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Posted at 10:42 AM ET, 07/ 9/2008

Here's the Story of the Barfing Brady

By Liz Kelly

Listen up all you kid stars. You may be some kind of cute munchkin now, rocking little ringlets and ridiculously cute outfits. But there isn't any longevity in the adorable scamp game. Okay? If you're lucky, you may transition into adulthood unscathed. But for the rest of you, it's reality TV or bust. Luckily erstwhile littlest "Brady Bunch"-er Susan Olsen (Cindy) has stepped in to show us how to reinvent herself almost 40 years after she first charmed a generation of couch potatoes with her lispy cuteness.

Cindy was the cutest Brady, there's no denying it. But if you were a kid like me, cute was less likely to inspire admiration than to induce a wave of nausea. And, as it turns out, the now 47-year-old Olsen has managed to nauseate even herself.

And in one two-minute segment she's also single-handedly outdone the second acts of fellow "Brady" alums Barry Williams (the tell-all penner), Christopher Knight (the reality show-er) and Florence Henderson (the one who sells Wesson and Polident). She pulled off this feat during a recent interview with a Colorado morning radio show when she ran out of the studio to throw up. Yes, throw up. By way of explanation, the classy Olsen said he'd had too much wine the night before.

Let's go to the video. (Note: The footage is all talk, no barf -- so the squeamish have nothing to fear.):

Not one to shrink from the tough questions, Olsen -- who says she doesn't drink, yet seems to be gunning for an "Intervention" episode -- was openly hungover and barfing in front of her 10-year-old son, who had accompanied her to the studio. "That's the way kids learn," she said matter-of-factly. I only imagined the part where she pouted and stamped her foot, causing her perfect ringlets to bounce ever so slightly.

Added Olsen when asked if she'd vomited in the lav:

"Of course I threw up in the bathroom. It's better than throwing up on their face."

See, it all ends with a life lesson, just like the "Brady Bunch."

By Liz Kelly  | July 9, 2008; 10:42 AM ET
Categories:  Celebrities, Hollyweird, Miscellaneous  
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She says she's a very, very, very honest person who was hungover because she drank the night before but she doesn't drink. Wha?? That doesn't sound very, very, very honest to me.
And here's a question...why on earth was she doing a radio interview? Has she written a book? Is she starring in a new movie? Or is she just 'Cindy Brady all grown up' at this point in her life?
Two more things: her hair was aw-ful. Two toned, over-processed looking...
and in honor of who Susan Olson used to be...
Remember the episode when Mrs. "Lovey" Howell (not her real name) came to the Brady's house and Cindy thought she was a talent scout looking for the next Shirley Temple? That was a great storyline. Completely believable.

Posted by: methinks | July 9, 2008 11:13 AM | Report abuse

There doesn't seem to be a link to any video. Your link monkey is undermining you at every turn, Liz Kelly.

Posted by: byoolin | July 9, 2008 11:22 AM | Report abuse

Link is working here. Maybe it's just a WV thing.

Posted by: methinks | July 9, 2008 11:24 AM | Report abuse

sigh...the link nazis where i am are keeping me from seeing it...

Posted by: b | July 9, 2008 11:29 AM | Report abuse

Liz Kelly, I apologize to your link monkey. Like b, it appears the link nazis have done their dastardly work.

Posted by: byoolin curses the link nazis, apologizes to link monkey, listens to Link Wray. | July 9, 2008 11:39 AM | Report abuse

Wait, Cindy Brady is 47!!! Does that mean Greg is pushing 60? Or is my math all f'd up...

Posted by: still | July 9, 2008 11:45 AM | Report abuse

"Like b, it appears the link nazis have done their dastardly work."

That seems to imply that b has done dastardly work, which was not my intention. What I meant was that the link nazis have done the same to my internet connection as they have to b's.

To the extent that my remarks may have affected the execution of b's work, dastardly or not, I apologize.

Posted by: byoolin sometimes writes in ESL. | July 9, 2008 11:46 AM | Report abuse

I think the link nazis may have the right of it.

Posted by: Curmudgeon | July 9, 2008 11:46 AM | Report abuse

I live in Colorado Springs. The dj involved at the station is a convicted felon. There should be a story in that too.

Posted by: Mike | July 9, 2008 12:03 PM | Report abuse

thankyaveramuch, is my goal to keep all references to my dastardly work to a minimum. ...

Posted by: b | July 9, 2008 12:03 PM | Report abuse

At one time wasn't there an urban myth that Cindy was doing porn because she did not appear in some of the reunion movies.

Posted by: Cleveland Brown | July 9, 2008 12:34 PM | Report abuse

One look at that DJ and I want to throw up too.

Posted by: possum | July 9, 2008 12:48 PM | Report abuse

Cleveland Brown,

It was Jan, not Cindy, who didn't appear in the reunion movies. And the rumor got started she was doing porn because she had starred in the movie "Portrait of a Teenage Runaway" which had her character become a prostitute at one point.

There is no need for Jan Brady porn, anyway, as she often appeared braless on the "Brady Bunch" and that was all a 13 year old needed. Not that I would know.

Posted by: Days of Broken Arrows | July 9, 2008 12:56 PM | Report abuse

Wait, Cindy Brady is 47!!! Does that mean Greg is pushing 60? Or is my math all f'd up...

Posted by: still | July 9, 2008 11:45 AM


Not quite, still

Greg - 54
Marsha - 52
Peter - 51
Jan - 50
Bobby - 48
Cindy - 47

Posted by: The Brady Kids all Grown Up | July 9, 2008 1:10 PM | Report abuse

Dear Liz,

Please fix: "By way of explanation, the classy Olsen said he'd had too much wine the night before."

I believe you mean "she'd had too much wine" - got me all confused thinking that "she" had all of a sudden become a "he." (transsexual brady?)


Posted by: u street girl | July 9, 2008 1:18 PM | Report abuse

You mean a completely different and unrelated Olsen has insinuated herself into Celebritology? Ugh!

Posted by: rachelt | July 9, 2008 1:22 PM | Report abuse

Did anyone notice the Budweiser sign behind her head in the post-vomit interview? I think Suzie-Q is being interviewed in a bar!

Posted by: Anonymous | July 9, 2008 1:47 PM | Report abuse

I was once teaching a class to customers at work and had to run out and barf in the restroom. Mortifying, but it happens.

And no, it wasn't b/c I'd had too much wine -- I had food poisoning from the hotel breakfast I'd eaten.

Posted by: Californian | July 9, 2008 2:10 PM | Report abuse

Okay, I watched the clip (wow, usually those are blocked by The Man, always keeping a slacker down) but without sound. Does she still lithp?

And ditto on the she's 47?? I thought she was bratty little twerp on the show, and yet she's just a year younger than me. Raise your hand if you wanted to snatch the little ringlets right off her blonde head.

Posted by: epony | July 9, 2008 2:18 PM | Report abuse

epony, it's a downright dirty rotten shame when work interferes with our ability to Celebritologize! Employers need to get their priorities worked out.

Posted by: Nosy Parker | July 9, 2008 2:41 PM | Report abuse

"By way of explanation, the classy Olsen said he'd had too much wine the night before."

I assume you meant to say "she'd had too much wine the night before." Otherwise, Susan Olsen has a whole lot more goin' on than barfin'.

Posted by: Um ... | July 9, 2008 3:27 PM | Report abuse

Nope, according to the audio, Cindy had a good dose of Lithp-No-More.

Posted by: methinks | July 9, 2008 3:34 PM | Report abuse

Methinks writes:

"Nope, according to the audio, Cindy had a good dose of Lithp-No-More."

Phew! Excellent!

Posted by: Sasquatch | July 9, 2008 3:45 PM | Report abuse

I didn't know they had "mint potato stew" in Colorado.

And is it just me or do you find the concept of "mint potato stew" pukeworthy even without the spectre of having been sprayed with pesticide?

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | July 9, 2008 4:09 PM | Report abuse



DJ/girlfriend Samantha Ronson paid nearly $22,000 for a Cartier diamond ring for Lindsay Lohan on Monday. The two were out in Los Angeles window shopping, when Ronson, 30, bought the ring as a birthday gift for Lohan, Britain's The Daily Mirror reports.

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | July 9, 2008 4:15 PM | Report abuse

It's just you, MoCoSnarky. Liberal quantities of fresh mint are added to Portuguese Sopas, which contains mainly slow-cooked beef, potatoes and kale or cabbage, with broth served over bread.

Posted by: Yummmm | July 9, 2008 4:15 PM | Report abuse

Mint potato stew? No, thanks.

I'm holding out for these:

Posted by: Yum! | July 9, 2008 4:27 PM | Report abuse

If you really want some good recipes, like tater-tot casserole etc, you need to go to the Taste of Home website. They also have a hilarious message board full to the brim with MMs.

Posted by: possum | July 9, 2008 4:39 PM | Report abuse

Possum - the Taste of Home website is hysterical! I'm going to join the "June Cleaver club" and learn how to make some "Cheese on the Cob" or "4th of July pizza."

Posted by: Groovis is like Marge Simpson in a June Cleaver world | July 9, 2008 4:53 PM | Report abuse

I dont' know. I think the kids would have learned pretty good if she'd puked on them.

Posted by: LLL | July 9, 2008 5:02 PM | Report abuse

The Taste of Home site has a June Cleaver Club! That pretty much sums it up for me....

Posted by: Angela | July 9, 2008 5:09 PM | Report abuse

I dare you to go on Taste of Home saying your common law DH just bagged a coon and how do you remove the scent glands?

Posted by: possum | July 9, 2008 5:39 PM | Report abuse

Or better yet, to say that your same-sex SO did.

Posted by: Anonymous | July 9, 2008 5:44 PM | Report abuse

I'm a total sucker for food blogs/sites of all kinds. I love this crock pot site. Gluten-free cheesecake in a crock pot, anyone?

I also read The Noble Pig site, which is actually a really nice site. But I was simultaneously horrified and in hysterics over the July 8 post describing the trip where the blogger stopped at a McDonald's and let her little sons use the bathroom--where they interrupted the French fry boy and a middle-aged man having sex in the one stall.

Posted by: alex | July 9, 2008 6:01 PM | Report abuse

Oh my goodness. I thought it was Burger King that says "Have it your way."

Posted by: possum | July 9, 2008 8:06 PM | Report abuse

I am a proud owner of a best of Brady Bunch CD (I know, oxymoron).

The CD is a compilation of the celinediony albums they forced those poor kids to record during the 70s after "It's a Sunshine Day" was such a big-deal episode and someone smelled Partridge Family.

You haven't lived until you've heard Susan Olson lisp her way through . . . um, hey, who took my Brady CD? I can't find it anywhere and it should be right next to Barry Williams' Eminem parody "The Real Greg Brady" hmmm . . . "All I Want for Christmas," I think. It's so, so awful.

Posted by: td is younger than cindy brady | July 9, 2008 8:54 PM | Report abuse

You just rocked my world with that crockpot site! Especially since nearly all of her recipes are gluten-free!

Posted by: mouse | July 9, 2008 9:36 PM | Report abuse

Alex, I love food blogs too. I love to cook and, like with Lizards, the comments usually don't get too far into MM territory. My current favorites are and Although this seems a strange topic to follow a story about a barfing Brady.

Posted by: Angela | July 9, 2008 10:20 PM | Report abuse

i just checked out the crockpot blog. hilarious and many gluten free recipes. a wonderful combination!

Posted by: methinks | July 10, 2008 8:29 AM | Report abuse

For a good GF baking site, try:

They also have TONS of links to other GF sites.

I have a nephew with Crohn's and my sister cooks that way for the whole family. I merely have an intolerance for gluten. I'm really not supposed to eat any of it, but I only lasted 2 years being totally GF. Now, I do OK as long as I'm very careful.

Thanks for those other sites, Angela. I'm bookmarking them, too!

Posted by: alex | July 10, 2008 2:23 PM | Report abuse

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