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Posted at 7:00 AM ET, 12/11/2009

Maryland judge limits Jon Gosselin media appearances

By Jen Chaney
Friday

Headlines: Maryland judge rules in favor of curbing Jon Gosselin's media appearances... Lawyers for Roman Polanski and his victim ask court to drop sexual misconduct charge... "Flight of the Conchords" officially over; fingers crossed that both the hiphopopotamus and the rhymenoceros will be taken in by a nice, preferably funky zoo... Angelina Jolie expresses concern about President Obama's approach to Darfur... Miley Cyrus song pulled from Grammy contention... "Girl Next Door" Kendra Wilkinson and husband/pro footballer Hank Baskett welcome baby boy.

Tiger beat: Alleged mistress Rachel Uchitel sought for Playboy spread... Owner of escort service says Tiger Woods was a client... Woods quitting golf to save his marriage?

Rumor Mill: Jessica Simpson dating Billy Corgan, allegedly taking it slow; Molly Sims and Aaron Eckhart have already split.

By Jen Chaney  | December 11, 2009; 7:00 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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Next: Tiger dumped by Accenture; Angelina Jolie's Facebook pals

Comments

A topic discussed here before:

"Britain, Long a Libel Mecca, Reviews Laws":
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/11/world/europe/11libel.html?hp

In relevant part: "...English libel law is the opposite of America’s in many ways. In the United States, the plaintiff, or accuser, must prove that the statement in question was false; public officials must also prove that it was made maliciously, with “reckless disregard” for the truth. / In England (Scotland has its own system), the burden of proof rests on the defendant, whose statements are presumed false and who has to establish that they are true... / The justice secretary, Jack Straw, said recently that he was alarmed about “libel tourism.” And in the House of Commons, a committee has listened to a parade of witnesses denounce the current law as perverse, unfair, prohibitively expensive, contemptuous of free speech and an anachronism in an age when access to articles on foreign Web sites can be obtained anywhere..."

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 9:30 AM | Report abuse

The problem with staying with Tiger for Elin must: would she have married him in the first place if she knew that he paid for sex, had mulitple sex partners simultaneously, picked up strangers in bars for sex, picked up waitresses in various restaurants, etc. etc. etc?

Everyone has stuff in their past - but he had so, so much going on - would she have wanted to marry him if she'd known about it? Or maybe she did and married him anyway.

But that's our problem with all it - reconciling the Tiger image that was projected - cool, in control, tough - with his pathetic having to pay for sex and pay hush money to all these women. It sounds like the life of a loser. It's sad.

Posted by: Amelia5 | December 11, 2009 9:34 AM | Report abuse

Thank-you Maryland judge. Now will you please submit your ruling on the curtailing of media appearances by Heincer, Octomom, and any of the Real Housewives?

I don't think it is golf that Tiger needs to quit to save his marriage.

Welcome to the world, baby Hank.

Posted by: hodie | December 11, 2009 9:36 AM | Report abuse

Woo hoo for judges! Now where are the breach of contract lawsuits against Heidi and Spencer? Come on, somebody sue them! For the love of all that is holy, sue them!

Posted by: DCCubefarm | December 11, 2009 9:42 AM | Report abuse

Wow. I would never have expected to see a judge's decision that read in its entirety, "Shut up, Jon. Just shut the f*** up."

------
Final scene of "Flight of the Conchords", first draft -

MURRAY: Alright, then. [MURRAY pulls out a notepad and paper.] Murray, present. Bret - Bret. Bret? [MURRAY looks up, does not see Bret.]

MURRAY: Jemaine. Jemaine? [MURRAY looks up, does not see Jemaine.]

MURRAY: Bugger.

-------

It's alright, Miley Cyrus: just breathe.


"Woods quitting golf to save his marriage?" Geez, that's like bombing Iraq to get at bin Laden.


"Jessica Simpson dating Billy Corgan, allegedly taking it slow." You misunderstand, Liz Kelly - someone asked Billy who he was dating and he said, "I'm taking *out* Slow" and gestured in JSimp's direction.

Posted by: byoolin1 | December 11, 2009 9:43 AM | Report abuse

Re: the Maryland judge - what hodie said.

Friday love to Alexa Ray Joel.

Posted by: jaybbub | December 11, 2009 9:53 AM | Report abuse

Lets hear it for judicial activism!


I'm pretty sure that if Molly Sims was interested in me, you'd know about it. Privacy be darned.

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 11, 2009 9:53 AM | Report abuse

Do we have an address for thank-you notes to the Maryland judge? Maybe we can all chip in for a nice bouquet?

Tiger catting around in cathouses... This has gone from sleazy to pathetic.

Posted by: northgs | December 11, 2009 9:59 AM | Report abuse

Any word from LTL lately re the Little Lurker?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 10:02 AM | Report abuse

Nosy, no word yet. But thanks to Judge Mason in Montgomery County, it's safe to come out.

Posted by: epjd | December 11, 2009 10:27 AM | Report abuse

Nosy, Jack Straw might have my favorite name for any British minister ever. The only better one would be John Bull. I am presuming that in Scotland, libel cases are decided by a Caber Toss.

I give up. If Polanski's vicitm wants this to just go away, enough already. At least American newscasters won't be reporting that he is wanted for "having sex" with a teenager.

The Prime Minister of Brangelina upset with Obama's approach to Darfur. Does that guy ever stay home? First China & Japan, then Oslo, now Darfur. I didn't know it had an airport.

Sounds like Tiger may have an addiction prob. If so, it's not so incredible Elin didn't know. Addicts specialize in covering up.

Posted by: reddragon1 | December 11, 2009 10:28 AM | Report abuse

Thanks Nosy- excellent link. Those crazy tea-sippin' scone-munchers.

""Jon & Kate Plus Eight" began as a charming series about a couple raising eight youngsters, but morphed into two parents being really mad at each other." I...that's just about perfect, right there. In twenty years, when someone wonders aloud who this "Jon" is that's living on their uncle's couch, this needs to be the header on the Wikipedia page they look up.

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | December 11, 2009 10:34 AM | Report abuse

“We’ve noticed the less we say about the future of the show, the more people want to talk about it, so in an effort to reverse this trend we are today announcing that we won’t be returning for a 3rd season."

Unfortunately, this quote is about Flight of the Conchords. However, I would not be sad to hear a variation of it uttered by any number of people. Let's start with Lindsay Lohan...


"Jessica Simpson dating Billy Corgan, allegedly taking it slow"

I guess after 40, 'the resolute urgency of now' is not so important.

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 11, 2009 10:39 AM | Report abuse

RIP, Gene Berry (Bat Masterson.)

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 11, 2009 10:45 AM | Report abuse

Re: The Jon GoAway story, does Dan Morse, Washington Post Staff Writer have a little attitude regarding our father of eight? To wit: "In August, he played host to something called Wet Republic at the MGM Grand Hotel in Vegas."

He "played host" to "something"? How about "emceed an event" or "...pool party"? Granted, Jon wasn't exactly welcoming President Obama to the Nobel ceremonies. But still; come on.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | December 11, 2009 10:46 AM | Report abuse

Ahhhhhh.

There IS justice in this world.

See ya, Jon.

Oyez, oyez,

Curmudgeon

Posted by: bmschumacher | December 11, 2009 10:47 AM | Report abuse

I guess after 40, 'the resolute urgency of now' is not so important.

Posted by: mdreader01

-------------------------------------------

It takes awhile for those impotence drugs to kick in. I would have "V****" instead of "impotence," but that is a banned word on this forum, probably because of spammers.

By the time it takes Jessica Simpson to recognize "the resolute urgency of now," it's then.

I sure hope that Hank Basket IV likes suckling on silicone. No, Dorkus, you can't be Hank Basket IV. Now that there are two Hanks under the same roof, will the elder one be addressed as Mister Hanky?

From the article: "Extra says their sources say Uchitel "wants a lot of money" and has yet to reach a deal with [Playboy] magazine..." So it was about money all along, eh, Rachel? Quoting Santa Clause: "Ho! Ho! Ho!"

The judge in the Jon Gosselin-Discovery case did not go far enough. he should have orderd the bailiff to take off his socks and stuff them in Jon's mouth.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 11, 2009 10:51 AM | Report abuse

Aw come on Sas, what's with the preemptive hating?

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 11, 2009 10:59 AM | Report abuse

Maryland judge rules in favor of curbing Jon Gosselin's media appearances.

Maybe he could do something to shut down the Salahis, too. Please?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 10:59 AM | Report abuse

Aw come on Sas, what's with the preemptive hating?

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | December 11, 2009 10:59 AM

-------------------------------------------
Dorkus, you don't want to suckle that silicone. It tastes terrible. ;-)>

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 11, 2009 11:21 AM | Report abuse

I guess after 40, 'the resolute urgency of now' is not so important.

Posted by: mdreader01

-------------------------------------------

It takes awhile for those impotence drugs to kick in....

By the time it takes Jessica Simpson to recognize "the resolute urgency of now," it's then.

============
Sas, I was refering to the 42 year old Corgan, for whom, "the resolute urgency of now" will involve not impotence medication, but I suspect incontinence medication at some point in the near future.

As for Jessica, alas, she has never penned a stirring lyric for me to snark on. I've got nothing.

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 11, 2009 11:59 AM | Report abuse

Sas,

And you would know this, how?

Oyez,

Curmudgeon

Posted by: bmschumacher | December 11, 2009 12:00 PM | Report abuse

"Molly Sims and Aaron Eckhart have already split."

- They split before I knew they were together. Aaron appears to be a serial splitter. Remind me, when did he date Jennifer Aniston?


"Alleged mistress Rachel Uchitel sought for Playboy spread..."

- I'm not up on my Playboy condiments. Is this "Playboy spread" more like margerine, Dijon mustard or is it some foul thing like Vegemite?

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 11, 2009 12:05 PM | Report abuse

As for Jessica, alas, she has never penned a stirring lyric for me to snark on. I've got nothing.

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 11, 2009 11:59 AM

-------------------------------------------
My guess is that if you handed a pen to Jessica Simpson, she wouldn't know what to do with it.

*****************************************


Sas,

And you would know this [silicone tastes terrible], how?

Oyez,

Curmudgeon

---------------------------------------

It involves an old girlfriend I once had, who suddenly left me. We were in the midst of passion, when I bit her on the breast. She farted at me and flew out the window. I never saw her again.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | December 11, 2009 12:13 PM | Report abuse

"Alleged mistress Rachel Uchitel sought for Playboy spread..."

- I'm not up on my Playboy condiments. Is this "Playboy spread" more like margerine, Dijon mustard or is it some foul thing like Vegemite?

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 11, 2009 12:05 PM


md,

The Playboy spread is probably more like "I Can't Believe It's Not Butter".

Posted by: bmschumacher | December 11, 2009 12:15 PM | Report abuse

"Playboy spread" is accepted by the Lizzicon as correct terminology for the output when a woman agrees to do Playboy. And vice versa.

Posted by: reddragon1 | December 11, 2009 12:19 PM | Report abuse

"Alleged mistress Rachel Uchitel sought for Playboy spread..."

mdreader
- I'm not up on my Playboy condiments. Is this "Playboy spread" more like margerine, Dijon mustard or is it some foul thing like Vegemite?


I was thinking maybe more like Nutella.


md,

The Playboy spread is probably more like

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 12:25 PM | Report abuse

Oops! Post should've read:

"Alleged mistress Rachel Uchitel sought for Playboy spread..."

mdreader
- I'm not up on my Playboy condiments. Is this "Playboy spread" more like margerine, Dijon mustard or is it some foul thing like Vegemite?


I was thinking maybe more like Nutella.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 12:31 PM | Report abuse

Liz, you seem to have missed the news that Alec Baldwin is the new official announcer of the New York Philharmonic radio broadcasts:
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/12/13/arts/music/13baldwin.html?hp

Perhaps Lizards can suggest some (in-)appropriate things for Alec to say.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 12:35 PM | Report abuse

Nosey,

What? Like an aside wondering why all harpists are fat ladies?

Oyez (today's word),

Curmudgeon

Posted by: bmschumacher | December 11, 2009 12:40 PM | Report abuse

mudge
What? Like an aside wondering why all harpists are fat ladies?

I was thinking more in terms of some of the dialogue from his past works, like "Glengarry Glen Ross" or "Streetcar Named Desire," not to mention the infamous message he left for daughter Ireland on the answering machine.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 12:49 PM | Report abuse

Exactly, hodie. *Golf* wasn't the problem.

It'll be interesting to see, in future years, if the millions of children who breast-fed from silicone-implanted women, develop health problems as a result of ingesting who knows what.

Posted by: Californian11 | December 11, 2009 1:16 PM | Report abuse

Apparently Micelle Duggar had an emergency C-section...the baby girl is named Josie Brooklyn and weighs 1 pound 6 ounces. She's in ICU for extended care, but is reported to be stable. Mrs. Duggar is reported to be resting comfortably.

Posted by: VaLGaL | December 11, 2009 1:19 PM | Report abuse

It involves an old girlfriend I once had, who suddenly left me. We were in the midst of passion, when I bit her on the breast. She farted at me and flew out the window. I never saw her again.
Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot

Sas, I'm glad now you have Mrs Snatchquatch (I hope I spelled that right) and no longer have no need for your airheaded girlfriends and their inflated ideals.

Speedy recovery to Mrs Duggar and baby Josie. I like the first name. Middle name seems odd for a Duggar. The Duggars are crazy but I wish them no ill-will as they are nice people. I was afraid with recent reports of her hospitalization with acute cholecystitis, that something like this would occur. It is dangerous during pregnancy. I hope this is a wake up call and they don't do something stupid like go for twenty because it is a nice round number. Please let's quit while you're ahead, Duggars.

Posted by: hodie | December 11, 2009 2:09 PM | Report abuse

"Alleged mistress Rachel Uchitel sought for Playboy spread..."

- I'm not up on my Playboy condiments. Is this "Playboy spread" more like margerine, Dijon mustard or is it some foul thing like Vegemite?

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 11, 2009 12:05 PM

Can we please not bring up a fermented yeast product in conjunction with "Playboy spreads"?

Posted by: northgs | December 11, 2009 2:24 PM | Report abuse

Alec Baldwin is the new official announcer of the New York Philharmonic radio broadcasts:

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 12:35 PM
=====================
Baldwin: And tonight we have a special performance of music from English composer Edmund Rubbra, and the father of the French organ school, Jehan Titelouze. It may seem unusual to the casual listener to pair 20th century English classical music with 16th century organ polyphony, however, I think you will be very delighted with this Rubbra-Titelouze combination.

This is Alex Baldwin, inviting you to enjoy the New York Philharmonic's presentation of music by Rubbra and Titelouze.

Posted by: mdreader01 | December 11, 2009 2:50 PM | Report abuse

northgs, as disgusting as it is, I think it's probably TOTALLY APPROPRIATE to bring up fermented yeast products in conjunction with Playboy Spreads.

Tiger tales getting sleazier and sleazier. Just yuck. I was reading some sportswriter yesterday that said he once said (and Tiger agreed) that it was better to think of him as the son of an ex-military officer than a Stanford Grad. Sounds like he nailed it. The sportswriter, that is.

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | December 11, 2009 2:54 PM | Report abuse

cat, Tiger only attended Stanford for two years. And since you're a Californian, you'd know that it's a school for privileged children.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 3:09 PM | Report abuse

nosy, you sound as though you believe being privileged makes one morally bankrupt. I'm sure not everyone from Stanford is a cheating lech. I certainly hope not b/c it is on the short list for my son's college choices.

Posted by: hodie | December 11, 2009 3:23 PM | Report abuse

Hodie, as long as your son doesn't aspire to be the next Tiger Woods (or John McEnroe, who also went to Stanford for a bit). OTOH, Chelsea Clinton and her fiancé both graduated from Stanford.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 3:32 PM | Report abuse

nosy, my son does not golf so maybe he's safe. LOL. But he is very cute and much admired by the ladies so let's hope Mr. Hodie and I have knocked enough sense into him over the years. His younger brother on the other hand, I do worry about! Too cool for his own good.

Posted by: hodie | December 11, 2009 4:12 PM | Report abuse

Erm, Nosy, BOTH of my parents went to Stanford, and my Dad also for grad school.

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | December 11, 2009 4:38 PM | Report abuse

cat, at least it wasn't the University of Spoiled Children.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 4:44 PM | Report abuse

Apologies, cat. Looks like I really stepped in **it.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | December 11, 2009 10:40 PM | Report abuse

Yeah, yeah, let's trash colleges, whatever. Much more importantly: The Explainer answers our questions about breast-feeding and implants.

http://www.slate.com/id/2238096/

Posted by: Bawlmer51 | December 12, 2009 10:14 AM | Report abuse

Thank you very much,Men's Buffalo SabresI have read it now.

Posted by: xinlang071101 | December 13, 2009 4:02 AM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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