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Posted at 9:28 AM ET, 07/ 6/2009

Los Angeles Braces for Jackson Tribute; Jon & Kate Spend the 4th Together

By Liz Kelly

Headlines: 1.6 million fans vie for tickets to Tuesday public Michael Jackson memorial | Where to watch... Jon and Kate Gosselin celebrate July 4 together with kids... Tom Cruise celebrates 47th birthday in Australia... "Harry Potter's" Rupert Grint recovering from Swine Flu... "Transformers" director Michael Bay says Megan Fox needs to grow up... Tori Spelling writes children's book... "T.J. Hooker" set for big screen adaptation.

Pix: Miley Cyrus in August's Elle... David and Victoria Beckham's new Armani ad... Rihanna's intentional wardrobe malfunction (NSFW).

Video: Madonna pays tribute to Michael Jackson at London concert...

More: 1996 footage of Michael Jackson deposed by lawyers.

Rumor Mill: Michael Jackson had surgery days before death... Department of Children and Family Services investigate Jackson's kids... Former bodyguard says Jackson had secret girlfriend... Justin Timberlake and Jessica Biel headed for break up?... Chris Brown hooks up with sometime Kanye West girlfriend Amber Rose?... Courtney Love and daughter trash New York hotel room.

Say What?
"It is bizarre, certainly in Hollywood, when you hit 23 [and] people start to ask you, 'How does it feel to get older?'" -- Carla Gugino laments the entertainment industry's age fixation.

By Liz Kelly  | July 6, 2009; 9:28 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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Rupert Grint, just say "swinegardium leviosa" and make that flu fly away. Duh.

Is Tori's kids book called, "Adventures in My Home Bowling Alley"? Page One: Dedicated to my mother. At least I think she is my mother. I could never find her in that big house. But I've seen photos. And she talks to the press about me.

Hey, Madonna. News flash: Michael Jackson's death? Not. About. You.

Imagine watching fireworks with Kate Gosselin. . . .

KATE: "Jon, that roman candle just sputtered. Can't you do anything right?"

JON: "Kate, I am just watching the fireworks like you are. I have nothing to do with the pyrotechnics of this event."

KATE: "Excuses. Oh my God, I see an ember! Maddie, give me that water bottle. We are too close. Jon, move the blanket, you idiot!"

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | July 6, 2009 9:48 AM | Report abuse

Jon and Kate Gosselin thought it was important to give the kids the kind of fireworks they were used to.

Tom Cruise is 47 in Australia; how old is that in American years?

Is Justin Timberlake giving sexy back?

It's so sweet that Courtney & Frances Bean still do things together. Usually teenagers don't want to do anything with the 'rents.

Say What? That Carla Gugino must have quite a memory to remember what 23 was like.

Posted by: byoolin1 | July 6, 2009 9:52 AM | Report abuse

Swine Flu has a totally different meaning at Hogwarts.

A T.J. Hooker movie???! Really. Hollywood has just scraped bottom.

Is Miley 18 yet? What are her parents thinking? Oh yeah, I know. $$$$$

Courtney can trash a room just by being there. File this under non-news.

Posted by: hodie | July 6, 2009 10:06 AM | Report abuse

" "T.J. Hooker" set for big screen adaptation." -- Please God, let them give Shatner a small part so we don't have to hear his whining about how he was not included.

Re: the MJ memorial, I heard on the news that L.A. is picking up the tab for this. Shouldn't the Jackson family pay for this?

Posted by: zn123 | July 6, 2009 10:07 AM | Report abuse

"TJ Hooker" movie? Hollywood has officially run out of original ideas...

Posted by: Section416akatheAlps | July 6, 2009 10:25 AM | Report abuse

As someone who had a cancerous lesion removed once, I consider myself somewhat of an expert on the topic.

- If it was caught early, it would be removed after a couple of injections of Novecaine. You would not have to be put under for this surgery.

- He would still have stitches after a week. Skin doesn't heal that fast and given Michael's multiple nose surgeries and the weird condition of his skin in that area to begin with, I doubt his skin would have healed in less than a week.

- There's not a ferocious amount of pain that you'd need a prescription pain killer. Naproxen Sodium (Aleve) would suffice.

Also...what ever happened to all the news about the MRSA scare a few months ago?

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 6, 2009 11:14 AM | Report abuse

Miley to America:
"The jeans are my favorite part of the entire line. Because, like, literally, this is going to be good for, like Middle America, and it will be great for kids that really want to be in fashion but they don't have it available."

--Miley, it's not that "Middle America" doesn't have fashionable jeans, it's that America's middle can't fit into fashionable jeans.

"[Megan Fox] says some very ridiculous things because she's 23 years old, and she still has a lot of growing up to do," says Michael Bay.

--Michael, Sarah Palin is twice her age, so simply "growing up" isn't enough.

"Former bodyguard says Jackson had secret girlfriend."

--This site is blocked to me, so I can only speculate that the source meant to say "imaginary."

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 6, 2009 11:27 AM | Report abuse

Michael Jackson died of a broken heart because his girlfriend left him.

One day, while they were engaged in zesty foreplay, Jacko bit his girlfriend on the nipple. She farted at him through her nipple, flew out the window, and flopped, limp and lifeless, over a telephone line.

Moral of the story: If you are Michael Jackson and you're gong to get rambunctious with your female companion, always have a bicycle tube patch kit handy in case of sudden deflation.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 6, 2009 11:34 AM | Report abuse

Sas, I thought Michael's 'secret girlfriend' was about 4 feet tall with wild red hair and a striking resemblance to Chucky.

Your theory is probably better.

Posted by: jes11 | July 6, 2009 11:59 AM | Report abuse

Move that Tom Cruise celebrate all his birthdays in Australia. Not that I have anything against Australians. Except maybe that movie, which wasn't as bad as it could have been.

Michael Bay gets the Obviousman award of the day.

T.J. Hooker the movie won't be the same with out the large size Shat in the title role. That's as opposed to the current supersize ginormous suitable for blimping Shat.

If Miley doesn't turn into the Brittany of the 20-teens, it won't be because her parents didn't try.

Unfortunately video is blocked at work, so I will have to wait til I get home to see actualy footage of the King being deposed.

I thought Michael's former bodyguard was lying until I saw that Uri Geller backed him up. I'm assuming Uri psychically bent the spoons MJ used for drugs.

Posted by: reddragon1 | July 6, 2009 12:35 PM | Report abuse

Mr DiLeo is said to have told a friend: "The brothers wanted Michael to be driven through the streets so fans could line up and throw flowers like they did with Princess Diana, but Katherine has ruled that out.

-- Depending on what section of Los Angeles you drive through, it would not be flowers that they were throwing.

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 6, 2009 12:36 PM | Report abuse

"That's as opposed to the current supersize ginormous suitable for blimping Shat." --reddragon1

Thanks for the visual. I'm seeing a big PRICELINE on his side, floating over the crowds in the Macy's parade between Snoopy and Clifford the Big Red Dog.

Nice Uri Geller reference, too.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | July 6, 2009 1:30 PM | Report abuse

Yeah, Michael Bay, Megan needs to "grow up" because Transformers 2 really was all about the acting. (I can't believe I'm defending her, but COME ON!!!)

td, excellent call on swinegardium leviosa! Am unashamedly looking forward to HP on the 15th.

Seriously, I don't know whether to admire how shamelessly Madonna promotes herself or keel over from how relentlessly she does it. Paying tribute to Michael Jackson? Sheesh.

As for the city of LA paying for MJ's service instead of the family, I dunno. Does anyone know if there was a handling fee or something on the ticket lottery for Staples and Nokia to cover the expenses? I mean, as terrible as this sounds, it wouldn't surprise me if the Jacksons charged admission if they were in charge of it.

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | July 6, 2009 1:50 PM | Report abuse

This poem puts Michael Jackson in perspective.

Who will cry for the little boy
by Antwone Fischer

"Who will cry for the little boy, lost and all alone?
Who will cry for the little boy, abandoned without his own?
Who will cry for the little boy? He cried himself to sleep.
Who will cry for the little boy? He never had for keeps.
Who will cry for the little boy? He walked the burning sand.
Who will cry for the little boy? The boy inside the man.
Who will cry for the little boy? Who knows well hurt and pain.
Who will cry for the little boy? He died and died again.
Who will cry for the little boy? A good boy he tried to be.
Who will cry for the little boy, who cries inside of me?"

Posted by: NiftyDuchess | July 6, 2009 2:29 PM | Report abuse

sorcerers_cat, But ya gotta admit the ho can sing.

Posted by: reddragon1 | July 6, 2009 2:54 PM | Report abuse

I can only imagine what Miley's photos will be like when she turns 18.

Speaking of which, I think Rihanna looks real cute with those little star things. Good for her.

Posted by: rashibama | July 6, 2009 3:03 PM | Report abuse

I thought the space for the MJ tribute (and I presume expenses related to the ticket lottery) was donated by AEG, the company that owns the Staples Center and Nokia Theater and was behind the concert tour. However, this leaves Los Angeles footing the bill for crowd control, which is governmentspeak for police overtime. Probably FD/EMS overtime too.

Agree w/ Sorcerer's Cat that if the Jacksons were in charge, they'd charge admission.

Posted by: northgs | July 6, 2009 3:12 PM | Report abuse

Dunno, reddragon, I've honestly never been a fan.

Northgs, you're right about the distribution of expense. If the crowds they're expecting do show, it's going to be EXPENSIVE!!!!!

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | July 6, 2009 3:29 PM | Report abuse

They're now releasing a list of who plans to appear and perform at tomorrow's Michael Jackson tribute.

Mariah Carey, Jennifer Hudson, Stevie Wonder, Smokey Robinson, Usher, Andre Crouch and his Choir...these people make sense.

John Mayer does not make sense. Although he is probably very familiar with the lyrics, "She's Out of My Life."

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 6, 2009 4:57 PM | Report abuse

No Jacko impersonators?!?!

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 6, 2009 5:29 PM | Report abuse

No Jacko impersonators?!?!

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | July 6, 2009 5:29 PM
I'm still holding out hope for Usher's stirring rendition of "In the Closet."

I failed to mention that list includes Lionel Richie, so we'll probably get his stirring rendition of "Wanna Be Startin' Somethin'" just so he can do the "Mama say mama sa, ma ma mu sa" part and break into the bridge part of "All Night Long."

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 6, 2009 5:49 PM | Report abuse

Oh, and while Madge's tribute was visually arresting, the weirdest on-stage tribute was Bono, mashing up "Angel of Harlem" with "Man in the Mirror." Look it up on You Tube. It's pretty horrible.

On the side, you'll see the link to the Philippine Dancing Prisoner Tribute. My favorite part is where the nuns come out. Check it out!

Posted by: mdreader01 | July 6, 2009 5:52 PM | Report abuse

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