Network News

X My Profile
View More Activity
Posted at 8:09 AM ET, 02/16/2009

Morning Mix: Chris Brown Apologizes; Heidi Klum 'Too Heavy' for German Designer

By Liz Kelly
Monday

Headlines: Justin Timberlake named America's most fashionable man... Chris Brown "sorry and saddened" about Grammy weekend incident... Salma Hayek marries French businessman... German designer says Heidi Klum is "too heavy" for the runway... Jennifer Lopez brings twins on-stage at Marc Anthony concert... Lily Allen says parents should let kids try drugs... Jude Law and Natalie Portman among contacts on auctioned Blackberry... Angela Bassett questions Woody Allen's commitment to diversity... Ashton Kutcher asks media to interpret his tweets accurately... Peter Gabriel pulls out of Oscar performance over 65-second time limit... M.I.A. gives birth to baby boy.

Rumor Mill: Lilo and SamRo celebrate Valentine's Day with a public squabble, too sick to travel the next day; Lilo still shrinking... Vacationing Amy Winehouse rushed to St. Lucia hospital... Hollywood playboy Benji Madden spotted snogging with Katy Perry... Kate Moss beers her way through fashion shoot; but is she pregnant?

Say What?
"I've had times when my pants split right down the middle when I bent down to reach a note." -- Jessica Simpson, not doing much to quell the whole "fat" thing, to fans at her Madison Square Garden show.

In Case You Missed it: Alec Baldwin as "Gary" Jonas on "SNL"...

By Liz Kelly  | February 16, 2009; 8:09 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Comment Box: Is Angelina to Blame for the Octomom?
Next: Celeb Wedding Trends: Invitations

Comments


Jennifer Lopez brings twins on-stage at Marc Anthony concert....

"The twins, who look remarkably like their father"

Um.

Posted by: jezebel3 | February 16, 2009 8:49 AM | Report abuse

Bad News: German designer says Heidi Klum is "too heavy" for the runway.
Worse News: The man in question designs airplanes.


Woody Allen's "commitment to diversity"? His films are a testament to it: they feature all kinds - neurotics, narcissists, psychotics, sociopaths, depressives, manic-depressives, anti-social disorders, anxiety disorders, auto-eroticists, voyeurs, phobics, etc., etc., etc.


"Ashton Kutcher asks media to interpret his tweets accurately." For fun, print this sentence on a piece of paper and show it to your parents. See if they can tell you what it means.


I guess Peter Gabriel just couldn't find a way to compress "The Lamb Lies Down On Broadway" into a minute-five.


"Amy Winehouse rushed to St. Lucia hospital." Don't you hate it when your vacations turn out to be exactly like your daily life, just somewhere else?


Jess, just like you, I've also had times when my pants split right down the middle when I bent down to reach a note. And just like you, I still missed that note by a country mile. But at least I learned to buy pants that fit.

Posted by: byoolin1 | February 16, 2009 8:57 AM | Report abuse

Heidi Klum could never be too heavy for me.


Woody Allen, if you want to defend yourself, could you do better than bringing up the fact that you married your adopted daughter?


Strangely, I'm not upset about not being able to hear Peter Gabriel at the Oscars.


Alright Lizards, I will see you guys in a couple of months. Take care and keep the snark coming.

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | February 16, 2009 8:58 AM | Report abuse

German designer says Heidi Klum is "too heavy" for the runway...


"Designer Wolfgang Joop told BILD.COM, "She is no runway model. Heidi Klum is simply too heavy and has too big a bust. And she always grins so stupidly."

Wolfgang Joop? Never mind.

Posted by: jezebel3 | February 16, 2009 9:00 AM | Report abuse

Have a nice time at your pretend war, Dorkus. Just try and stay out of the real ones.

Posted by: byoolin1 | February 16, 2009 9:10 AM | Report abuse

Er, "to" - "try *to* stay ourt of the real ones."

Posted by: byoolin1 | February 16, 2009 9:11 AM | Report abuse

Bon voyage, Dorkus, and stay safe. We look forward to your return.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | February 16, 2009 9:34 AM | Report abuse

Do Heidi and Seal's kids sing, "She ain't heavy, she's my mother"?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | February 16, 2009 9:35 AM | Report abuse

There is no way that Heidi Klum will care one bit what some has-almost-been perfume hawker (who used to put an exclamation point after his name) has to say about her bod. She's too smart for that nonsense.

Posted by: kbockl | February 16, 2009 9:40 AM | Report abuse

He's picking up hot women online, seems "millionaire friends .c om". Is he dating some one there?! OMG. Many celebs, beauty queens and wealthy singles are there!

Posted by: ruthcoll | February 16, 2009 9:57 AM | Report abuse

When you consider that there will probably be at least one (if not multiple) huge production numbers at the Oscars, I'd rather hear Peter Gabriel perform "Down to Earth" (or, yeah, "The Lamb Lies Down on Broadway").

The production numbers are usually inane, anyway. I say the Oscars should look long and hard at the BAFTA's.

Posted by: Chasmosaur1 | February 16, 2009 10:01 AM | Report abuse

Keep your powder dry and the sand out of your shorts, Maximus. We'll throw a parade when you get back.

Posted by: yellojkt | February 16, 2009 10:13 AM | Report abuse

When I read that JLo brought out the twins onstage I immediately thought it meant she had some sort of weird nip-slip or she'd started doing topless dancing for her hubby.

Posted by: wadejg | February 16, 2009 10:43 AM | Report abuse

jessica's reaction to her weight is the same sort of honest self-depricating humor she had towards her jackass ex... if that's a window into who she really is then i'm starting to like her a lot more.

hang tough dorkus - do us arbitrarily silly roman named posters proud.

Posted by: quintiliusvarus | February 16, 2009 11:05 AM | Report abuse

Benji does know about Katy Perry's vow of celebacy for a year, right? Course, nothing wrong with just rubbing legs.

Why does Woody Allen need to be committed to diversity? What's that got to do with anything?

Speaking of diversity, has anyone heard any news about how Boy George is doing in the slammer? I figured we'd have some updates by now.

DorkMax -- Happy Trails, until we snark again ...

Posted by: rashibama | February 16, 2009 11:16 AM | Report abuse

Best of luck, Dorkus! We'll miss you.

Hey, Heidi Klum. Bitte baby. You look guten to me.

Justin Timberlake is most fashionable? 1) Somewhere Cary Grant is rolling in his grave, 2) No one said handsome. When you have Justin's face, good clothes are a good idea. Oh, and his head is too big for his body.

I'm conflicted about the Peter Gabriel item. On the one hand, he does have a point about not being limited to 65 seconds and should get to do the whole song. On the other hand, the WALL-E song wasn't all that.

That SNL clip is painful. P.U. Alec Baldwin needs to just say no sometimes. The Jonas Brothers are no actors -- so let's hope no one will come up with the idea of a "Sgt. Pepper" movie remake with those three and Peter Frampton.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | February 16, 2009 11:28 AM | Report abuse

Salma Hayek marries, Dorkus goes off to be a soldier boy. Coincidence? I think not. Take care, Dorkus.

Ashton, they're tweets, not War and Peace. Get over yourself.

I hope Chris Brown doesn't got to DV Rehab then everyone acts like nothing happened. He needs to be punished, AND go to counseling. Then he needs to really campaign against domestic violence, if he wants me to be he is truly sorry and not just apologizing to save his career.

Posted by: epjd | February 16, 2009 11:48 AM | Report abuse

I agree with the above poster, that hearing an entire Oscar nominated song would be preferable to that dreck they insist putting on stage.

Good luck Dorkus. I'll help fill in as Austin's snarker here. Oh, and try not to come back with trench-foot.

Posted by: jelo | February 16, 2009 11:51 AM | Report abuse

Ashton takes himself waaaaay too seriously.

He gets on a couple of the hipper talk shows and starts thinking that people want his opinion on politics.

Ashton, you're just not that important. In fact, If you weren't married to that very beautiful (before the Botox and leeches) but very bad actress, no one would give you a second thought.

Posted by: kjohnson3 | February 16, 2009 12:19 PM | Report abuse

Do Heidi and Seal's kids sing, "She ain't heavy, she's my mother"?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | February 16, 2009 9:35 AM

Well done, Nosy.
Except now my keyboard has diet coke all over it.

Posted by: spartan123 | February 16, 2009 12:40 PM | Report abuse

Chris Brown's next gig is on Oprah.

Posted by: jezebel3 | February 16, 2009 12:46 PM | Report abuse

Dorkus,

Your mission, if you decide to accept it, is to persuade Selma Mayek of the folly of her ways, ditch that rich Frog playboy, and fly her to Lizard Island.

Since extraordinary rendition is still in effect, there should be few, if any issues. If anyone questions you, just have Selma nurse them for a couple of minutes, and they'll be on board...literally.

Carry on, Airman!

Meanwhile, tonight at 2200 Romeo (That's 10:pp.m. EST for you civilians), tune in to watch Bear Grylls do what many of us wish we could make celebrities on our S List do.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | February 16, 2009 12:53 PM | Report abuse

If Justin Timberlake is America's most fashionable man, then I must be real.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | February 16, 2009 12:55 PM | Report abuse

f Justin Timberlake is America's most fashionable man, then I must be real.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | February 16, 2009 12:55 PM

Did you catch Cameron Diaz in the "Cougar" sketch on SNL? Her face is getting a little rough.

Posted by: jezebel3 | February 16, 2009 1:00 PM | Report abuse

Cameron Diaz getting a little rough in the face? Perhaps that's why "America's Most Fashionable Man" dumped her.

Wolfgang Joop doesn't like Heidi Klum's looks? What can you expect from someone whose name rhymes with GOOP (Guten tag, Gwynnie!)....or poop?

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | February 16, 2009 1:16 PM | Report abuse

Today's Oscar Headline:

Peter Gabriel Turns Down Quickie. Says He Wants More Than 65 Seconds to Perform.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | February 16, 2009 1:20 PM | Report abuse

I agree with the above poster, that hearing an entire Oscar nominated song would be preferable to that dreck they insist putting on stage.

Posted by: jelo | February 16, 2009 11:51 AM

I for one am hoping that Hugh Jackman will do all the nominated songs whilst only wearing a Speedo.

Or even better, in his full-on Wolverine get-up! **snicketysnick**

**ohpleaseletsomeoneelsegetthatsnicketysnickreference**

Posted by: wadejg | February 16, 2009 1:30 PM | Report abuse

Designer Wolfgang Joop(!) says Heidi Klum is too fat for das runway. Well, the MC Hammer pants from your Frühling 2009 collection are too ridiculous for the runway.

Posted by: mdreader01 | February 16, 2009 1:36 PM | Report abuse

Will Salma be appearing at the Oscars?

Posted by: jezebel3 | February 16, 2009 1:36 PM | Report abuse

I see through Peter Gabriel's antics. He's just really looking forward to hearing Carlos Santana and Antonio Banderas perform his Oscar nominated tune.

Posted by: mdreader01 | February 16, 2009 1:38 PM | Report abuse

From imdb.com

"A spokesperson for Klum tells the New York Post, "Wolfgang is obviously trying to revive his sagging career and get press for himself by riding Heidi's coattails."

And Klum's Project Runway mentor Tim Gunn has also rushed to her defence, blasting Joop's allegations as hurtful and absurd.

He tells the New York Daily News, "It's totally ridiculous! (Heidi) is a sensitive soul, and it's very troubling to her. If she's fat, other women should throw themselves off a train. I can wrap my hand around her bicep."

Posted by: jezebel3 | February 16, 2009 1:48 PM | Report abuse

Speaking of Oscar presenters, "Tears, jeers and cross-dressing: Oscar night drama in store":
http://www.google.com/hostednews/afp/article/ALeqM5j7RCii4kKGnidLbzY8IKfhmnQpNw

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | February 16, 2009 2:20 PM | Report abuse

wadejg--I don't know the snicketysnickety reference, but the thought of Hugh Jackman in Speedo makes me go "gigity gigity gi-gi-tee".

Posted by: jelo | February 16, 2009 2:34 PM | Report abuse

bye Dorkus! You'll be missed.

Posted by: pras40 | February 16, 2009 3:04 PM | Report abuse

I for one am hoping that Hugh Jackman will do all the nominated songs whilst only wearing a Speedo.

Or even better, in his full-on Wolverine get-up! **snicketysnick**

**ohpleaseletsomeoneelsegetthatsnicketysnickreference**

Posted by: wadejg | February 16, 2009 1:30 PM

---------------

Here is how I know I am too much of a nerd: My brain went, "Hey, I get that reference! But I thought it was supposed to go 'snikt'!"
...And COMPLETELY missed the Hugh Jackman in a Speedo portion of that post. (Of course, now most of my cerebral cortex is occupied by happily going "hur hur hur, purty" to itself.)

Re: Heidi Klum: I was always under the impression that runway models were intended as nothing more than glorified coathangers (in both form and weight). So I'd actually read Mr. Joop's comment as a compliment. Another reading is that she's too good-looking for the runway, because she'd outshine his clothes.

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | February 16, 2009 3:11 PM | Report abuse

And good luck Dorkus! We'll keep a seat warm for you.

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | February 16, 2009 3:12 PM | Report abuse

Bon voyage Dorkus, we'll miss your excellent snark.

I really hope Tim Gunn is wrong and Heidi merely laughs off that ridiculous little man. Agree with Bawlmer--she'd outshine the clothes.

So looking forward to an entire evening with Hugh Jackman. Sigh. And, not that one would necessarily notice, the Oscars have not featured "production numbers" for a couple of years now--I remember Debbie Allen complaining about it when they cut them because she used to choreograph the dancers. The only performances have been of nominated songs.

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | February 16, 2009 3:38 PM | Report abuse

Good catch on the response article, jez. The more I hear about Tim Gunn, the more I like him.

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | February 16, 2009 4:03 PM | Report abuse

The world in which Heidi Klum is fat is the same one where the Germans have a long and distinguished tradition of haute couture. (See also Gwynnie's lederhosen last week.) In other words, some alternate universe. One that I'm perfectly happy not to inhabit, thank you.

Posted by: northgs | February 16, 2009 4:43 PM | Report abuse

"Ach, mein drindl!"

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | February 16, 2009 5:15 PM | Report abuse

The open question is not whether Jessica Simpson's pants were too tight, but whether they were pleated.

Jessica, is that one of your notes on the floor? If so, please bend over and pick it up. There are musical scores missing arpeggios in India.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | February 16, 2009 5:27 PM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
RSS Feed
Subscribe to The Post

© 2011 The Washington Post Company