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BritNews RoundUp: I Can See Cleanly Now

Does your husband slink away when it's time clean the toilet or vacuum the living room? Is he curiously absent when the dishwasher needs loading or the laundry needs sorting? Maybe all he needs is to have a part of his anatomy surgically removed.

I'm talking about his corneas, folks. According to the Daily Mail, Will Palmer of Doncaster never cared much for housework, then he had a cornea transplant and now he can't stop himself from tidying up. "Before my vision started to deteriorate my partner had to pester me into doing my bit. But now I'm always at it," he said.

Palmer is convinced his donor corneas must have come from a woman. "There's a reason why men don't clean like this and I think it's because we just don't see the dirt, but I see it everywhere I go."

Scientifically plausible? Of course not. And get this: Because the donor was anonymous, Palmer has no idea whether his new eye bits came from a man or a woman.

The recession may have hit the City--that's London's financial center--but that doesn't mean there aren't any people willing to spend ridiculous amounts of money on ridiculous things. Things like nyotaimori. That's the Japanese practice of eating sushi off the naked bodies of beautiful women. The Telegraph says Nigel Carlos and his partner Nick Hepburn identified a need in the market for it. The cost for a 10-course meal is 250 pounds (about $414). According to the Telegraph, Carlos "assured potential clients the experience would be a classy one." Of course.

It wouldn't be the BritNews RoundUp if we didn't have the latest news from the animal front. Scientists outside of Liverpool have fitted a herd of 200 dairy cows with special microphone-equipped collars. Why? To record the cows as they pass gas.

According to the Sun: "Methane emissions from both ends of cows are to blame for three-quarters of the damaging carbon footprint of milk production, with burping releasing more gas than parping."

Parping? That's a new one.

Researchers are feeding the cows different things and seeing how they, um, react. I'm thinking beans are right out.

Remember that Disney movie about the fish who was lost and had to find his way home? A similarly heartwarming story played out in Scotland recently. Jake Huey, a worker at a sewage treatment plant in Lanarkshire, noticed a goldfish flopping about on a mesh filter. He rescued it and nursed it back to health. The fish, now named Pooh, is being looked after until a suitable home can be found for it.

Said Huey: ''Obviously someone thought their pet was on its last legs and flushed it down the toilet, which obviously we wouldn't advise."

Finally, if you love photographs of animals with prosthetic limbs (and really, who doesn't?), this collection of pictures is for you.

Song of My Dreams
Speaking of England: When I was living in the U.K. last year I made a point of finding Ronnie Thomas. Who is he, you ask? He's a musician, a bass player who wrote a song called "Girl of My Dreams," which was released by a guy called Bram Tchaikovsky in 1979. Lovers of power pop music--chiming guitars, catchy hooks--recognize "Girl of My Dreams" as a modern classic. Here's my brief interview with Ronnie.

Talk to Me
If it's Friday it must be Chat Day. My guest today for my online discussion will be Rick Meehan. Rick's the mayor of Ocean City, Md., and I thought it'd be neat to hear what it's like to run a beach town. Post a question now or join me at noon.

By John Kelly  |  August 21, 2009; 9:30 AM ET
Categories:  BritNews RoundUp  
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Next: Photo Flashback: Brave New World Edition


Parping?? Is that even a word?

Posted by: Akinoluna | August 22, 2009 6:31 PM | Report abuse

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