll always have a reminder of what someone looks like when being stalked, without having to do any of the pesky, time-consuming stalking yourself. (Current bid: $14.99)


Larry King 2007 Donruss Americana Celebrity Card: What collection of collectable cards would be complete without this ossified staple of the cable TV talk circuit? (Current bid: $9.99)

Elton John 1999 OSCAR Party Celebrity Invite: Win the bidding on this hot little number and place it strategically on your calendar or bulletin board. Friends and family will look at you with a new respect when they assume you've rubbed shoulders with the stars at Elton's annual Oscar bash. But, as the seller says, be warned: "Obviously this is not good for an actual entrance to the party as it has passed." (Current bid: $9.99)

Last Will and Testament of 10 Male Celebrities: Students of celebrity estate planning will want to bid early and often to win transcripts of the final wishes of such varied stars as Jerry Garcia, John Lennon, Elvis and... Napoleon? (Current Bid: $13.99)

(Images courtesy eBay)

By Liz Kelly  | July 31, 2008; 11:00 AM ET
Categories:  Celebrities, Extreme Fans, Miscellaneous  
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Comments

I bid on a signed restaurant tab from one of the Black Eyed Peas (I think) this past week. The waiter put it on eBay because the dude didn't leave any tip. Unfortunately, I was outbid (yep, someone bid more than my $14).

Posted by: 23112 | July 31, 2008 11:14 AM | Report abuse

What, no Abba turds?

Posted by: arlington | July 31, 2008 11:27 AM | Report abuse

Don't spend that Pitt!

According to the Richmond Fed's website:

"defacement of currency is a violation of Title 18, Section 333 of the United States Code. Under this provision, currency defacement is generally defined as follows: Whoever mutilates, cuts, disfigures, perforates, unites or cements together, or does any other thing to any bank bill, draft, note, or other evidence of debt issued by any national banking association, Federal Reserve Bank, or Federal Reserve System, with intent to render such item(s) unfit to be reissued, shall be fined not more than $100 or imprisoned not more than six months, or both. Defacement of currency in such a way that it is made unfit for circulation comes under the jurisdiction of the United States Secret Service."

And a lucky thing the guy selling it is in Australia - the Secret Service might call what he's doing 'counterfeiting,' and they take a dim view: "The United States Secret Service remains committed to zero tolerance and is determined to investigate each and every counterfeiting case. Each counterfeiting case, no matter how large or small, carries the serious consequences of incarceration and/or fines."

Posted by: byoolin will stick with the Angelina Chocolate Toonie. | July 31, 2008 11:29 AM | Report abuse

Hey, Liz, pretty brave of you mentioning George Washington! Why would anyone want one Brad Pitt dollar bill when you could order a whole sheet of Brangelina stamps instead?

Is that a picture of Larry King himself or of his Madame Tussaud figure? I can see his son Chance in the schoolyard now, trading his Dad card for two Mike Wallaces and a Barbara Walters.

Posted by: td | July 31, 2008 11:31 AM | Report abuse

On second thought, Liz Kelly, after reviewing the rest of the list, the Brad Pitt dollar is by far the least offensive item.

Posted by: byoolin hopes someone can get us a lock of Liz Taylor's deathbed hairdo. | July 31, 2008 11:39 AM | Report abuse

Darn, I wanted to buy Stevie Nicks' commemorative matchbook from her wedding to her late friend's husband, which happened so she could give her friend's daughter a mother. If only I'd known sooner.

Maybe I'll have better luck scoring one of the "Kate & Lance 4 Ever" collectable bike tires full of their hot air that they never got to give out.

Posted by: td | July 31, 2008 11:45 AM | Report abuse

"byoolin hopes someone can get us a lock of Liz Taylor's deathbed hairdo."

You just crack me up! Somewhere, right now, a guy in California is packing up his clippers and a supply of ziplock bags and racing to the hospital.

Posted by: td | July 31, 2008 11:50 AM | Report abuse

Darn, meant to say, "Somewhere, José Eber is..." etc.

Posted by: td | July 31, 2008 11:51 AM | Report abuse

*sigh*
the link nazis here are getting out of hand.

The first thing that popped into my head when I saw that Larry King card was "I'll bet that's what he'll look like if he has an open casket funeral...."

Posted by: b | July 31, 2008 11:51 AM | Report abuse

The trading cards are excellent! Why, in the same series as the Larry King card are such notable notables as Stacy Keibler, Gail Kim, Karen Lynn Gorney, William Fichtner, Cindy Morgan and Martin Klebba!

It's like the "Who's That?" of "Who's Who."

Posted by: byoolin just needs a 2007 Steve Guttenberg to complete a set in his bike's spokes. | July 31, 2008 11:52 AM | Report abuse

Comment of the day award should go to b for the first thing that popped into his head. Close second to td for the hair-collecting motorcyclist (and too bad he doesn't have one of those takeout boxes from the Urgent Blood place).

Posted by: byoolin | July 31, 2008 11:57 AM | Report abuse

You weren't kidding about Karen Lynn Gorney! It's not even "Saturday Night Fever" KLG, either. (Which, really, makes it even kitschier.)

Posted by: td would rather have a donna pescow card | July 31, 2008 11:59 AM | Report abuse

Hey now, byoo. I like William Fichtner, one of the best character actors out there.

All of these are disturbing. Donruss Celeb Cards? Are there any actual people out there investing in these things? Please tell me there aren't. Please. How sad do you have to be to need a trading card of Larry King? "I'll have one of those, and just go ahead and toss a 'Wally Cox' in the bag for me too..."

Posted by: NW DC | July 31, 2008 12:06 PM | Report abuse

thanks, byoo! but it's um, *her* head.

Posted by: b | July 31, 2008 12:06 PM | Report abuse

I think a person would have to be a
Dick Cheney to buy any of those items.

Posted by: dw | July 31, 2008 12:09 PM | Report abuse

Darn software messed up my message.

I think a person would have to be a
Dick ---- Cheney to buy any of those items.
I had just spaced several times between the VP's first and last names.

Posted by: dw | July 31, 2008 12:10 PM | Report abuse

MAN HOLDING DEAD PARROT: Excuse me, miss.

PET SHOP OWNER: What do you mean, "miss"?

MAN HOLDING DEAD PARROT: I'm sorry, I have a cold.


Posted by: byoolin would like to offer a similar apology to b. | July 31, 2008 12:12 PM | Report abuse

What? No pieces (in the pre war sense of the word) of Kathy Griffin for sale?

Posted by: Stick | July 31, 2008 12:21 PM | Report abuse

Hey, Liz Kelly, you'll be pleased to know that the folks over at Gawker apparently are fans. In fact, they loved this post so much that they stole the idea!

http://gawker.com/5031550/things-you-regret-missing-10-celebrity-ebay-items

Posted by: yeah, byoolin's a tattletale. So what. | July 31, 2008 1:33 PM | Report abuse

I want another of britney's farts in a tupperware on ebay. That was classic.

Posted by: Norm | July 31, 2008 1:39 PM | Report abuse

byoolin (at 11:29 AM), I take it you're not an aficionado of the art of J.S.G. Boggs, whom the Secret Service claim is a counterfeiter?

Posted by: Nosy Parker | July 31, 2008 2:36 PM | Report abuse

Nosy, after I googled his name, I realized I'd read about Boggs somewhere. The guy's a genius!

I'm also a fan of Michael Hernandez de Luna, the stamp guy.

Posted by: byoolin is not advocating ticking off the gub'mint, y'understand. | July 31, 2008 3:17 PM | Report abuse

That Spears "throw" went for over $100. Good grief.

Posted by: WDC 21113 | July 31, 2008 3:42 PM | Report abuse

down here in elvis country, they'll try to sell just about anything. it's frightening.

http://www.elvispresleynews.com/ElvisMemorabilia.html

Posted by: b | July 31, 2008 5:40 PM | Report abuse

That Spears "throw" went for over $100. Good grief.

Posted by: WDC 21113 | July 31, 2008 3:42 PM

Do they provide a certificate of authenticity?

Posted by: Anonymous | July 31, 2008 9:24 PM | Report abuse

Byoolin:

Not a single person, ever, has been prosecuted for sticking a different face on a dollar bill. You have to look past the act and examine the intent. Even if the intent was there, nobody wants public agencies spending thousands of dollars investigating piddling around with $1 bills where the most that can happen is a 4100 fine. hence, not a single person, ever.

Posted by: Zorro | August 2, 2008 5:44 PM | Report abuse

Oops - that should have read "$100 fine" and not "4100 fine. Sticky shift key.

Posted by: Zorro | August 2, 2008 5:47 PM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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