Network News

X My Profile
View More Activity
Posted at 8:39 AM ET, 07/21/2009

Chris Brown Posts Video Apology to Rihanna; Cowell Says Paula Abdul Will Return to 'Idol'

By Liz Kelly
Tuesday

Video: Chris Brown posts apology for Rihanna incident...


Headlines: Katherine Jackson says she won't contest her son's will... Joe Jackson blames doctor for Michael Jackson's death... brother Jermaine Jackson doesn't want Michael buried in a public cemetery with "bad people"... Simon Cowell confident Paul Abdul will return to "Idol"... Production on Mischa Barton's new TV series postponed... "Harry Potter's" Emma Watson to attend Brown University... Former Miss California Carrie Prejean lands book deal... In video, Beastie Boy Adam Yauch announces "treatable" cancer diagnosis... Ashton Kutcher posts fake pic of a mohawked Demi Moore on Twitter... Adrian Grenier spotted volunteering at New York food co-op... Gerard Butler partly credits self-help book "The Secret" for his career success... Jennie Garth returning to "90210" this fall... Miley Cyrus's brother takes his break-up to Twitter... Foxy Brown and Toni Braxton targeted by IRS for unpaid taxes... Onetime "Jackass" Bam Margera rushed to hospital for "possible overdose"... Phil Spector's first wife reported missing.

Crime Watch: "Burn Notice's" Jeffrey Donovan arrested on suspicion of DUI.

Rumor Mill: Kevin Federline plots return to reality TV... "Pal" says Mischa Barton's dark side cost her friendship with Nicole Richie... Jennifer Love Hewitt and Jamie Kennedy engaged?... Cicely Tyson allegedly smacks fellow attendees at gathering for Nelson Mandela.

Say What?
"Certain journalists have written horrible things, and then they've got cancer, or they've had a tumour, or they’ve died. And it's terrible for them, but they’ve done really evil things. I truly believe things come back around." -- Heather Mills, crediting karma for taking care of her critics

By Liz Kelly  | July 21, 2009; 8:39 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Gunning for a Baldwin Run? Where's Lucy Lawless?
Next: Chris Brown's Apology -- Are You Buying It?

Comments

Heather Mills karma must not be too good since she lost her leg first. If she can't heed that warning sign . . .

Posted by: ronjaboy | July 21, 2009 8:56 AM | Report abuse

Jermaine, the Missionaries of Charity called. They've turned down your request to bury Michael with Mother Teresa.

That Joe Jackson headline would be so much funnier if it were the singer Joe Jackson and not the child abuser Joe Jackson.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | July 21, 2009 9:03 AM | Report abuse

If Heather Mills is right, everybody here at Celebritology is in big trouble.

Aw, flock it. Good dad or not, I can't WAIT to see KFed go down in a fresh new ball of flames.

Posted by: kbockl | July 21, 2009 9:08 AM | Report abuse

Miss California's book deal is more proof of Mencken's adage that nobody ever went broke underestimating the intelligence of the American public.

(That's "Mencken," Carrie. He was a writer. [sigh] Yes, like you.)

Posted by: byoolin1 | July 21, 2009 9:23 AM | Report abuse

kbockl
If Heather Mills is right, everybody here at Celebritology is in big trouble.

Fellow Lizards, we may already have a viable contender for Quote of the Day! Or, at a minimum, today's bar has already been set very high.


Cicely Tyson allegedly smacks fellow attendees at gathering for Nelson Mandela.

I wonder whether Tyson is getting senile. Or, if that's typical of her normal disposition, maybe now we know the real reason Miles Davis did drugs.


Ashton Kutcher posts fake pic of a mohawked Demi Moore on Twitter.

Am I the only one who actually likes that Ashton lampoons pop-cultural phenomena?


Adrian Grenier spotted volunteering at New York [Brooklyn] food co-op.

Item author James Poniewozik adds that his wife has also spotted actress Hope Davis at the co-op, as well as a cast member of "The Wire." He goes on to say that he thought "it was nice to see [Grenier] walking the walk, eco-wise."

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | July 21, 2009 9:35 AM | Report abuse

Former Miss California Carrie Prejean lands book deal.

Maybe some folks will confuse it with Stephen King's "Carrie."

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | July 21, 2009 9:37 AM | Report abuse

Clearly the Jackson family doesn't want to bury Michael at all. They should just go the Juan Peron route and have him embalmed for public display like Evita.

Posted by: jes11 | July 21, 2009 9:40 AM | Report abuse

Former Miss California Carrie Prejean lands book deal.

On the other hand, I doubt anyone will confuse her with Sister Helen Prejean ("Dead Man Walking").

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | July 21, 2009 9:40 AM | Report abuse

Simon wants Paula back because he wants to make sure that a woman with tremendous "ideas" is sitting next to him at the judges table.

Posted by: GroovisMaximus61 | July 21, 2009 9:44 AM | Report abuse

'Simon Cowell confident Paul Abdul will return to "Idol"'

I guess "Paul" doesn't want to be forever your girl...

Posted by: MzFitz | July 21, 2009 9:46 AM | Report abuse

From now on, blame it on Heather Mills.

I thought Demi looked suprisingly good in a mohawk.

Posted by: hodie | July 21, 2009 9:46 AM | Report abuse

Every time the Jackson family farts...

Posted by: jezebel3 | July 21, 2009 9:46 AM | Report abuse

Q: What's that ridiculous thing on Jennifer Love Hewitt's arm?
A: Jamie Kennedy

Posted by: molsonmich | July 21, 2009 9:51 AM | Report abuse

Wow! Vengeance is my sayeth Heather Mills. Would she be willing to explain what evil thing caused the loss of her leg?

Posted by: jes11 | July 21, 2009 10:00 AM | Report abuse

jes11, you may be on to something. Enclose Michael in glass like Vladimir Lenin. Change his clothes once in a while (the Thriller jacket, the sequined socks, the glove, the burqa). Sell tickets and souvenir postcards.

Hate to quibble, but I don't think Cicely Tyson's slapping two people on the arm is the same as "smacking" them, which implies she ran around the room whacking people on the face at random. Not excusing her behavior, mind you. Either way, lesson learned: You don't mess with Miss Jane Pittman.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | July 21, 2009 10:03 AM | Report abuse

td - your description of Cicely Tyson going on a random face smacking rampage resulted in coffee through my nose...ow. Funny, but really ow.

Posted by: VaLGaL | July 21, 2009 10:09 AM | Report abuse

Could Ms. Tyson have been at the Jackson Memorial? There were several celebs(?) there who deserved a face smacking. She can still stop by the Jackson family home. Enough already with the family talking. Gags for all of them.

Heather Mills, wow, just nasty. You still haven't figured out why people don't like you.

Posted by: epjd | July 21, 2009 10:13 AM | Report abuse

Maybe Heather Mills was Paul's karmic retribution for Wings. The universe said "Yeah - we've had enough silly love songs, already."

Posted by: GroovisMaximus61 | July 21, 2009 10:24 AM | Report abuse

Groovis, I won't blame you because it is clearly Heather Mills' fault that I now have "Silly Love Songs" stuck in my head. I'm sure she would call it karma for the pirate jokes.

Posted by: hodie | July 21, 2009 10:43 AM | Report abuse

Is Heather Mills trying to take credit for the death of Walter Cronkite?

Posted by: zn123 | July 21, 2009 10:53 AM | Report abuse

I just picture Heather Mills with this giant whiteboard in her apartment next to her computer (think the board on the TV show "Homicide" if any of you watched that).

Each day a Google News Search for "[journalist name] dead" gives her up-to-the-minute living/dead info with which to update the board. Death today? Rewrite name on board in red. Check name off master list in BlackBerry. Smile smugly.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | July 21, 2009 11:06 AM | Report abuse

I have a theory about Jermaine and the some of the other Jackson brothers about Neverland. I think they spent their happiest times there with their kids, just hanging out, without having to pay one dime for it. And they'd like the fun to continue.

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 21, 2009 11:13 AM | Report abuse

zn
Is Heather Mills trying to take credit for the death of Walter Cronkite?

I don't think Cronkite ever reported on Mills, although he proudly took credit for airing first story on the Beatles in the US (leading to their making a fabulous fortune, a portion of which she got as her divorce settlement, so she really has no cause to complain).

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | July 21, 2009 11:14 AM | Report abuse

Regarding, "Toni Braxton targeted by IRS for unpaid taxes" (with apologies to mdreader01, who surely would do a much better job at this than I):

UNBREAK MY BANK
Don't leave me in all this debt
Don't leave me out and forget
Come back and bring back my dough
Come and take these tears just go
I need your arms to hold my cash
The IRS, unkind
Bring back those nights when I held some equity

Un-break my bank
Say you'll float me again
Undo this hurt you caused
When you audited me
And walked into my life
Un-pry these bills
I've tried so many times
Un-break my bank

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | July 21, 2009 11:15 AM | Report abuse

Ok td & Groovis, I now have the image of Cicely Tyson running around smacking people in the face to the tune of "Silly Love Songs" firmly planted in my mind. Probably a good thing I have no interviews scheduled.

Posted by: jes11 | July 21, 2009 11:30 AM | Report abuse

Kevin Federline plots return to reality TV...
--I won't believe it until I see him arm-in-arm with Kate Gosslin.

Ashton Kutcher posts fake pic of a mohawked Demi Moore on Twitter...
--Looks like Ashton's spending more time with his cheap camera phone than he is with the expensive SLR he hawks on TV.

Cicely Tyson allegedly smacks fellow attendees at gathering for Nelson Mandela.
--Let's just be glad it was Cicely and not Mike.

Jermaine Jackson doesn't want Michael buried in a public cemetery with "bad people"...
--And the whole world has to answer right now just to tell you once again...who's bad? Shamon.

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 21, 2009 11:42 AM | Report abuse

Muy excellente, TeeDee.

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 21, 2009 11:43 AM | Report abuse

Groovis just pushed the bar a little higher....

Posted by: memphis1 | July 21, 2009 11:45 AM | Report abuse

td, you are on a roll today. I loooooved Homicide, and Unbreak My Bank truly rocks. But I think Comment of the Day would have to go to Dorkus, "Maybe Heather Mills was Paul's karmic retribution for Wings."

Posted by: reddragon1 | July 21, 2009 11:47 AM | Report abuse

Jermaine Jackson doesn't want Michael buried in a public cemetery with "bad people"...
--And the whole world has to answer right now just to tell you once again...who's bad? Shamon.

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 21, 2009 11:42 AM | Report abuse

Rimshot for mdreader. Bravo

Posted by: hodie | July 21, 2009 11:51 AM | Report abuse

the Jackson family doesn't want to bury Michael at all. They should just go the Juan Peron route and have him embalmed for public display like Evita
***
or lenin.

Posted by: frieda406 | July 21, 2009 11:51 AM | Report abuse

sorry, td, missed your lenin zinger in my first read through. hat tip.

Posted by: frieda406 | July 21, 2009 11:53 AM | Report abuse

Groovis, I won't blame you because it is clearly Heather Mills' fault that I now have "Silly Love Songs" stuck in my head. I'm sure she would call it karma for the pirate jokes.

Posted by: hodie | July 21, 2009 10:43 AM |
===================
You asked for it....here's a piece:

Fate doesn't come in a minute
Sometimes it doesn't come at all
I only know if you step in it
Heather will wish you get a big tumor, get cancer or take a fall...

You'd think that people would have had enough with silly tabloids.
I look around me and I see it isn't so. Oh no.
Some people want to fill the world with silly rumors.
And what's wrong with that?

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 21, 2009 12:11 PM | Report abuse

JJ doesn't want MJ buried in a public cemetery with bad people?

Well excuse the h*ll out of me, but I can assure him that my dear (and dead) husband does not want to be buried in a cemetery with MJ. Of all the bullacious cr*p I've heard about what to do with MJ's remains, this pretty much takes the cake.

Posted by: Vosora | July 21, 2009 12:15 PM | Report abuse

Each day a Google News Search for "[journalist name] dead" gives her up-to-the-minute living/dead info with which to update the board. Death today? Rewrite name on board in red. Check name off master list in BlackBerry. Smile smugly.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | July 21, 2009 11:06 AM
===================
Wow. So Heather's to blame for Perez Hilton getting all roughed up a few weeks ago?

Shame about it. I thought he brought that on himself.

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 21, 2009 1:08 PM | Report abuse

Gerard Butler claims to have a direct channel to the metaphysical Powers That Be. He claims to use The Secret technique for imagining success so that success happens. I keep using The Secret technique during my commutes to get other drivers to use their turn signals, but it never seems to work. Am I setting my sights too low?

I would ask Gerard Butler to imagine making Heather Mills' leg look like the other one, but I don't want to get a terminal illness any time soon.

Whom will Carrie Prejean's book be "written with"? Hey, what about that Mark Sanford guy? I hear tell he has a flair for romantic prose.

If Jermaine Jackson is worried about the risk of Michael being buried next to "bad" people who are not his kind, all he need to is to bury Michael in the NAMBLA section of the cemetery.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 1:29 PM | Report abuse

Bam Margera proves that being a jackass is not a one-time event, but a lifestyle.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 1:31 PM | Report abuse

Sas
I would ask Gerard Butler to imagine making Heather Mills' leg look like the other one...

Do you mean making the left leg match the right, or vice versa? Knowing you as we do virtually, I suspect the latter.


"The Secret" is obviously hooey.


Why not just have MJ cremated and scatter his ashes in the ocean? Unless the fishes and marine mammals would object to his having been a bad person...

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | July 21, 2009 1:37 PM | Report abuse

"Do you mean making the left leg match the right, or vice versa? Knowing you as we do virtually, I suspect the latter."

I would tell you if doing so wouldn't risk Heather Mills making me contract Adenocarcinoma.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 1:42 PM | Report abuse

Or why not cremate Michael, mix his ashes with a kilo of cocaine, and send the box to Keith Richards?

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 1:44 PM | Report abuse

King of Pop creamed in online butter statue vote
By Melanie S. Welte, Associated Press Writer | July 17, 2009

DES MOINES, Iowa --Jesus Christ and his apostles made the cut. So did John Wayne, Elvis and Tiger. But Michael Jackson will not have his buttery likeness displayed at the Iowa State Fair in Des Moines this summer, after support for a creamy statue of the King of Pop melted in an online vote.

Kent Lehs, a manager with the Midwest Dairy Association, which sponsors the display, said Friday it wasn't a question of Jackson's achievements that drew complaints.

"They were more pointed toward what they felt they understand Michael Jackson's reputation was and not as a singer and dancer, but more some of the things he was implicated on in his personal life," said Lehs.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 1:49 PM | Report abuse

Sas, maybe the soybean, corn and canola growers would like to sponsor a margarine MJ?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | July 21, 2009 2:07 PM | Report abuse

byoolin and sas: Tied for Quote of the Day. ROFL.

Is Twittering/Tweeting/whatever it's called a really poor excuse for being a terrible speller (see Jennifer Love Hewitt's fiance-du-jour)?

Posted by: Californian11 | July 21, 2009 2:41 PM | Report abuse

Cicely Tyson does a Mike Tyson on the crowd.

Hold onto your ears, folks!

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 2:59 PM | Report abuse

Sas, maybe the soybean, corn and canola growers would like to sponsor a margarine MJ?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | July 21, 2009 2:07 PM

--------------------------------------------
I think that they'd want to reserve that honor for living vegetables, like Heidi Pratt or Elizabeth Hasselbeck.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 3:02 PM | Report abuse

Sas
living vegetables

SPLOOT!

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | July 21, 2009 3:06 PM | Report abuse

Sas
living vegetables

SPLOOT!

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | July 21, 2009 3:06 PM

---------------------------------------------
Hey!!! Quit throwin' celebrity vegetables at me!! I'm havin' a helluva time getting this Paris Hilton splatter off my pants.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 3:35 PM | Report abuse

The irony of the Heather Mills comment is that, if she's right that karma comes around on people who do bad things, she's in for a rough life.

Sas, I will no longer be able to look at some of our celebrity vegetables again without imagining them with broccoli head. Thanks for that!

Does anyone have an antidote for a persistent earworm of "Silly Love Songs"? It's making me ill.

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | July 21, 2009 3:50 PM | Report abuse

If I may paraphrase, S. Cat:

An antidote doesn't come in a minute/
sometimes it doesn't come at all./
I only know that when I get it/
Love isn't silly/
It isn't silly/
Love isn't silly at all.

Posted by: byoolin1 | July 21, 2009 3:54 PM | Report abuse

Guilty pleasure time: I actually *like* that song. (Granted, it's no "Magneto & Titanium Man," from Venus And Mars, or "Morse Moose And The Grey Goose," from London Town, but it's a lovely little tune.)

Posted by: byoolin1 | July 21, 2009 3:57 PM | Report abuse

"...but it's a lovely little tune."

Oh yeah? So's this:

LiLo
LiLo
It's off to work you go.
To snort some coke
And play the 'Ho
LiLo
LiLo.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 4:13 PM | Report abuse

About a week ago I was complaining to Ms. Snatchquatch about the Michael Jackson Media Funeral Frenzy.

She said, "Wait till Paul McCartney dies."

The horror!

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 4:15 PM | Report abuse

Sorry, SoCat. I take some responsibility for your earworm.

I suggest hopping over to iTunes and downloading "Tropical Island Hum."

You can thank me later.

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 21, 2009 4:16 PM | Report abuse

OK. A final ode to Hatin' Heathah:

When you were young and your heart was an open book
You used to say live and let live
(you know you did, you know you did you know you did)
But when the critics take to tabloids and to Twitter
It makes you give in and cry
Say live and let die
Live and let die
Live and let die
Live and let die

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 21, 2009 4:25 PM | Report abuse

Yeah Sas, but Paul McCartney is already OLD!!! Won't be such a shock when his number is up.

Posted by: hodie | July 21, 2009 4:25 PM | Report abuse

When Paul McCartney dies, we'll be hearing all about how "Coming Up" was a "classic," "Give My Regards to Broad Street" was "underrated," and wow, could that Linda ever SING!

Heather Mills will publish a memoir, "Getting a Leg Up: My Life with Paul," the U.K. press headlines will be something like "Macca in the Sky with Jesus" and the ladies from "The View" will opine that the Beatles never really existed.

Ringo's only public statement will be to the fact that -- last-surviving Beatle or not -- he still won't sign any autographs. So don't even TRY it.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | July 21, 2009 4:39 PM | Report abuse

Yeah Sas, but Paul McCartney is already OLD!!! Won't be such a shock when his number is up.

Posted by: hodie | July 21, 2009 4:25 PM

But if he's the last Beatle to go, it'll be madness - a cave in the Hindu Kush won't be far enough away to escape the hagiography. I'd bet the funeral would compare favorably to Lady Diana's in pomp and splendor.

Posted by: northgs | July 21, 2009 4:40 PM | Report abuse

Hey, Paul McCartney is NOT all that old. Harrumph!

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | July 21, 2009 4:53 PM | Report abuse

I think I'm relatively safe in predicting that there will not be a Mass Media Funeral Frenzy for Captain Beefheart when he dies.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 21, 2009 6:26 PM | Report abuse

Chris Brown--His apology is actually creepy. When he said " I told Rhinana over and over..." Reminds me of Ike Turner " I told Anna Mae over and over to eat the cake."

Good for Adrian Grenier for volunteering in his community.

I don't like Carrie Prejean stance on gay rights but I don't believe it was right to ask the question as a litmus test to get the crown. Christianity has to progress.

Posted by: 411Tibby | July 22, 2009 8:55 AM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
RSS Feed
Subscribe to The Post

© 2011 The Washington Post Company