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Posted at 6:57 AM ET, 12/24/2008

Morning Mix: Jennifer Hudson to Make First Appearance Since Family Tragedy

By Liz Kelly
Wednesday

Headlines: Jennifer Hudson set to perform for first time since family murders... Without Jeremy Piven, "Speed-the-Plow" ticket sales plummet... Gwyneth Paltrow and Stella McCartney welcome Madonna back to London... Britney Spears hires Madonna's tour director... Ben Stiller breaks hand skiing... Lance Armstrong and girlfriend expecting child... DJ AM files suit in September plane crash.

Pix: Mariah Carey, fashion victim.

Rumor Mill: Tina Fey and Alec Baldwin on the outs? Probably not... Sydney residents miffed by Nicole Kidman's yacht moorage... Screaming match with Lindsay Lohan preceded Samantha Ronson's hospital visit.

Say What?
"I would tell them to please return my things, because I know they're probably watching E! News right now..." -- Former jailbird Paris Hilton, who assumes that all felons watch E! 24/7, pleads for the return of $2 million in stolen jewelry.

By Liz Kelly  | December 24, 2008; 6:57 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Celebrity Excess: A Little Piven-spiration
Next: Last Minute Celeb-Inspired Gifting

Comments

Lance and his girlfriend have been dating since July and already a baby on the way? Sheryl Crow, how come you dated Lance for more than two years and didn't make the baby mama grade? Wasn't he strong enough to be your man?

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | December 24, 2008 7:35 AM | Report abuse

I never understood the hatin' on Gwynnie (not that she's one of my favs) until now. Palling around with Madge is reason enough in my book. Stella gets a pass (just a regular pass) from me, because she's already got enough problems.

Paris Hilton may be closer to the truth on the viewing habits of felons than you might think. I'll bet they're not watching CNN. I'm sure they flip over to "America's Most Wanted" when it's on.

Posted by: reddragon1 | December 24, 2008 8:13 AM | Report abuse

And Tina-Alec, wtf? Sarah Palin IS hot. Not the best political thinker of our time, but hot.

Posted by: reddragon1 | December 24, 2008 8:16 AM | Report abuse

Did they run out of combs & brushes in London?

Posted by: jezebel3 | December 24, 2008 8:24 AM | Report abuse

How many Muppets did Christian Dior have to kill to make Mariah's boots?


I've been away, so I apologize if this has been done already: People just won't want to see "Speed-the-plow" without its mercurial star.


Let's all shed a tear, shall we, for those poor Sydneyites on Pier 6/7, who are suffering the indignity of the Christmas presence of their erstwhile neighbour's yacht blocking the views from their multi-million-dollar berths. Maybe Nicole could get Keith and some of his friends to do a benefit record (à la "Do They Know It's Christmas") to help them out?


Ho, ho, ho, y'all.

Posted by: byoolin1 | December 24, 2008 8:53 AM | Report abuse

Isn't Mariah Carey fashion victim a tad redundant?


Gwyn, Stella, please feel free to keep Madge. Think of it as a Christmas present from the entire USA.


Yes Lance we get it. You apparently are the greatest man in the world. Not only can you set impossible records on the bike, but it seems you only need one testicle to do what most men need two for. We humbly bow down to your greatness.


The Tina Fey/Alec Baldwin thing seems more jovial than anything else. Their exchange sounded more like something two people who are very comfortable around each other would say.

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 24, 2008 9:01 AM | Report abuse

I find the whole Lance thing interesting considering he is sterile. He other three kids are products of artificial insemination. He had his fish frozen before treatment, and now he has another kid on the way....

Posted by: xenocyclus1 | December 24, 2008 9:17 AM | Report abuse

Lance, no way that baby is yours. Sorry, not believing it. Chemo and tight pants for years, not getting the job done.

Good move Brit because we all know how successful Madonna's tour was.

Merry Christmas or whatever holiday you celebrate, ya'all.

Posted by: epjd | December 24, 2008 9:21 AM | Report abuse

There is no way Lance is fathering a kid without a trip to the freezer. Since it's his girlfriend and not a wife, presumably there were not any courthouses between them and the fertility clinic.

Posted by: yellojkt | December 24, 2008 9:34 AM | Report abuse

Wow, wonder what did Nicole do to p.o. her former neighbors? She got rid of Tom a long time ago, cut her some slack.

Anyone get the sense that Madonna is grooming Britney to be the heir to her perennial superstardom? First the kiss, then Britney appears at Madge's concert, then Britney appears wearing the same costume Madonna has worn on her Sticky/Sweet tour, and now she has Madonna's tour director. Soon will we hear that Madonna has decided to adopt Britney's sons? Mmmmm....

Ben Still breaks hand skiing seemingly distracted by what he believed to be blood red Yeti on the slopes of Aspen.

Yeah, the thieves probably do watch E!. Police suspect an inside job, the door was unlocked and video shows the thieves knew just where to go. Mmmm. Wonder how much it was insured for.... Mmmm....

Posted by: hodie | December 24, 2008 9:43 AM | Report abuse

Okay, so I looked this up on the Wikipedia (which is never wrong), apparently testicular cancer doesn't leave you completely sterile, although it can greatly reduce one's sterility.

I'm sorry, but I don't buy the into the baby-daddy Flavor-Ice theory. I don't care how much you care for each other, I doubt any girl who has only been dating a guy for 6 months would agree to that sort of procedure. Most likely Lance probably considered himself to be infertile and took no precautions because of said thinking.

Maybe Dr. hodie, Medicine Woman can shed some light on this situation.

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 24, 2008 9:43 AM | Report abuse

Update on Paris burglary. No panties were stolen from the Starlet Commando's residence for obvious reasons.

Posted by: reddragon1 | December 24, 2008 9:51 AM | Report abuse

Maybe Dr. hodie, Medicine Woman can shed some light on this situation.

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 24, 2008 9:43 AM

If he still has one of his jewels, it can happen.

Posted by: hodie | December 24, 2008 9:59 AM | Report abuse

I used to admire Lance Armstrong but that was many girlfriends and a wife ago. I'm glad he beat cancer and bravo for raising a ton of money for research but man, he's a mess.

Posted by: pras40 | December 24, 2008 10:03 AM | Report abuse

Welcome back, byoolin.

"Without Jeremy Piven, 'Speed-the-Plow' ticket sales plummet" -- True. But with Jeremy, the audience probably leaves at intermission and heads to a late-night root canal in hopes of more enjoyment.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | December 24, 2008 10:05 AM | Report abuse

hodie
blood red Yeti on the slopes of Aspen

Uh, did our resident cryptid get some manscaping done?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 24, 2008 10:15 AM | Report abuse

hodie
blood red Yeti on the slopes of Aspen

Uh, did our resident cryptid get some manscaping done?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 24, 2008 10:15 AM

Could be but I was actually referring to Mariah Carey.

Posted by: hodie | December 24, 2008 10:17 AM | Report abuse

"Maybe Nicole could get Keith and some of his friends to do a benefit record (à la "Do They Know It's Christmas') to help them out?" --byoolin1

KEITH: It's Christmas time
There's no need to diss her yacht
At Christmas time
Her hair's too blond, people say she's hot

NICOLE: And in this town of Sydney
I can botox up my brow
So my forehead's frozen tight
No wrinkles now!

(Cue: drums. . . .)


Posted by: td_in_baltimore | December 24, 2008 10:18 AM | Report abuse

Those boots are made for snarkin'
So that's just what we'll do
One of these days those boots
Are gonna step in some doo-doo.

Yes, those Bogner stretch pants do make your butt look big, Mariah. And the jacket makes you look like Mrs Bibendum. No Michelin stars for that outfit!

The Aspen Fashion Police require skiers and boaders to have a net worth in the low 8-figure range to dress for the slopes as badly as Mariah Carey.

I'm about 5 figures short on net worth.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 24, 2008 12:13 PM | Report abuse

According to at least one source, Lance Armstrong and Anna Hansen conceived the old fashioned way:

http://www.postchronicle.com/news/entertainment/tittletattle/article_212195382.shtml

So I guess that means that it's not inconceivable [cue Princess Bride puns].

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 24, 2008 12:23 PM | Report abuse

I do not think that word means what you think it means.

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 24, 2008 12:31 PM | Report abuse

Gee, Lance's girlfriend is a thin blond. Who woulda guessed?

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 24, 2008 12:33 PM | Report abuse

http://www.80stees.com/prodImageDisplay.asp?prodid=PRBD021&image=PRBD021_SM2.jpg&lgimage=PRBD021_LG2.jpg&gender=Mens

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 24, 2008 12:47 PM | Report abuse

As for the Sam Ronson "fight w/Lindsey subsequent hospital stay from exhaustion" story, I'm w/one of the posters that noted, "the moral of the story is not to let the cocaine run out"


Posted by: plamar1031 | December 24, 2008 12:51 PM | Report abuse

What stupid idiot would let Lance Armstrong embiggen them? I'm not speaking of his lovely ex-wife, who is lucky to be rid of him. Depite the fact that he is a commitment phobe and control freak who dates women who look like his mother, he also supposedly has radioactive sperm from chemo. Also the article in US is wrong. His son Luke is older than the twins. I am very sorry to say that I once read that jerk's autobiography and believed it.
On that happy note, Merry Christmas to all my lizard friends! The New Year will bring Lance, Madonna and A-Rod in a sperm bank love sandwich. Cheers!!

Posted by: possum_pouch | December 24, 2008 12:56 PM | Report abuse

KEITH: It's Christmas time
There's no need to diss her yacht
At Christmas time
Her hair's too blond, people say she's hot

NICOLE: And in this town of Sydney
I can botox up my brow
So my forehead's frozen tight
No wrinkles now!

(Cue: drums. . . .)

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | December 24, 2008 10:18 AM
=====
Chorus:

Feed Ni-cole!
Have a piece of pumpkin pie...

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 24, 2008 1:02 PM | Report abuse

he New Year will bring Lance, Madonna and A-Rod in a sperm bank love sandwich. Cheers!!

Posted by: possum_pouch | December 24, 2008 12:56 PM

*******************************************

Did we really need that at lunch time?

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 24, 2008 1:03 PM | Report abuse

Oh, we're way beyond lunch down at Possum Island. We've been into the rum for some time.

Posted by: possum_pouch | December 24, 2008 2:43 PM | Report abuse

Holiday treat!
"Ahead of Her Class
No Oscar Yet, but Kate Winslet's Career Is the One to Watch":
http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2008/12/23/AR2008122302891.html?hpid=features1&hpv=national

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 24, 2008 3:07 PM | Report abuse

Amazing. This blog has been on for almost 9 hours today, and I don't see where anybody has uttered these immortal words.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rpYTOBHMKKg

Posted by: scooter964 | December 24, 2008 4:10 PM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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