The Morning Line: Today's Featured Cartoons, in Six Minutes or Less
During this busy holiday season, when your schedule is packed tighter than a turducken, 'Riffs offers a reader service: Here are your Six-Minute Comics (less if you speed-read), to save you valuable time. Happy holidays, Cartoon Nation.
MC HAMMER'S ENTIRE LIFE-STORY TOLD IN FOUR PANELS
For brevity and wit, VH1's "Behind the Music" has nothing on Darrin Bell. All Clyde is missing is the fash-crime parachute pants instead of the "Thug 4 Life" shirt. "Plasma TVs for all my dogs." Perfect. "Candorville" nails it.
WHATEVER KILLS YOU DOESN'T MAKE YOU STRONGER
The best insect gag since, oh, we read today's "Pearls Before Swine" about two minutes earlier. This is "Pooch Cafe" at it best -- in this case, rivaling even the classic "Bloom County" in which the would-be omnipotent cockroach can survive a nuclear blast, but not a properly placed heel. As Skipper would say to the OTHER Gilligan: "Good job, lil' buddy!"
TIGHT-LIPPED TRAIL COMMUNICATES
TELEPATHICALLY WITH ASSAILANT
Our Man in Khaki may have been able to charm the pants off -- or actually, ONTO -- "Split-Agenda" Sue in "Mark Trail," but the wascally Rabbit is another matter. Then again, tough to trust any grown man named "Rabbit" unless he can run a "4.3" time in the 40. No sir, I don't like the looks of this fella -- which is why I can only hope Andy will hunt him down and make Rabbit Stew outta him.
DUSTY GAG EVEN PREDATES
SCIENCE OF CARBON-DATING
This joke is SO old...that I wrote it nearly a decade ago, when pert near every other American kid was gaining access to a PC. I like to think I crafted it better, but perhaps not.
Which of today's comics made your headlines? If you've got a comment, various endangered species (nuclear cockroaches...parachute-panted rappers...print political cartoonists) are standing by...
| November 28, 2008; 6:00 AM ET
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Posted by: larrybush | November 28, 2008 10:35 PM | Report abuse
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