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Posted at 8:45 AM ET, 07/ 6/2009

The Naked Truth: Boy, We Can See What's Left Behind

By Michael Cavna

The quickie roundup of today's toons, from the naked and the damned....

'JUDGE PARKER' (NAS)Enlarge Image

POMPOM AND CIRCUMSTANCE: At last, Sophie is validated, the Evil Cheerleaders From Dante's Ninth Circle are vanquished and the new social order of the high school can be heralded like some grand "Heathers" meets "Mean Girls" with a skosh of "High School Musical" epic. Can we end the Queen Bee drama now? Please? Unless, of course, Sophie now wants to take on "Luann's" clique in a knockdown dragout, which I'd pay-per-view to see. ("Molly Ringwald called, Tiffany. She wants her clothes back.")

'NON SEQUITUR' (UPS)Enlarge Image

A REAL BUTTINSKY: Time was, you only found dorsal nudity on the funnypages when the strip involved a Mischievous Lovable Scamp Up to His Usual High Jinks. Blame it on the Post-Dennis Franz Era (aka the Gratuitous PDF Period), but now we must endure derrière-baring gnomes (see: yesterday's "Frazz") and today's Lawnmower Man with the "rear bags" attachment. At least "Beetle Bailey" keeps their pants on and only talks about their bodice-baring daydreams, haha.

'SPIDER-MAN' (KFS)Enlarge Image

BECAUSE HUGH JACKMAN CAN'T ALWAYS DO BROADWAY: First off, mighty curious to note that while Wolverine has been around since more Gothic times, his preferred patter is stuck in the hardboiled film-noir years, when "that Parker dame" would predate even the birth of Spidey. Regardless, though, with all this talk of Peter Parker hitting the Great White Way for reals next year, the Official 'Riffs Question of the Day is: Who should play Spidey on Broadway? Your casting picks are invited.

Any strips you particularly cheer or jeer today? If so, then share them links.

By Michael Cavna  | July 6, 2009; 8:45 AM ET
Categories:  The Charts  
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I already have my tickets to the Spider Man Broadway show. The have cast Evan Rachel Wood and MJ and Alan Cumming as the Green Goblin. Since they haven't announced Spidey/Parker, I'm guessing he will be some unknown Cirque De Soliel type.

Posted by: yellojkt | July 6, 2009 9:41 AM | Report abuse

Er, Mary Jane will be played by Evan Rachel Wood. One rumor had Jim Sturgis of The Office as Peter Parker, but I don't know if he can take that much time off. Most Broadway shows demand a six month contract.

Posted by: yellojkt | July 6, 2009 9:46 AM | Report abuse

Sort of on-topic, I don't think we can jettison this story line in JP until we, uh, get to the bottom of Godiva Danube.

So to speak...

Posted by: JkR- | July 6, 2009 11:53 AM | Report abuse

How long,oh Lord, is the Mark Trail story line going to continue? This is why I don't watch soaps on TV. Find out who is dumping the waste barrels and get on, even the FBI is quicker than this!

Posted by: 2old2readcomics | July 6, 2009 1:18 PM | Report abuse

Hawthorne's derriere has appeared in Sherman dozens of times over the past few years...and it's quite a delectable little tush, as well.

Posted by: pltrgyst | July 6, 2009 5:18 PM | Report abuse

C'mon, I can see the Judge Parker story line coming from a mile away: Sophie will be the Corpse and Mary will be the Prime Suspect. The only suspense is why the strip doesn't go away.

Posted by: drazen1 | July 7, 2009 9:19 AM | Report abuse

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