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Posted at 8:07 AM ET, 03/31/2009

Rihanna Cooperating with Cops; Alleged Spears Plea Leaked Online

By Liz Kelly

Mike Myers walks the runway at the 7th Annual 'Dressed To Kilt' charity fashion show on Monday in New York. (AP)
Tuesday

Headlines: Rihanna still cooperating with prosecutors, says D.A.'s office... Bill O'Reilly says he'll never watch another Sean Penn movie... Gisele Bundchen says she thinks of Tom Brady's son as her own... Nick Cannon (who has "Mariah" tattooed across his back) gives Mariah Carey a Jack Russell terrier for first anniversary... Michael J. Fox tells Oprah he's not defined by Parkinson's disease... Josh Hartnett hospitalized with stomach pains... Alyson Hannigan gives birth to baby girl... Makeup artist and stylist sue Queen Latifah for alleged unpaid work... "Girl Next Door" Kendra Wilkinson launching her own line of stripper poles... Fire destroys ski lodge co-owned by Bruce Willis.

Pix & Vid: Madonna's son Rocco shows off new mohawk... Paul McCartney's wardrobe malfunction.

Crime Watch: Andre 3000 arrested for driving 109 mph... Matt Dillon pleads guilty to speeding.

Rumor Mill: Alleged Britney Spears plea to lawyer leaked online; did Spears get close to back-up dancer while dad Jamie was away... Brangelina planning to adopt Indian orphan?... More trouble at Oprah's South African school?... "Real Housewife" Countess Luann de Lesseps leaves husband after learning of affair... Drew Barrymore signs on for romantic comedy opposite ex Justin Long... Leonardo Di-Caprio and Bar Refaeli not engaged, says pal.

By Liz Kelly  | March 31, 2009; 8:07 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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Comments

I'm sure Sean Penn is more concerned with a booger in his nose than he is with Bill O'Reilly not watching his movies. He's probably sending B.O.-republican-style a thank you card.

I tend to like Mike Myers (no, I did not see the Love Guru), but good GOD, man! A little higher and we would've seen Little Mikey. Eeeeeewwww.

And Michael J. Fox, I love you, I really do, but saying you're not defined by Parkinsons Disease is saying Lou Gehrig wasn't defined by ALS (aka Lou Gehrig disease). You've become the figurehead for the disease, and while you will be well remembered as Marty McFly and Alex P. Keaton, chances are your work with Parkinsons will be your most impactful legacy.

Posted by: eet7e | March 31, 2009 9:10 AM | Report abuse

Jayzus H. C., Myers! If you're gonna dress like a tool in a kilt at least wear a Maple Leafs jersey and not the sacred Team Canada one, you bat-rastard.


"Bill O'Reilly says he'll never watch another Sean Penn movie." Why, has Penn gone on record as saying he'll never be filmed pleasuring himself with a loofah?


Alyson Hannigan, watch out: Gisele B. might think of your baby girl as hers.


Sometimes I read too fast and comprehension suffers: I thought I read that a "make-OUT" artist was suing Queen Latifah


Kendra Wilkinson launching stripper poles? And I thought the ping-pong balls were impressive.


Paul McCartney's wardrobe malfunction: maybe it was his girlfriend who left him a little de-shevelled. (Her name was Shevell/and she called herself Lil/but everyone knew her as Nancy.)

Posted by: byoolin1 | March 31, 2009 9:10 AM | Report abuse

I would've thought Michael J. Fox would've preferred "not" to be defined by "Doc Hollywood" or "The Secret of My Success."

You gotta love the Daily Mail: "Oops: Macca's flies hang undone unbeknown to him at a climate change event." Perhaps Paul needed global cooling?

Josh Hartnett has stomach pains? Perhaps he finally got around to watching "Pearl Harbor." Took me a while to recover, too.

Are Drew and Justin remaking "I Love You to Death" or "War of the Roses"? I'd settle for a biopic of the post-divorce days of "The Sonny and Cher Show."

Wow, Mike Myers. You're even sadder than before. What the heck happened to you? You were once funny -- I mean reallllly funny. You've now become Middle-Aged Man ("I'm working on it!"). Yikes. Have some dignity, man.


Posted by: td_in_baltimore | March 31, 2009 9:43 AM | Report abuse

man i came rollin in here after reading the story of miss universe at gitmo ready to get my snark on - but alas, i'm left with only Countess Luann de Lesseps and her Courtney Love-esque 'I'm still famous even though the reason I was famous is no longer true'... You will always be the countess... yeah... unless the Count's new Ethiopian friend has something to say about that.

Posted by: quintiliusvarus | March 31, 2009 9:57 AM | Report abuse

Britney,
The last time you got close to a back up singer, it didn't turn out well. Let's learn from some mistakes.

Last night while watching HIMYM, I tried to count the objects they put in front of Alyson Hannigan's prego belly. I came up with box of cookies, guitar, basketball, and small child, but I may have missed some.

Posted by: yellojkt | March 31, 2009 10:03 AM | Report abuse

How does Kendra Wilkinson intend to brand her stripper poles as unique items people should pay a premium to buy? 'Cause 8 feet of pipe and some floor and ceiling mounts aren't exactly rare commodities.

As scary as that pic of Mike Myers is, it's still funnier than "The Cat in the Hat."

Posted by: northgs | March 31, 2009 10:07 AM | Report abuse

So, if you are a makeup artist working for a celebrity in July 2005 and you never get paid, why do you continue to work for said celebrity until February 2008?! It just boggles the mind.

Posted by: JLRGG | March 31, 2009 10:10 AM | Report abuse

Michael J. Fox has a long, illustrious career to define him more than any ailment ever would. Jeremy Piven, on the other hand, should be very, very concerned.

I think LuAnn's problem was that she married a Count in the first place. Any kid who watched Sesame Street would know that the Count...likes to count! "Von ex vife. Ha ha ha ha. Two ex vives. Ha ha ha ha. Three ex vives. Ha ha ha ha. FOUR ex vives. Ha ha ha ha..."

Was Andre 3000 "Up in the Benz" when he was "doin about a hundred miles?"

Imagine the scope of the "wardrobe malfunction" had Sir Paul been wearing pleated pants! Now, do you see why flat fronts are better?

I think Britney's "Circus" may have the highest concentration of straight male back-up dancers in the universe.

I suspect Bill O'Reilly's self-imposed ban on Sean Penn movies is really a huge sacrifice for him. He strikes me as being the sort of guy who memorized the entire script to "Fast Times at Ridgemont High."

Posted by: mdreader01 | March 31, 2009 10:11 AM | Report abuse

A wee verse for y'all...

H-A-double N-I--G-A-N spells "Hannigan"
Named her baby daughter "Satyana"
At least she didn't name her kid "Madonna."

Posted by: mdreader01 | March 31, 2009 10:22 AM | Report abuse

Come on, couldn't someone have whispered to Sir Paul, "XYZ!"

We might have to come up with something stronger than brain bleach 'cause now I have the song "The Scotsman" going through my head and Mark Meyers now is the face of said Scotsman. Please help.

Rocco looks cute in his Mohawk but mom Madge should avoid sporting the "Princess Leia".

Posted by: hodie | March 31, 2009 10:33 AM | Report abuse

Look out India, here comes Brangelina! I was wondering when and where her latest accessory would be adopted ...

Britney sure likes her back-up dancers, doesn't she.

Her own line of stripper poles. Stay classy, Kendra whomever-you-are. When did "stripper" become a career women aspired to? Have we regressed to the Dark Ages?

Posted by: Californian11 | March 31, 2009 10:42 AM | Report abuse

Michael J. Fox has a long, illustrious career to define him more than any ailment ever would. Jeremy Piven, on the other hand, should be very, very concerned.

Posted by: mdreader01 | March 31, 2009 10:11 AM

*****

Maybe it's time for the dangers of sushi-related mercury poisoning to take its place in the national consciousness, and Piven's the guy to do it.

Posted by: byoolin1 | March 31, 2009 10:49 AM | Report abuse

there's something wrong w/me as i like the real housewives of new york. not like, exactly, can't really find the correct word. but i'm drawn to it like a moth to flame. luann is stunning, filled w/a sense of entitlement that will now be gone. have to check the etiquette books to see if a title likes hers stays w/her upon divorce or vanishes into something like "hey, lady".... between her and that fist-fighting byatchy kelly, the show will really have some zip this season.

Posted by: frieda406 | March 31, 2009 10:51 AM | Report abuse

... funnier than "The Cat in the Hat"
... "Von ex wife. Ha ha ha ha."
... "XYZ!"

The National Weather Service reports that the snark level today is High. HILARIOUS!

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | March 31, 2009 10:54 AM | Report abuse

Nice shot at Pearl Harbo[u]r, there, td. :-)

Posted by: byoolin1 | March 31, 2009 11:03 AM | Report abuse

Heads up: A slight change was made to the blog template this morning, so you may notice that things look a wee bit different.

- Liz

Posted by: Liz Kelly | March 31, 2009 11:41 AM | Report abuse

I like the new look.

Posted by: Californian11 | March 31, 2009 11:50 AM | Report abuse

I didn't think Nick and Mariah would make it past month 7 and here we are at one whole year. Wow, just wow.

Posted by: petalceleb | March 31, 2009 11:56 AM | Report abuse

That David Banda is one beautiful child. I'm glad to see that he got to meet his biological Dad. Those madonna kids have got to be going through a hard time now with the divorce, though.

Posted by: msame | March 31, 2009 1:23 PM | Report abuse

Liz, I like the new look too, but I'll either have to increase my screen resolution or pony up for new bifocals to be able to read the comments. (Just an FYI.)

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | March 31, 2009 3:16 PM | Report abuse

Britney, Britney, a "backup dancer" is not a dancer that you back up to.
Well, maybe you do.

Regarding Sir Paul's wardrobe malfunction: Move on folks. There is literally nothing to see here. Heather Mills made sure of that.

From the Mike Myers kilt picture, I think we can reasonably infer that Little Mikey is very little.

"I'll always we the Countess," proclaims Luann, as she orders one of Kendra Wilkinson's stripper poles.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | March 31, 2009 3:48 PM | Report abuse

Memo to: Gisele Bunchen

Although you might have everything you ever wanted...fabulous looks, a great looking guy, a great career, yadda yadda, Bridget Moynahan is John's mom, 100%.
You might feel that way, but it's not truth. And saying it is kind of weird. Earn your own stretch marks.

Posted by: pras40 | March 31, 2009 3:56 PM | Report abuse

Regarding Sir Paul's wardrobe malfunction: Move on folks. There is literally nothing to see here. Heather Mills made sure of that.
******
SCORE!!!!!!!!!!!! great comment. if you were an ebay seller, i'd give you an A++++++++++++++++++

Posted by: frieda406 | March 31, 2009 4:29 PM | Report abuse

I'm not going to snark on Gisele. I think one non-negotiable item for any prospective wife of Mr. Tom Brady would be that she love his kid.

In Gisele's own words, 'I want him to have a great relationship with his mom, because that’s important, but I love him the same way as if he were mine.'

Posted by: mdreader01 | March 31, 2009 5:24 PM | Report abuse

Um, okay, a bit off topic for this thread, but Andy Hallett - aka Lorne on "Angel" - died yesterday of heart failure at 33. :(

http://www.latimes.com/news/obituaries/la-me-andy-hallett1-2009apr01,0,319761.story

He developed cardiomyopathy back in 2004 from an untreated dental infection, and has apparently been in and out of the hospital with heart problems since.

Posted by: Chasmosaur1 | March 31, 2009 7:06 PM | Report abuse

Breaking news
After the exposure of the news Rihanna gave Chris herpes, the member of the largest STD online dating site
==== STDslove.c o m ====
increase quickly. The users on that site said Rihanna has an account on that site. Do you believe it?

Posted by: stdsgirl | April 1, 2009 9:06 AM | Report abuse

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