Mercy Joins Madonna in London; Rihanna Due on Stand Today

Doug Reinhardt's Life Lesson For The Day: Riding on your girlfriend's coattails is *completely different* than riding on the coattails of the family into which you were born.

Alec Baldwin penning parenting book... and they say irony is dead in America.

Lady GaGa's explosive performance reminds me of an old Elton John song:
"She's got electric boobs/and a mohair suit/you know I read it in a magazine"

Introducing Will.I.Am to Perez Hilton: "Black Eyed Pea, Black-Eyed P.H.. Black-Eyed P.H., Black Eyed Pea."

"Cop shows Sarah Jessica Parker how to turn on her headlights" is odd if only because of all the times on SATC where she's got her high beams on.

In addition to Balswin's tome, here are more books I won't buy:

Wesley Snipe's Tax Guide

Jack Black's Guide To Fitness

Singing Lessons With Miley Cyrus

Nobody notice that I misspelled 'Baldwin' did they?

Alex Baldwin is using Dina Lohan as a ghostwriter.

yellowjky, to that list I would add:

Autoerotic Asphyxiation for Dummies, by David Carradine (too soon?)

Meanwhile, you stay classy, Perez Hilton

And by yellowjky, I of course meant yellowjkt. Coffee, please.

Click on the Anniston-Cooper article and tell me how many beards you see in that picture.

ASinMoCo,
Not to nitpick, but even Weingarten knows to leave out the 'w'. ;b

...although I *would* buy anything in the "For Dummies" series that was written by Heincer, since they're clearly leaders in that field.

My bad, yellojkt. Definitely not enough caffeine yet.

I just like to brag that Weingarten picks on me.

Where do I send the thank you note to Will.I.am?

I am already frightened of that version of Alice in Wonderland.

As far as the parenting book goes, those who can do, those who can't write a book.

Perez Hilton claims that Will.I.Am assaulted him, well I am claiming Perez Hilton assaulted my eyes too early on a Monday morning with those pants. Eeek!

Didn't we lizards a few months ago suggest that Johnny Depp do Alice in Wonderland?? Yes, I think we can claim credit (or blame).

Just watched He's Just Not That Into You this weekend. I say nice choice Jen, but watch out for ScarJo.

Well at least Gisele will know for sure that this baby is 100% hers.

Maybe Will.I.am can sing a song to Perez to make up for smacking him down. I'm a jaw breaker, I'm a jawbreaker.....

Anyway, I can't say I blame him.

ASinMoCo - you know it's NEVER too early here on the Island.

Forgot to send my Friday love the The Swayze and Mrs. The Swayze - so here it is, double-extra lurve, good thoughts, and prayers!

Well at least Gisele will know for sure that this baby is 100% hers.

Posted by: supersonic2 | June 22, 2009 10:01 AM |
********************
Oooooo weeee - we have a winner by 10:00!

I just like to brag that Weingarten picks on me.

Posted by: yellojkt | June 22, 2009 9:36 AM
-------------------------------------------
Weingarten also brags about picking his nose.

I've been in meetings since early this morning. When I read the story about SJP's headlights, I knew that punch line had already been taken.

Byoolin, you need to get your Mondegreen right. The correct misheard lyrics are:

"She's got electric boobs
And her mom, does, too."

This is much kinder than Robert Palmer's misheard observation about Michael Jackson.

Weingarten also brags about picking his nose.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot
-----------------------------
Don't give him ideas. The knock-knock tweets jokes are bad enough.

Is Perez Hilton trying to do a Don Cherry in drag?

Lady Gaga, much like Angelina Jolie, looks like a freakin' walking STD.

Lady Gaga, much like Angelina Jolie, looks like a freakin' walking STD.

Johnny Depp looks like Madonna in that pic....

Filed at 11:01 a.m. ET
NEW YORK (AP) -- Ryan O'Neal says he plans to marry Farrah Fawcett, who is struggling to overcome cancer.
The 68-year-old actor says in an interview with Barbara Walters for ABC's "20/20" that he asked his longtime companion to marry him and "she's agreed." O'Neal says they will tie the knot "as soon as she can say yes."
Walters' interview with O'Neal airs Friday...
O'Neal says the 62-year-old actress is "fighting for her life," but despite her declining health, they will "absolutely" get married.

Meanwhile, Jane ("Malcolm in the Middle") Kaczmarek and Bradley ("West Wing) Whitfield are divorcing after 16 years of marriage, 3 kids; didn't most of us figure they had a pretty solid marriage, by show-biz standards? Sad for all parties concerned.

Congratulations, Madonna!

Perez is looking even more desperate than usual. Is he auditioning for "Wipeout"? Why else would be try to out-ugly Insane Shane with those pants?

I'd rather see "Linday" [sic] Lohan and Ryan Seacrest collaborate on a personality.

Time to predict the name of Levi McConaughey's little brother or sister. May I suggest Lee? (Unisex, and easier to spell than either Toughskin or Jordache.)

td,
my vote is wrangler or lucky....

it's a good thing they're not into naming kids after shoes... then we might be subjected to:

Fluevog McConaughey

Sas, you're right about the Mondegreen. Please excuse me while I kiss this guy.

Sas, you're right about the Mondegreen. Please excuse me while I kiss this guy.

Posted by: byoolin1 | June 22, 2009 11:54 AM
-------------------------------------------
Be my guest, Byoo.

Meanwhile, I have to attend to the call of nature. But I'm in luck.

There's a bathroom on the right.

Oh, Canada
We stand on cars and freeze.....

To Mr. Mondegreen: Baby, you're my centipede.

My favorite medical Mondegreen: Fireballs of the Eucharist.

Oh, Canada
We stand on cars and freeze.....

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | June 22, 2009 12:14 PM | Report abuse

Jose, can you see?

LOL memphis1 on Wrangler McConaughey. Lee can be the middle name?

Just read the Perez/will.i.am link. While I can't condone Perez (or anyone) getting a black eye, I must say that it's hard to decide what I DO like best in the story:

1) His real name is Mario Lavandeira (We need a new name for him; MarioLa?)
2) His pouty face in the photo (Kind of an unhappy, adult Dennis-the-Menace)
3) He was at the club with Lady Gaga (Amy Winehouse was busy?)

Q: When you are "punched from behind," how do you get a black eye?

Big smiles on the mondegreens this morning! There's a columnist in San Francisco that has been writing about them for years--some funny columns to be found here:
http://www.sfgate.com/joncarroll/mondegreens.shtml

Saw "The Proposal" over the weekend. Utterly predictable and formulaic rom com, but exactly what I expected so it was fun. I hereby revise my earlier "meh" to the Ryan Reynolds discussion--his low-key comic delivery is brilliant. I fell for him in this movie. And then to top it off, Entertainment Weekly arrived in the office mail this morning featuring RR's rather splendid torso. ScarJo is a lucky girl!

I'm conducting an informal poll to settle a disagreement this weekend re Bradley Cooper. Women: Do you find him sexy or see him as too "guy's guy" smarmy?

Guys can weigh in too, but the disagreement was mostly about what women think of him.

re: Bradley Cooper, the only role I ever remember him in is HJNTITY, which I saw this past weekend. I vote for HOT, even though I disliked his character in the film.

On bradley cooper - I first 'met' him in Alias where he was a good guy, so yeah crush worthy...

Done a good job playing jerky guys since then though...

HJNTITY???????

HJNTITY = He's Just Not That In To You

The feeling is mutual.

Thanks sas... I am super bad with acronyms...

Sorry LTL, I was tired of typing it out...

US APNewsAlert, 6 minutes ago

LOS ANGELES (AP) — Chris Brown's attorney says a plea deal has been reached in the singer's felony assault case.

Settlement reached in Chris Brown's alleged beating of Rihanna [Updated]
2:09 PM PDT | June 22, 2009
http://latimesblogs.latimes.com/lanow/2009/06/settlement-might-be-near-in-chris-brown-case.html

A plea deal has been reached between Los Angeles prosecutors and pop star Chris Brown, who is accused of assaulting singer Rihanna before the Grammy Awards.

Brown will plead guilty to a felony and receive six months in jail or community labor -- such as graffiti removal or trash pickup -- and five years' formal probation. He will also undergo domestic violence counseling. Judge Patricia Schnegg said he will be allowed to complete counseling, community labor and probation in his native Virginia, but is to be treated there like any other offender.

[Updated at 2:15 p.m.: Schnegg says she plans to issue "a stay-away" order barring Chris Brown from having contact with Rihanna. But an attorney for Rihanna said she doesn't want the order. Sources told The Times that Brown's camp initially rejected the plea agreement and had been mulling the settlement for several days.]...

rihanna's commitment to testify is the only reason this clown entered into a plea deal. if she had not agreed to do that, no way. and some on here dismissed my comment some time back that she would testify and it would make a difference. her decision to go forward made him realize he would never win. it wasn't ever a matter of the truth for him. it was whether he could get out of it. finally, to be held to some form of accountability.
p.s. his lawyer is not very good. high profile, but not very good.

One of the good things about coming late to the lizard party is I laugh myself silly over all the witty bon mots.

Gee, imagine learning how to use your new car before you, you know, drive it off the lot.

And Sarah, please, eat something. Those clavicles could cut diamonds.

Johnny Depp and Helena BC are PERFECT for Alice in Wonderland. Great actors with just enough eccentricity and reputations for taking on totally cool and wacky roles (Edward Scissorhands, anyone?)

Hey Cali--yeah, it's great to get here late and read everyone's stuff, but all the great lines have already been scooped! ;-)

I agree re Depp and HBC--seriously, I can never understand the backlash about her. I think she's fabulous. In everything.

Frieda--I don't think anyone dismissed your comment so much as lacked confidence that her testimony would be fully truthful about the incident. There is a long and sad history of abuse victims softening or recanting when actually called upon to testify. And her atty saying she doesn't want the "stay away" order doesn't inspire confidence. Having said all that, I would agree that even the fact of her testifying at all probably scared the Brown camp into the plea deal. Pity he won't get the jail time--you just know they'll give him the community service option.

Hoping all of our DC area lizards and their friends and families are safe--the Metro accident looks terrible. Prayers for the victims.

Hey, DC based Lizards, check in and let us know you are okay. Will ask again in the morning.

ep, I assume you mean re the Metro crash.

Frieda, check out the surfing dogs at the end of the NBC Nightly News (with Brian Williams) tonight. Frankie will be so-o-o-o-o jealous!