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Posted at 8:31 AM ET, 12/30/2008

Morning Mix: Tom Cruise Wants 10 Kids

By Liz Kelly
Tuesday

Headlines: Tom Cruise says he wants 10 children... Madonna was biggest concert draw of 2008... Woody Harrelson marries girlfriend of 20 years... Diddy offers to pay for New Year's cab rides... Jay-Z's proposed hotel project can't get financing... Courtney Love tells PETA to back off... Mia Farrow's daughter dead at 35... Newspaper outs smoking celebrities.

Pix: The Hilton sisters arrive in Australia ahead of New Year's bash... Suri Cruise doing her usual cute thing.

Rumor Mill: Zooey Deschanel engaged to Death Cab for Cutie frontman... Drew Barrymore and Jason Segal sing karaoke ("Rainbow Connection") on date... Mickey Rourke allegedly trashes Sean Penn... Is Tara Reid's rehab stint more of a publicity stunt?... The Jam's Paul Weller and girlfriend caught drunk in public... Heather Mills gets new publicists... Victoria Beckham allegedly annoyed by husband David's new tattoo.

Good Read
From the elf queen Galadriel in the "Lord of the Rings" trilogy to her portrayal of Katharine Hepburn in "The Aviator" to the tour de force impersonation of an androgynous version of Bob Dylan in "I'm Not There," Blanchett has chosen challenging parts and won rafts of awards, including a 2004 Oscar for best supporting actress for "The Aviator." -- A Hollywood Elusive (Vanity Fair, Feb. 2009)

By Liz Kelly  | December 30, 2008; 8:31 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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Next: 2008: The Year in Celebrity

Comments

Change "Tom Cruise" to "Michael Jackson" in that first sentence and it's 2003 all over again.

I wonder if Heather Mills' new publicists know that part of their job description involves applying naked spray-on tans. (Let's hope they follow the instructions at least as well as Paris Hilton's publicist Elliot Mintz did: http://www.hollywoodgrind.com/elliot-mintz-is-a-big-oompa-loompa/)


Posted by: byoolin1 | December 30, 2008 8:49 AM | Report abuse

Oh where to start....

They better start thawing out some more L. Ron Hubbarb if Wee Tom wants more kids.


Why do I feel a little frightened by the fact that the two biggest concert draws were Madonna and celinedion?


Says Courtney Love on her blog, "Yep, I'm a fur wh*re."

-Well the fur part is just extraneous.


It sounds like Jay-Z's hotel has a few more than 99 problems.


Salma Hayek is smokin'? I think all the guys knew that. Oh, they're talking about cigarettes...


Is Drew Barrymore a female version of John Mayer? She seems to always be making out with a new guy.

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 30, 2008 8:50 AM | Report abuse

I wonder if Becks and Posh are who Gilbert Gottfried is talking about in the joke he tells about 54 seconds in at this (NSFW, obviously) link:
http://www.xomba.com/video_gilbert_gottfried_at_roast_of_bob_saget

Posted by: byoolin1 | December 30, 2008 8:53 AM | Report abuse

That is very sad about Lark Previn, or as Woody Allen called her, The One That Was Too Old For Me.

What?! I'm not the one marrying my common-law step-daughter.

Posted by: yellojkt | December 30, 2008 9:14 AM | Report abuse

Does wee Tom expect Kat(i)e to snuggle up with the turkey baster 7 more times?

What?! I'm not the one marrying my common-law step-daughter.

Posted by: yellojkt | December 30, 2008 9:14 AM

Kind of brings to mind a certain baby who, you know - died.

Posted by: jes11 | December 30, 2008 9:19 AM | Report abuse

yellojkt, for SMAME! Yet still I laughed.

Madonna is the biggest concert draw? Who is her audience, 50ish women with big veins and alimony payments?

Mickey Rourke looks like a drag queen in that photo. With Lisa Rinna's lips.

Paul Weller! Man, I am a big fan of The Style Council fan, and now I'm bummed. (Mostly because he looks so old and he's five years older than I.)

I think we need a moratorium on Suri news until she's at least in kindergarten. That and the Katie jeans obsession. Tom, however, is fair game. 10 kids? It's a little late to be modeling your life on the Duggars. What an annoying doof.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | December 30, 2008 9:29 AM | Report abuse

I haven't had a chance to read the article, but why is Diddy so desperate to do something for New York City? Paint the ball, pay for cabs... what's next? Re-record the arrival messages for the subway system? If he'd like to do something useful, maybe he could donate funds towards the schools or re-pave a road or buy the Brooklyn Bridge. :|

Posted by: CentrevilleMom | December 30, 2008 9:39 AM | Report abuse

How much did Tom pay for that story? It reads like he wrote it himself.

I can't believe more people paid to see celinedion than Tina Turner. Smame!

Posted by: memphis1 | December 30, 2008 9:46 AM | Report abuse

Obviously, ten children are required to complete the Thetan circle and unlock the secrets of Xenu.

Posted by: MStreet1 | December 30, 2008 9:48 AM | Report abuse

What is that sore on Katie Holmes' mouth? Yikes! What about Tom's OTHER kids? Are they chopped liver?

Posted by: jezebel3 | December 30, 2008 9:51 AM | Report abuse

When I saw the headline (so to speak) "The Hilton Sisters Down Under" I thought I had stumbled onto a porn site. Now I must call Qantas and cancel my New Years' reservations.

Drew is just following an old family tradition.

Madge biggest concert draw. Don't get that. Think she'd come across better on CD. You don't have to look at her.

Saw the trailer to the new Mickey Rourke flick. He used to be skeevy. Now he is OLD and skeevy. Kinda like Woody Allen, without the documentation.

One more thing Cate Blanchett has going for her. She's not Gwynnie.

Posted by: reddragon1 | December 30, 2008 9:54 AM | Report abuse

Tom has three already. If he could push Brad out of the picture, he could lay claim to AJ's six. Then he just needs one more. I love it when a plan comes together.

Posted by: yellojkt | December 30, 2008 10:11 AM | Report abuse

Whoa! From those photos of Katie, she is obviously not keeping up. Poor girl, what is she gonna look like after 10? Quick call Angie and Brad and get the number of their adoption agent. By the way, I hear Heather Mills old nanny is available.

Woody, are you sure those oats are sown? Geez, 20yrs?!

If he can't paint the town purple, Diddly Poop (I liked that one yesterday, Sas), will give rides to those who can. Wonder if the Cash Cab is picking up on New Year's . Drunk revelers trying to answer trivia, now that would be a good show.

Posh annoyed about Beck's new tat? What happened, did they burn the wrong Spice skin?

Posted by: hodie | December 30, 2008 10:12 AM | Report abuse

oops, it should say "into his skin"

Posted by: hodie | December 30, 2008 10:15 AM | Report abuse

Condolences to Lark Previn's family (especialy her young children) over the premature death of their loved one, who according to the article went to great lengths to lead a non-celebrity life, and struggle against illness for a decade.


Anyone else also think Wee Tom's enthusiasm for having way too many kids might be yet another sign of bipolar disorder? Oh, wait, there's no such thing among $cientologi$t$ (or else there's a quack non-drug "cure" for it).


Article that might interest some of the other Lizards as well:
"Oops! She Crashed Again. Why celebrities are such bad drivers"
http://www.slate.com/id/2206100

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 30, 2008 10:28 AM | Report abuse

Ack, should read, struggled.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 30, 2008 10:30 AM | Report abuse

Diddly Poop (such an accurate name)wants a captive audience for his cologne and vodka advertising.

Posted by: petalceleb | December 30, 2008 10:48 AM | Report abuse

I know for a fact that it takes a three SUV motorcade for Tom and Suri to drop Katie off at her day job.

http://livebythefoma.blogspot.com/2008/12/cruise-control.html

I got the pictures to prove it.

Posted by: yellojkt | December 30, 2008 10:51 AM | Report abuse

Lessee, first Poo Diddy wants you to drink lotsa his vodka, then he'll help underwrite the cab ride you'll need home as a consequence. Maybe there's another way. Although, as Murphy Brown famously noted, when it comes to drinking, New Year's Eve is amateur night.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 30, 2008 10:57 AM | Report abuse

May I second the motion for a moratorium on Suri Cruise pictures? She's a toddler, for goodness' sake, who is obviously scared of the cameras. Plus, the attention just encourages photographers to continue to STALK her. And stalking it is, to have them lie in wait for her every day...

Posted by: msame | December 30, 2008 11:16 AM | Report abuse

Yellojkt, do I understand this correctly? YOU took those photos of Tom and Katie and Suri exiting their motorcade? I thought we were all amateurs here, but you have graduated to paparazzi! Not bad.

Who are you planning to stalk with your camera today?

Posted by: newengland1 | December 30, 2008 11:23 AM | Report abuse

Lessee, first Poo Diddy wants you to drink lotsa his vodka, then he'll help underwrite the cab ride you'll need home as a consequence.
Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 30, 2008 10:57 AM

Yeah, but will Pee Diddly Doo be there to hold your hair back while you're puking?

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 30, 2008 11:28 AM | Report abuse

Wow. When marrying my sweetie after 20 years of shacking up and having kids, I think Alanis Morisette would be the last person I'd want to sing at my wedding.

It's like rain on your wedding day.

But what it all comes down to, my friend, is that you haven't got it all figured out just yet.

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 30, 2008 12:08 PM | Report abuse

Interesting that all the smokers they "outed" were women. Are women more likely to be closet smokers (they do say the addiction is stronger for us) or is it just still more taboo for women to smoke than men?

Posted by: marybindc | December 30, 2008 12:11 PM | Report abuse

10 kids??? They will still grow up to be taller than you Wee Tom. And all leave your whackjob life as soon as possible.

Condolences to Mia Farrow and her family (including the one she is not talking to).

When I read that Mickey Rourke allegedly trashed Sean Penn, I so hoped it was in the way that rock stars used to treat hotel rooms. Darn.

Posted by: epjd | December 30, 2008 12:29 PM | Report abuse

Look out guys and gals! The Tom Turkey Baster is on the looser! Please, please keep your full-body condom on at all times!!
Why do you think Katie is wearing those ridiculous stirrup tights?
That goes for you too, Wibbly Dibbly Diddy!

Posted by: possum_pouch | December 30, 2008 12:31 PM | Report abuse

I love it when men say "I want 10 kids!" when they're not the ones getting fat, bloated, getting hemorrhoids, high blood pressure, & gestational diabetes & pushing those 10 kids outta THEIR hoohah!>:-<

Not EVERY woman wants to be a baby factory like that Duggar woman, who, if I've calcualted correctly, has been pregnant for 13 1/2 years or so.

Until Katie says so, eff Tom Cruise right up his tiny troll-like arse. Wait, he'd prolly like that, eraseeraseerase, change that to force him to watch Losin' It & Legend over & over until he acknowledges those 2 flicks on his resume.

Posted by: wadejg | December 30, 2008 12:36 PM | Report abuse

Katie Holmes is wearing normal pants and flats. Who knew she owned flats?

Posted by: otherliz | December 30, 2008 12:43 PM | Report abuse

I think Katie wears flats quite a bit.

Are you confusing her w/Posh or Shauna Sands or what?

Posted by: wadejg | December 30, 2008 12:49 PM | Report abuse

Yeah, but will Pee Diddly Doo be there to hold your hair back while you're puking?

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 30, 2008 11:28 AM

Good one mdreader! Coworker had to come in and administer the heimlich when I chocked on my ham sandwhich! (not really but nearly so!)

Posted by: hodie | December 30, 2008 12:59 PM | Report abuse

Hey folks! Happy New Year, and thanks for all the snark!

Lots of good snark today.

Dr. Hodie, you beat me to the Cash Cab snark. I'm wondering if we could combine this with the Death Cab for Cutie story.
Hmm...Crash Cab?

Thanks to Dorkus, Possum and Yellow Jacket for the snark on Courtney Love, the warning about the Tom Terrific Turkey Baster, and the observation that Salma Hayek is smokin'. Jeese, isn't she still nursing? If I were her kid, the first words out of my mouth would be, "Mom, your boobs taste like an ash tray."

How would one be able to ascertain that Victoria Skeleboobs Beckham is annoyed with Beck? How would her expression differ from the norm?

Does anyone want to place a bet as to how long heather Mills new publicists will last?

I concur with redragon on Mickey Rourke. Exactly how would Mickey trash Sean Penn? By impersonating him? I would certainly be offended if Mickey did that to me.


Lordy...Tom Terrific references.....I'm showin' my age. What would you expect from a silverback cryptid?

Finally a shout-out to that certain infamous deceased infant!!

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 30, 2008 1:04 PM | Report abuse

Oh that frickin Tom Cruise- dude, Katie barely looks like she gets enough sleep let alone up for the task of gettin' pregnant 7 more times.

Meanwhile I agree w/previous posters, lets lay off the pics of Suri. She is only a toddler who is probably tired/frightened of the constant flash of the cameras.

The publicists for Heather Mills must be doing something right- this is the second day in the row that I'm reading about that peg-legged barracuda.

Favorite headline from the Daily Mail today: "'ModFather' Paul Weller avoids arrest after he and girlfriend lay sprawled out in the street following drunken night out".

Posted by: plamar1031 | December 30, 2008 1:04 PM | Report abuse

Hmm. Remember right before she married Tom-crazy, there were a lot of photos of Katie with some kind of cold-sore/herpes outbreak around her mouth? (I don't mean the kind of herpes Paris Hilton has, I mean the stress-induced kind.) Maybe she's under a wee bit of stress from wee Tom?

Speaking of which ... my vote for quote of the week goes to "They better start thawing out some more L. Ron Hubbard if Wee Tom wants more kids." Heh.

It's fun watching Tom-crazy show how nutty he is, but perhaps HE, like Heather Mills, should consider a new publicist. Or even just a publicist.

Posted by: Californian11 | December 30, 2008 1:26 PM | Report abuse

When did Drew Barrymore become Kate Hudson?

I'm not sure which is worst being so drunk you pass out in the street, or dating Paul Weller while sober.

Let's not demonize smokers but I'm all demonizing Michael Lohan.

Posted by: lisjaka2 | December 30, 2008 1:26 PM | Report abuse

How would one be able to ascertain that Victoria Skeleboobs Beckham is annoyed with Beck? How would her expression differ from the norm?

Good point, Sas. So why doesn't Posh smile? Is she afraid that the Ex-lax she must take will kick in at the inopportune moment that she laughs? Is she afraid of frown lines? What other reasons could she have?

Posted by: hodie | December 30, 2008 1:36 PM | Report abuse

Good point, Sas. So why doesn't Posh smile? Is she afraid that the Ex-lax she must take will kick in at the inopportune moment that she laughs? Is she afraid of frown lines? What other reasons could she have?

Posted by: hodie | December 30, 2008 1:36 PM

-------------------------------------------

Dr Hodie, be glad that you're not in Emergency Medicine anywhere near where Skeleboobs lives. Remember the recurring SNL skit about Applachian Clinic, where all the inbreds come into the clinic with various articles stuick in their rectums?

Well, some poor ER Doc probably has had to remove that pickle that Victoria Beckham has stuck up her butt.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 30, 2008 1:42 PM | Report abuse

Who are you planning to stalk with your camera today?

Posted by: newengland1 | December 30, 2008 11:23 AM
----------------------------------------
I've got pictures of Julia Roberts, Laura Bush, John Lithgow, David Hyde Pierce, and that cute frizzy-haired girl from ER.

To go pro I'd have to be able to sell them to somebody.

Posted by: yellojkt | December 30, 2008 1:43 PM | Report abuse

"Rectums" or "Recta"???

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 30, 2008 1:43 PM | Report abuse

hodie
So why doesn't Posh smile?

Maybe her diet consists of sucking on underripe lemons?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 30, 2008 1:44 PM | Report abuse

"Rectums" or "Recta"???

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 30, 2008 1:43 PM

*******************************************

Rectii?

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 30, 2008 1:44 PM | Report abuse

I've seen Kristin Scott Thomas (totally beautiful, very natural and elegant), Goldie Hawn (whoa, very weathered), Norm from Cheers, cch Pounder, and a character actor from ER whose name I don't know.

No pics, though. I just did a double-take. :-)

Posted by: Californian11 | December 30, 2008 1:48 PM | Report abuse

hodie
So why doesn't Posh smile?

Maybe her diet consists of sucking on underripe lemons?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 30, 2008 1:44 PM


-----------------------------------------
Maybe she's one of those monkeys whom Liz told to "Suck it.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 30, 2008 1:50 PM | Report abuse

I've read that pouting creates more facial wrinkles than smiling. Is that true, Dr. hodie?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 30, 2008 1:58 PM | Report abuse

Does Woody's wife still give him a woody?

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 30, 2008 2:12 PM | Report abuse

Favorite headline from the Daily Mail today: "'ModFather' Paul Weller avoids arrest after he and girlfriend lay sprawled out in the street following drunken night out".

Posted by: plamar1031 | December 30, 2008 1:04 PM

I can't wait for Alanis Morrissette to sing at their Maui wedding.

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 30, 2008 2:14 PM | Report abuse

I've read that pouting creates more facial wrinkles than smiling. Is that true, Dr. hodie?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 30, 2008 1:58 PM

Sigh, it is true. But so does smoking so all those smoking starlets out there beware. There is a tradeoff for keeping thin (not to mention the increased risk for the big C)

Sas, the stories I could tell you about my ER rotations! (we all have to do a stint the ER during our training)

Posted by: hodie | December 30, 2008 2:52 PM | Report abuse

hodie, there was a story in my hometown re someone who showed up in the ER after having used a lightbulb, which shattered in place.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 30, 2008 3:01 PM | Report abuse

OUCH!!! I have seen cases similar but not w/lightbulbs. I saw a cucumber case once. To continue with the vegatable theme:
A colleague told me the story of a woman from another country who presented with a vine growing out of her, ( I will use the colorful term used earlier today) hooha. Turns out it was an old-country remedy to use a piece of a yam up there to cure infections. Unfortunately, this old lady forgot about it and the warm, moist conditions were perfect for growing sweet potatoes! You should be glad I waited until after the holidays to share this story.

Posted by: hodie | December 30, 2008 3:13 PM | Report abuse

I can't spell.(vegetable) Multi-tasking . Please forgive my multiple mispellings. You're lucky you don't have to read my handwriting.

Posted by: hodie | December 30, 2008 3:18 PM | Report abuse

hodie, I don't know if I will ever view candied yams in the same light ever again.

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 30, 2008 3:20 PM | Report abuse

Dorkus, I am so sorry! Perhaps you won't remember next Thanksgiving.

Posted by: hodie | December 30, 2008 3:56 PM | Report abuse

On the other hand, why bother with all those messy peat seed starter kits.

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 30, 2008 4:43 PM | Report abuse

I always hated yams; at least now I have a reason for my irrational distaste, so thank you, Dr. hodie.

Courtney Love is a skank, but I totally love that she smacked down PETA. I hate PETA with a passion so intense it frightens me. They make me want to go out and hunt baby seals. With an AK-47. From a helicopter. You betcha!

-The Poster Formerly Known as Snarky Squirrel

Posted by: 7900rmc | December 30, 2008 6:36 PM | Report abuse

Ahh. Love sweet pataters......plan to be yammed out tomorrow. As they say here on Possum Island..."tanks".

Posted by: possum_pouch | December 30, 2008 8:21 PM | Report abuse

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