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Posted at 7:39 AM ET, 08/19/2008

Morning Mix: 50 Cent is Top Hip-Hop Cash King -- Forbes

By Liz Kelly
Tuesday

Headlines: 50 Cent knocks Jay-Z off top of the Forbes "Hip-Hop Cash Kings" list... Laurence Fishburne joining "CSI" cast... Jennifer Lopez trains for triathlon... Phil Collins pays out $46.7 million in divorce settlement... Britney Spears owes over $300K, says one-time lawyer... Kanye West calls Scarlett Johansson his "favorite white girl"... Christina Applegate says she's free of breast cancer... Singer Annie Lennox recovering from spinal surgery... Gwyneth Paltrow lends her image to designer who works with fur... Heidi Montag releases new unfortunate single... "90210"'s Ian Ziering preps for demanding new role... Donnie Wahlberg and wife file for divorce.

Pix: Lily Allen gets punchy... Helena Bonham Carter wears weird shoes.

Crime Watch: Gary Glitter released from Vietnam prison.

Rumor Mill: Patrick Swayze caught smoking?... No breast augmentation for Paris Hilton, says rep... Is Rihanna broke?

Say What?
"...Angelina Jolie and her vacuous hubby Brad Pitt make about $40 million a year in violent, psychopathic movies and give away three of it to starving children, trying to look as if they give a crap about humanity as they spit out more dunces that will consume more than their fair share and wreck the earth even more." -- Roseanne, obviously not a fan, blogs about Brangelina

By Liz Kelly  | August 19, 2008; 7:39 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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Comments

Good morning everyone!

Congrats to Christina Applegate on the remission, a resounding "ouch" in reference to Annie Lennox's surgery, and in regards to Lily Allen- maybe she was just showing off some of her favorite dance moves, ok?

Posted by: Sully | August 19, 2008 9:01 AM | Report abuse

Good old Roseanne - never one to mince words

Posted by: Curmudgeon | August 19, 2008 9:06 AM | Report abuse

Finally Kanye and I agree on something.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 9:09 AM | Report abuse

If a white star made a blog titled "My fave black girl" like Kanye West did, don't you think some people would be up in arms?

Posted by: Just wondering | August 19, 2008 9:11 AM | Report abuse

Helena Bonham Carter wears weird shoes.

**************************************

Ya know, after yesterday's main post I thought this link would be about something completely different.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 9:14 AM | Report abuse

I had the same thought, Dorkus.

I think I saw an infomercial for those shoes once. I kind of want a pair...

Posted by: Sully | August 19, 2008 9:17 AM | Report abuse

Wow, Roseanne...how many stones do you have stored up in your glass house? I imagine Jolie and Pitt are probably donating about what you make in a year.

Posted by: 23112 | August 19, 2008 9:18 AM | Report abuse

Never crazy about Roseanne, but she's spot-on there.

Posted by: rachelt | August 19, 2008 9:18 AM | Report abuse

My heart goes out to Christina Applegate, who had a double mastecomy to clear the cancer in one breast and to protect herself from getting it in the other one, while being only three years older than me.

Posted by: Betty | August 19, 2008 9:24 AM | Report abuse

Thank you Roseanne for finally calling Brangelina to the carpet. The two of them have come to sicken me. It started with the skeevy way they got together, but it was cemented by the "let's adopt the world's children" motif. I was especially annoyed by their stated desire to get another 'Asian' brother for Maddox. Ethnicity doesn't mean they'll get along. It all seems so naive. Are they supposed to gang up on the rest of the kids and form an Asian mafia. She's well on her way to becoming a Mia Farrow. Let's just hope Brad doesn't become a Woody.

Posted by: CG | August 19, 2008 9:24 AM | Report abuse

"...Brad doesn't become a Woody."

hehehehehehehehehehe

Posted by: Anonymous | August 19, 2008 9:29 AM | Report abuse

While Helena's shoes are "weird" to say the least, what about the REST OF HER OUTFIT?! She looks a hot mess!

Posted by: Anonymous | August 19, 2008 9:29 AM | Report abuse

Heart Christina! Stay strong. You made the right decision to protect yourself - I wonder if I could do it?

Kanye, Heincer, Rosanne - Shut up already.

Lily - go to rehab already.

Helena Bonham Carter's shoes (no really) - I just saw a woman wearing these shoes right here in Po Dunk, NC not a week or so ago, so they can't be all that new or unusual.

Posted by: sunnydaze | August 19, 2008 9:29 AM | Report abuse

When mentioning something Kanye wrote on his blog, why not a link directly to the source - his blog - instead of a write up of it on some other news site?

Posted by: jEN8 | August 19, 2008 9:31 AM | Report abuse

I love Roseanne. She just goes and says whatever she wants - you go, girl!

Posted by: jaybbub | August 19, 2008 9:36 AM | Report abuse

-Laugh now by next month, those shoes will be all over the mall and college campuses.

-I wish Kanye will just be quiet for once.

-I saw Christina Applegate on GMA. Much love and support for her.

Posted by: Lisa1 | August 19, 2008 9:42 AM | Report abuse

Thanks for the INO link!
:)

Posted by: Vera | August 19, 2008 9:43 AM | Report abuse

If Rihanna is broke, then perhaps Chris Brown is helping to foot the bills? They were spotted yesterday in a jewelry store in Richmond, looking at rings…

Posted by: Anonymous | August 19, 2008 9:46 AM | Report abuse

*Though I didn't agree with most of Roseanne's comments, I too am on the record with having a problem with Angelina's choice of movie roles (the shoot 'em up action kind) given Angelina's concern for humanitarian causes. I won't rewrite my past comments but I wish she would hang up her guns (the shoot 'em up kind) and make movies where she actually has to rely on her ability to act, emote, etc.
That said, it looks to me like Angelina and Brad are loving, doting, Cheetos-loving parents. The amount of money they've given away is extraordinary, they use their celebrity for good and not for evil. And that's cool.
*HBC's shoes (the kind on her feet) are so fugly that it's funny.
*Swayze, please don't waste all the good vibes and swayzelove you've gotten by smoking. It's a hard habit to break, but it's worth it.
*And finally...Gwyneth...wow...whatever you were smoking that made you think becoming the "face" for a designer who uses fur was a good idea...you need to give it up.

Posted by: methinks | August 19, 2008 9:51 AM | Report abuse

a. jennifer lopez-jack of all trades, master of none. she's tiring, boring, enough. go away.
b. laughed out loud while reading roseanne's comments. she hit the proverbial nail on the head. love her take down. delicious.
c. good wishes flying to christina applegate. taking a great deal of courage to get through her problems.
d. smoking is so difficult to stop. patrick swayze being the latest example. disheartening.
e. is rihanna broke? does anyone care?
f. is phil collins's current former spouse a former nanny or was it former wife #2? hasn't he heard of a pre-nup? or was there one and this is what she gets? well, ladies, he's now looking for #4!
g. kanye west can rap, but someone needs to rap him along his head. in this case, his phrasing is off.

Posted by: janet ponders today's entries | August 19, 2008 9:58 AM | Report abuse

Z-Coil shoes for double D support

Posted by: omni | August 19, 2008 10:00 AM | Report abuse

Thank you, Omni. I was beginning to think I was the only one awake at 2 am to see the entire Z-Coil infomercial. I believe that Helena's rocking the Taos Strap, in black.

It's like walking on air and according to the testimonials, they cure everything from rhumatism to scoliosis.

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | August 19, 2008 10:24 AM | Report abuse

We have to put Phil Collins on the Heather Mills Watch List.

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | August 19, 2008 10:26 AM | Report abuse

Roseanne is a crass, ignorant boor. She's Rosie O'Donnell for the 80s crowd.

That said, people seem to be responding to her rant re: Brangelina, and completely forgetting that this is the woman who grabbed her crotch during the national anthem, accused gay people of being self-centered, and has been nipped and tucked more than an amish quilt. Seriously? This is your mouthpiece for your Brangie hatin'?

So here's what I want to know: why do folks single out the people who ARE DOING SOMETHING and bash them for the way they do it, rather than picking on the rich people who do nothing but entertain themselves with all their money?

Posted by: WDC | August 19, 2008 10:28 AM | Report abuse

Am I the only one having major Byoolin withdrawal? It's gonna be a long week....

Posted by: jaybbub | August 19, 2008 10:28 AM | Report abuse

Perhaps Angelina takes those shoot-'em-up roles because one doesn't have to act, just re-act.

Posted by: Curmudgeon should be an entertainment agent | August 19, 2008 10:29 AM | Report abuse

Roseanne, if what you say is true you are the pot to the Jolie-Pitts kettle.

I don't recall any of Roseanne's charitable works but I do recall that she has 4 or 5 dunces herself.

Posted by: jes | August 19, 2008 10:33 AM | Report abuse

To jaybub: yes, you are.

Posted by: Anonymous | August 19, 2008 10:34 AM | Report abuse

If JLo trains adequately, she could easily do the classic route at the Malibu Triathlon. It features a half-mile ocean swim, an 18 mile out-and-back bike course, and a 4-mile out-and-back run course.

What would really be impressive is if she did the olympic route! That features a 1.5K Pacific Ocean swim, a 40K out-and-back bike course along the Pacific Coast Highway, and a 10K out-and-back run course.

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | August 19, 2008 10:34 AM | Report abuse

To jaybub: no, you're not

(so there)

Posted by: Curmudgeon | August 19, 2008 10:35 AM | Report abuse

I have to hand it to Lawrence Fishburn. Not everyone can say they've gone from Cowboy Curtis on "Pee-Wee's Playhouse" to The Professor on "CSI."

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | August 19, 2008 10:36 AM | Report abuse

Just Wondering, I thought the exact same thing about Kanye's comments. Racism is racism no matter who is talking. There are not separate rules for what is acceptable based on race. I said the same thing when we debated the n word.

Roseanne probably was not the best person to say it. But, she does have a point. Of course, Angelina does these incredibly violent movies so she can 1) avoid showing she can't act worth a damn and 2) make a lot of money so she can brag about how much she gives away.

As for the comment about getting another "asian" child, that just shows how dumb Angelina is. You don't pick a kid like you pick up some TP at the grocery store. Also, all Asians are not just one ethnicity. They are a a variety of ethnicities who do NOT all get along. In fact, there are some strong historic hatreds that would give a whole new meaning to sibling rivalry. So, the enlightened "world" citizen is actually very ignorant of the world as it is.

Posted by: ep | August 19, 2008 10:45 AM | Report abuse

to jaybub: no, you're not. the sorrow for byoolin's absence leads in votes 2-1.
it's being reported that madonna was disappointed in her birthday turnout. 2 of her bff, ms. fur loving paltrow and stella mccartney no showed. sob.
anne hathaway recently said she has a finely tuned b.s. detector? really? then how did it come to pass that you posed naked and didn't get the negatives/disc/photos? and really? then why did you spend all that time w/the soon to be convicted and incarcerated raffaelo follieri?????
and as to roseanne, whether she's the pot calling the kettle black is irrelevant. she's still right. and she's never held herself out to be anything other than what she is. and that's not bashing.

Posted by: janet sticks up for roseanne | August 19, 2008 10:50 AM | Report abuse

I notice that the link to the story about JLo's training doesn't mention her off-air comments:
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26272630/
Apparently she doesn't get why everybody's talking about "that swimmer."

Posted by: mouse | August 19, 2008 10:50 AM | Report abuse

Look, I'm not a fan of Angelina's movies (especially since they usually involve a lot of action violence) and because the other stuff she's done doesn't really appeal to me, but I don't get the Angie bashing.
She gives away a ton of money. She lends her celebrity to good causes. She seems to do right by her family (her children, her SO). What's the deal?
Sure, I've snarked on her clothes (especially the muddy colored maxi dress she wore in New Orleans earlier this year) and the fact that she gives her kids Cheetos (yes, I like them, but nutritionally? C'mon. Cheese isn't supposed to go "crunch") but I think for the really important things in life, she's probably as self absorbed as any regular schmoe.

Posted by: methinks | August 19, 2008 10:59 AM | Report abuse

Mark Glover, director of Respect for Animals, said: "Gwyneth Paltrow should be ashamed. I can only assume that Paltrow either is ignorant of the facts or lacks human decency and compassion."

This guy may be a knucklehead, but her really brings the snark! If only he had said "the *insouciant* Gwyneth Paltrow ...

Posted by: other liz | August 19, 2008 11:00 AM | Report abuse

Hmm, jelous much Mizz Barr? There's a big difference between a fraggin' movie and real life, yesh.

Could someone please make Heidi stop tourturing the Pro Tools rig?

Posted by: EricS | August 19, 2008 11:01 AM | Report abuse

Agreed, other liz. That "ignorant or lacking human decency & compassion" was a great line.

Posted by: methinks | August 19, 2008 11:03 AM | Report abuse

I just read the Christina Applegate item (actually, I saw it from another source), and I'm a little teary-eyed right now. My mom went through the same procedure under almost the same circumstances many, many years ago (could it be two decades now?) and I remember the emotional trauma that it caused. It was the right, smart thing to do, and she's been cancer-free ever since, but still a hard, hard decision. I'm very proud of Christina being open, public, and making a cause out of her circumstances, and I'll always be a fan because of it.

Posted by: 23112 | August 19, 2008 11:06 AM | Report abuse

MoCo, I'll see you Cowboy Curtis and raise you Reba, the mail lady a/k/a Lt. Anita Van Buren on Law & Order.

Yes, jaybub, I miss him too.

Posted by: jake e. poo | August 19, 2008 11:09 AM | Report abuse

Re: the comments about Kanye's favorite white woman-- it's not 'racist' to find certain types attractive or to identify people who fit your own definition of sexy based on categories. Personal preferences are allowed to take into account race, sex, age, aesthetic appeal, IQ, height, weight, or whatever else a person chooses.

Posted by: sox | August 19, 2008 11:09 AM | Report abuse

David Beckham, the Musical

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20220047,00.html

Posted by: Oh, for the love of .... | August 19, 2008 11:11 AM | Report abuse

ep, AJ has won a handful of Golden Globes, and an OSCAR. So how do you figure she can't act?

Again, I want to know why people single her out. She CAN act, and has the knickknacks to prove it. She gives away tons of money. She gives a loving home to children who wouldn't otherwise have one. In my book, these are the hallmarks of a good person. What's your criteria?

Criticism about her choice of roles is valid. But to say that she makes money so that she can "brag about giving it away" is just asinine.

I'm sure there are others more deserving of your contempt.

Posted by: WDC | August 19, 2008 11:13 AM | Report abuse

jake.e.poo, don't forget that S. Epatha Merkerson was Tony-nominated this year for the lead in the Broadway revival of "Come Back, Little Sheba." And she also sings!

Yes, I miss the vacationing Byoolin, but I also miss other regulars when they're away, too.

Posted by: Nosy Parker | August 19, 2008 11:16 AM | Report abuse

You're correct, WDC. There are others who are more deserving of our contempt.

It's just that Ms Angelina's name came up this morning, that's all.

Posted by: Curmudgeon | August 19, 2008 11:16 AM | Report abuse

OK, I have admitted before that I have a little bit of a girl crush on Angelina, so I may be biased a little bit. I don't have any problem with snarking on her at all since she really does bring it on herself, and yes, she does a lot of action films that involve much, much violence. But, that said, she also won an oscar for Girl Interrupted, which was not an action flick. She was nominated for many awards for A Mighty Heart (and maybe won a Critics Choice?) And there is a lot of talk about her performance in Changling, directed by Clint Eastwood who doesn't normally work with folks who "can't act." So, you know, I'm just sayin'.

Oh, and I am sure that she feeds her kids real food, at least sometimes, but I am sure that the Cheetos haters never, ever let their kids have junk food snacks...

Posted by: sunnydaze | August 19, 2008 11:18 AM | Report abuse

She's well on her way to becoming a Mia Farrow.

***
I don't get the hating on Mia Farrow, if that's what this was. Mia Farrow has adopted from different countries, but also several special needs kids, and she didn't go around publicizing her adoptions. In fact, if her ex-boyfriend hadn't married one of those kids (ew), we probably wouldn't be that aware of it.

Posted by: Ame | August 19, 2008 11:27 AM | Report abuse

She admitted she does the violent movies just for the money. Which she then makes sure that everyone knows to the penny how much she gives away.

I still say that anytime all I see on the screen is the actress and not the role, I say they can't act. Oh look, Angelina is doing a serious role, see she has her serious face on. Which is exactly like her, I am going to blow you away face. Which is exactly like her, not this for dinner again face.

I don't care how much hardware she has, her range is limited. Now she is doing the accent thing to be interesting. Uuugh. I hate when actors do that.

Oh and I don't think she is all that great a parent either. The only reason she has all those kids is to show her dad that you can parent and be a working actor at the same time.

Sure there are people more deserving of my contempt. But, this is celebritology, so I get to show my contempt for certain celebrities here.

Posted by: ep | August 19, 2008 11:29 AM | Report abuse

lol - in agreement with Curmudgeon. Come back tomorrow, WDC, we'll be jumping someone else's train.

Posted by: racheltq | August 19, 2008 11:29 AM | Report abuse

WDC
You are 100% correct in your defense of Angie. She is a very well respected actress, gives a lot back to the community, has many charitable organizations, and is one of the most decent people in Hollywood.
People on this chat have a list of "unskarkable" people who have never giving a dime to anyone and would probably spit on their face if they said hi, but then get all over one of the few people in Hollywood trying to do the right thing.
Do you ever notice that 99% of the Angie bashers are women. I think the green monster rears its ugly head.

Posted by: anon | August 19, 2008 11:30 AM | Report abuse

Hey anon - maybe we're not Angie Bashers...maybe we're just closet Roseanne Barr supporters! And we've just been waiting for years for her to come out and snark so Liz can pick up a thread and post it on her site. Where's a luvsroseanne when you need her? Nobody's rising to her defense. Maybe you're just jealous of her - did ya ever think of that? (Alright I'll stop now - I can't stand either of them.)

Posted by: rachelt | August 19, 2008 11:36 AM | Report abuse

I dunno, maybe the AJ hate is that love hate thing - I'd love to be her so I hate her for already being what I covet to be. MAYbe - despite their efforts they can't really stop what is written about what they do in terms of their charity, so I don't believe all the comments on their charitable actions are them self promoting. I think they also see that it might be worth a little public cricism from snarkers to shine a light in places where folks aren't paying attention (simply by being a celebrity and being there). Plus rather than compare them to what we think they should be doing (DONATE 60% of your bazillions or I'll think you are greedy) how about comparing them to their peers in terms of celebrity and wealth.

How much do the crazy cruises donate in terms of time and wealth (and no Katiebot donations to Versace do NOT count).

From what I have read the idea about adopting other children from other cultures is about having someone else that has a similar face to you so that they don't lose some of their heritage. Now I can't speak if a child adopted from Thailand hates a child adopted from Vietnam - but I can get the idea of gaining comfort from having someone who 'looks like me'.

Posted by: LTL | August 19, 2008 11:39 AM | Report abuse

"Oh, and I am sure that she feeds her kids real food, at least sometimes, but I am sure that the Cheetos haters never, ever let their kids have junk food snacks..."

Sunnydaze, I hope you understand that my anti-Cheetos comments are made with tongue firmly planted in metaphorically Cheeto- filled cheek.
She can feed her kids whatever she wants...I just think "Cheetos, cheese that goes crunch" is one of the funniest taglines ever.

Posted by: methinks | August 19, 2008 11:39 AM | Report abuse

I'd just once like to meet/see/read about someone with "Rose" in their name who doesn't act like a jackass.

and janet stole my anne hathaway comment!

Posted by: b used to think rose was a nice name | August 19, 2008 11:41 AM | Report abuse

Hey LTL,

Never let common sense get in the way of a celebritology discussion.
Comparison to other celebrities:
Angie and Brad give a LOT more money to charity then most. (or is it more then ALL others in Hollywood)
Traveling the world and trying to make things better is Asia and Africa. Angie does a LOT more then most. (or is it more then ALL others)
And about the violence in her movies. Let me say it so some of you can understand.
Movies are not real. Sorry to burst your buble. I had better not mention Santa.

Posted by: anon | August 19, 2008 11:45 AM | Report abuse

You know possibly the love hate thing with AJ also has to do with feeling envy over her'having it all'(beauty, wealth, a handsome husband, a family, etc).

But now that I think about it, I have a a loving dad that I respect tremendously who is always there for me, I still have my mom to go to for advice and I don't have something inside my head whipping me to self starvation, so I guess I'll stop assuming she's got it all.

Posted by: LTL | August 19, 2008 11:46 AM | Report abuse

LTL,
I was agreeing with you by the way. I don't think my earlier post came out that way

Posted by: anon | August 19, 2008 11:46 AM | Report abuse

Ok, I'm treading lightly here so as not to incur the wrath of ep.

I've never really been a fan of AJ (although I love Hackers), I've just never found her movies to appeal to me. I never got into Tomb Raider and Wanted was much better as a graphic novel. But I can't really fault her taking a movie role to make money, everyone does it (see Swayze, Patrick-Dirty Dancing Havana Nights).

She and Mr. Pitt do seem to at least try to be well informed on the topics they discuss, so that's a plus in my book. They at least try to use their celebrity for good.

I will agree that schlepping the kiddos around the world is not what I would do, but they are still fairly young so I don't think it will affect them all that much.

So yeah, she's a little weird (we all knew that), but at least she wears underwear when she goes out and isn't putting out horrible singles about overdosing on love.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 11:50 AM | Report abuse

Dorkus,

Do you have any emperical knowledge about Angelina's 'going out' underware habits?

Share

Posted by: Curmudgeon | August 19, 2008 11:54 AM | Report abuse

byoolin's away and the troll messages here disappear

Posted by: coincidence? | August 19, 2008 11:54 AM | Report abuse

Do you have any emperical knowledge about Angelina's 'going out' underware habits?

Share

Posted by: Curmudgeon | August 19, 2008 11:54 AM

************************************

If only 'Mudge, if only....

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 11:56 AM | Report abuse

What are you implying, "coincidence?" ????
Our byoolin's not a troll!
A troll magnet, maybe.
That's like a babe magnet except the babes have goggly-eyes and multicolored hair that sticks straight up.

Posted by: methinks | August 19, 2008 11:57 AM | Report abuse

the babes have goggly-eyes and multicolored hair that sticks straight up.

Posted by: methinks | August 19, 2008 11:57 AM

***************************************

That could be several of my neighbors.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 11:58 AM | Report abuse

can you really call someone else a troll if you won't own your own post? hmmmm....

Posted by: rachelt | August 19, 2008 11:58 AM | Report abuse

Ok, I was going to let it go. I really was, but then...

"The only reason she has all those kids is to show her dad that you can parent and be a working actor at the same time."

ep, do you have kids? I have to assume you do not, because to have children is to be a fundamentally different person. Your life is complicated by a factor of 10, and you just don't care. I haven't had a pain-free day in over a year (aching back from carrying the gear, biceps on fire from holding a fretful baby through the night, and don't get me started on the breastfeeding pain), my house is a wreck, I've had two nights out in the last six months... and I'm cool with it.

What I'm saying is, you don't become a parent "just because". And you certainly don't do it six (or five, since those last ones were a two-fer) times over. This ain't like the Paris Hiltons of the world, who can't keep track of the purse-dog-of-the-week. No one would has had their lives turned as thoroughly upside-down as a new parent has would ever say that six kids is a good revenge strategy.

Posted by: WDC | August 19, 2008 12:04 PM | Report abuse

Not to worry Anon 11:45 I gotcha...

Posted by: LTL | August 19, 2008 12:04 PM | Report abuse

I can no longer tell the difference between Rosanne and Rosie O'Donnell

Posted by: Amelia | August 19, 2008 12:12 PM | Report abuse

Amelia, Rosie never slept with Tom Arnold.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 12:13 PM | Report abuse

Amelia, Rosie never slept with Tom Arnold.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 12:13 PM
------------------------------------------

And that could explain a lot, bitter-wise.

Posted by: Curmudgoen | August 19, 2008 12:14 PM | Report abuse

Dorkus:

How do you know that? The same way you know about Angelina's underwear?

Brangelina annoys me, too. Get married already, and pick a country - any country- in which to raise your children.

Posted by: Amelia | August 19, 2008 12:16 PM | Report abuse

BREAKING INAPPROPRIATE TELETHON OUTBURST NEWS:

Kanye West hates ugly white women.

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | August 19, 2008 12:17 PM | Report abuse

Amelia, I only base it on the fact that they were once married.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 12:20 PM | Report abuse

"I thought, 'What can I do to make my babies proud?' I think about what they'll think about the year they were born — who I was and what I did," she told Self. "It's important to me to set examples for them. I want to lead with my life," said Jennifer Lopez, in response to a questions about why she is undertaking a triathlon 6 months after birthing twins, while she is several pounds over her pre-pregnancy weight.

Posted by: Sasquatch has no need to add any snark | August 19, 2008 12:23 PM | Report abuse

No...Dorkus! I meant:

How do you know that the other one NEVER slept with Tom Arnold (I know the one who married him probably did).

Maybe they both did. Simultaneously. And that's why he's so stupid - his brain was crushed.

Posted by: Amelia | August 19, 2008 12:23 PM | Report abuse

If Gwyneth Paltrow now thinks that wearing fur is okay, does that mean she will let herself go hirsute around the hoo-hah?

Posted by: Sasquatch waxes insouciant | August 19, 2008 12:28 PM | Report abuse

(shudder)....Amelia, please some of us are trying to eat our lunch here, I really don't want the image of Rosie-Roseanne-and Tom in my head.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 12:28 PM | Report abuse

I had better not mention Santa.

Posted by: anon | August 19, 2008 11:45 AM

What about him?

Posted by: jes | August 19, 2008 12:28 PM | Report abuse

Hey Sas' i hear once you go hirsute the rest is moot.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 12:29 PM | Report abuse

Interesting discussion of values on a CELEB blog!!!!!

Posted by: Funny | August 19, 2008 12:30 PM | Report abuse

Thank you for your wisdom, Sasquatch.

I was afraid that Dorkus was alone out there among the luvangie people.

We need to lock arms (or whatever you use for arms) and form a snark chain of luuv that will reach from sea to shining sea and then across the shining sea to Asia where we'll pick up a kid for Angie and into the Middle East where we'll duck for cover. Then, on to Africa where we'll eat Big Macs while observing the famine. Finally our linked appendages will meet somewhere over the Bermuda Triangle . . .

What the h*ll am I talking about???

Posted by: Curmudgeon goes to lie down for awhile | August 19, 2008 12:30 PM | Report abuse

Dorkus sez:

"Hey Sas' i hear once you go hirsute the rest is moot."

That's right. Just ask Santa Claus.

Posted by: Sasquatch | August 19, 2008 12:31 PM | Report abuse

Britney Spears should really pay that legal bill. You know she and K-Fed will end up litigating custody issues again and again before those kids turn 18, and she'll need good lawyers. She can't afford to be on the divorce bar's blacklist.

And Phil Collins: next time, get a prenup.

Posted by: new england | August 19, 2008 12:31 PM | Report abuse

Phil Collins HAS $46.7 million?

Posted by: Paul | August 19, 2008 12:32 PM | Report abuse

Liz, please put up the main post. It's getting kinda ugly around here.

Posted by: Anonymous | August 19, 2008 12:32 PM | Report abuse

Can we talk about Phil's $46.7 MILLION divorce settlement? Does he really have this kind of money? Can he afford to marry, procreate, and divorce again? These are burning questions that need answers people.

Posted by: jes | August 19, 2008 12:33 PM | Report abuse

Rihanna is broke? Here's a way for her to make some easy money: Marry Phil Collins before someone else becomes Future Ex-Wife Number 4. Better hurry. Phil has only $280 million left after his payouts to three ex-wives.

Posted by: Sasquatch | August 19, 2008 12:34 PM | Report abuse

Phil Collins HAS $46.7 million?

Posted by: Paul | August 19, 2008 12:32 PM


Correction: Phil Collins HAD $46.7 million.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 12:34 PM | Report abuse

If we're to believe Kayne West, Phil Collins will go black and not look back for Wife Number 4.

Posted by: Sasquatch | August 19, 2008 12:36 PM | Report abuse

Dorkus sez:

"Hey Sas' i hear once you go hirsute the rest is moot."


The rest of what is moot?

Posted by: Curmudgeon | August 19, 2008 12:37 PM | Report abuse

"The rest of what is moot?"

Life......

....which happens to be a sandwich I did not order.

Posted by: Sasquatch the pinhead | August 19, 2008 12:40 PM | Report abuse

Okay, one last Angelina comment. I find the idea of getting another asian kid so that the one she already has will have someone who looks like him, horribly offensive. No, they don't all look alike. It is only self-centered westerners who believe that the Asian nations are interchangeable and a monolithic block in looks. They all have differences and they don't all look alike. So, if Ms. "I'm so informed about the world and its problems" can't even get that basic fact, she ain't all that informed in my book.

Oh and no, I don't have kids. Because I know I don't have the time or patience kids have. I still stand by my statement that she only had those kids to prove something to her dad. Sometimes, parents do that. How many teenage girls have kids only to get the welfare check? Or to have someone to love them unconditionally? Lots of parents have kids for really bad reasons and then are stuck with the very real consequences of having their lives turned upside down. Angelina just has more money to keep the chaos away from her if she doesn't want to deal with it.

Posted by: ep | August 19, 2008 12:43 PM | Report abuse

ep has a point - Angelina didn't act so weird when she only had the first child and spoke about filming a movie in his country and having a connection, etc. And she only had him for quite a while (3 or 4 years) but once she hooked up with Pitt she suddenly became all about grabbing children from all over the place and it seems like she is trying to make some kind of point.

It's not the number of children she has - it's the way she talks (brags) about how she's "assembling" her family. She's trying to prove something.

And the weird, living all over the world wasn't going on when before she hooked up with the Pitt.

Posted by: Amelia | August 19, 2008 12:49 PM | Report abuse

Angelina and Madonna are competing to see who can be the first to collect the entire set of designer orphans. The question is who will be first to break Mia Farrow's record.

Posted by: Sasquatch | August 19, 2008 12:51 PM | Report abuse

"We were late because we got a ticket by the tunnel! The police told the driver to pull over. I was sleeping in the back, and I'm like, What are we doing sitting on the side of the road?! I gotta be on the air in 15 minutes! Let us go! They didn't really see me, though. We took the ticket, then drove there as fast as we could." J.Lo.

So you think that the cop would/should have let your driver off the hook if he knew that it was your car?! Comments like these make me want to become a cop so that I can write tickets to celebrities.

Posted by: Mz Fitz | August 19, 2008 12:57 PM | Report abuse

"Hey Sas' i hear once you go hirsute the rest is moot."

I agree 10000000000% with that. RRRRRRRrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by: Ms. Snatchquatch | August 19, 2008 12:58 PM | Report abuse

I got some sort of message about an hour or so ago when I tried to post a comment. I guess I posted more than my quota today. I don't think that's quite fair. What's up with that?

Posted by: methinks | August 19, 2008 1:15 PM | Report abuse

I got some sort of message about an hour or so ago when I tried to post a comment. I guess I posted more than my quota today. I don't think that's quite fair. What's up with that?

Posted by: methinks | August 19, 2008 1:15 PM

You are a pretentious bore. Give it a rest.

Posted by: Up this | August 19, 2008 1:19 PM | Report abuse

The fact that a guy like Phil Collins who hasn't had a hit song in at least 10 years can be worth $280 million and Rihanna could be broke tells you exactly how the music business works. Owning the copyrights to your songs is essential. Phil can sit back and just cash all the royalty checks for his old songs. Performers like Britney or Rihanna who are basically just singing other people's songs get almost no royalties.

Posted by: Cleveland Brown | August 19, 2008 1:19 PM | Report abuse

Poor Gary Glitter. He gets released from a Vietnam prison and no one even cares enough to snark him.

Posted by: M Street | August 19, 2008 1:22 PM | Report abuse

I think part of the problem with AJ (at least for me) is the inconsistency.

Charity.
It’s so true that most celebs get a pass on the charity issue, but it’s because they don’t make an issue of their causes and philanthropy to start with. Once you’ve opened that door, it’s almost as if you can never really do enough unless you’re Mother Theresa.

Appearance.
I’m also conflicted about AJ’s looks. I wouldn’t really say I’m jealous of her looks. I’m not eager to look like her and there are other female celebs who represent my ideal of beauty more than AJ (Charlize Theron, Salma Hayek, etc.). There are times when I see AJ in pix and I think her face and figure do look absolutely stunning, but there are other times when she looks absolutely freaky scary.

Relationships.
Well, she was *very* close to her brother and mother and estranged from her father. You never hear about any other friendships. Her track record with men is pretty well-documented and not anything to aspire to, Brad Pitt notwithstanding. It’s all pretty sad, actually. Kind of like the children—she’s choosing quantity over quality of relationships?

Acting.
Agreed that she showed her talent with Girl Interrupted at the outset of her career and possibly with A Mighty Heart recently. But I think her other choices of roles and her performances in them have otherwise been pretty pedestrian.

I don’t hate AJ, I just think she’s really kind of a mess and she tends to make a very public display of her inner turmoil. It’s kind of like Britney in a more elevated, contained sense to me. And I’ve really given way too much time and thought to this. . .


Posted by: alex stepped away while all heck broke loose | August 19, 2008 1:22 PM | Report abuse

Can we talk about Phil's $46.7 MILLION divorce settlement? Does he really have this kind of money? Can he afford to marry, procreate, and divorce again? These are burning questions that need answers people.

Posted by: jes | August 19, 2008 12:33 PM

Disney Soundtracks anyone? He also toured recently...

Posted by: WDC 21113 | August 19, 2008 1:24 PM | Report abuse

amelia,
maybe being in love had something to do with it. it does make you do craaaaazy things.

Posted by: b | August 19, 2008 1:25 PM | Report abuse

I'd just once like to meet/see/read about someone with "Rose" in their name who doesn't act like a jackass.

and janet stole my anne hathaway comment!
****
sorry, b, couldn't help it. the anne hathaway was a home run. even my dog frankie noticed the silliness.
as to someone named rose who doesn't act like a jackass, i nominate my cousin rose who lives in omaha, nebraska. she has never acted like a jackass, altho' she recently made us bray like donkeys during the best man's (endless) toast at our cousin's wedding.

Posted by: janet loves her cousin rose | August 19, 2008 1:25 PM | Report abuse

"Sorry to burst your buble."

Uh oh--Anon at 11:46 burst Michael Buble?

Posted by: alex | August 19, 2008 1:28 PM | Report abuse

got some sort of message about an hour or so ago when I tried to post a comment. I guess I posted more than my quota today. I don't think that's quite fair. What's up with that?
****
i do not know. i had some comments not show up last week. couldn't figure it out as they were benign. but perhaps i, too, am a pretentious bore. hahahahahahahaha. at least i'm in good company.

Posted by: janet believes that those who call others names should sign their posts and not act like weenies | August 19, 2008 1:32 PM | Report abuse

I wonder if there's a job market out there for advising celebrity ex-wives on how to save their settlements and not blow the whole shebang on shoes...and, er, um, "shoes".

Posted by: CentrevilleMom | August 19, 2008 2:05 PM | Report abuse

Hey, anonymous, I think that's everyone now on the blog that you've lambasted. Why don't you shut the f*ck up for the afternoon? Go kick a puppy or something and get it out of your system. I'm sure you'll be your usual bright and smiling self again tomorrow.

Posted by: wtf | August 19, 2008 2:04 PM

Posted by: Anonymous | August 19, 2008 2:29 PM | Report abuse

Poor Gary Glitter. He gets released from a Vietnam prison and no one even cares enough to snark him.

'Cause its not as bad as a Turkish prison!

Posted by: Gary Snark | August 19, 2008 2:34 PM | Report abuse

A pretentious bore? Me? Moi??? That's unpossible.

Posted by: methinks | August 19, 2008 2:45 PM | Report abuse

Oh boy snark, that's where I'm a viking!

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 2:51 PM | Report abuse

Oh boy snark, that's where I'm a viking!

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 2:51 PM

----------------------------------------------
As long as you do not start singing about being a lumberjack, I'm okay.

Posted by: Sasquatch | August 19, 2008 3:36 PM | Report abuse

I make no promises...

Posted by: Dorkus | August 19, 2008 3:53 PM | Report abuse

Did no one else check Liz's Ian Ziering link?

"He's going to star in a new National Lampoon's "sword-and-sandals spoof" called The Legend of Awesomest Maximus. But wait -- there's more. He'll play "Testiclees, a hero who can only be wounded in his gonads."

Posted by: Nosy Parker says "ouch" | August 19, 2008 4:25 PM | Report abuse

"Sasquatch waxes insouciant."

Oh great, something else we're supposed to wax?

****

Nosy--I saw the link about Ian Ziering. I figured he was playing a relative of Dorkus and Groovis but wasn't going to mention it unless they did!

Posted by: alex | August 19, 2008 4:45 PM | Report abuse

No need to be so shy, Alex!

Posted by: Nosy Parker | August 19, 2008 5:02 PM | Report abuse

alex, Awesomest Maximus is one of those distant cousins from Arkansas we try not to mention too much.

Posted by: Dorkus who sadly has relatives from Arkansas... | August 19, 2008 5:02 PM | Report abuse

Look on the bright side, Dorkus. His first name could have been Alsumest.

Posted by: Nosy Parker is waiting for luvlinsey to show up | August 19, 2008 5:06 PM | Report abuse

Na-na-na-na-na -- hey! You're out of jail!

Posted by: td shouts out to gary glitter | August 19, 2008 5:07 PM | Report abuse

Nosy very true. By the way we a re currently being inundated by a storm system that dwarfs TS Fay. I wonder how much longer I'll have power.

Posted by: Dorkus who says everyone can stop praying for rain now | August 19, 2008 5:10 PM | Report abuse

Oh, sad, sad day. I thought America had purged most of it's collective AJ hatred. Look, it is totally possible to come up with something nasty to say about anyone: Angelina is too skinny, she has too many kids, "Tomb Raider" is a lousy movie...whatever. But if you put the good that she's done against her cultural sins ("stealing" someone's man, promoting violent movies, being more attractive than should be physically possible) I think she has a final balance of "earns her keep" rather than "drains society." Complaining that she isn't sensitive to the potentially genetic conflicts between different Asian nations and is thus dooming her children to a lifetime of angst and strife...c'mon, I know this is Celebritology, but let's keep a LITTLE perspective.

Posted by: Omaha | August 19, 2008 5:45 PM | Report abuse

I always thought Angelina was weird pre-Pitt/Anniston break-up and kind of a homewrecker after that (although I am sure Mr. Pitt is equally to blame for the break-up of his marriage). However, I don't really understand getting fired up just because they adopt underprivileged kids from other countries -- those horrible jerks!! Clearly, they have the financial means to take care of the kids and hearing that she lets her kids eat Cheetos every now and then, as long as it is not a regular staple of their diets, is actually one of the most normal sounding things I have ever heard about AJ. Perhaps their attempts at charitable causes are misplaced, but personally, if they are doing something good, I don't particularly care. They may be weird parents with messed up goals, but under that standard, most people in Hollywood should probably be banished from having children forever. As for whether they adopt and do other things simply to get attention, I don't really know the answer to that, but I'm pretty sure the paparazzi would follow their every move one way or the other. So I can't really call them attention hogs, at least until they start showing up at gas stations and Starbucks 10x a day. Unlike, say, Katherine Heigl, I'm not sure that they go around reminding everyone of how great they are all the time, but I don't really know since I'm not a big fan and don't follow every news story about their births and adoptions, etc.

Posted by: g | August 19, 2008 5:52 PM | Report abuse

Kanye is an idiot. That said, what is so inherently bad about mentioning a person's race? I mean, as long as one doesn't say "Susie Q. is my favorite white person, because she isn't a rythmless, humorless, honky with no butt like all those other white people"...what is the big deal? What is intrinsically offensive about mentioning that a person is black or latina or asian? I think our culture (myself included) has a lot of angst about race, and we've come to the point where it feels as though ANY mention of race verges on a slur.

Kanye is my favorite idiot.

Posted by: Omaha | August 19, 2008 5:53 PM | Report abuse

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