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Posted at 11:00 AM ET, 10/13/2008

Comment Box: Learning to Accept 'The Hills'

By Liz Kelly
Comment Box

Lauren Conrad at last month's Emmy Awards. Moustache? I think not -- looks like a line of dark pigment. Perhaps too much fake bake? (AP)

I just wanted to say that I can't stand any of those people from the Hills or Laguna Beach or whatever it is called. I mean, I really dislike them. I try not to read anything about them, but it's almost impossible. Even though I have never watched the show (other than clips on E!'s "The Soup"), I still know all of this useless info about them. Am I the only one who feels this way? Will they go away any time soon? And don't you think that Lauren girl has a moustache? -- Submitted to last week's Celebritology Live discussion

I feel your pain, dude. Imagine having to wake up every morning required by your job to pay attention to these empty-headed egomaniacs. But, you know -- duty first! I've watched about a total of 15 minutes of "The Hills" in the past two years and even less of its predecessor, "Laguna Beach." I just don't get it. All they do is lay next to pools and babble incoherently and the camera is all soft-focusy and that Spencer guy is a total [Summer's Eve] and the whole thing is just transparently contrived.

But I keep covering the show's stars for two reasons:

1. Although I'm not the show's target demographic (and I'm guessing you aren't either), someone's making the show a hit. EW even included it in its list of TV's new classics, alongside "Murphy Brown" and "The Kids in the Hall" and star Lauren Conrad has 231,069 MySpace friends. So it follows that someone cares when Audrina Patridge talks about how she was picked on in school for palling around with guys or that Heidi and Lauren (who apparently are two different people) are (I think) attempting a reconciliation.

2. One girl's "useless info" is another's guilty pleasure. As a longtime fan of deliciously nutrition-free TV myself, I can't fault anyone for choosing the "Hills" as their drug of choice. It isn't my bag, but "L.A. Ink," "Rock of Love," "The Osbournes," "Paris Hilton's My New BFF," "The Rachel Zoe Project," "Tabitha's Salon Takeover," -- well, all of these have been known to stop me dead in my well-intentioned tracks and suck me into an hours-long reality TV spree.

So, live and let live, I say. Happy channel surfing.

---

Comment of the Week
She must be an F-list celebrity, as in WhoTF is this? -- M Street comments on Save Ginger from Aubrey O'Day

---


Creative Captioning Winners
Last week, I asked you to appropriately caption the picture of singer/model/actress/freak of nature Grace Jones seen at left. Let the record show that you did not disappoint. The best caps are copied below, all submissions are scannable here.

1. Disco Burka -- ssg

2. I vant to suck. -- Bawlmer

3. Grace Jones show blatant disregard for the take one thing off before leaving the house rule. -- petal

4. Are you sure this is a Wi-Fi Hot spot?? I got nuthin'. -- Chase

5. Dave Chappelle walks the red carpet in preparation for his next role: I'm Grace Jones b*&ch! -- Magnolia

By Liz Kelly  | October 13, 2008; 11:00 AM ET
Categories:  Comment Box  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Morning Mix: Star Jones Disses Former 'View' Co-hosts
Next: Morning Mix: Jolie Buys Knives for Seven-Year-Old Maddox

Comments

Someone paid EW to put the Hills on that list. No way is that vapid male fantasy "classic."

Posted by: ep | October 13, 2008 11:33 AM | Report abuse

yep, I'm with ya Liz. I have no idea who this is. Know nothing about the show. I do know however, she spent big bucks on those perfect eyebrows but neglected the stash. Perhaps they ran out of wax.

Posted by: hodie | October 13, 2008 11:39 AM | Report abuse

I am certain that EW made a huge mistake which wasn't caught until it was too late. There is no way that show should be mentioned with "Murphy Brown" or "The Kids in the Hall".

Holy crap, my comment got picked. Sweeeeeetttt!! I really need to preview before posting. Still, my comment was picked. Sweeeeetttt!

Posted by: petal | October 13, 2008 11:44 AM | Report abuse

I have nothing I can contribute here....I feel old and tired, but at least I don't have a femstache.

Posted by: b | October 13, 2008 11:57 AM | Report abuse

Whooo! I was a little afraid my line was too obscure- guess it worked!

I also loved buffetfan's line, "Oh, I wish I had a handlebar eyelash..."

Posted by: Bawlmer | October 13, 2008 12:27 PM | Report abuse

"The Hills" is popular because that show is kind of the truth.

And there's no such thing as a "guilty pleasure." If you feel guilty about enjoying something as simple as a television show, you have issues. Like stuff earnestly, people.

Guilty pleasures and pretensions tend to go together like peas and carrots. Avoid both.

Watch "The Hills."

Posted by: Jonathan | October 13, 2008 12:42 PM | Report abuse

Watch "The Hills."

Posted by: Jonathan | October 13, 2008 12:42 PM
=====================================

Jonathan,

Are you the person who got (paid) EW to put "The Hills" on their classic list?

There are entirely too many dimwitted TV programs. Why, in my day . . . never mind.

Posted by: Curmudgeon | October 13, 2008 12:51 PM | Report abuse

Moustache? I think not.

Skin discoloration on the upper lip like that can be a side-effect from using birth control pills. I know, because it happened to me.

Posted by: nameless lizard | October 13, 2008 1:07 PM | Report abuse

I'm proud to say that I've never watched "The Hills".

I only have limited basic cable so I don't receive MTV or VH1. It sounds like there's nothing but crap on those channels anyway so I'm not missing anything.

I have heard that LC and other people on these shows make an obscene amount of money. That's another thing that's wrong with America. We waste so much money on junk instead of spending it on important things like education.

Posted by: zebeagle | October 13, 2008 1:11 PM | Report abuse

I'm proud to say that I've never watched "The Hills".

I only have limited basic cable so I don't receive MTV or VH1. It sounds like there's nothing but crap on those channels anyway so I'm not missing anything.

I have heard that LC and other people on these shows make an obscene amount of money. That's another thing that's wrong with America. We waste so much money on junk instead of spending it on important things like education.

Posted by: zebeagle | October 13, 2008 1:11 PM
**************************************

Here's a cookie.

There is no place for smugness on a celebritology blog.

Posted by: Anonymous | October 13, 2008 1:20 PM | Report abuse

Okay, I know this is Celebritology and not some serious blog about the Middle East, but Liz, you work for the esteemed Washington Post! "Lay" by the pool?? A writer (or her editor) should know it's "lie."
As for Lauren's mustache, she sported it a couple of weeks ago in a conversation with Stephanie. The girl should see a waxer immediately.

Posted by: Alex | October 13, 2008 1:28 PM | Report abuse

Maybe now we'll see all the little Lauren wanna-be's sporting black femstaches!
OMG, it also looks as if she has a thin layer of down on her back and shoulders. Wax, girl, wax!

Posted by: Islamorada Girl | October 13, 2008 2:03 PM | Report abuse

i dont see what's wrong with the concept of lauren conrad and a lay by the pool...
*cough*

Posted by: Quintilus Varus | October 13, 2008 2:26 PM | Report abuse

zomg, #4, the one about the wi-fi -- that was your winner right there.

Posted by: other liz | October 13, 2008 2:34 PM | Report abuse

Regardless of the 'stache, yeah, I think whoever that chick is should back away from the fake-bake. She's approaching Christina Aguilera scary-skin territory and her skin looks totally fried and leathery. How old is she? 20 or so?

If she's taking birth control pills, I'm so relieved there is a celeb who IS practicing birth control that I don't care how hairy she is or isn't!

Posted by: Californian | October 13, 2008 3:34 PM | Report abuse

Californian
I'm so relieved there is a celeb who IS practicing birth control

That's GOT to be it, the reason Jamie Lynn and others are avoiding the pill. Better to keep having more babies than be seen with an ugly upper lip.

Posted by: Nosy Parker | October 13, 2008 3:54 PM | Report abuse

Up until the 70's there was a program of systematic sterilization of undesirables, i.e. women of low IQ or poor women. I say this program could work, only instead of basing it on IQ or poverty level, I say if your last name is Lohan or Spears, you're sterilized. On a vapid air head on a reality show? Sterilized. Girlfriend of Hugh Hefner or ex-wife of Charlie Sheen. I think you get where I'm going with this.

Posted by: I don't see why it can't work | October 13, 2008 4:10 PM | Report abuse

I don't see why it can't work: Do we have to wait until they are exes of Charlie Sheen? Can't we sterlize them before they marry? Because he manages to get them pregnant, then divorce them. So the genes go on.

Posted by: ep | October 13, 2008 4:19 PM | Report abuse

Up until the 70's there was a program of systematic sterilization of undesirables, i.e. women of low IQ or poor women. I say this program could work, only instead of basing it on IQ or poverty level, I say if your last name is Lohan or Spears, you're sterilized. On a vapid air head on a reality show? Sterilized. Girlfriend of Hugh Hefner or ex-wife of Charlie Sheen. I think you get where I'm going with this.

Posted by: I don't see why it can't work | October 13, 2008 4:10 PM

****************************************

I'm pretty sure the Supreme Court has ruled this as illegal, I don't have my Con Law book anymore so I'll leave it to ep to find the case.

Posted by: Dorkus who has been lurking today | October 13, 2008 4:21 PM | Report abuse

Giving it more thought, lets just sterilize Charlie Sheen.

Posted by: I don't see why it can't work | October 13, 2008 4:22 PM | Report abuse

I'm pretty sure the Supreme Court has ruled this as illegal, I don't have my Con Law book anymore so I'll leave it to ep to find the case.

Posted by: Dorkus who has been lurking today | October 13, 2008 4:21 PM

\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\\

Damn activist judges

Posted by: Anonymous | October 13, 2008 4:23 PM | Report abuse

When has a little illegality stopped us from doing what is right? I'm sure the Supreme Court will see the greater good in this case. As long as we follow due process, we could probably get away with it. Give me a minute to come up with some protections that will pass constitutioanl muster but still stop the spread of Lohans, Spearsi and Sheens and we will be good to go.

Posted by: ep | October 13, 2008 4:52 PM | Report abuse

...Girlfriend of Hugh Hefner or ex-wife of Charlie Sheen...

**************

Do you mean girlfriend or ex-girlfriend? Because apparently while you're a girlfriend of Hef there's no chance of you getting pregnant, no matter how badly you want it, so sterilization is completely unnecessary.

Posted by: goob noob | October 13, 2008 5:15 PM | Report abuse

Concerning the comments on Grace Jones pixs.

I wuz robbed! (again) Queen Liz must not like me!

Posted by: Elias Howe | October 13, 2008 7:17 PM | Report abuse

Not that it's any consolation to you, Elias, but I loved your "Dan Rather" and "Lone Ranger" captions.

Posted by: Sasquatch | October 13, 2008 7:26 PM | Report abuse

apparently while you're a girlfriend of Hef there's no chance of you getting pregnant

Barbie Benton did, didn't she?

Posted by: Anonymous | October 13, 2008 8:21 PM | Report abuse

Barbie Benton did, didn't she?

Posted by: Anonymous | October 13, 2008 8:21 PM

***

Sez Wikipedia: "She left Hefner when she eventually realized that he was not interested in starting a new family." It goes on to say that she did later have two kids with a real estate developer she married in '79.

Posted by: byoolin | October 14, 2008 8:07 AM | Report abuse

Maybe you were thinking of Kimberly Conrad. She had two of his kids in '90 & '91.

Posted by: byoolin | October 14, 2008 8:09 AM | Report abuse

Maybe you were thinking of Kimberly Conrad. She had two of his kids in '90 & '91.

*****************

She was also (and still is) his wife.

Posted by: goob noob | October 14, 2008 8:59 AM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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