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Posted at 11:00 AM ET, 09/21/2009

Brad Pitt's Flat-Footed Fashion Foible

By Liz Kelly

Possessed, as I am, of unimpeachable fashion sense and nary a bad look captured by a paparazzo, I am confident that you will cede to my essential rightness when I pronounce Brad Pitt's monogrammed loafers an abomination:

(Getty Images)

While a man possessed of Pitt's good looks could probably wear stale hollowed-out baguettes as shoes without raising an eyebrow, the monogrammed shoe surpasses the absurd, the merely ugly, the regrettably trendy. These self-referential kicks veer into an ick-nast territory occupied by a motley crew of self-lovers and the insecure -- Martha Stewart, Liberace, Laverne De Fazio.

Let this be a warning to all -- but particularly any men who may possibly live in my house -- that a monogrammed shoe, especially one bearing two-inch practically neon initials, are every bit as as egregious a fashion no-no as the dread pleated pant. And, at least the fashion-challenged can blame the presence of pleats on their ready availability. For one sporting a monogrammed shoe, well, let's just say we'll know you went to some pains to acquire the nasty things.

Brad Pitt at a photocall for 'Inglourious Basterds' at Spain's San Sebastian Film Festival. (Getty Images)

It should be pointed out that Pitt's shoes were apparently a gift from an assistant. (An assistant who apparently hates Pitt and wanted to make him the object of sustained ridicule.) I point out this foible, though, because some man out there will see these shoes and think Pitt is on the level and emulate the look.

Oh, and if you'd like to similarly uglify the feet of a loved one, surf on over to By Paige, a site that will personalize a set of needlepoint zebra-striped flats for her for $158. Or, for a look closer to Pitt's, add a monogram ($85) to Belgian Shoes's "Mr. Casual" suede loafers ($350). Perhaps after a token wearing of the 'grams, Pitt can donate his pair to British Petrol CEO Tony Hayward.

By Liz Kelly  | September 21, 2009; 11:00 AM ET
Categories:  Brangelina, Fashion  
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An "abomination," Liz Kelly?

Thought experiment: it's 5am and you're running late for your flight to Cannes to appear on the red carpet in support of "Ingouminimus Illegitimates," your new bloodbath epic from director Robert Altman. You're just about completely dressed and ready to leave, but when you get to the closet in the front hall, it's a mess: all of the footwear you own, and that of your six kids, one wife, and an ex-gf who won't stop pining over you in the media are in that closet.

Wouldn't you like to have your initials on your own damn shoes right about now?

Posted by: byoolin1 | September 21, 2009 11:23 AM | Report abuse

I think byoo's got it right there. (That would also explain why the monogram appears to be done with glow-in-the-dark thread. It's so he can see them in the closet without having to turn the light on!)

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | September 21, 2009 11:38 AM | Report abuse

Are we sure those are supposed to be his initials and not his new gig as the spokesman for an energy company?

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | September 21, 2009 11:42 AM | Report abuse

Sorry, the guy has an assistant who can dig through the shoes the night before and set Brad's out. No need to go all neon.

Honestly that monogram looks like it was done by one of his kids.

Speaking of bad shoe choices - Sandra Oh last night at the Emmys. Lovely,classically elegent gold dress with bright RED shoes. Check the color wheel. Does not work.

Posted by: epjd | September 21, 2009 11:43 AM | Report abuse

ep: "that monogram looks like it was done by one of his kids."

Maybe that explains things. Brad Pitt surely wouldn't be the kind of dad who would say, "Listen, Shiloh, Zahara, and you four nameless kids, those shoes you made for me look stupid and I won't wear them."

He's a good dad who's taking one for the team.

Posted by: byoolin1 | September 21, 2009 11:50 AM | Report abuse

Looks like the type of shoes grandpa would wear with his plaid shorts and white socks.

Posted by: hodie | September 21, 2009 12:29 PM | Report abuse

Frankly, I'm more offended by the beard.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | September 21, 2009 12:35 PM | Report abuse

Maybe they're a gift from the oil company?

It might be more helpful to him if he had an L and an R on them.

Posted by: Stormy1 | September 21, 2009 12:47 PM | Report abuse

Frankly, I'm more offended by the beard.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore

That's no way to talk about Angelina.

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | September 21, 2009 12:57 PM | Report abuse

BP = bad press

Posted by: kvs09 | September 21, 2009 1:45 PM | Report abuse

Hey..if there was a swinging post Emmy hot tub party, where every one stripped down to skivvies or less, including shoes, then Pitt's choice of footware is a genius..nobody else can wear them if they say BP.

Posted by: sarahbonnie1 | September 21, 2009 2:02 PM | Report abuse

The letters look like they came out of the Alpha-bits cereal box and were glued onto black loafers.
That's one of the worst fashion faux pas I've seen. Right up there with that 'actress' who wore the Pres. Obama tablecloth to the Emmy's last night.

Posted by: pras40 | September 21, 2009 2:23 PM | Report abuse

sarahbonnie1 is on to something. Perhaps at that aforementioned Emmy hot tub party, Brad's clothes got mixed up with Bill Paxton's. (Not a visual I need, though.)

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | September 21, 2009 3:32 PM | Report abuse

*shrug* I think he - like George Clooney - like to gently mess with the media. They are big practical jokers. And I'm willing to wager these shoes were some sort of dare/joke.

Posted by: Chasmosaur1 | September 21, 2009 3:41 PM | Report abuse

I think Chasmosaur has it. Somebody lost a bet...

Posted by: northgs | September 21, 2009 3:58 PM | Report abuse

jettison the assistant who gave him the shoes as a gift. what kind of gift is that? and you can't regift. he's stuck.
unless it is a clooney joke. even then, they're just awful.

Posted by: frieda406 | September 21, 2009 4:37 PM | Report abuse

I'm with the lost a bet/practical joke theory. I suddenly envisioned Danny and Rusty--

Rusty: I hope you were the groom.
Danny: Ted Nugent called. He wants his shirt back.

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | September 21, 2009 5:28 PM | Report abuse

It's not as big of an abomination as your ugly face, Liz.

Posted by: bendan2000 | September 21, 2009 11:02 PM | Report abuse

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