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Posted at 2:17 PM ET, 04/ 9/2010

Robert Pattinson + Kurt Cobain = Internet panic

By Jen Chaney

Hey. Wait. We've got a new complaint.

As mentioned in this morning's mix, rumors are circulating that Robert Pattinson *may* play Kurt Cobain in a Nirvana biopic. (According to the item, first reported in the Sun, Scarlett Johansson may play Courtney Love. Somehow, though, that equally ri-donk-ulous casting concept has been overshadowed by the notion of R. Patz smelling like teen spirit.)


Here I am now. Do I entertain you? (AP)

An item on Spin's Web site emphasizes that Pattinson is in no way confirmed to play Cobain, who died 16 years ago yesterday. Courtney Love's manager, Jonathan Daniel, tells Spin he hasn't heard anything about Pattinson taking on the role until now, and that the working title for a Cobain movie is actually "Heavier Than Heaven," not "All Apologies," as the Sun reported.

In other words, the deal is not done. But that hasn't stopped people from Tweet-testing -- that's protesting, via Twitter -- and voicing their outrage. Perhaps the most frequently Retweeted sentiment is that putting Pattinson in the role of Cobain is akin to casting Justin Bieber as John Lennon. (That might be taking it a little too far, people. At least they didn't try to cast Taylor Lautner in the role. Although it's not too late to consider him for the role of Dave Grohl...)

In case Love and co. are listening, here are three other Cobain possibilities to consider.

Jared Leto: I mean, look at the guy. He's already halfway there.

Dominic Monaghan. Hey, he does have some experience playing heroin-addicted rockers, thanks to "Lost."

The "I'm Not There" Approach: Colleague and Click Track blogger David Malitz brilliantly suggested they go the Bob Dylan biopic route. And that means multiple Cobains in the same film, with all concerns about age, gender and ethnicity flying out the window. Johnny Depp could be Kurt. Gael Garcia Bernal could be Kurt. Dakota Fanning could be Kurt. And they could even throw in Pattinson without causing quite as many conniption fits.

Feeling any of these? Or just want the revered Cobain to rest in peace?

By Jen Chaney  | April 9, 2010; 2:17 PM ET
Categories:  Movies, Pop Culture  
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Comments

Frankly, Mr. Cobain's life wasn't all that remarkable. It's just sad that he died young, right after he'd hit gold with a great new sound and look everyone loved. I'd actually prefer to hear more about his unfortunate daughter's wacky and tumultuous lifestory....

Posted by: undercover_hon | April 9, 2010 3:40 PM | Report abuse

I have no idea who any of these people are. Except Pattinson and John Lennon. And that disturbs me on so many levels.

-Snarky Squirrel

Posted by: 7900rmc | April 9, 2010 3:46 PM | Report abuse

I'm not feeling the Dominic Monaghan suggestion. Even when he's playing cracked-out, or evil, I still see a hobbit. The "I'm Not There" approach would be interesting, if you could get enough great actors to sign on.

Posted by: northgs | April 9, 2010 3:47 PM | Report abuse

Two words, my friends: Emile Hirsch

Posted by: HildaB | April 9, 2010 3:54 PM | Report abuse

Actually, ScarJo isn't such a stretch, except that she's too voluptuous (no, I mean that in a good way), and would have to do a DeNiro/Zellweger-level weight transformation to pull it off. Chloe Sevigny is probably too old to do early/mid-'90s Courtney, which is a shame.

Posted by: Janine1 | April 9, 2010 3:56 PM | Report abuse

Ooh, I second Emile Hirsch. Good call!

Posted by: Janine1 | April 9, 2010 3:59 PM | Report abuse

Have Spencer Pratt play Cobain. And make sure the gun is loaded.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | April 9, 2010 4:02 PM | Report abuse

I like sasquatch's the best but would also nominate Ryan Gosling, if for no other reason than I have the hots for him (and wouldn't he and ScarJo make a great screen couple?).

Posted by: kvs09 | April 9, 2010 4:24 PM | Report abuse

she's just never going to stop squeezing blood from his corpse is she...

Posted by: quintiliusvarus | April 9, 2010 4:49 PM | Report abuse

she's just never going to stop squeezing blood from his corpse is she...

Posted by: quintiliusvarus

****

That's what happens when you choose the lowest-price embalmer.

Posted by: byoolin1 | April 9, 2010 4:56 PM | Report abuse

Balm-Mart

Always the low price.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | April 9, 2010 5:05 PM | Report abuse

That's what happens when you choose the lowest-price embalmer.

Posted by: byoolin1

***

Or a low class, junkie hoowuh for a wife.

Posted by: BurgundyNGold | April 9, 2010 5:07 PM | Report abuse

Why not the lovely Scarlett and her actual husband Ryan Reynolds, who could actually look like Cobain.

Posted by: justmike | April 9, 2010 7:50 PM | Report abuse

I say Daniel Day Lewis, but w/ CGI to make him look younger, like they did to Brad Pitt in Benjamin Button.

Posted by: billyblizzard | April 9, 2010 10:37 PM | Report abuse

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Posted by: 898551828 | April 9, 2010 11:03 PM | Report abuse

Anyone remember being shocked by how much Ewan McG looked like Cobain at the end of "Velvet Goldmine"?

I'd go with the "I'm Not There" angle.

Posted by: Fruitfly1 | April 10, 2010 9:53 AM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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