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Posted at 2:13 PM ET, 06/ 3/2010

Predicting the MTV Movie Award winners

By Jen Chaney

The couple to beat in the Best Kiss category: Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson. (Summit Entertainment)

The MTV Movie Awards -- or as I like to call them, the Oscars for Hot Topic Shoppers -- are this Sunday night, which means that film lovers everywhere are currently agonizing over their predictions in the hopes of winning big in their office MTV Movie Award pools.

Wait, they aren't? Okay, fine, so the MTV Movie Awards are actually nothing more than a silly summertime diversion that gives studios the opportunity to push their latest projects directly in front of the faces of anyone who falls into their hip, young target demographic. Still, give some credit to MTV for doling out high honors in categories most trophy shows don't dare to touch; I mean, would the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences ever have the guts to poll its members in such categories as Best Kiss or, as the Movie Awards did in 2007, the Best Summer Movie You Haven't Seen Yet? Of course not. Wusses.

And that's why here in Celebritology, where even the patently ridiculous can be taken semi-seriously, I will attempt to predict the winners in six out of the dozen key MTV Movie Award categories.

Before I start, you might be wondering: how are the MTV Movie Award winners chosen? There is an online voting component -- that's right, America, you have a say! -- but it's unclear whether the victors are determined solely by the viewers. On the voting page for the Movie Awards, it says, "Vote now for your favorites nominees to help determine who should go home with the coveted Golden Popcorn." Key words there: help determine. I contacted reps at MTV to get clarification on the process, but have not received a response yet. All I know is that I hope Kurt Loder is somehow involved in the final decision-making. Because if he isn't, this entire thing is a sham. UPDATE: An MTV rep just contacted me and confirmed that the winners are determined solely by online voting. So, while Loder may not be involved, I take heart in knowing that MTV is practicing Web-related democracy.

Now on to the predictions.

Best Kiss: This isn't even a fair fight. I mean, I suppose there's an off chance that Taylors Swift and Lautner could win for their lip-locking in "Valentine's Day." But odds are that last year's winners -- Kristen Stewart and Robert Pattinson -- will once again score the trophy in this category, this time for their kiss in "Twilight: New Moon." Is anyone else in the field even beginning to approach their level of excellence in the field of face-sucking? Answer: no.

Best Villain: Ken Jeong's naked mad man in "The Hangover" could be a dark horse here. But I think this is one category where MTV viewers (and whoever else makes the call) will agree with Oscar voters and choose Christoph Waltz in "Inglourious Basterds."

Best WTF Moment: You have to love an award that exists primarily for the purpose of using text-message style lingo. (LOL must be super-ticked that it didn't get its own category.) The winner here, even if her joke about Sandra Bullock's flat-chestedness isn't particularly WTF-ish, has to be Betty White. Why? Um, she's Betty White? And she's beloved by all?

Best Male Performance: Like so many things in life, this award comes down to a question of Team Edward vs. Team Jacob. And with Pattinson potentially getting recognition in other categories, I think this Golden Popcorn statuette will wind up in the hands of everyone's favorite pumped-up werewolf, Taylor Lautner.

Best Female Performance: Since Sandra Bullock will receive the Generation Award at Sunday's ceremony -- which will mark the actress's first high-profile public appearance since the dissolution of her marriage to Jesse James -- MTV would look kind of silly not recognizing her Academy Award-winning performance in "The Blind Side." I say Sandy wins again.

Best Movie: The Academy Awards recognized 10 nominees for Best Picture this year. But MTV not only keeps it simple with just five contenders, it also has boldly chosen to recognize only one of those Oscar-approved films: "Avatar." The other four contenders are: "Alice in Wonderland," "Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince," "The Hangover" and "The Twilight Saga: New Moon." And, well, it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure out which flick will be named MTV's best picture. Bella, Edward, Jacob: We're lookin' at you, kids.

Do these predictions sound right? Or do you foresee some surprise winners come Sunday night? Share your Movie Award forecasts in the comments below.

By Jen Chaney  | June 3, 2010; 2:13 PM ET
Categories:  Movies, Pop Culture  | Tags:  Award Shows, Movies  
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Wait, what- no mention of the best promo for this year's MTV Movie Awards?! It has to be one of the funniest ever produced...and should spawn a movie, with cameos-galore:

Posted by: VaTechMAN | June 3, 2010 3:35 PM | Report abuse

You forgot the Global Superstar catagory which I hope Rob wins. Who do you think will take it?

Posted by: bettyel | June 3, 2010 7:04 PM | Report abuse

Hmmm, looks like the C2.0 group skews too old to give a *** for MTV and its movie awards.

Posted by: kbockl | June 3, 2010 10:00 PM | Report abuse

I'm afraid kbockl is correct, I haven't watched the MTV Awards for quite a while.

Though I do enjoy their categories, much more fun that those stuffy Oscars.

I'll just catch the highlights on youtube.

Posted by: wadejg | June 4, 2010 9:31 AM | Report abuse

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