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Posted at 8:22 AM ET, 01/11/2010

Tom Cruise voted world's sexiest short man; Fergie and Josh Duhamel renew vows

By Liz Kelly
Monday

Headlines: Tom Cruise voted world's sexiest short man... Gisele Bundchen is highest paid supermodel... NBC officially cancels Jay Leno's prime-time show... Artie Lange released from hospital... Erstwhile hobbit Elijah Wood hosts "Lord of the Wings" eating contest... Fergie and Josh Duhamel renew wedding vows... Michael Bublé engaged... Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger splits from boyfriend... Liza Minnelli to get new hip.

Crime Watch: Prosecutors plan to seek indictment of Michael Jackson doctor Conrad Murray... Jackson's death certificate amendment (implicating another person in the death) posted online... Police investigating Lindsay Lohan's driver in paparazzo car incident.

Rumor Mill: Jon Gosselin dating new 25-year-old girlfriend... Dennis Hopper losing battle with cancer?... Derek Jeter and Minka Kelly engaged... Did Joe Francis mastermind Tila Tequila-Casey Johnson engagement?... Is Angelina Jolie really a natural blonde?

Pix: Miley Cyrus sports shredded chic... Katy Perry shows off engagement ring.

Video: Liam Neeson leads new "A-Team"...

More: Lindsay Lohan's child-trafficking documentary.

By Liz Kelly  | January 11, 2010; 8:22 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
Save & Share:  Send E-mail   Facebook   Twitter   Digg   Yahoo Buzz   Del.icio.us   StumbleUpon   Technorati   Google Buzz   Previous: Is death the new sex tape?
Next: Taylor Lautner is alive

Comments

I'm not sure Angelina Jolie is a natural anything.

Posted by: yellojkt | January 11, 2010 8:54 AM | Report abuse

"Jon Gosselin dating new 25-year-old girlfriend... "

Ugh. Liz, is your grasp of the English language and proper grammar really that bad? How about "Gosselin has a new girlfriend" or "Gosselin dating 25-year-old woman"?

I'll never understand why a derrivative column with no actual reporting is so hard for you to write and write properly, Liz.

P.S. Why does the "name my kid" contest start?

Posted by: njacobs | January 11, 2010 9:17 AM | Report abuse

"Tom Cruise voted world's sexiest short man." That's only slightly less damned-with-faint-praise than being called "Miss Congeniality."


"Gisele Bundchen is highest paid supermodel." She's happy, especially since her husband Tom Brady now has _all kinds of time_ to plan a party to celebrate it.


I admit defeat: no mere snarky wisecrack could possibly be more amusing than just watching NBC's handling of the whole Jay thing. It's like a chimp on PCP.

Posted by: byoolin1 | January 11, 2010 9:23 AM | Report abuse

Proofreading note, njacobs: There's only one 'r' in 'derivative.'

P.S.: Did you really mean to ask "why" in your P.S., or would "when" have been the better word?

Posted by: byoolin1 | January 11, 2010 9:32 AM | Report abuse

I don't know if it was the weekend or the cold weather but today was a day to misread things. I read, "Tom Cruise voted world's shortest man," but I knew that couldn't be true because Vern Troyer already leads the short list.

Then I read "Fergie and Josh Deschanel renew wedding vows," which made me think of Zoe Deschanel, which made me want to barf. (Oddly, Emily does not have this effect.)

Then I read about Pussycat Doll Nicole Schwarzenegger, and I knew it was time to stop and start over.

Why does it seem like Jon dating a 25-year-old is so much skeevier than Michael Buble and his squeeze, who are way more age-disparate? Could it be that Jon is skeevy all by himself?

I say we should blame Joe Francis. Whether he had anything to do with it or not. In fact, he should be investigated for the Christmas Day fruit-of-the-loom bombing.

I volunteer to check on the Angie thing.

OMG, Miley. Can you say "Trailer Trash?"

Posted by: reddragon1 | January 11, 2010 9:34 AM | Report abuse

Celebritologists-- The Angelina link pops up as having Malware on my computer. Just to be on the safe side, I cancelled out of it.

Posted by: Guest1234 | January 11, 2010 9:51 AM | Report abuse

"Tom Cruise voted world's sexiest short man." Which is a not-so-small insult to little people everywhere.

NBC officially cancels Jay Leno's primetime show. As opposed to letting it die slowly without intervention.

Fergie and Josh Duhamel renew wedding vows. So I guess there was something to that Atlanta stripper story after all?

Reddragon, Jon Gosselin is definitely skeevier than any mere age difference.

Miley, that look is soooo 1989. And Madonna did it better back then, too.

Posted by: northgs | January 11, 2010 9:54 AM | Report abuse

Ah, the ever-popular vow renewal. The countdown begins...

Posted by: jaybbub | January 11, 2010 10:06 AM | Report abuse

Fergie and Josh Duhamel renew wedding vows.

Next up: matching tattoos in five, four, three, two...


Tom Cruise voted world's sexiest short man.

They've GOT to be kidding! Not when there's Ben McKenzie of "Southland" and late of "The O.C." Now THERE's a guy for whom lots of women would be willing to sacrifice high-heels!


Liza Minnelli to get new hip.

I find it easier just to add to the old ones I already have. Please pass the doughnuts!


NBC officially cancels Jay Leno's prime-time show.

Am I the only one here who actually likes Jay (though not necessarily all of his show, but mainly his monologues, news headlines and band)? I think NBC suits placed him in pretty much of a no-win situation.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | January 11, 2010 10:14 AM | Report abuse

jaybbub, clearly our great minds think alike!

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | January 11, 2010 10:15 AM | Report abuse

Tom Cruise voted sexiest short man. Sorry the Scientology rants take away any residual sexiness that remained.

Yep, the Fergie-Josh wedding is so on the rocks.

Involutary manslaughter implies he knew the risks and ignored them. I don't think this "doctor" had a thought about anything beyond the benjamins.

Posted by: epjd | January 11, 2010 10:31 AM | Report abuse

I am having trouble seeing past the "batsh!t" craziness to see anything sexy about Wee Tom.

Erstwhile hobbit Elijah Wood hosts "Lord of the Wings" eating contest. But what about second breakfast?

Why don't the Hollywood couples really admit what is happening and say the first vows didn't take, we want a do-over?

Don't feel bad, reddragon. I read the Liza headline as "Liza gets a new lip". I guess more caffeine and/or bifocals are in order.

Just because Angelina was a blonde at 4, doesn't mean she would be one now. But going brunette from blonde is not so unusual. My mother used to do that, I was an adult before I knew she was really blonde.

Posted by: hodie | January 11, 2010 10:33 AM | Report abuse

"Tom Cruise voted world's sexiest short man."
Gary Coleman demands a recount.

Posted by: MStreet1 | January 11, 2010 10:40 AM | Report abuse

Nosy_Parker, it's an honor!

Posted by: jaybbub | January 11, 2010 10:53 AM | Report abuse

hodie, even after I started over, I read, "Liza Minelli now hip." But I knew THAT was wrong...

Posted by: reddragon1 | January 11, 2010 11:11 AM | Report abuse

MStreet
"Tom Cruise voted world's sexiest short man."
Gary Coleman demands a recount.

Maybe they should have re-measures?


Aw, jaybbub, you're the best, with your weekly "love to" shout-outs.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | January 11, 2010 11:17 AM | Report abuse

re: Liza Minelli
Story says she's getting a knee replacement, not a hip replacement.

Just sayin'

Posted by: dablues1 | January 11, 2010 11:38 AM | Report abuse

dablues, I recall hearing that Liza was born with scoliosis. Doc hodie, wouldn't that condition, if left uncorrected, lead to serious damage to hip or knee joints eventually?

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | January 11, 2010 11:51 AM | Report abuse

[An online BRITISH pole] voted Tom Cruise world's sexiest short man...
-He beat out competition from British TV presenter Richard Hammond. REALLY? Hammond (Top Gear) is infinitely cuter (and funnier, too.)

Michael Bublé announced his engagement. If I were his fianceé, I'd be a little concerned that he's done that before and his love song to me was titled, "I Just Havn't Met You Yet."

It's ok, though. If the Bublé engagement doesn't work out, perhaps some nice Republican Senator would be willing to "Hike the Appalachian Trail" again, this time to visit Luisaina.

Posted by: mdreader01 | January 11, 2010 11:53 AM | Report abuse

"Pussycat Doll Nicole Scherzinger splits from boyfriend" ... Boyfriend!

What does he have to do to get referenced by name?

Win a world championship, or something like that?

Posted by: TonyMostyn | January 11, 2010 12:01 PM | Report abuse

I say we should blame Joe Francis. Whether he had anything to do with it or not. In fact, he should be investigated for the Christmas Day fruit-of-the-loom bombing.

Posted by: reddragon1 | January 11, 2010 9:34 AM
========
Jackson's death certificate amendment (implicating another person in the death) posted online...

In reddragon1's world, that other name would be Joe Francis.

Posted by: mdreader01 | January 11, 2010 12:13 PM | Report abuse

dablues, I recall hearing that Liza was born with scoliosis. Doc hodie, wouldn't that condition, if left uncorrected, lead to serious damage to hip or knee joints eventually?

It could. But I suspect with her dancing career the scoliosis was not that serious and the dancing was the joint-wearing culprit.

Posted by: hodie | January 11, 2010 12:20 PM | Report abuse

"Tom Cruise voted world's sexiest short man.

They've GOT to be kidding! Not when there's Ben McKenzie of "Southland" and late of "The O.C." Now THERE's a guy for whom lots of women would be willing to sacrifice high-heels!"

Amen Nosy!!

Posted by: Vienna8425 | January 11, 2010 12:57 PM | Report abuse

Shout out to Ashton Kutcher, Beyonce and other celebs who are supporting National Human Trafficking Awareness Day.

Posted by: epjd | January 11, 2010 1:04 PM | Report abuse

Wee Tom is many things, but sexy so ain't one of 'em. Now as for real sexy short men, I nominate HGTV's Jamie Durie. Yum.

And the death knell tolls for Fergie and Josh Duhamel's marriage. That was predictable.

Derek Jeter, marrying? Why?

Posted by: Californian11 | January 11, 2010 1:11 PM | Report abuse

ep
Shout out to Ashton Kutcher, Beyonce and other celebs who are supporting National Human Trafficking Awareness Day.

Second that motion, ep.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | January 11, 2010 2:40 PM | Report abuse

Cali, I had EXACTLY the same thought about Jeter--I mean, how many times during this Tiger Woods sleazefest have we heard that if he'd just done a Jeter (ie, stay single and have sex with every Jane, Josie and Beth he meets) no one would care--so what, he's a player, etc etc.

I hate to admit it, but Ashton Kutcher has kind of grown on me. Snuck up on me, but there it is.

Posted by: sorcerers_cat | January 11, 2010 4:54 PM | Report abuse

cat, I know what you mean re Ashton. Maybe there really IS a little "there" there after all. Certainly some of his best work has a certain meta quality about it.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | January 11, 2010 5:52 PM | Report abuse

Ouch. Sorry 'bout that "Certainly... certain" construction. Need to preview before posting.

Posted by: Nosy_Parker | January 11, 2010 5:53 PM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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