'Bridalplasty': When reality TV hits rock bottom
For those who were struggling to determine exactly how low reality television can sink, I have "good" news. The answer has become clear and it can be summed up in one word: "Bridalplasty."
The Hollywood Reporter broke the news that E! is planning a new reality series called, yes, "Bridalplasty," in which blushing, nose-job-seeking brides-to-be compete in a series of wedding planning challenges. With each victory, they get to undergo the surgical procedure of their choice, all in an effort to look like the "perfect" bride just in time for the big wedding day, when they will reveal their new appearance to all the
rubber-necking horrified honored guests at their splashy nuptials.
The executive producer of the show will be Gloria Steinem.
(Wait a beat.)
Yes, of course, that was a joke!
Actually, it's Heidi Montag.
(Wait another beat.)
Nope, still a joke, although one that sounds remarkably plausible.
In all seriousness, E!'s Giuliana Rancic and the minds behind VH-1's "The Surreal Life" are the responsible parties here.
The concept is so incredibly offensive that I don't know where to begin. Should I start with the condescending notion that women -- who are, of course, catty, vapid creatures -- should use the planning of a wedding as an opportunity to compete with each other? Or that a wedding day is obviously the end-all, be-all of the entire female human experience on planet Earth?
Nah, I'll go for the obvious, most infuriating aspect of this: that the contestants will be treated to multiple surgeries in order to look their absolute best. For one thing, as we established with the whole Montag episode, multiple procedures are extreme and may not be the healthiest option for many people to pursue. For God's sake, even Montag wants some of her old body parts back. For another thing: Didn't any of these people pay attention during the Dove Campaign for Real Beauty?
Because this is just in the development stage, there's obviously a chance "Bridalplasty" won't come to pass, especially if no one signs up to compete. So, fame-craving ladies, it's up to you. Take a stand and don't subject yourselves to this kind of nonsense, no matter how much E! promises to pay you or how ubiquitous you think your face might become as a result of appearing on this show. Because by the time this thing is over, you won't even have the same face anyway.
Women, let's prove once and for all that life really isn't some weird cross between that crummy rom-com "Bride Wars" and "Nip/Tuck." Please?
| September 16, 2010; 11:34 AM ET
Categories: Pop Culture, TV
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