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Posted at 10:42 AM ET, 10/12/2009

Who Is Lola? Who Cares?

By Liz Kelly

Beyonce created the robot-like "Sasha Fierce," Mariah Carey toyed around with the in-need-of-emancipating "Mimi," Garth Brooks alienated his fans with the gothy "Chris Gaines" and now -- coinciding with the release of a new single -- Jennifer Lopez has her own alter ego: Lola.

She's even created a Web site, (could that be a bigger Beyonce ripoff?) for Lola. Right now it seems to contain only a quick clip of the single and the following copy, that reads like J. Peterman catalog copy reworked by "SNL:"

She was mysterious... she was like someone I never met. She appeared and then she was gone. Lola has reinvented sexy... the word can now be replaced with LOLA!

Oh, and a Twitter feed containing only this tantalizing tweet: "Lola here. What's my deal? Well, wouldn't you like to know..."

Not particularly, but since you asked, Lola (if that is your real name) let me try to sum things up based on the facts at hand:

You: An aging second-rate pop star who, despite a lack of serious talent, has managed to make serious cash. This enables you to do all sorts of ill-advised things, like make bad movies with Jane Fonda (and Ben Affleck, Matthew McConaughey, and husband Skeletor Marc Anthony, co-star of "El Cantante."). And, in between all the movie-making, you release overproduced singles every now and then that tend to fall flat. As far as I can tell, your career apex seems to have been the press you received for wearing a revealing dress to the Grammys in 2000.

So, did I nail it or what?

By Liz Kelly  | October 12, 2009; 10:42 AM ET
Categories:  Celebrities  
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Not happy? Just change your name - recreate a persona and boom - instant happiness. Except it doesn't work.

At least Madonna with all her re-inventions of style was the same person. Of course, now she is doing the scary "trying to be 20 when I am 50" thing.

Face it, celebs are messed up.

Posted by: epjd | October 12, 2009 10:59 AM | Report abuse

To have the presence of mind to end a topic you have decided to cover and print with "who cares" is all we need to know about what sort of brain quality is at work here. If it weren't for a country full of racists, how would you earn your meal ticket?

Posted by: Ede8 | October 12, 2009 11:08 AM | Report abuse

Is this clever new press for her movie adaptation (and tie-in single) of "Copacabana"?

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | October 12, 2009 11:11 AM | Report abuse

Bawlmer - We were on the same page. When I saw "Who is Lola?" My first thought was, a showgirl, next question.

J.Lo/Lola has been off the radar for a LOOOONG time - had to do something to get people talking about her again. So, she copied Beyonce.

Posted by: suzannepdc | October 12, 2009 11:25 AM | Report abuse

GAH!!! Is there some way to keep that horror from auto-playing? I'm fortunate I have an office with a door, but still.

Second, Liz, you forgot a mediocre movie with Richard Gere. And wasn't there the obligatory "urban" clothing line in there somewhere?

Posted by: northgs | October 12, 2009 11:33 AM | Report abuse

Another with "Copacabana" playing in her brain now!

Posted by: mouse4 | October 12, 2009 11:41 AM | Report abuse

She won't be as amazing as Lola Heatherton.

Posted by: mdreader01 | October 12, 2009 12:20 PM | Report abuse

And an abysmal movie with Jim Caviezel who should have known better...and now I have Barry Manilow singing in my head. Thanks.

Posted by: Beach_Girl | October 12, 2009 12:28 PM | Report abuse

Could be worse. She could have adopted an alter ego named Gilligan.

Posted by: dablues1 | October 12, 2009 1:21 PM | Report abuse

I'm confused. I thought JLo was her alter ego or was it Jenny from the Block. Oh, but wait, this is the woman who dated P. Diddy, Puff Daddy or whatever his name is or will be. It all sounds like mulit-personality disorder to me.

Posted by: changling | October 12, 2009 1:57 PM | Report abuse

Am I the only one who bypassed "copacabana" for the Kinks... "walks like a woman and talks like a man"? Seems appropriate somehow. L-O-L-A Lola.

Posted by: anonlurker | October 12, 2009 2:34 PM | Report abuse

Queen Latifah seems to have done well with her Big Band style recordings under her birth-name, Dana Owens.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | October 12, 2009 6:33 PM | Report abuse

"I'm confused. I thought JLo was her alter ego or was it Jenny from the Block. Oh, but wait, this is the woman who dated P. Diddy, Puff Daddy or whatever his name is or will be. It all sounds like mulit-personality disorder to me."
LOL! I was going to post something similar to this.

Posted by: liledjen4901 | October 12, 2009 9:16 PM | Report abuse

I met her in a club down in old soho
Where you drink champagne and it tastes just like cherry-cola
C-o-l-a cola
She walked up to me and she asked me to dance
I asked her her name and in a dark brown voice she said lola
L-o-l-a lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola

Well Im not the worlds most physical guy
But when she squeezed me tight she nearly broke my spine
Oh my lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
Well Im not dumb but I cant understand
Why she walked like a woman and talked like a man
Oh my lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola

Well we drank champagne and danced all night
Under electric candlelight
She picked me up and sat me on her knee
And said dear boy wont you come home with me
Well Im not the worlds most passionate guy
But when I looked in her eyes well I almost fell for my lola
Lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
Lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola

I pushed her away
I walked to the door
I fell to the floor
I got down on my knees
Then I looked at her and she at me

Well thats the way that I want it to stay
And I always want it to be that way for my lola
Lo-lo-lo-lo lola
Girls will be boys and boys will be girls
Its a mixed up muddled up shook up world except for lola
Lo-lo-lo-lo lola

Well I left home just a week before
And Id never ever kissed a woman before
But lola smiled and took me by the hand
And said dear boy Im gonna make you a man

Well Im not the worlds most masculine man
But I know what I am and Im glad Im a man
And so is lola
Lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola
Lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola lo-lo-lo-lo lola

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | October 12, 2009 11:57 PM | Report abuse

What a fuss, - over nothing. Here, "alter ego" is referring to various aspects that are part of the same person. If you act differently around certain people: e.g. your grandparents, or boss, or your children, - you have them too. Beyonce likes talking about alter egos, but she didn't invent the ideas.

Most people have or had "nicknames". Sometimes they come about in special relationships. Two of Jennifer's nicknames share the same syllable in her last name (LO-pez). In the Late 1990s, "J.Lo" was a nickname from some of her music fans. And before that - Marc Anthony nicknamed her "Lola" which, in Spanish, means "strong woman". He wrote a message for her at the end of the liner notes of his self-titled English album (1999): "Lola : Thanks for the times. You made for a great album. I love you."

Posted by: Claravista | October 13, 2009 5:11 AM | Report abuse

Claravista is right. Lola has been Marc Anthony's nickname for La Lopez for many years. It's a pretty well known tidbit by those who follow Latin show business. One of his big salsa hits from shortly after he broke up with wife Dayanara had a tag at the end saying "I love you Lola."

Posted by: kawena | October 13, 2009 3:56 PM | Report abuse

Prince has had persona/ae before any of these people were born.

He's had Nikki, Camille, Alexander Nevermine, Joey Coco, Gemini, Christopher Tracy, and Jamie Starr.

Posted by: bs2004 | October 14, 2009 3:57 PM | Report abuse

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