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Posted at 8:15 AM ET, 03/17/2009

Natasha Richardson in Critical Condition; Madonna Considering Second Adoption

By Liz Kelly
Tuesday

Headlines: Natasha Richardson in critical condition after skiing accident... Madonna considering another Malawi adoption... Tyra Banks says "Top Model" auditions will continue after melee... Andy Samberg will host MTV Movie Awards... Two Heath Ledger-directed music videos set for release... Paparazzi scrum follows Lindsay Lohan to driving school... David Spade provides helmets to troops... Hulk Hogan watches daughter Brooke pole dance at Florida concert... Guy Ritchie and Elle Macphereson do dinner... Jessica Simpson forgets the words to two songs during live show (and it isn't the first time)... Mickey Rourke spends three hours in Russian prison to prep for "Iron Man" role... Mariska Hargitay will return to "SVU" before the end of the season... Don Imus says he has prostate cancer... DJ AM sues for $20 million in jet crash... Carson Daly and girlfriend welcome baby boy... Danny Masterson and Bijou Phillips plan to marry.

Pix & Vid: Salma Hayek InStyle cover.... Usher parties at Paris strip club.

Crime Watch: Anna Nicole Smith's psychiatrist surrenders, posts bail.

Rumor Mill: Amy Winehouse falls asleep in tanning bed... Michael Jackson planning more plastic surgery ahead of London concerts?... Mel Gibson spotted frolicking on Costa Rica beach with mystery woman... Madonna to join Britney Spears for on stage duet... Jennifer Aniston under consideration for role as Bond girl.

Trailer: Drew Barrymore in "Grey Gardens"...

By Liz Kelly  | March 17, 2009; 8:15 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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Next: Julia Roberts: Comeback Kid?

Comments

Mad-Lib Celebrity Headlines:

Amy Winehouse ____(verb)____ in ____(random location)_____.

_____(rap star)______ ____(verb)____ at ___(adult entertainment venue)____.

_____(Female celebrity with shrunken ovaries)___ plans to adopt baby from ____(impoverished nation)______.

That ought to hold us for a week or two.

Posted by: yellojkt | March 17, 2009 8:44 AM | Report abuse

Maybe one of next season's "Top Model" assignments should be a slap fight with Miss Jay.


'Two Heath Ledger-directed music videos set for release.' Many actors say, "What I'd really like to do is direct." Heath Ledger says, "What I'd really like to do is not be dead."


In Hulk Hogan's defence, he sorta had to watch his daughter Brooke pole dance - he creeped out all the regular strippers.

I didn't want to snark on Natasha Richardson earlier because she's got serious brain damage. Now I find myself backed into the same corner with Jessica Simpson.

Posted by: byoolin1 | March 17, 2009 8:46 AM | Report abuse

Mad-Lib Celebrity Headlines:

Amy Winehouse ____(verb)____ in ____(random location)_____.

_____(rap star)______ ____(verb)____ at ___(adult entertainment venue)____.

_____(Female celebrity with shrunken ovaries)___ plans to adopt baby from ____(impoverished nation)______.

That ought to hold us for a week or two.

Posted by: yellojkt | March 17, 2009 8:44 AM

______Obama farted.

Posted by: jezebel3 | March 17, 2009 8:58 AM | Report abuse

It's official, Hulk Hogan has surpassed J. Simpson's dad for the creepiest father award.

This is why Lilo is going into the self tanning business, to protect hardpar....I mean hardworking celebs like Amy.

You say plastic surgery, I say Michael is taking precautionary steps. Wouldn't want anything falling off during Thriller now would we?

Posted by: petalceleb | March 17, 2009 9:26 AM | Report abuse

Aw, I love Natasha Richardson.

Posted by: Trumance1 | March 17, 2009 10:27 AM | Report abuse

wishing the very best for ms. richardson and her family.

Posted by: frieda406 | March 17, 2009 10:38 AM | Report abuse

The Hulk Hogan story....let me just say, eww!

Hey Michael, I hear the Cleveland Clinic does face transplants now!

I would think a tanning bed would pose a serious fire risk for Amy Winehouse. Aquanet is pretty flammable. But I'm not sure what would look better on her, lobster red, from the tanning bed, or Oompa Loompa Orange from one of Lilo's product.

yellowjkt, you made my day.

Posted by: hodie | March 17, 2009 10:40 AM | Report abuse

Perhaps David Spade should have provided a helmet to Natasha Richardson. Seriously, Richardson's injury is likely due to skiing without a helmet. The only people who should ski without helmets are the same people who want to ride motorcycles without wearing helmets.

The Lindsay Lohan Driving School.....sounds like a script for South Park.

From the Brooke-Hulk Hogan story:

In April, Hulk was spotted rubbing suntan lotion on Brooke's butt.

"I know I'm a grown woman, but it's like he's touching an old car," the singer told Us Weekly then.

"He used to change my diaper!" she added.

I see at least three straight lines in the above actualities. Have at it, Lizards.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | March 17, 2009 10:43 AM | Report abuse

drew barrymore is way too young to be playing little edie in grey gardens. the age of little edie is a significant part of what's going on. check out the original documentary by the maysles brothers and the recent broadway production. little edie was played by christine ebersole. leave it to hollywood to mess up the casting. why couldn't ebersole play the role in the film? she's very accomplished.

Posted by: frieda406 | March 17, 2009 10:45 AM | Report abuse

"Jennifer Aniston under consideration for role as Bond girl"

What?

No.

Posted by: VTDuffman | March 17, 2009 10:52 AM | Report abuse

Best wishes to Natasha Richardson, Liam Neeson and their family.

Mariska Hargitay, be well.

Say what you will about David Spade, he does give back to the public in meaningful ways.

(And now on to our regularly scheduled snark.)
Hulk Hogan: On the one hand, it's great that he's supporting his daughter and celebrating her fulfilling her potential, but on the other, he's watching her take her clothes off for money. Not all of her clothes, maybe not even as much as she'd show on the beach, but still.

Wouldn't it be tragic if Don Imus' surgeon were to slip? (And if it's not microsurgery, in this case it might have to be.)

I read that second Pix/Vid item as "Usher parties as Paris strips." Why the latter would ever happen in proximity to the former is a complete mystery, and a sign that I really need more coffee this morning.

(And why couldn't I post this until I switched from IE7 to Firefox? Never been a problem before...)

Posted by: northgs | March 17, 2009 11:00 AM | Report abuse

Sas, you're right of course about the helmets but you still don't see the majority of adult casual skiers wearing them. I have noticed though, it is getting more common and Mr. Hodie and I just bought our first helmets this year. (I'm getting braver in my skiing but not better so we thought we should). Best wishes to Natasha for a full recovery.

Posted by: hodie | March 17, 2009 11:28 AM | Report abuse

A few years back at a bar in Key West I saw a young (didn't think she could have gotten in the bar) girl participating in a "sexy bull riding contest." An older man was helping her on tips for the best way to have her shirt rip off while she was on the mechanical bull... We found out later that the man was her father...
The next round he told her she wouldn't win unless she showed her "patch"... I left promptly after hearing that.

Do the Hogans have family in Key West?

Posted by: Osteph | March 17, 2009 11:39 AM | Report abuse

I think it's very premature to talk about brain damage vis a vis Natasha Richardson.

From the news report:

"Actress Natasha Richardson, reportedly in serious condition with a head trauma in a Montreal hospital after a ski accident Monday at Mont Tremblant, was walking around and feeling fine for an hour after her accident, a Mont Tremblant spokesperson says."

She was taking a ski lesson on a beginner's slope. She fell down toward the bottom "flats." She did not hit any object, nor was she cut, bleeding or suffer any surface trauma.

In fact, it is unclear to me whether the fall caused her head injury. She started suffering severe headaches. The fall could have caused it, but it could be from something else as well.

Posted by: mdreader01 | March 17, 2009 11:45 AM | Report abuse

"why couldn't ebersole play the role in the film? she's very accomplished."

My guess is that she couldn't get out of her rehearsals for "Blithe Spirit" for filming; that's Christine Ebersole's current production.

Posted by: CentrevilleMom | March 17, 2009 12:14 PM | Report abuse

mdreader01:

I understand what you're saying - perhaps the press should back off the scary language of "brain damage".

But if she was fine immediately after and didn't appear to have any big surficial damage, yet fell ill later, she could have given herself a subdural hematoma. It can take hours to days for one of those to present itself, but when they do, they can be very damaging if not treated immediately.

Posted by: Chasmosaur1 | March 17, 2009 12:20 PM | Report abuse

So young girls growing up these days can aspire to pole-dancing. Nice. And Hulk Hugan, you're a pig.

Yep, Madonna's the new Angelina.

Madonna and Britney: Who's Skankier?

Don Imus: Can't muster up any sympathy. That guy is horrific and has the face (and hair and eyebrows) he deserves.

On the other hand, speedy recovery and return to health for the luminous Mariska Hargitay and Natasha Richardson. Although I admit I've always had trouble keeping all the Natashas and Richardsons straight (Joely Fisher, Joely Richardson, Natasha Richardson, Miranda Richardson ...). Kinda like the Dermotts and Dylans (Dermott McDylan? Dylan McDermott? Dermot Mulroney?)

And in other news of people I can't keep straight, is Usher of strip club partying fame the one whose mother died from plastic surgery or whose wife almost died from plastic surgery?

Posted by: Californian11 | March 17, 2009 12:37 PM | Report abuse

Californian, don't forget Bob Dylan or Brian Mulroney.

Donde West - Kanye's mother - died. Usher's wife almost died. The House of Usher fell, and Bishop James Ussher was the guy who calculated the date of creation as October 3, 4004 BC.

Posted by: byoolin1 | March 17, 2009 12:41 PM | Report abuse

Chasmosaur, re Richardson, I concur, a subdural should be included in the differential diagnosis which as mdreader says also correctly, could be just about anything at this point. You and mdreader are two excellent diagnosticians. You are both hired to staff the Lizard Island clinic.

Posted by: hodie | March 17, 2009 12:49 PM | Report abuse

I think that we can thank Sonny Bono and Michael Kennedy for the advent of ski helmets in recreational skiing. About 7-10 years ago, I noticed that a number of skiers and boarders, mostly men of a certain age, started wearing helmets. These middle-aged men were mostly good-very good skiers. The fact that skiers of this caliber wore helmets said something about the risk of skiing and boarding. In my 25 years of skiing, I've witnessed many collisions on the ski slope. The most common collision is skier/boarder with other skier/boarder on a crowded intermediate slope. These collisions often occur at medium-high speed, and often result in cranial injury.

While helmets cannot entirely prevent a cranial injury in all circumstances, wearing one can substantially reduce the risk of suffering cranial injury while skiing-biking-blading-motorcycling.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | March 17, 2009 1:45 PM | Report abuse

Great. I have as much diagnostic experience as former Senator Rick Santorum did when he diagnosed Terry Schiavo from the floor of the Senate.

The ski patrol guys walked Natasha back to her room and didn't leave. They rushed her to the hospital as soon as she complained of a headache. Those are the guys you need to run your clinic!

As for you pro-helmet snarkers, I feel you, but how many people wear them on the bunny slope?

Let's hope she recovers to have a nice, embarrassing tale to tell Conan on his new show.

Posted by: mdreader01 | March 17, 2009 1:49 PM | Report abuse

I am so completely grossed out by the Hogan story it's ruining my morning. Hard to imagine a scenario that makes Joe Simpson look good by comparison, but there you go.

I've haven't worn a helmet skiing since I was three. But then again, since I've been skiing since I was three I'm pretty sensible on a ski slope. Hard to imagine a bunny slope head injury. Big fan of hers and her hubby--hoping for the best.

Said it before and say it again: Jennifer Anniston has a nice girl next door quality to her, but she is not hot. And hot is a prerequisite for Bond girl. Finis.

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | March 17, 2009 2:02 PM | Report abuse

Yeah, Aniston as a Bond girl is just...weird...isn't she supposed to be "the girl next door"? And isn't that the polar opposite of "Bond girl"?

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | March 17, 2009 2:39 PM | Report abuse

Anniston cannot be a Bond Girl. I remember going to a see a movie because I was curious about what Laurie Partridge (Susan Dey) would look like nekkid. Turns out it was about what you'd expect. Same thing would apply to Jen. Few wholesome actresses can pull a Lisa Bonet (Cosby Show/Angelheart).

Mr. Hogan will be inducted to the Skeevy Old Man club with Woody Allen, Billy Ray Cyrus, and honorary member Roman Polanski. Come home, Roman, the cot in San Quentin is getting cold.

Posted by: reddragon1 | March 17, 2009 2:49 PM | Report abuse

And excellent Mad Libs, yellojkt! Mind if I try?

____(former 1980's TV star)____ offered role on _____(desperate major network)_____'s ____(reality show based on everyday activity)____.

_____(Same former star)_____ spotted publicly _____(verb)_____ing with ______(relative)____; ______(name of city)____'s _____(provider of public service, like police, fire, garbage pickup)______ to investigate.

_____(Same former star)_____ to appear in ____(adverb)_____ special with _____(public figure with Dr. in from of their name)____, asking forgiveness for their _____(entertaining and public vice)____.

____(Same former star)____ offered guest spot as judge on ____(desperate cable network)____'s ______(reality show based on public humiliation)_____. Refuses.

____(Same former star)____ spotted dating ____(former child star)____; they break up ____(length of time longer than two minutes but less than a week)___ later.

____(Same former star)____ offered walk-on role in ____(VH1)_____'s _____(reality show based on pimping and boobies)____. Accepts.

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | March 17, 2009 3:02 PM | Report abuse

*double checks* - yep, Vertebrate Paleontology and Geology degrees. Not qualified to be a diagnostician. It's just my year working at a Level I trauma center rearing its' head....

Posted by: Chasmosaur1 | March 17, 2009 3:27 PM | Report abuse

double checks* - yep, Vertebrate Paleontology and Geology degrees. Not qualified to be a diagnostician. It's just my year working at a Level I trauma center rearing its' head....

Posted by: Chasmosaur1 | March 17, 2009 3:27 PM
===========
I've been suspecting for quite some time that Level 1 trauma is what did in the dinosaurs.

Posted by: mdreader01 | March 17, 2009 3:34 PM | Report abuse

I've been suspecting for quite some time that Level 1 trauma is what did in the dinosaurs.

Posted by: mdreader01
~~~~~~~~~~

But Gary Larson told me it was smoking! Although I guess it could be both.

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | March 17, 2009 3:54 PM | Report abuse

I've been skiing since I was 7, and have never crashed into another skier. All my mishaps have been "lone skier" stuff like plowing into the deep snow around a tree and flailing, miscalculating a mogul, misjudging a cornice, etc.. I have to say (at the risk of incurring the ire of snowboarders everywhere) that the danger on ski slopes increased about a bazillionfold when snowboarding was allowed. There are so many reckless, out-of-control 'boarders that I haven't been skiing for years. It's not fun anymore with them on the slopes -- it feels too much like driving on a freeway. There used to be skiers-only slopes; don't know if there still are.

Now, back to the regularly scheduled snark ...

Posted by: Californian11 | March 17, 2009 3:55 PM | Report abuse

Sorcerer's cat, it is the bad skiers you have to worry about. Get a helmet! You'll be suprised how comfortable they are and you can get a nifty one that has speakers built in for your mp3 player.
Going to Copper next week. Looking forward to it.

Posted by: hodie | March 17, 2009 4:04 PM | Report abuse

Californian, go back to skiing. Most major slopes have terrain parks now where the crazy boaders hang out out of skiers hair. Also, most of the inital crazy boarders are grown up now and the new boarders are being taught the right way. I don't find them a problem.

Chasmosaur, you are as qualified to work the Lizard Island clinic as I am to be surgeon general. You're hired. Your trauma experience will come in handy.

Posted by: hodie | March 17, 2009 4:11 PM | Report abuse

Californian, if memory serves, Sonny Bono and Michael Kennedy collided with trees.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | March 17, 2009 4:18 PM | Report abuse

We went to Mont Tremblant in January and I thought it was hazardous b/c it is so crowded at the bottom of the slope - the people zooming down the mountain end at the bunny slope - I kept moving my children out of the way or getting yelled at by the fast skiers. I don't know if helmets are the answer so much as a better traffic flow - when it is fairly empty it's not bad, but it gets horribly crowded.

Posted by: Amelia5 | March 17, 2009 4:43 PM | Report abuse

if memory serves, Sonny Bono and Michael Kennedy collided with trees.

***
they did.

Posted by: frieda406 | March 17, 2009 4:48 PM | Report abuse

My memory of Tremblant is similar to Amelia's. Beginner section is next to the village and crosses at least two of the major lifts. Lots of cross traffic. Think of the NJ Turnpike-Garden State Parkway interchange.

Some ski areas include helmets with their equipment rentals. All ski areas should do so.

Snowboard-free ski areas are rare. Deer Valley, Alta and Mad River may be the only ones left.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | March 17, 2009 4:52 PM | Report abuse

Going to Copper next week. Looking forward to it.

Posted by: hodie | March 17, 2009 4:04 PM

Say hello to the Alpine (Old A-Left)and Superbee (Old B-Lift) runs for me.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | March 17, 2009 5:00 PM | Report abuse

Oh Sas, you just took me back--Mad River Glen! I love their slogan--"Mad River Glen--ski it if you can". Awesome place. Some of the best skiers I've ever seen and nary a "snow bunny" in sight. Do they still have that single chair lift where they give you a blanket to stay warm on the way up?

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | March 17, 2009 5:02 PM | Report abuse

Say hello to the Alpine (Old A-Left)and Superbee (Old B-Lift) runs for me.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | March 17, 2009 5:00 PM

Will do. Hope the snow is still good.

Posted by: hodie | March 17, 2009 5:11 PM | Report abuse

I just checked. The mad River single chair survives. Last of its kind.

Very few ski bunnies in New England, at least the places I go. I remember once being on the Four Runner Quad at Stowe, which runs directly above Liftline, a double-diamond. I looked down and saw a little old lady who must have been in her mid 70s, chugging down Liftline in her 15 year-old white K2s as if she was shuffling off to the store for groceries.
She wasn't stylish, but who cares. My ambition is to be able to get down a double-diamond in my mid 70s.

My other WTF moment was at Smuggs. I was on a lift that runs above Black Hole, a triple-diamond run that is as gnarly as anything I've ever seen. I certainly can't ski it. That day, Black Hole was a 50-degree icy bolder garden. There were two people on the run. The first was local kid, may 9 years old, without poles, on short skis, who was like a rock-hopper penguin as he navigated the boulders, the drops and the yellow-ice patches. About 50 yards behind the kid was a ski patrolman, in his mid 40s, who was having a bad day and working hard, trying to make it down Black Hole in one piece.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | March 17, 2009 5:12 PM | Report abuse

Hodie, look out for the occasional naked boarder off the American Flyer Lift.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | March 17, 2009 5:16 PM | Report abuse

Californian11, your experience with skiing/snow boarders reminds me of my experiences bike riding and the devil's spawn, rollerbladers. They ruined the bike path in the park that I loved to ride in, it wasn't just bike riders, but also walkers and runners that hated them. After having a serious accident on my bike caused by a roller blader, I started riding in the street. I figured I'd rather take my chances with cars.

Posted by: milesdy | March 17, 2009 5:24 PM | Report abuse

A plea to all my island friends - as a reformed snowboarder (I used to be a two planker til I fell in love with being a snowturd/knuckle dragger). And a person who bike commutes, runs (with her dog) and rollerblades on a trail - don't make blanket statements.

I have seen thoughtless people in all modes of perambulation. Skiers, snowboarders, bikers, runners (with and without woofers), walkers and rollerbladers.

The thoughtlessness comes from the person not the perambulation mode.

PSA over!

Posted by: LTL1 | March 17, 2009 5:47 PM | Report abuse

According the the 3-17-09 New York Post, pg. 1 lede story, Ms. Richardson is "brain dead" and is being flown "on life support" to New York City, where her family from both sides of the Atlantic have gathered.

A Redgrave family spokesman is quoted as saying after family and friends waiting in NYC have been able to bid farewell, they anticipate having Ms. Richardson taken off life support.

I've never seen Ms. Richardson in any role, know nothing of her, but just reading she has two young sons, one of whom was with her on the slopes makes this terribly sad.

Posted by: jhbyer | March 17, 2009 7:23 PM | Report abuse

I'm just speculating here but it's possible she may have suffered a cerebral or intracranial aneurysm. Sources reported "Ms. Richardson fell during a ski lesson, but she didn't show any signs of an injury", and there was no mention of her having bumped her head. They said an hour later she complained of having a headache which is consistent with symptoms associated with aneurysms.

I've also been skiing for 25 years, black diamonds and all and I have yet to hit a tree or my head when wiping out. Torn ligament yes but that's another story.

Posted by: depaul_978 | March 17, 2009 7:28 PM | Report abuse

depaul_978, I agree with you that a ski injury, especially on a bunny slope, seems an unlikely cause of her condition.

Reportedly, she "fell" and was helped to return to the lodge, where she said she "felt fine" and had "no apparent injuries".

You know how when you bump your head hard, a bump can be felt soon after? How likely is a brain injury with no visible bump? Severe headaches aren't symptomatic of brain injury.

In any case, very sad.

Posted by: jhbyer | March 17, 2009 7:57 PM | Report abuse

Hi

mdreader01-actually more helmets on the bunny slopes in tremblant than everywhere else. Just back from Holiday

I have been reading about Natasha and I wish her well, it is awful.

Apparently she was on Nansen not a bunny slope just a fairly easy green but right at the top of the mountain. I was there 2 weeks ago and it was very very icy scary at some points (I have been skiing only for two years) Ski school there is great.

I have a helmet (a cool helmet is I say so my self) and I am 32. I fall from time to time but one one slope I cracked my head off the snow it wouldnt have been noticable to anyone watching really but it made my teeth jar and I was glad I had my helmet on (also much warmer and more comfortable tha a hat!) Not on Nansen but on an easyish green slope too (fyi was going down a black with instructer on my last day go me!)

Wear a helmet everyone it is not you you have to worry about it is the out of control person coming down the hill behind you!

Posted by: emmodrate | March 18, 2009 7:36 AM | Report abuse

Jhbyer, I have to get this out there: headaches *are* a symptom of brain injury. Often, they are the *only* early warning of an intracranial bleed, aka a stroke. If the worst headache of your life comes on you suddenly, get yourself to a doctor.

It's possible Ms. Richardson's bump to the head tore something loose; depends on how she fell, what part of her head hit what (thicker or thinner part of the skull, snow vs. ice), and whether or not she had something underlying that we don't know about.

In any case, this is tragic for her family, especially her two sons.

Posted by: northgs | March 18, 2009 9:56 AM | Report abuse

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