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Posted at 10:42 AM ET, 09/25/2008

Creative Captioning: Rear View Reality

By Liz Kelly

Thanks Fox Reality Channel Really Awards for bringing this guy to our attention. Otherwise we may have been forced to snark on yet another picture of a much celebrated face. But thanks to you, Fox Reality Channel Really Awards, we have seen the light. We don't need a famous face, per se, to unleash our Creative Captioning creativity. Who needs faces at all when there are so many other assets worthy of comment? And maybe it is this stunt, captured here in perpetuity, that will prove to be this jack-- this guy's big break. And I have to admit, Fox Reality Channel Really Awards, that I'm a teensy bit proud that I had to turn to Google to learn that our man, Dominico, is a former "Shot at Love with Tila Tequila" hopeful and current star of MTV's "That's Amore." I guess the undies were a clue.

You know the drill. Hit me with your best faux captions. The winner will be elevated to a place of prominence and lauded as one of the great wits of the week. And keep in mind that although Domenico found it necessary to lead with his behind, perhaps we can help to elevate his bottom line. So, stay classy, kids. Don't work blue.


(Getty Images)

Do your worst. Or your best. Or your best worst...

By Liz Kelly  | September 25, 2008; 10:42 AM ET
Categories:  Creative Captioning  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Morning Mix: PETA Asks TomKat to Keep Suri Fur Free
Next: Morning Mix: Ed McMahon Tries Rap

Comments

When you're rent's over due
And you've no talent, too,
That's Amore!

Posted by: b | September 25, 2008 12:04 PM | Report abuse

Well, there's always "Does this make my ass look big?"

Posted by: byoolin picks the low-hanging fruit. As it were. | September 25, 2008 12:05 PM | Report abuse

When your rent's overdue
And you've no talent, too
That's Amore!

Posted by: b sees the grammar sheriff coming round the bend | September 25, 2008 12:05 PM | Report abuse

Does my butt look big in this?

Posted by: methinks | September 25, 2008 12:05 PM | Report abuse

I have less class than Cloris' boobs!

Posted by: Elias Howe | September 25, 2008 12:05 PM | Report abuse

once again proving that there's such a thing as ESP, eh byoolin?
or is that, byoolin, eh?

Posted by: methinks | September 25, 2008 12:06 PM | Report abuse

"Pizza Italia, may I help you?" "Yeah, I'd like a large with raspberries please."

Posted by: td also believes the placement of *o* in *amore* is particularly unfortunate | September 25, 2008 12:06 PM | Report abuse

Hi, I am the spokesman for the Burned Retina Institute. In order to complete our research on burned retinas, we need some test subjects....

Posted by: Elias Howe | September 25, 2008 12:09 PM | Report abuse

We'd rather see A-LESS-e. A lot LESS, eh?

Posted by: Anonynandon | September 25, 2008 12:10 PM | Report abuse

"Cheeky S.O.B, isn't he?"

"The Italian Rapscallion"

Posted by: td hates that he has to keep looking at this guy's derriere for creative inspiration | September 25, 2008 12:11 PM | Report abuse

That's A-more than I wanted to see-a.

Posted by: Dorkus | September 25, 2008 12:11 PM | Report abuse

Getty Images' share price fell more than 25% on the New York Stock Exchange today, after publication of this photograph reportedly caused temporary episodes of blindness in people who viewed it. A class-action suit is pending.

Posted by: byoolin | September 25, 2008 12:12 PM | Report abuse

Dominico finally gets to model the outfit he's been saving for Clay's coming out party.

Posted by: epony | September 25, 2008 12:14 PM | Report abuse

once again proving that there's such a thing as ESP, eh byoolin?
or is that, byoolin, eh?

Posted by: methinks | September 25, 2008 12:06 PM

****

Just yesterday, The Lovely Mrs. byoolin asked me where you've been lately. That woman freaks me out sometimes.

Posted by: eh, byoolin, eh. | September 25, 2008 12:14 PM | Report abuse

On second thought, let's not order Italian for lunch.

Posted by: epony | September 25, 2008 12:16 PM | Report abuse

Dominico: Whaddaya mean my waxer missed a spot?

Posted by: Dorkus | September 25, 2008 12:16 PM | Report abuse

American Idol groupie Dominico reacts to Clay Aiken's outing.

Posted by: M Street | September 25, 2008 12:19 PM | Report abuse

American Idol groupie Dominico reacts to Clay Aiken's outing.

Posted by: M Street | September 25, 2008 12:19 PM

LOL!!!!!

Posted by: Tee hee | September 25, 2008 12:26 PM | Report abuse

Dominico: Why yes I am wearing McGraw.

Posted by: Dorkus | September 25, 2008 12:26 PM | Report abuse

Hey, there's no brown in the Italian colors!

Posted by: 23112 | September 25, 2008 12:29 PM | Report abuse

Pizza Dominico! The delivery is free, but wearing pants is extra.

Posted by: Bawlmer | September 25, 2008 12:31 PM | Report abuse

Domenico shows off his lates gift from a smitten Clay Aiken.

Posted by: jes | September 25, 2008 12:36 PM | Report abuse

Mangia!

Posted by: debit | September 25, 2008 12:40 PM | Report abuse

Basta!

Posted by: Nosy Parker | September 25, 2008 12:43 PM | Report abuse

Domenico turns the other cheek, and offers to kiss and make up.

Posted by: Sasquatch | September 25, 2008 12:47 PM | Report abuse

"Someone who loves me went to Italy and all I got was this cheesy pair of briefs"

Posted by: maxine | September 25, 2008 12:48 PM | Report abuse

The restaurant patron asked for pasta primavera, but Dominico could only offer spaghetti and meatballs.

Posted by: dw | September 25, 2008 12:48 PM | Report abuse

Domenico displays the latest addition to the Olive Garden's Never Ending menu. Remember, when you're here, you're family.

Posted by: Sasquatch | September 25, 2008 12:51 PM | Report abuse

Domenico gets ready to one-up Ron Jeremy by kissing his own a$$.

Posted by: Sasquatch | September 25, 2008 12:52 PM | Report abuse

Not that kind of Moon!

Posted by: hodie thanks Liz for ruining that song forever now | September 25, 2008 12:54 PM | Report abuse

That's amore -- I need a diet so there's alessa of me.

Posted by: ep | September 25, 2008 12:54 PM | Report abuse

Love, Italian style.

Posted by: Sasquatch | September 25, 2008 12:55 PM | Report abuse

This is why LiLo went lesbo.

Posted by: Yuck | September 25, 2008 1:02 PM | Report abuse

Please no-more!

Posted by: sjcpeach | September 25, 2008 1:05 PM | Report abuse

Tila may still not have found love but she's thanking her lucky stars tonight that she let Dominico get away - far far away.

Posted by: sjcpeach | September 25, 2008 1:06 PM | Report abuse

"Morning Mix: Upon further consideration, PETA lets the whole "Keep Suri Fur Free" thing slide for now, invokes emergency measures to try to get a snowmobile suit on this guy."

Posted by: byoolin can't stop retching. | September 25, 2008 1:08 PM | Report abuse

"You mean this isn't the auditions for the Pussy-Cat Dolls?"

Posted by: Dorkus | September 25, 2008 1:17 PM | Report abuse

from Tomorrow's headlines...Anti-American protests in several Italian cities after pseudo-celeb Dominico sports the Italian flag on his derierre. No amore here.

Posted by: hodie | September 25, 2008 1:19 PM | Report abuse

Upon hearing many requests for a Britany Spears impersonation, Dominico reveals more of himself than the public needs to see during the premiere of "Blindness".

Posted by: unmute | September 25, 2008 1:20 PM | Report abuse

Do I-a make-a you a-horny, baby? Do I-a?? Shagadelico!

Posted by: different liz | September 25, 2008 1:21 PM | Report abuse

Please no-more!

Posted by: sjcpeach | September 25, 2008 1:05 PM

Yes, I'm about to go lesbo myself.

Posted by: Disgusting! | September 25, 2008 1:22 PM | Report abuse

"Today's special is a Sicilian rump roast."

"The Italian Job 2: (Mercifully) Brief Encounter"

"Who ordered the Pasty, er, Pasta Fazoul, hon?"

"Mike Reno wants his headband back."

"Stayin' Alive 2: Tony Manero's back -- and he's hungry!"

"The trouble with seeing a guy in Italian briefs is that 5 or 6 days later you're nauseous again."

Posted by: td | September 25, 2008 1:28 PM | Report abuse

Whoever ordered the hot Italian sausage should probably demand their money back.

Posted by: Dorkus | September 25, 2008 1:33 PM | Report abuse

Dominico demonstrates just how far the concept of the "booty tooch" has spread, while giving us his best, fierce Miley Cyrus face.

Posted by: Magnolia | September 25, 2008 1:33 PM | Report abuse

"In an effort to cut costs on the Flashdance sequel, Domenico (pictured) has been cast as Jennifer Beals' dance double."

"Yo fatty, put the parm(esan) down."

Posted by: td | September 25, 2008 1:33 PM | Report abuse

Dominico show exactly where he wants to be hit with the "adrenaline" spike.

Posted by: epony's homage to past winners | September 25, 2008 1:38 PM | Report abuse

When the cheeks above the thigh,
make you blind in one eye,
That's amore!

Posted by: Right Winger | September 25, 2008 1:43 PM | Report abuse

"Benvenuto to Italy's Top 40. I'm Ryan Seacrest (and yes, I AM everywhere). Entering the chart at the bottom this week is Domenico's bloated remake of Olivia Newton-John's 1980 hit, 'Physical'."

Posted by: td should have stopped after *yo fatty...* | September 25, 2008 1:49 PM | Report abuse

THE WINNER:

"Mike Reno wants his headband back."

Posted by: byoolin | September 25, 2008 1:51 PM | Report abuse

Chris Kattan just hasn't been the same after his wife filed for the separation.

Posted by: M Street | September 25, 2008 1:54 PM | Report abuse

ROFLMAO!!!!!

Posted by: NALL92 | September 25, 2008 1:56 PM | Report abuse

"GIVE ME AN O !!"

Posted by: Pablo | September 25, 2008 1:57 PM | Report abuse

This is clear evidence of the lowering of standards for Italian soccer players.

Posted by: Dorkus | September 25, 2008 1:59 PM | Report abuse

"I make you an offer you can't refuse."

Posted by: Sasquatch | September 25, 2008 2:01 PM | Report abuse

You don't even want to know what they say on the front:
"Is that a salami in your pocket? Or are you just happy to see me."

Posted by: possum | September 25, 2008 2:08 PM | Report abuse

When the "moon" hits your eye, like a big pizza pie...you go blind!

Posted by: CJB | September 25, 2008 2:12 PM | Report abuse

JLo apparently hasn't waxed in months!

Posted by: bflogirl | September 25, 2008 2:25 PM | Report abuse

Where will you be when your diarrhea comes back?

Posted by: Imodium A-D Aficionado | September 25, 2008 2:26 PM | Report abuse

Does this make my butt look big or not big enough?

Lilo gave us leggings, Dominio gives us patriot dingleberry holders.

Posted by: petal channels methinks and byoolin | September 25, 2008 2:35 PM | Report abuse

Oops, that's supposed to be:

Lilo gave us leggings, Dominico gives us the patriotic dingleberry holder.

Posted by: petal | September 25, 2008 2:38 PM | Report abuse

cellulite- don't be rediculous

Posted by: peter DC | September 25, 2008 2:38 PM | Report abuse

No, you can't-a have-a de Mango!

Posted by: grossed out | September 25, 2008 2:42 PM | Report abuse

I'm too sexy for my pants.....

Posted by: hodie | September 25, 2008 2:54 PM | Report abuse

Datsa one-a spiiiiceyyy meat-a-ball!

Posted by: peepmonger | September 25, 2008 2:58 PM | Report abuse

"Oh, snap! Most people lose their shirt when the market crashes!"

Posted by: Curmudgeon gets timely | September 25, 2008 2:59 PM | Report abuse

What made LiLo go geigh.

Posted by: Sasquatch | September 25, 2008 3:06 PM | Report abuse

cellulite? Don't you mean celebulite?

Posted by: Anonymous | September 25, 2008 3:09 PM | Report abuse

Datsa one-a spiiiiceyyy meat-a-ball!

Posted by: peepmonger | September 25, 2008 2:58 PM

My fav so far!

Posted by: hodie | September 25, 2008 3:13 PM | Report abuse

Grazie, hodie!

Posted by: peepmonger | September 25, 2008 3:14 PM | Report abuse

I'm verklempt. What would - could? - a professional caption writer say about this... this... whatever it is.

Posted by: BxNY | September 25, 2008 3:23 PM | Report abuse

MTV reality-TV star Dominico shows off Italian-style steamed buns, mistakenly thinking he's attending a Food Network event.

Posted by: Anonymous | September 25, 2008 3:27 PM | Report abuse

Sadly for Dominico, he didn't get the message that you can't one-up Britney or Lindsey with your skivies still on.

Posted by: EricS | September 25, 2008 3:28 PM | Report abuse

Dominico advertises his new reality series "Gay Dating: Italian-style." Yo, Adrian!

Posted by: peruviana | September 25, 2008 3:32 PM | Report abuse

I'm gonna need some heavy porn & weed to make it with hubby tonight.

Posted by: Blech! | September 25, 2008 3:45 PM | Report abuse

when the moon hits your gag reflex like a greasy pizza pie, That's Amore.

Also: Kids, this is why guidos wax.

Posted by: other liz | September 25, 2008 3:51 PM | Report abuse

Also: Kids, this is why guidos wax.

Posted by: other liz | September 25, 2008 3:51 PM

LOL! There oughtta be a law! What a turn off! Send the photo to Alaska for birth control!

Posted by: Ha | September 25, 2008 3:58 PM | Report abuse

Everyone wanted to know what happened to Vito Spatafore, Sr. but enquiring minds found out what became of Jr.

Posted by: rob | September 25, 2008 4:05 PM | Report abuse

Yikes! This kinda explains that Aryan thing.

Posted by: Anonymous | September 25, 2008 4:07 PM | Report abuse

Is Domenico related to this guy? Or is this guy related to Byoolin?

http://news.aol.com/article/man-charged-with-passing-gas-at-cop/187707

Posted by: Sasquatch | September 25, 2008 4:14 PM | Report abuse

whoever smelt it, dealt it. Sasquatch I think this guy was related to you! That story had me rolling. Thanks for the laugh.

Posted by: hodie | September 25, 2008 4:21 PM | Report abuse

Does the complaint specify whether the, ah, emission in question was a fizz, a fazz, a tear-a**, a rip-s***, a snorter or the one that goes 'WHOOSH'?


Posted by: byoolin sends George Carlin's best in the cop's general direction. | September 25, 2008 4:22 PM | Report abuse

Oopsie. I forgot the fizz-fazz.

Posted by: byoolin is mortified. | September 25, 2008 4:23 PM | Report abuse

I would NEVER lift my leg, fart and fan at a cop.

I'd take the stealthy, SBD route.

Posted by: Sasquatch | September 25, 2008 4:26 PM | Report abuse

While filming a PSA for the "Stop Bullying Now" campaign, reality star Dominico demonstrates the tragic consequences of an "Atomic Wedgie."

Posted by: Nick | September 25, 2008 4:30 PM | Report abuse

Fox Reality Channel faces a class action lawsuit after simultaneous heart attacks felled a majority of the members of the American Italian Anti-Defamation League.

Posted by: oregonchick | September 25, 2008 5:05 PM | Report abuse

After graduating from Zoolander's Modeling Agency, the only job Dominico could get in these hard times was flashing his best Blue Steel while advertising the grand reopening of the early bird buffet at "That's Amore."

Posted by: rachelt | September 25, 2008 5:08 PM | Report abuse

rachelt, too bad Dominico can't turn left, he's not am ambi-turner.

Posted by: Dorkus | September 25, 2008 5:21 PM | Report abuse

This is how we hail a taxi in Palermo.

Posted by: possum | September 25, 2008 5:46 PM | Report abuse

Eh! Va fa'n'cullo! Mi fa impazzire!

Posted by: possum, who remembers what Italian taxi drivers say. | September 25, 2008 5:48 PM | Report abuse

Reality TV contestant Dominico's ad for restaurant chain That's Amore's new concept: an Italian restaurant for dieters who lack willpower.

Posted by: Snarky Squirrel | September 25, 2008 6:37 PM | Report abuse

People generally don't have trouble ambi-turning unless they are from New Jersey. It's a result of the jug-handle effect. Never having to turn left means that little Jersey kids grow up without the ability to turn left.

I believe that Domineco is Italian.

Posted by: MzFitz | September 25, 2008 9:30 PM | Report abuse

At last, Granny Dominica finally has a photo of her precious Dominico that will shut up once and for all those pretentious biddies who are constantly showing off photos of their grandchild the doctor, lawyer, neurophysicist or Himalaya mountain climber.

Posted by: 44west | September 25, 2008 10:18 PM | Report abuse

You say Amore, I say aBore eh.

Posted by: BeachGirl | September 26, 2008 8:22 AM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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