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Posted at 8:00 AM ET, 04/21/2009

Madonna Gets Adoption Appeal Hearing; Young 'Slumdog' Star's Father Arrested

By Liz Kelly
Tuesday

Headlines: Malawi court to hear Madonna adoption on May 4... Police report makes no mention of paparazzi in Madonna horse tumble... Spokesman says Jackie Chan's comments were taken out of context... Breaking News! Brangelina shop at upstate New York grocery... Liam Neeson makes first public appearance since wife's death... Matt Damon turned down Kirk role in new "Star Trek"... Snoop Dogg wax statue unveiled in Las Vegas... Neil Patrick Harris caught on fire during TV Land Awards rehearsal... Ailing Farrah Fawcett throwing birthday bash for partner Ryan O'Neal... Sarah Silverman arrives wow on Twitter... Khloe and Kourtney Kardashian get their own reality spin-off... Kim Kardashian says she's curvy, not plus-sized... David Blaine to marry French model... Ioan Gruffudd ("Fantastic Four," "Horation Hornblower") and wife expecting first child... Lunch with Rosie O'Donnell and Star Jones up for auction.

Crime Watch: Young "Slumdog Millionaire" star's father arrested, he says he was "tricked" by U.K. tabloid... Tyler Perry stalker threatened murder.

Pix & Video: Amy Winehouse's mismatched legs... Jay Leno does drag for Susan Boyle spoof (video)... Halle Berry rocks flip-flops at "Soloist" premiere.

Rumor Mill: Sources say Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel have not split... Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt to officially marry Saturday... Vegas club sends out press release about Lindsay Lohan's libation choice; Lilo in talks to appear in burlesque review? (second item)... Michelle Rodriguez does her best to ruin manager's wedding weekend.

List: Movie Stars Who Die the Most

Say What?
"It was an awful movie. It was like a horse's body with a cow's head." -- Ben Affleck's opinion of "Gigli", the movie he made with ex Jennifer Lopez.

By Liz Kelly  | April 21, 2009; 8:00 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Jake Gyllenhaal, Ab-solutely Cheezy
Next: Susan Boyle -- From Obscurity to Stardom to Unlikely Lightning Rod

Comments

"Movie Stars Who Die the Most"

The list is stunningly thin and inaccurate.

Posted by: jezebel3 | April 21, 2009 8:43 AM | Report abuse

"Brangelina shop at upstate New York grocery..."

Long Island is "upstate" New York? LOL!

Posted by: jezebel3 | April 21, 2009 8:46 AM | Report abuse

On no planet in the all of the universe can Kim Kardashian be considered a size friggin' two. And Kim dear, "curvy" and "curves" are code for "flab" and "blubber".

Posted by: jelo | April 21, 2009 8:49 AM | Report abuse

"Former singer" Amy Winehouse? Ouch, that's gotta hurt - and I don't mean the weird sunburn thing.

Posted by: StuckatWork | April 21, 2009 8:51 AM | Report abuse

How much do I have to pay so that I don't have to have lunch with Rosie and Star?

Posted by: Amelia5 | April 21, 2009 9:35 AM | Report abuse

Madonna adoption appeal


Police report makes no mention of paparazzi in Madonna horse tumble...


New celebrity MadLibs game: "______ says ____________'s comments were taken out of context." (Remember, we've already used the names Brooke & Hulk Hogan, Jackie Chan & Spokesperson this week.)


Brangelina shopping at grocery store: more or less newsworthy than First Family farting? Discuss. (All papers to be graded by our very own jezebel3, so provide supporting documentation.)


Neil Patrick Harris, that's why they hired Michael Jackson to do your stunts. Let the man work.


No doubt Farrah Fawcett's birthday bash Ryan O'Neal will include the most depressing rendition of 'Happy Birthday' ever performed.


"Lunch with Rosie O'Donnell and Star Jones up for auction." Let's hope it's not buffet style, or the winner will go home hungry.


"It was an awful movie. It was like a horse's body with a cow's head." No, Ben, it was more like a horse's ass with a cow.

Posted by: byoolin1 | April 21, 2009 9:51 AM | Report abuse

So Neil Patrick Harris was flaming?

Posted by: beaker1 | April 21, 2009 9:58 AM | Report abuse

So Neil Patrick Harris was flaming?

Posted by: beaker1
*************************

Ba-dump bump.

Posted by: jelo | April 21, 2009 10:01 AM | Report abuse

I apologize for the unfinished snark at the top of my previous post.


"Police report makes no mention of paparazzi in Madonna horse tumble." Hmmm. That's how the whole Princess Diana thing started too, isn't it? And the adoption thing going on at the same time. There's some kind of conspiracy at work here. And have you noticed that galabs2000's posts about ScarJo being a clone have been getting shorter and shorter? It's all tied together somehow, I'm sure of it. Someone needs to get to Mel Gibson's mysterious friend Oksana and find out what's going on.

(Also, I can only hope that the above loosely describes the "plot" of Khat & Kooze Kardashian's 'reality spin-off.')

Posted by: byoolin1 | April 21, 2009 10:03 AM | Report abuse

So now we know what Bruce Jenner does all day--sews "Size 2" labels in all Kim's clothes. Must be like a sweatshop in that house.

Posted by: beaker1 | April 21, 2009 10:05 AM | Report abuse


So the photographer has shots of the fall before and after but not during. You know it is hard to focus those cameras when you have hooves in your face.

I think Matt Damon turned down the role of Kirk because buddy Ben Affleck wouldn't put on the pointy ears to play Spock.

Farrah, why do you do so much for Ryan O'Neal? What has he done for you lately beside get thrown in jail when you need him most?

Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt to officially marry. Again? How many times is this?


Posted by: hodie | April 21, 2009 10:44 AM | Report abuse

Slumdog Actress's father. Can't we start a home for these people? Or maybe a new kind of deprogramming rehab. The Billy Ray Cyrus Center for "Your Kid is not an ATM."

Halle Berry can wear anything she wants. She can rock anything. Or nothing, for that matter.

When I read that Neal Patrick Harris was "on fire" I didn't realize it meant he was "ON FIRE." As Richard Pryor said, "when you're on fire, people get out of your way."

Maybe that's what happened to Amy Winehouse's leg.

Posted by: reddragon1 | April 21, 2009 10:56 AM | Report abuse

Excuse me while I become one of those posters I love to hate....

LIZ, IT'S HORATIO. "O." NO "N."

IT'S OK, REALLY. I DO THE SAME THING ALL THE TIME.

I will return to my snark now.

Posted by: mdreader01 | April 21, 2009 11:00 AM | Report abuse

I know Liz doesn't like to repeat themes this week, but I must say that so far, the winner this week appears to be the all powerful gossip machine.

Not only are paparazzi so powerful, they can make Madonna's horse throw her off--without actually being present...

But one of their ring leaders, Perez Hilton, is powerful enough to make the front runner in a beauty contest say something utterly nonsensical...

they can dutifully report that a couple I didn't know was together hasn't split

and they've driven LiLo to burlesque.

Posted by: mdreader01 | April 21, 2009 11:06 AM | Report abuse

I'm just grateful that when Neil Patrick Harris caught fire, he was no where near Snoop Dogg's wax statue...

But then, come to think of it, are we sure that Snoop Dogg statue is made completely out of wax?

Posted by: mdreader01 | April 21, 2009 11:11 AM | Report abuse

I see I've been beaten to the punch with the Richard Pryor, Michael Jackson and flaming comments for NPH. Was he singing a Doors/Jose Feliciano song at the time of the incident? C'mon, Neil, light my fire.

I believe "upstate New York" refers to Albany, Syracuase, etc. rather than Long Island. (Though not perhaps to Long Islanders.)

Matt Damon would've been hilarious as Kirk, though I imagine hilarity wasn't the exact approach to the part that the producers sought. (Isn't Chris Pine the son of Robert Pine from CHiPs? Would love to see Randi Oakes as Nurse Chapel.)

Wasn't it once reported here that Sarah Silverman had signed a book deal? Was a Twitter all she could manage? Perhaps Julia Stiles can help; I hear she writes.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | April 21, 2009 11:17 AM | Report abuse

Breaking sausage news: Jimmy Dean's house caught fire. Jimmy and his wife are fine. Neil Patrick Harris questioned about his whereabouts, but says he has an alibi.

In a related story, Rosie O'Donnell and Star Jones were both seen in the area.

Posted by: mdreader01 | April 21, 2009 11:34 AM | Report abuse

Long Island is not upstate NY. Get a clue.

Posted by: novany | April 21, 2009 11:43 AM | Report abuse

Brangelina shop at upstate New York grocery..."

Long Island is "upstate" New York? LOL!

Posted by: jezebel3 | April 21, 2009 8:46 AM | Report abuse
****************************

No kidding - I got all excited that they were at my hometown at the Johnson City Wegmans, only to be very disappointed!

Posted by: suzannepdc | April 21, 2009 11:44 AM | Report abuse

Long Island is not upstate NY. Get a clue.

Posted by: novany | April 21, 2009 11:43 AM | Report abuse

Clue - very few Jew-fros in upstate NY.

Posted by: jezebel3 | April 21, 2009 11:52 AM | Report abuse

"Tyler Perry stalker" -- And I thought the phrase "David Caruso stalker" was hitting rock bottom. Someone has an unhealthy attraction to Madea? That is so wrong.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | April 21, 2009 11:53 AM | Report abuse

byoo,
you thinkin' malawian hit squad? that's what i'm thinkin.

Posted by: memphis1 | April 21, 2009 12:09 PM | Report abuse

Wasn't "Malawian Hit Squad" the name of the band Susan Boyle was in before she went on "Her Majesty's TV Singalong"?

Posted by: byoolin1 | April 21, 2009 12:21 PM | Report abuse

mdreader,

"N" is Horatio Hornblower's little-known middle initial.

Posted by: reddragon1 | April 21, 2009 12:23 PM | Report abuse

Amy Winehouse's leg is the grossest thing I've seen since that Dead or Alive guy's (Pete Burns?) messed up collagen lips.

Posted by: spartan123 | April 21, 2009 12:30 PM | Report abuse

ROFL, mdreader01 !

WHO CARES:
- what size one Kardashian skank is? (Famous for, as far as I can tell, a father who hid evidence of a murder, a sex tape and a Playboy spread (and I use that term literally)).
- what the other Kardashians do?
- that Brangelina was in a grocery store? (Shopping for the kids, no doubt, as she sure doesn't eat.)

I thought Farrah and Ryan broke up a long time ago?

LiLo in a burlesque? Don't you actually have to have a body to do burlesque properly? Who wants to see a coked-up stick figure?

Posted by: Californian11 | April 21, 2009 12:35 PM | Report abuse

So what IS wrong with Amy Wine-o's leg? Dr. Hodie? The two legs look like they are different colors, too.

Posted by: Californian11 | April 21, 2009 12:44 PM | Report abuse

Amy Wine-o's leg resembles that of the ex-jelo, when his mountain bike slid down a concrete embankment at a steep angle for about 20 feet. Result=a roadrash-wound to make even the steeliest of nerves feel jangled.

Posted by: jelo | April 21, 2009 1:06 PM | Report abuse

I'm SHOCKED, SHOCKED, I tell you, to see the Snoop Dog wax statue. Anyway, it doesn't really look like Snoop. The real Snoop would be holding a smoldering blunt in his other hand.

The article on Neil Patrick Harris includes the line, "He just had some welts on his back," a source reveals. "He didn't have to be taken to a hospital or anything like that." Nothing to worry about, folks. Just a little backstage S&M.

For the record, Kim Kardashian IS curvy. I have it on good authority that "curvy" is how you say "bubble butt" in Armenian.


Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | April 21, 2009 1:42 PM | Report abuse

So what IS wrong with Amy Wine-o's leg? Dr. Hodie? The two legs look like they are different colors, too.

Posted by: Californian11 | April 21, 2009 12:44 PM
===============
Maybe she's comparing LiLo's self tanner to a 1st degree solar burn.

Posted by: mdreader01 | April 21, 2009 2:59 PM | Report abuse

So what IS wrong with Amy Wine-o's leg? Dr. Hodie? The two legs look like they are different colors, too.

Posted by: Californian11 | April 21, 2009 12:44 PM

I can't see the pic, Californian. Do you have a non-TMZ link?

Posted by: hodie | April 21, 2009 3:17 PM | Report abuse

Perhaps Madonna could adopt a horse. She could adopt a little mare and name it Sara Jessica.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | April 21, 2009 3:40 PM | Report abuse

hodie, you don't want to see that picture--it's disgusting. Having said that, it looks like she had a burn on her leg--maybe two layers of dermis.

Every time I read about Madonna and being thrown from the horse I keep thinking of that horrible incident in Florida with the polo ponies. God, it must have been awful.

Kardashians, your seats on the Manhattan Project are waiting for you--first class to accommodate your "curves"--get on board, stat!

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | April 21, 2009 5:33 PM | Report abuse

I don't, hodie, sorry. Amazingly our filter let me see the TMZ pic. sorcerers_cat explained it -- looks like layers of skin peeled off. The thing that threw me is that the legs look like they are different colors! Maybe it's the lighting.

Posted by: Californian11 | April 21, 2009 6:07 PM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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