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Posted at 8:24 AM ET, 12/ 3/2009

Beyonce tops Grammy noms; Alleged Tiger Woods mistress to speak out today

By Liz Kelly
Thursday

Headlines: Taylor Swift, Beyonce top Grammy nominations... Tiger Beat: Gloria Allred to hold 11:30 a.m. ET news conference re: Rachel Uchitel... British PM Gordon Brown mistakes Reese Witherspoon for Renee Zellweger... Natalie Portman says she didn't touch pot until her 20s... Rupert Everett warns gay actors to stay in the closet... "Family Ties" mom Meredith Baxter must've missed that bulletin... Michael Lohan deposed in TLC's suit vs. Jon Gosselin... Will Smith puts brakes on "Hancock" sequel... Alana Stewart claims to speak to dead Farrah Fawcett in psychic TV special.

Crime Watch: Alleged celebrity burglars plead not guilty... Roman Polanski set to begin house arrest Friday... Restraining order against Verne Troyer dropped.

Pix: George Clooney girlfriend Elisabetta Canalis thongs it up for magazine cover (NSFW)... Lady Gaga glams up for Elle cover... David Duchovny and Tea Leoni step out together... Helen Hunt, bikini -- you decide.

Video: James Lipton loans out his beard in an oddball set of PSAs...

Rumor Mill: Tiger Beat, Rumor Mill Edition: Elin Nordegren getting prenup rewrite, payoff?; supposed third woman surfaces.

Chat Day! At 2 p.m. ET, park yourself behind the keyboard for this week's Celebritology Live chat. Then, depending on your level of commitment, stick around for the "Lost" Hour at 3 p.m. ET -- this week with special guest Paul Scheer, the actor/comedian heading up this year's "Lost" ARG, damoncarltonandapolarbear.com.

By Liz Kelly  | December 3, 2009; 8:24 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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Next: Twits: Rainn Wilson, Paula Abdul, Nick Hogan

Comments

I never heard of some of these "celebs", I have less than zero interest in the rest.

Posted by: jezebel3 | December 3, 2009 8:42 AM | Report abuse

Mrs. Woods is my favorite wronged wife! No standing by his side, looking grim and resigned. No embarassment for her. No public humiliation!

Instead, she beats him up with his own golf club (ha ha - the clubs that made him so rich, etc.) AND she calls in lawyers to re-draft the prenup and make him pay for his cheating.

TEAM ELIN!!

Posted by: Amelia5 | December 3, 2009 8:42 AM | Report abuse

"Taylor Swift, Beyonce top Grammy nominations..." and so Kanye begins his warmups.


"British PM Gordon Brown mistakes Reese Witherspoon for Renee Zellweger." To which representatives for both women said, "I thought the English President was Tony Blair?"


Farrah's message from beyond: "Paradise? Meh."


Helen Hunt's no Helen Mirren.

Posted by: byoolin1 | December 3, 2009 8:42 AM | Report abuse

Other surprises from beyond the grave, as revealed by Farrah Fawcett to Alana Stewart:

* There's only Basic cable here.

* You see a lot of people you were *sure* were going to go to the 'other place' when they died.

* I laughed so hard when Ryan hit on Tatum at my funeral.

* Turns out George Carlin was right - the guy we think of as God is really the western marketing manager.

* Houdini never shows up for those midnight Hallowe'en seances to talk to him because he hosts a big show here for the kids that night. Try him on Thursdays between 1 and 3.

Posted by: byoolin1 | December 3, 2009 8:56 AM | Report abuse

I admire Renee for not changing her name to look better on marquees (do we still have those?) Otherwise, it's Reese! Reese! Reese!

Posted by: reddragon1 | December 3, 2009 8:59 AM | Report abuse

This from the Will Smith item regarding his busy family life:

"It's like the Israeli peace process times a thousand how tough it is to resolve. I think it'll happen though. We just have to kind of get in the same room for some consistency."

Seriously Will? You're going to compare your cush closeted Hollywood lifestyle of ease and luxury to the Israeli conflict??Only someone without an effing clue to the history and politics of the holy land would make, what is quite frankly, the dumbest thing anyone has ever said in the history of everything.

Posted by: jelo97 | December 3, 2009 9:25 AM | Report abuse

Rupert, you've been in 500 movies and TV shows in the last 20 years, so yeah I can see how your career has been limited.


And on that note, if Meredith Baxter had come out earlier, maybe she could've had a career that wasn't entirely based on Lifetime movies.


I think Helen Hunt looks pretty good in that bikini, especially since she is apparently 80 years old.


A third woman for Tiger? You know, you can only claim a mulligan on one. (I promise to stop the bad golf jokes at some point.)

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 3, 2009 9:27 AM | Report abuse

Poor Rupert Everett, he just doesn't realize that people don't wanna hire Rupert Everett because he's gay, they just don't wanna hire the plastic mannequin that's replaced him.

Posted by: wadejg | December 3, 2009 9:31 AM | Report abuse

If Meredith Baxter (who I will always think of as Meredith Baxter Birney) had come out about 20 years ago, it could have made for a Very, Very Special Episode. And you thought it was a big deal when Skippy found out he was adopted!

Posted by: Wikijen | December 3, 2009 9:47 AM | Report abuse

Beyoncé. Beyoncé?! Further proof that songs need only four words repeated endlessly to prompt serious award consideration. How far we've fallen.

Someone should also tell Rupert Everett that making movies with Madonna didn't exactly light his career on fire either.

Helen Hunt. Sigh. Had a crush on her for years, ever since she was Tony Roberts' daughter on "The Love Boat." But then "Mad About You" went off the rails mid-run and so did I. As for the bikini, let's just say my memories of "Swiss Family Robinson" are done for now, too. OUT.

Meredith Baxter is gay? What would Sada Thompson and James Broderick say (if they weren't both dead, that is)? What a "Family"! If you tell me next that Kristy McNichol is gay too, all memories of my adolescence (see also Helen Hunt, above) will be ruined.

Oh, and Meredith? You and your friend Martina Navratilova should stay out of the sun. Little free advice there for you, Leather Tuscadero.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | December 3, 2009 10:04 AM | Report abuse

Bridget Loves Bernice!

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | December 3, 2009 10:07 AM | Report abuse

td
To quote a great wit, reports of Sada Thompson's death have been greatly exaggerated.

Re Helen Hunt and Meredith Baxter looking old: How ironic, all the snarking here re celebs who get too much plastic surgery, then when some (apparently) don't, they get trashed too. Ya can't win, sez I.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 3, 2009 10:12 AM | Report abuse

Tiger - the less said, the better. Nothing good ever comes from a celebrity opening his mouth following a stupidity. Let the other women speak, you keep it to yourself. Discretion is the better part of valor when you've been stupid.

Although, you & Elin could wear the shirts: "I'm Stupid" and "I'm with Stupid".

Posted by: mat00 | December 3, 2009 10:18 AM | Report abuse

Tiger ain't exactly the choir-boy his image-makers tried to convince he was:
http://www.esquire.com/features/the-game/tiger-woods-life-story-1997

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 3, 2009 10:31 AM | Report abuse

From the Tiger post: "Nike believed in him; we believed in him. We deserve to know why it was so easy for him to let us down."

Are you serious!?!? We believed in him? He let us down? We deserve to know?

What in the WORLD are you talking about, Liz? Geez, just because the guy is shilling razors doesn't mean I "believe" in him. (Wait, if Nike believed in him, then that means I should too!) Seriously, this to me is a very scary comment. The guy hits a tiny object around a yard; that does not make him a role model. Do people really think that they KNOW someone just because they've seen his picture a lot!?!? And that that person is LEADING them somehow!?

Let us down!?? Huh!?!?

Posted by: Georgetown1 | December 3, 2009 10:47 AM | Report abuse

Somehow, I am amazingly unsurprised that Meredith Baxter is gay. Not that she seemed particularly butch, but it's just such a non-story to me. I did love her son's reaction "Glad you finally figured it out mom."

Good luck getting Tiger to agree to sign the new pre-nup. He might feel guilty, but he still has legal advisers.

Please note Alana Stewart did not claim to contact Michael Jackson. And we know why.

Posted by: epjd | December 3, 2009 10:50 AM | Report abuse

Reese Witherspoon, Renee Zellweger. Well, they both have first names that start with 'R'and have unusual last names. I can see getting that mixed up. Besides, one blonde, or another, how can you tell them apart?

I just had to share this: From an article in today's WaPo, regarding Ms Salahi and her supposedly being a Redskins cheerleader, longtime member/choreographer Olecheck said, "she was unnerved by the episode." (when Salahi showed up for a practice with the RHofDC film crew) "It takes a lot of time and heart and practice to be a Redskins cheerleader," she said. "It's really a privilege to wear the burgundy and gold. So I'm resentful. . . . For her to get out there and think she can just shake her pompoms is upsetting."

http://www.washingtonpost.com/wp-dyn/content/article/2009/12/02/AR2009120203781.html?hpid%3Dartslot&sub=AR

Posted by: agog1 | December 3, 2009 10:51 AM | Report abuse

Sada Thompson is alive?! Wow. She seemed like she was at least 60 back when "Family" was on the air but in reality she was . . . my current age. Huh.

You know, upon some reflection, she really DID look quite the spring chicken back then. My mistake. Carry on.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | December 3, 2009 11:12 AM | Report abuse

I had to look at the pics of Clooney's girlfriend a second (and third) time just to get the image of Helen Hunt in a bikini out of my head. Dear lord, I just wonder if Helen Hunt is the portrait, who is Dorian Gray?

Posted by: MStreet1 | December 3, 2009 11:16 AM | Report abuse

British PM Gordon Brown mistakes Reese Witherspoon for Renee Zellweger...

PM Gordon Brown: "I was really impressed with your proper British accent in 'Bridget Jones Diary.'"

Reese Witherspoon: "So where's Camilla?"
===========
"Roman Polanski set to begin house arrest Friday... Restraining order against Verne Troyer dropped."
- It's amazing that the world keeps spinning while it readjusts its priorities.

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 3, 2009 11:21 AM | Report abuse

Tiger Woods, man...I wish I could jump on the snark wagon, but to me it just seems sad.

"George Clooney girlfriend Elisabetta Canalis thongs it up for magazine cover (NSFW)"..."George Clooney arrives at Monday night's Los Angeles premiere of 'Up in the Air' with girlfriend Elisabetta Canalis (left) and his mother, Nina Warren. (Reuters)" And I though I had an awkward Thanksgiving weekend.

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | December 3, 2009 11:28 AM | Report abuse

How ironic, all the snarking here re celebs who get too much plastic surgery, then when some (apparently) don't, they get trashed too.
Posted by: Nosy_Parker
**********

Nosy, the obvious solution here is to just upload Photoshop directly into our brains. "Cranial Retouching: You'll Never Have To Cope With Reality Again!"

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | December 3, 2009 11:42 AM | Report abuse

epjd- I had a similar reaction. When I read about the news I think I was surprised because I thought she was out already.

Posted by: TigerLily81 | December 3, 2009 11:48 AM | Report abuse

Okay, people, whoever has been swinging the Ugly Stick, please put it away for a day or two.

Meredith Baxter and Helen Hunt.....ARGGGG!!!

I'm not an advocate of plastic surgery, but when Ms Snatchquatch and I looked at the pictures this morning, we agreed that Meredith Baxter should be an exception to the "No plastic surgery rule." And Helen Hunt looks terrible.

BTW, Ms. Snatchquatch told me this morning that she has had sex with Tiger Woods. I guess Tiger is out to beat Bill Clinton's record.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 3, 2009 12:42 PM | Report abuse

How could anyone mistake Reese for Renee? Reese eats and is cute.

Good for Helen Hunt. A naturel actresses are an endangered species.

Did someone photoshop Natalie Portman's head onto a child's body? That's a weird-looking photo.

Raise your hand if you're really tired of people seeking their 15 minutes of fame by any means necessary (I'm looking at you, Tiger Woods' mistress(es)).

Posted by: Californian11 | December 3, 2009 12:42 PM | Report abuse

If "Real Housewives of D.C." doesn't work out for Michaele Salahi, she could always check with Octomom's OB/GYN re getting 9 embryos implanted.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 3, 2009 3:17 PM | Report abuse

OMG Nosy! That WOULD be the apocalypse ... and the cherry on the sundae would be if she hooked up with Jon Gosselin.

Posted by: Californian11 | December 3, 2009 4:04 PM | Report abuse

Ok, I confess - I hooked up w. Tiger while he was in town over the 4th of July.

Now, can I have my check too?

(is this all it takes?)


To paraphrase my very wise mom, the best way to keep yourself out of trouble is keep your legs crossed.

Posted by: anonymouslurker | December 3, 2009 4:37 PM | Report abuse

Or your pants zipped.

Posted by: Californian11 | December 3, 2009 5:19 PM | Report abuse

Monica Lewinsky would also advise you to your mouth shut.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 3, 2009 5:42 PM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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