Holiday Quickies: 'Family Circus' Gets Its Male Mojo A-Workin'
Before the barbecue and ballgames, a rapid holiday roundup for those on the go:
FAMILY CIRCUS: This -- THIS! -- is when it's a crime that "Family Circus" is only a single panel. The Lamp Lady has her left arm on Bill's shoulder....her lips are parted just so...she's up on her toes, as if to hug or smooch Billy-Boy...all while his five-dollar bill hangs limply between them....and....annnnd!...
And Cartoonus Interruptus. Please, O Keane clan -- deliver us a second panel. We'll wait.
CANDORVILLE: Darrin Bell again spoofs the newspaper industry deftly. And we must note the key difference between a "Candorville" workplace and a "Dilbert" office. In "Candorville," the Boss Man tells Lemont that the huge wheel generates electricity. In "Dilbert's" cubeville, the Pointy-Haired Boss would simply try to dupe his workers into believing that the huge basement wheel, built out of altruistic and humane concern, was an immense company GYM.
GET FUZZY: Wait -- WHAT? Rob the Apparent Agoraphobe is about to actually...leave his apartment?! Wake the kids, call the neighbors -- and look forward to tomorrow's action with breath bated, even. Even Bill Murray's "What About Bob?" character would be on empathetic pins-n-needles.
JUDGE PARKER: You don't think cheerleader moms play rough? Then just Google "cheerleader moms" and see what pops up. Yep -- from bullying to battery to stolen identities, seems every third item is a CRIME BRIEF. There may be no "I" in team, but there certainly is in "incarceration."
AMAZING SPIDER-MAN: [Standing, fist raised skyward:] "Nooooooo!!!!"
This cannot be. All this was just a cheesy dream sequence a la "Wizard of Oz" (if not "Newhart")??
If you'll recall, STAN LEE told Comic Riffs several months ago that he had a pretty good idea how he'd get Spidey back to conjugal present-day. So speaking of flashbacks: Let's rewind the interview tape, please:
MC: Have you already determined how the storyline would switch back?
SL: I've thought of a good way to get him back to normal.
MC:Can you tell us, or at least give us a hint?
SL: They'd have to shoot me at the syndicate if I said anything.
So now, not only are we jerked back into the present with a dream, but now we also have to wonder whether time will shift again when...Wolverine shows up??
Can NO one but Hugh Jackman rescue us from the "Through the Looking Glass" dreamscape?!
The Reliable Source
| May 25, 2009; 11:30 AM ET
Categories: The Morning Line
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