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Posted at 10:14 AM ET, 01/31/2011

Eva Longoria and Tony Parker officially divorced

By Liz Kelly

Eva Longoria and husband Tony Parker in September 2010. (Reuters)

Celebrity Beat: Eva Longoria and Tony Parker are officially divorced... Chris Brown completes domestic violence program... David Arquette checks out of rehab... Britney Spears walks down the aisle... as a bridesmaid... Justin Timberlake is 30... we know just what to get him.

Rumor Mill: Charlie Sheen expected to stay in rehab for the next three months. What will become of "Two and a Half Men?"... Happy Monday: Christian Slater is not dead.

By Liz Kelly  | January 31, 2011; 10:14 AM ET
Categories:  Daily Mix  
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Comments

Perhaps 2.5 Men can hire Emilio Estevez as Charlie and Alan's long lost brother.

Posted by: yellojkt | January 31, 2011 11:05 AM | Report abuse

Did the domestic violence program that Chris Brown completed offer advanced degrees? I can hear Chris sing it now: "I got a Ph.D., Doctor o' domestic violence."

If a tree falls in the forest on top of Christian Slater, does anyone care?

And if anyone ever questions the limitations of digital photography, this should clinch the case:
http://img2.timeinc.net/people/i/2011/startracks/110214/britney-spears-320.jpg

Britney want brains!!!

Eva Longoria is now back on the market. However, the buyer of this brick house must bring at least $5.7 million to closing.

Posted by: sasquatchbigfoot | January 31, 2011 11:29 AM | Report abuse

"Britney Spears walks down the aisle... as a bridesmaid" -- Always a bride, never (until now) a bridesmaid.

"David Arquette checks out of rehab" -- Hey Charlie Sheen! Quick, grab the room before Lohan gets back!

"Justin Timberlake is 30" -- Whatevs. To me he's still that curly blond teen in 'N Sync with limited talent.

"Christian Slater is not dead" -- That's just the tagline for his new movie, "Pump Up the Bullets."

"What will become of 'Two and a Half Men'?" -- I have a few ideas, involving footage of the show and a blender. It's the erasing-any-memories part that I'm having trouble working out.

Posted by: td_in_baltimore | January 31, 2011 11:51 AM | Report abuse

Can I use the opening lines of the Morning Mix in advertising material for my law firm?

Posted by: epjd | January 31, 2011 1:11 PM | Report abuse

The comments to this entry are closed.

 
 
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