Morning Quickie: Root for 'Get Fuzzy' to Hit the Bricks

THE MORNING LINE:
The a.m. roundup from today's pages...

INSIDE JOB: What's this now? Rob the Quasi-Agoraphobe is once again actually contemplating...leaving the homestead? If Rhode Island is what it takes, then -- a-men, brother -- Providence is finally here. By my extremely unofficial count, it's been -- oh -- some 242 days since Mr. Wilco left the casa. In other words: Nearly long enough for Ted Koppel to begin counting the days as part of a national vigil. Whaddya say, Darb: "Free Wilco!" (Cue stirring Peter Gabriel or Dylanesque protest song here.)

MENACING MASTHEADS: Oh, by what mischievous manner will pseudo-lovable scamp Dennis bedevil us today? Locusts? Pestilence? Brainwashing Joey to waterboard Margaret in the spirit of fun-filled high jinks? No, today, the original red menace vexes us with nonsensical letters on the covers of his fine literature. Except we're convinced those nefarious letters mean something, slyly planted by the post-Ketcham cabal. Are you signaling someone with these seemingly harmless hieroglyphics, D? Please -- let us in on the real joke here,

TRAIL MIX: Mark has bodyblocked Central Casting Villains halfway into tomorrow. He's navigated all manner of Freakishly Ginormous Foregrounded Woodland Creature. And perhaps most breathtakingly, he's maintained a chaste relationship with Cherry Trail for many moons now. Surely a little chemical case is no match for our man Mark! It's only a matter of who, eventually, will he get to smack upside the Inaccurately Rendered head.

NO HUEVOS FOR BREAKFAST: Watch, kids! See Spidey become utterly emasculated by Wolfie! By week's end, he may be reduced to spinning lace doilies for his tea circle. (Side question: Does Peter Parker even have body hair, or will he forever look like a boy-bander?) "Amazing," indeed.