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Posted at 7:35 AM ET, 08/18/2008

Morning Mix: Ellen and Portia Marry; Madonna Celebrates 50th Birthday

By Liz Kelly
Monday

Headlines: Ellen DeGeneres and Portia de Rossi marry... Thousands turn out to remember Bernie Mac at Chicago memorial service... Blinged-out Madonna celebrates 50th birthday... "Harry Potter's" Daniel Radcliffe talks about brain disorder... America Ferrera takes home top honors at ALMA Awards... Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell give their "Imaginarium" earnings to Heath Ledger's daughter... What is going on with Tori Spelling's chest?... Avril Lavigne "too sexy" for some Malaysians... Sylvester Stallone wants us to drink Russian vodka.

Crime Watch: "The Office's" Craig Robinson charged with drug possession (and, no, it wasn't Pineapple Express in his glove box).

Rumor Mill: Michael Jackson hasn't spoken to his brothers in three years.

Say What?
"...it's about time that somebody stands up for that girl and I think she's great." -- John Mayer, who apparently doesn't read the Celebritology comment threads, on recent ex Jennifer Aniston.

---

It's back! Start reading now so you'll be caught up and ready to drop some serious Narnian knowledge on Friday, Sept. 5, when we discuss the first selection in the resurrected "Lost" Book Club: C.S. Lewis's "Prince Caspian."

By Liz Kelly  | August 18, 2008; 7:35 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Friday List: Celebrity Wedding Officiants
Next: Comment Box: Should We Be Talking About Ali Lohan's "Shoe" Size?

Comments

I've checked with the Lovely Mrs. byoolin and we're in agreement that Ellen and Portia's marriage has not undermined ours in any way. Take that, homophobes.

That's a nice thing that Johnny, Jude and Colin have done.

Tori's breasts: Finally, something we can describe as being "as convincing as her acting."

Older brothers can be mean - MJ probably isn't speaking to the others because they always like to play that 'got your nose!' game with him.

Betcha it was that Ryan kid who got Darryl hooked on drugs.


I'm on vacation for the rest of the week, Lizards, Celebritologists and snarkers. I'll send you postcards if I can.

Posted by: byoolin ankles it out of here and leaves the cats in charge. | August 18, 2008 8:29 AM | Report abuse

Apparently Tori went to Tara Reid's plastic surgeon. Yuck.

Posted by: surlychick | August 18, 2008 8:30 AM | Report abuse

It's probably a good thing that John Mayer doesn't read the Celebritology comment threads.

He's hate us for what we snark about him.

Bring us back some saltwater taffy, Byoolin, and wipe that silly smile off your face!

Posted by: Curmudgeon | August 18, 2008 8:34 AM | Report abuse

Whoa! Tori, get thee to a doctor, pronto! That is just not right.

Johnny, Jude and Colin - a very impressive display of actual humanity. I am impressed. (and happy that the little girl doesn't have to depend entirely on the late Mr. Ledger's nutty reletive downunder...)

congrats to Ellen and Portia!

Sylvester Stallone wants us to drink Russian vodka.
Um, OK, no problem.

Posted by: sunnydaze is jelus of byoolin | August 18, 2008 9:03 AM | Report abuse

yeah, that should be nutty *relatives*

heading to the coffee machine...

Posted by: sunnydaze needs spell check | August 18, 2008 9:04 AM | Report abuse

Johnny Depp, Jude Law, and Colin Farrell are classy men. Bravo. No snark need apply.

Enjoy your vacation, byoolin.

Posted by: Sappho | August 18, 2008 9:11 AM | Report abuse

The slogan for Stallone's Russian vodka should be : I must break you.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 18, 2008 9:12 AM | Report abuse

The Avril Lavigne album cited in the article is "Let Go." This is not to be confused with the Cars' song. In my defense, I was working at an independent record store when that came out.

Tori Spelling's booby gap has been like that since 90210. We used to point and laugh.

Posted by: Mz Fitz is ashamed that she knows these things. | August 18, 2008 9:21 AM | Report abuse

Ugh. The picture of John Mayer at the link is super creepy. Blech.

Posted by: Sully | August 18, 2008 9:21 AM | Report abuse

Hooray for Johnny, Jude, and Collin -- classy, very classy.

Ouch! What ever's going on with Tori's chest looks PAINFUL!

Posted by: Anonymous | August 18, 2008 9:22 AM | Report abuse

John Mayer -- are you kidding?!?!?! Me thinks you protest a bit too much.

Posted by: Anonymous | August 18, 2008 9:24 AM | Report abuse

Ok, all together now "photoshop"! Tori is photographed enough that if she had that hole in her chest we'd have seen it already.

Not sure referring to the older ex as "that girl" is a compliment. Plus, I think Ms. Aniston can stand on her own two feet quite well. He's the one that needs defending when you read the posts. There's just something about him....

Posted by: Anonymous | August 18, 2008 9:28 AM | Report abuse

I'm A-OK on Sly's suggestion to drink vodka. And I think I really need one after looking at Tori's chestular region.

Posted by: jaybbub | August 18, 2008 9:32 AM | Report abuse

OK, Sly gets a sponsor for his drinking.

When will Amy Whinehouse get a sponsor for her crack use?

Posted by: Elias Howe | August 18, 2008 9:34 AM | Report abuse

Pretty sure Tori's cleavage has been wide and deep for some time. Necklines ladies, look into them.

Posted by: yellojkt | August 18, 2008 9:46 AM | Report abuse

Avril? Sexy? Bwuh?

Does anyone else think Mizz Spelling might be hosting an alien in there?

Posted by: EricS | August 18, 2008 9:47 AM | Report abuse

Whoa! I've never actually been able to see someone's cosmetic surgery scar before. And that hole is disturbing.

On a happier note, congratulations to Ellen and Portia. I hope they can make it last.

Posted by: Bawlmer | August 18, 2008 9:50 AM | Report abuse

Well if Sly says it, so shall it be. I'll have mine chilled with cranberry juice and a squeeze of lime thank you very much.

Posted by: jake e. poo doesn't think its too early | August 18, 2008 9:51 AM | Report abuse

So, I went to imdb and looked through some of Tori's photos and sure enough, that hole in her chest is there. It's maybe not quite as pronounced as in the recent photos, but still, it's there. It really looks like her shoe job is lopsided. I wonder if her pregnancies could have made it worse? I know my pregnancy changed the way my, um, shoes look.

Posted by: sunnydaze | August 18, 2008 9:53 AM | Report abuse

Tori has always been rather pigeon-toed in the chestular area and was the homeliest of the 90210 girls (hence the virginity pin). Who'd her mom have to sleep with to get her that gig, anyways?

Posted by: yellojkt | August 18, 2008 10:01 AM | Report abuse

HOLLYWOOD - Johnny Depp, Jude Law and Colin Farrell have donated their fee for completing Heath Ledger's final film role to the late star's daughter

This is great, but you know she does have a mom who works too, so I think she would be in good hands even without Heath's money!

Still, I think it was a very kind thing to do.

Posted by: Irishgirl | August 18, 2008 10:01 AM | Report abuse

jake.e, if you've got cranberry and lime juice in there, it's suitable for breakfast as far as I'm concerned.

Also, it looks like Madonna is wearing a necklace for every year that she's been alive.

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | August 18, 2008 10:04 AM | Report abuse

The Malaysians need to get out more if they think Avril Lavigne is too sexy.

Mayer, if she is so wonderful, why were you stepping out on her so much? Oh silly me, you step out on EVERYONE.

Have a good vaction, Byoolin. Bring me back something nice.

Posted by: ep | August 18, 2008 10:05 AM | Report abuse

Idle curiosity makes me wonder what John Mayer will do when he runs out of female celebrities willing to fall for his schtick.

Huzzah for Ellen and Portia! I raise my Sly Stallone recommended vodka in a toast to their happiness.

(And I never thought I'd be typing any sentence that had "Sly Stallone" and "recommended" in it. :O )

Quickly fill out some postcards now, byoolin, so they have a chance of getting to us before your triumphant return. :)

Posted by: CentrevilleMom | August 18, 2008 10:17 AM | Report abuse

yellojkt-You're kidding right? Her father invented the damn show.

I kind of feel sorry for her and those boobs. I believe its called capsular contraction. Maybe getting implants prior to having children and at such a young age isn't such a good idea.

Posted by: jelo | August 18, 2008 10:22 AM | Report abuse

I see Tori has Paula Abdul syndrome. But if you have such an odd shape there, why not, um, cover it up? Haven't these women heard of t-shirts?

Why is Michael the one who owes his brothers royalties on the J5 hits? Did he buy the rights or something? Those songs came out when he was a little kid; surely someone else owned the rights originally. Their father, maybe?

[CUE: "Oh, baby give me one more chance."]

If Sly needs help drinking that vodka, he can call me.

Posted by: td is also jelus of byoolin | August 18, 2008 10:23 AM | Report abuse

Daniel R.: I can definitely relate- though my dyspraxia usually doesn't manifest itself until the fourth drink.

Johnny, Jude & Colin: Congrats on taking the gentlemanly thing. And for everyone else, a lesson: Keep that will up to date.

John M.: As usual, you talked more about yourself than "that girl". (By the way, when did you hook up with Ann Marie?)

Tori: GAAAK!

Posted by: ADHD | August 18, 2008 10:26 AM | Report abuse

Happy vacationing byoolin. The average IQ of WV will be temporarily depressed until you get back.

Posted by: yellojkt | August 18, 2008 10:27 AM | Report abuse

*doing* the gentlemanly thing...

sigh...

Posted by: ADHD is not sufficiently caffeinated | August 18, 2008 10:28 AM | Report abuse

Why is Michael the one who owes his brothers royalties on the J5 hits? Did he buy the rights or something? Those songs came out when he was a little kid; surely someone else owned the rights originally. Their father, maybe?

Posted by: td is also jelus of byoolin | August 18, 2008 10:23 AM
------------------------------------------
My understanding is that MJ does, in fact, own the rights to the J5 songs. It's also alleged that that he also owned a record label on which is brothers recorded albums/songs, but MJ never released. The brothers allege that MJ kept them from earning any more money post-Thriller, which is why Marlon supposedly works in a grocery store stocking shelves, Randy works in an auto repair place, and Tito's taking odd gigs with a small jazz band.

Posted by: clw | August 18, 2008 10:55 AM | Report abuse

Jermaine had a bit of a career post Jackson five. Otherwise Tootie could not have gotten free tickets to his concert for being his "Number One Fan." Then been horribly disappointed that he had no clue who she was, it was all a PR stunt.

Posted by: ep, who watched far too much Facts of Life | August 18, 2008 11:04 AM | Report abuse

If Michael Jackson spoke to his brothers, would they recognize him?

Posted by: Sasquatch | August 18, 2008 11:05 AM | Report abuse

What's dat skank Madonna doin' with my bling? That ho needs to ask becuase borrowin' my gold chains. That fool gonna be askin' for pity when I come to get my bling.

Dman, I'm hungry! I sure could go for some balls right now.

Gimme your balls, fool!

Posted by: Mister T | August 18, 2008 11:10 AM | Report abuse

Note to Madonna, no Madge, wearing every necklace you and Lourdes own does not distract us from your scary veiny arms or embiggend cheekbones.

Posted by: jes | August 18, 2008 11:24 AM | Report abuse

Thanks, clw, for the Jackson info. I also had heard something about the Jackson family (minus MJ) doing a reality show in Ireland, but don't know where that went. Anyone know?

It's almost as though Michael's consciously and methodically trying to sabotage his family. How does Janet manage to stay above it all?

And ep, while I don't remember the Tootie/Jermaine episode of "Facts of Life," I do recall Jermaine singing, "Let's Get Serious" during the Jackons Victory Tour concert at RFK.

Posted by: td had seats on the 50-yard-line and had a blast | August 18, 2008 11:27 AM | Report abuse

ADHD - but there's another lesson, too. If Heath Ledger had married girlfriend, then his estate would have gone to wife and child under the law. It was particularly foolish to not have a will when NOT married to mother of child.

I don't remember the will, but I think it was pre-girlfriend/child and so Michelle gets nothing of his estate, while child is in total limbo depending on inheritence laws in Australia for a child that was not the product of a marriage.

I sure hope the Jolie-Pitts have wills since they are not married and their property is spread across many countries which might each have conflicting inheritance laws.

Posted by: Suzette | August 18, 2008 11:34 AM | Report abuse

Re: Jacksons Reality Show

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,1073042,00.html.

This is from 2005, but I could have sworn I read something recently about it

Posted by: to td | August 18, 2008 11:39 AM | Report abuse

According to some articles, MJ did consciously try to sabotage the other family members' careers. He was going to be the only star. Janet got away with it by being sneaky. She was an actress first, so MJ figured she was no threat to him being a singing superstar. Then when she switched to music, she had the good sense to NOT sign to his label but to another one that he had no influence with.

The sisters are the only ones with money anymore. Rebbie's husband is in real estate. LaToya sings in Europe and is signed to a different label than Michael. Janet also still sings and has a different label. All because they had the good sense to not depend on Michael to support them but went out and supported themselves. Hmmmm.

Posted by: ep | August 18, 2008 11:44 AM | Report abuse

The sisters are the only ones with money anymore. Rebbie's husband is in real estate. LaToya sings in Europe and is signed to a different label than Michael. Janet also still sings and has a different label. All because they had the good sense to not depend on Michael to support them but went out and supported themselves. Hmmmm.

--------------------------------------
Sisters are doing it for themselves! Holla!

Posted by: Anonymous | August 18, 2008 12:28 PM | Report abuse

It's also alleged that Jermaine was supposed to be the lead singer of the J5, but Papa Joe went with Michael because he was younger and they figured it would be a bigger hit to have a younger, cuter kid singing the lead vocals for the group. Needless to say, there's quite a bit of history between Jermaine and MJ, which is why he left the group and went solo.

Posted by: clw admits to having too much knowledge of the Jackson family history | August 18, 2008 12:30 PM | Report abuse

According to msnbc, RDJ just dissed the Dark Knight (basically said screw you DC Comics). I know we decided no snark on RDJ but it's one of my (now) favorite movies so...

I liked Iron Man but TDK is different so I wish actors could be more professional about other movies, even if it is competition. Or maybe I'm asking for too much.

Then again, Depp, Law, and Farrell donated their fees to Heath Ledger's daughter. So the good with the bad!

Posted by: dc_snark | August 18, 2008 12:54 PM | Report abuse

OK kids, here's a thought, how do we know
that John Mayer isn't here already & snarking WITH us?!?!

He's pretty net savvy & has a pretty good sense of humour about himself & his stardom so ya nevah know!

It blows the mind doesn't it?

Posted by: Bored @ work | August 18, 2008 1:37 PM | Report abuse

Wow, Madonna is so weighed down by those necklaces that Guy has to hold her up and lead her around by the elbow like an old lady.

Do we think that she has cheek guards like Michael Jackson's nose guard? Do these people go to the plastic surgeon's office and say, "I know I look pretty good now, but I really wanna look freaky good"?

Posted by: Questioner | August 18, 2008 1:42 PM | Report abuse

It's official, Laurence Fishburne is joining (the original) CSI in the wake of William Petersen's departure from the cast.
http://www.variety.com/article/VR1117990710.html?categoryid=14&cs=1

Posted by: Nosy Parker | August 18, 2008 1:56 PM | Report abuse

The Ellen/Portia wedding article doesn't say whether or not they're going to take each other's name.

Then again, "Portia de Rossi DeGeneres" sounds like a stop on the Carnival Cruise "Best of Italy" tour.

What's the protocol here?

Posted by: td needs signorita manners to weigh in | August 18, 2008 2:20 PM | Report abuse

OK kids, here's a thought, how do we know
that John Mayer isn't here already & snarking WITH us?!?!

He's pretty net savvy & has a pretty good sense of humour about himself & his stardom so ya nevah know!

It blows the mind doesn't it?

Posted by: Bored @ work | August 18, 2008 1:37 PM
=====
JEN DOES NOT NEED SHOE ENHANCEments. She is wonderufl and a seriurs acturess with powers beyond your wildest dreames!!! She has her OWN WATER and doesn't have an idiot 14 year old sister to stick pins into!!!
I WOULD LIKE TO SEE A PHOTO OF JEN ON A PONY!!!
luv ya!! JEN 4ever!

Posted by: luvjen | August 18, 2008 12:00 PM

====
I report. You decide.

Posted by: MoCoSnarky | August 18, 2008 2:24 PM | Report abuse

MoCo, I think you've uncovered the secret identity of "luvjen".

I mean, who else would have such first-hand (erp!) experience of Jen's *shoes* to be able to make such a bold statement?

Kudos to you, MoCo. You are today's Sherlock Holmes.

Posted by: Curmudgeon in amazed | August 18, 2008 2:29 PM | Report abuse

Kudos to you, MoCo. You are today's Sherlock Holmes.

Posted by: Curmudgeon in amazed | August 18, 2008 2:29 PM

Not to toot my own thunder or steal MoCo's horn or anything, but I made this connection in a 1:55 post on the Comment Box.

Posted by: ADHD works and slaves over a hot post... | August 18, 2008 2:43 PM | Report abuse

Larry Fishburne on CSI? Now I'll have to start watching TV again!

Posted by: jaybbub | August 18, 2008 2:46 PM | Report abuse

I had to laugh because at the end of that John Mayer (who does protest too much) story, after he goes on and on about how there's no story for the tabloids to report just two people who broke up because they were in different places, UsWeekly promises "Check out the latest issue of Us Weekly for the complete story of what went wrong with their rocky romance, including how Aniston turned him off, his kinky behavior and his obsession with her ex Brad Pitt." !!!
Silly John Mayer, it doesn't matter what you say -- the tabs already have the story written. And for Aniston it will always include Pitt&Jolie.

Posted by: Ame | August 18, 2008 3:04 PM | Report abuse

Re: Jackons reality show, I was mistaken -- it was England. From April:
http://www.nydailynews.com/gossip/2008/04/03/2008-04-03_michael_jackson_and_clan_plan_retreat_to.html

The articles I've seen can't decide whether it's about Tito's children or his famous parents/siblings. No wonder it hasn't been picked up yet.

Posted by: td probably wouldn't watch either way | August 18, 2008 3:23 PM | Report abuse

If I call you Dr Watson, is that ok, ADHD?

Regardless, the deduction was elementary and brilliant: luvjen = John Mayer

Posted by: Curmudgeon scrambles to make-it-up to ADHD | August 18, 2008 3:31 PM | Report abuse

It really is unforgivably irresponsible for Heath Ledger not to have made any arrangements at all for his daughter. It's not as if she was a newborn when he died and he just hadn't had the time to get around to it. He may have claimed to have loved his child, but those are the actions of a supremely selfish person. I'm glad her mother and others are able to see to her future so she doesn't have to rely on those greedy losers who are Ledger's legal heirs. (I know this was harsh, but I feel VERY strongly about adults who don't take responsiblity for children, elderly persons, and animals under their care.)

It really is a classy thing for Depp, Law, and Farrell to do. It *almost* makes me feel bad for some of the things I've said about Law and Farrell in the past.

Posted by: alex | August 18, 2008 3:33 PM | Report abuse

Hasn't the world had enough Jen/Brad/Angelina news for the next 20 years? (I know, shouting into the wind here, but sometimes I tire of just seeing their names, never mind whatever the "story" is.)

And while gossip magazines existed in the 1950s and 1960s, seeing all the Jen/Brad/Angelina stories make me wonder how the Debbie Reynolds/Eddie Fisher/Liz Taylor story would've fared in the online age.

"Debbie Disses Liz: Hands Off My Man"
"Baby Carrie's Private Anguish for Absent Daddy"
"Liz Meets Ex Nicky Hilton -- At a Hyatt!"

Maybe I need more caffeine, but I think the Jen/Brad/Angelina story has gone way beyond the saturation point, and the presence of John Mayer isn't really the point anymore when it comes to tbat tabloid trio.

Unless Jen starts dating Lance Armstrong, of course. Then all bets are off.

Posted by: td | August 18, 2008 3:36 PM | Report abuse

td, LOL! Interestingly, Debbie and Liz evidently get along semi-well nowadays, due at least in part to shared contempt for Eddie .

Posted by: Nosy Parker | August 18, 2008 3:40 PM | Report abuse

Regarding Heath Ledger not making arrangements for his daughter as any ordinary uupstanding parent would do:

Doncha get it? Celebs ain't ordinary: they don't think ordinary thoughts, they don't do ordinary things, they don't have ordinary relationships, their lives aren't configured in an ordinary way.

This is why whackadoodles are a dime a dozen in Celebritology Land and why most of them are shark bait.

Posted by: Curmudgeon IS ordinary (well, sort of) | August 18, 2008 3:56 PM | Report abuse

I meant *snark* bait

Posted by: Curmudgeon is embarassed that her flying fingers got away from her | August 18, 2008 3:58 PM | Report abuse

If I call you Dr Watson, is that ok, ADHD?

Regardless, the deduction was elementary and brilliant: luvjen = John Mayer

Posted by: Curmudgeon scrambles to make-it-up to ADHD | August 18, 2008 3:31 PM

No worries, Mudge. Not fishing for celebrity (heavens, no!), was just sayin'. Anyway, like John (Oscar)Mayer (Wiener), who's probably already has moved on to his new conquest-- whoever s/he is-- I will have forgotten all about it as soon as... as I... it's... sorry, what was your question?

Posted by: ADHD seeks no fame, lives up to his name | August 18, 2008 4:00 PM | Report abuse

Unless Jen starts dating Lance Armstrong, of course. Then all bets are off.

Posted by: td | August 18, 2008 3:36 PM

******************************************

Hmmm....Jennifer is friends with used to date Vince Vaughn so presumably she has hung out with the Wilson brothers Luke and Owen, and she is good friends with Jake Gyllenhaal, all of whom hag out with Lance on a regular basis.... Maybe it's not so far fetched that she will start dating Lance.

I'll have to keep a look out for her around town.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 18, 2008 4:00 PM | Report abuse

I meant *snark* bait

Posted by: Curmudgeon is embarassed that her flying fingers got away from her | August 18, 2008 3:58 PM

Either way works for me.

Posted by: ADHD | August 18, 2008 4:01 PM | Report abuse

Re: name changes in the Degeneres-de Rossi household.

The mousespouse and I kept our own last names--which is what I'd always planned on, even when I was younger and thought I'd marry a man. But I've heard of hyphenating and one taking the other's name. So it's as varied as the hetero world.

Posted by: mouse | August 18, 2008 4:03 PM | Report abuse

I appreciate that, ADHD.

But with the caution flaag showing, don't forget to mention a celebrity when you comment.

For example: "Either way works for me . . . and Angelina"

Or: "Either way works for me . . . when I read about Lance Armstrong"

See?

Posted by: Curmudgeon offers some advice on posting | August 18, 2008 4:11 PM | Report abuse

For those not so inclined, feel free to ignore the following links. Sasquatch, among others, may enjoy them however.

Still offending as many as possible:
http://www.mortsahl.com

Roseanne rips Jolie, Pitt, Voight over politics
http://www.msnbc.msn.com/id/26267206

Posted by: Nosy Parker logs off and ducks for cover | August 18, 2008 4:14 PM | Report abuse

"all of whom hag out with Lance"
Posted by: Dorkus | August 18, 2008 4:00 PM

_____

Not sure if that was intentional or a typo, but it was the funniest thing I have read in a while. Thanks for the late afternoon laugh! Oh and um, Brad Pitt thinks so too...um, yeah.

Posted by: sunnydaze | August 18, 2008 4:35 PM | Report abuse

Jon Voight? aka, Joe Buck? aka, Noah? aka, Jonas in the upcoming season of 24?

Art imitates life. No wonder Angelina hates him.

Posted by: Sasquatch | August 18, 2008 4:39 PM | Report abuse

sunnydaze, we'll just call that a Freudian slip.

Posted by: Dorkus | August 18, 2008 4:44 PM | Report abuse

all of whom hag out with Lance"
Posted by: Dorkus | August 18, 2008 4:00 PM

_____

Not sure if that was intentional or a typo, but it was the funniest thing I have read in a while. Thanks for the late afternoon laugh! Oh and um, Brad Pitt thinks so too...um, yeah.

Posted by: sunnydaze | August 18, 2008 4:35 PM

So you're saying that *all* those guys have dated an Olsen twin?

Posted by: epony | August 18, 2008 4:44 PM | Report abuse

So you're saying that *all* those guys have dated an Olsen twin?

Posted by: epony | August 18, 2008 4:44 PM

**************************

Not to mention Kate Hudson

Posted by: Dorkus | August 18, 2008 4:47 PM | Report abuse

You're right, Mudge. I was remiss. The distraction of a "Sylvester's Own"-vodka-soaked, too-sexy-for-Malaysia Avril dancing under the weight of 50 years worth of bling at Mrs. and Mrs. DeGenerossi's reception, while Johnny, Jude & Colin pitched pennies into the pothole between Tori's shoes and the former would-be Mr. Aniston griped in the corner about getting handed what millions of men would kill for... well, it all triggered an acute dyspraxia attack, and I would have tripped over my untied shoelaces, except that I was completely starkers on the stage of a Peter Shaffer play. To atone, I shall sacrifice a chicken to the celebrigods.

Posted by: ADHD | August 18, 2008 5:00 PM | Report abuse

To: ADHD at 5:00 PM


hahahahahahahahahaha

See that you do.

Posted by: Curmudgeon calls for the class to come to order | August 18, 2008 5:03 PM | Report abuse

Oooh, 'Mudge gets stern and brings out the ruler.

Posted by: alex | August 18, 2008 5:12 PM | Report abuse

Way to go Johnny, Jude and Colin. It may not amount to much, but the gesture is inspired.

The concept of hagging with Lance has given me a fit of giggles. Good on you, Dorkus.

Posted by: hermespal | August 18, 2008 5:15 PM | Report abuse

alex,

I also own my own personal clicker.

just sayin'.

Posted by: Mudge | August 18, 2008 5:18 PM | Report abuse

Re: Degeneres & de Rossi names

I'm in favor of people keeping their own names after marriage even when they're not already established in their careers and/or famous. I think the real issue usually comes down to chidren's names. (People can do what they want, but I think they need to pick one or the other and not try to go the hyphenation route.)

Posted by: alex | August 18, 2008 6:49 PM | Report abuse

Re: Degeneres & de Rossi names

I'm in favor of people keeping their own names after marriage even when they're not already established in their careers and/or famous. I think the real issue usually comes down to chidren's names. (People can do what they want, but I think they need to pick one or the other and not try to go the hyphenation route.)

Posted by: alex | August 18, 2008 6:49 PM | Report abuse

Sorry about the doublepost. I didn't even think I hit "submit" once, much less twice!

BTW, I know she says she didn't come up with it, but I still think few names top mouse and mousespouse! I get a laugh every time I read that.

Posted by: alex | August 18, 2008 6:52 PM | Report abuse

I agree alex, every time I read mousespouse I immediately visualize mousehouse.

Posted by: hermespal | August 18, 2008 7:03 PM | Report abuse

Madonna's state tax liens, Alex Rodriguez's tax liens, Jose Canseco's tax liens and judgments, Dennis Rodman's federal tax liens

webofdeception.com/#madonna

Posted by: Robert Lewis | August 19, 2008 1:43 AM | Report abuse

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