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Posted at 2:05 PM ET, 07/ 1/2010

Recasting 'Clue'

By Paul Williams

Posted by Paul Williams

In this summer of '80s revivalism (see "Kid, Karate" and "Team, A"), there's an overlooked gem from that decade that is getting its own makeover soon.

"Clue."

That's right, "Clue," possibly the best movie ever based on a board game, featuring a cameo by a Go-Go.

I'm not suggesting "Clue" is high art, but it is fun, silly and rewatchable. Its cast of comic actors toss off rapid-fire jokes with superb, professional timing.

Director Gore Verbinski ("The Ring," "Pirates of the Caribbean") has signed on for a remake, set to come out in 2011. Knowing how Hollywood works, I'll be glad if it doesn't end up being a "Saw"-style slasher film, starring Miley Cyrus as Col. Mustard.

Still, I'd like to offer some casting suggestions, Mr. Verbinski.

Wadsworth
Original: Tim Curry
New: Michael Sheen
Why: Because Michael Sheen was born to play a comedic British butler at some point in his life.

Mrs. Peacock.
Original: Eileen Brennan
New: Lauren Graham
Why: Graham is perhaps a little young for the part, but she showed on "Gilmore Girls" that she can do the nervous, fast-talking, charmingly goofy thing as well as any actress.

Mrs. White
Original: Madeline Kahn
New: Portia de Rossi
Why: The frequently widowed Mrs. White would be ably played by de Rossi, who has made a very funny career out of portraying self-involved maneaters.

Prof. Plum
Original: Christopher Lloyd
New: Sam Rockwell
Why: Because Plum is a slimy psychologist who sleeps with his patients. And no one does slimy like Sam Rockwell.

Mr. Green
Original: Michael McKean
New: Jason Bateman
Why: Because pairing him with de Rossi might be as close to an "Arrested Development" movie as we get any time soon.

Miss Scarlet
Original: Leslie Ann Warren
New: Maggie Gyllenhaal
Why: She would nail the wry one-liners of the jaded madam.

Col. Mustard
Original: Martin Mull
New: Thomas Lennon
Why: Besides the fact that Lennon ("Reno 911") is hilarious, just look -- Mull | Lennon

What do you think? Leave your suggestions for the above (as well as Mr. Boddy and Yvette) in the comments below.

Paul Williams is a producer for The Washington Post. He is available to play the part of "The Motorist."

By Paul Williams  | July 1, 2010; 2:05 PM ET
Categories:  Movies, Pop Culture  
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Comments

Noooooooooooooooo! Not a recast/remake of one of the best 80s movies of all time!

Well, granted, I think I was 5 when this came out. But still... Anyway, if I had to recast it, I would actually use Julianne Moore as the aging madam Miss Scarlet only because she was my favorite growing up (us redheads stick together) so they'd need a redhead to play her in the new movie.

Mr. Body - the guy who played Keamy on "Lost". He always plays skeezy characters and Mr. Body was definitely skeezy.

Yvette - Scarlett Johannsen. Probably too big of a name for such a small part but you'd need someone voluptuous and sexy for the part of the ill-fated maid.

Posted by: melindaboyd | July 1, 2010 1:45 PM | Report abuse

That's not Col. Mustard....it's Gene Parmesan!!!!

Posted by: opTed | July 1, 2010 2:33 PM | Report abuse

I would hate a Clue Remake. I LOVE THE ORIGINAL. But if it had to happen this is the cast I would want:

Wadsworth - Michael Emerson (from Lost)

Mrs. Peacock - Anna Faris (She is the most underrated comedian)

Mrs. white - Viola Davis

Prof Plum - Clive Owen

Mr. Green - Jason Bateman!

Miss Scarlet - Lauren Ambrose

Posted by: honeylamb | July 1, 2010 2:52 PM | Report abuse

I hate the idea of a remake SO MUCH, that flames, FLAMES, on the side of my face, heaving breaths.....

Posted by: sjcpeach | July 1, 2010 2:54 PM | Report abuse

Nice recasting there Producer Paul, however, I'm thinking that Ms. Scarlett could be played by Christina Hendriks and maybe get Scarlett Johanson to play Yvette the maid.

Especially if they decide to keep the original wardrobes:

http://www.gossipsauce.com/files/gs_clue_movie_090226_m.jpg

Posted by: DorkusMaximus1 | July 1, 2010 3:09 PM | Report abuse

Sigh. I'm so old. I recognized a couple of the names of the proposed remake cast members but wouldn't know them if I ran them down with the car... Now I get an idea how my parents felt during the late '60s. Sigh.

Posted by: chorister | July 1, 2010 3:39 PM | Report abuse

Here's an original idea.... have Tim Curry play the part of Wadsworth...

Posted by: dcraven925 | July 1, 2010 3:54 PM | Report abuse

None of the suggested replacements come close to the calibre of the originals, with the possible exception of Michael Sheen as the butler.

As for the idea of Maggie Gyllenhaal as the slinky Miss Scarlett -- as they say, EPIC FAIL, Producer Paul.

The problem with many of the casting ideas bandied about is that the actors being suggested seem too young for the parts. The whole point of the plot was that these characters have pasts -- it's ridiculous for them to be played by 20-somethings or early 30-somethings. Except for Yvette, no one in the original cast was under 35 at the time. But I'm sure that's what Hollywood will do, and it will ruin it.

So, in that spirit, here's a studio bigwig's dream cast, with no regard for actual verisimilitude/acting ability (you know, just the way they actually cast movies!):

Wadsworth: Michael Sheen (because he's got buzz, even if the target teenage audience doesn't quite know who he is)
Miss Scarlett: Kristen Stewart
Mrs. White: Megan Fox
Mrs. Peacock: Jennifer Aniston
Prof. Plum: Seth Rogan
Mr. Green: the guy who plays Sheldon on Big Bang Theory
Col. Mustard: Taylor Lautner/Robert Pattinson (they're basically interchangeable anyway, right?)
Messenger Girl/Boy: Justin Bieber
Cop: David Caruso (come on, you know it'd be hysterical!)
The Proselytizer/G-Man (Howard Hesseman's character): Tom Cruise
Motorist: Steve Carell

-Snarky Squirrel, who gave this way too much thought when she should be working on her dissertation.

Posted by: 7900rmc | July 1, 2010 4:05 PM | Report abuse

Okay -so the one flaw in all of this is...are they remaking it with sort of the same script, or are they going to rewrite it? Cause all those characters were made up i.e., had nothing really necessarily to do with the board game. There's no real information about the characters in the board game, right? So it doesn't necessarily have to match the original movie?
That having been said, Paul, I do think you done good.

Posted by: atlmom1234 | July 1, 2010 4:15 PM | Report abuse

Sorry Producer Paul, I have to say I disagree with many of your choices. But, Clue is in my top 3 movies of all time, so I'm very wary of a recast in general...

Lauren Graham? I love her, a lot, but she is no Mrs. Peacock. Mrs. Peacock needs some years on her.

I really like the idea of Michael Emerson, but maybe as Mr. Body, not Wadsworth.

I also like Christina Hendricks for Mrs. Scarlett. I've also thought Susan Sarandon could work.

I do think Portia de Rossi is a particularly inspired choice for Mrs. White!

Posted by: AmberGale | July 1, 2010 4:28 PM | Report abuse

I am certain there is a role for Russell Brand in a Clue re-make and in every movie made henceforth. Unless it already has Johnny Depp in it, in which case that combination may just be too much for my . . . um. . . heart.

Posted by: kbockl | July 1, 2010 5:24 PM | Report abuse

7900rmc, surprisingly enough pretty much everyone Paul suggested is over 35. Jason Bateman, Sam Rockwell, and Martin Sheen are 41, Portia di Rossi is 37, Lauren Graham is 43, and Thomas Lennon is 39. Only Maggie Gyllenhaal comes in at a wee young 32.

But doesn't everyone seem to look so much younger these days?

(oh, and remaking Clue is indeed a horrible idea)

Posted by: sillyberry | July 2, 2010 2:22 AM | Report abuse

One time I watched Clue with 2 teenage girls who rewound the video cassette back to the scene of the clue every time someone in the film exposed a clue. So we rewound it at least 10 times and watched the movie for 10 straight hours.

Posted by: abcd51 | July 4, 2010 10:29 PM | Report abuse

I hate remakes. I love casting them, however.

And Michael Sheen is perfect for this.

And for anything, actually. I mean he plays Tony Blair and a Werewolf in the same year? C'mon, you gotta give it up!

Posted by: IAmATVJunkieDotCom | July 5, 2010 10:12 PM | Report abuse

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