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Mulligans: Liza Minnelli for Senate!

By Dana Milbank

The counting of write-in ballots in Alaska appears to be favoring Sen. Lisa Murkowski in her challenge to the Republican nominee, Joe Miller. But if Miller does prevail, after this he'll have a difficult time arguing against frivolous lawsuits. From his court filing attempting to get write-in votes thrown out if the voter misspelled Murkowski's name:

[A] write in vote for "Lisa" would not adequately identify any particular candidate. Moreover, write-in candidates include both Lisa Murkowski and Lisa M. Lackey; thus, a write-in vote for "Lisa M." would not adequately identify any particular candidate....

Poor handwriting can exacerbate these problems even more. If one could only make out "_____kowski" or just "___ski", there is no principled rule for discerning if the vote was intended for Daniel C. Piaskowski, Lee Hamerski, or Lisa Murkowski - all candidates. Sloppy handwriting could also cause "Tom M" to look like "Lisa M" or "Lyn Marcu" to look like "Lisa Murkoski." Both "Morawitz" or "Murray," if written poorly, could resemble "Murkowski". Moreover, a voter is not limited to writing only those names that appear on the list. A voter could write "Liza Minnelli" as easily as "Lisa Murkowski."....

Will a vote for "Murkowsky" be counted as a vote for write-in candidate Lisa Murkowski? What about a vote for "Murcowsky"? "Murrcowsky"? Or "Murrcousky"?

If Liza Minnelli wins, ComPost will be opening an Anchorage bureau.


Mulligans are handed out here every day; it's rare that somebody actually takes one. But congressman-elect Allen West of Florida is that rarity. He announced that radio host Joyce Kaufman, who has spoken on air about such things as hanging illegal immigrants, will not be coming to Washington as his chief of staff, after all.

Kaufman, on her radio show, said she was being subjected to "an electronic lynching by proxy."


This has nothing to do with politics, but we may never have the chance again to link to a story with the headline "Ill. Woman Aims to Assault Cop with Sex Toy at a Joe's Crab Shack, Say Police." The accused "allegedly walked out of a Joe's Crab Shack restaurant in Gurnee on Tuesday without paying the bill." Police "later found her at her home where she allegedly threatened to batter the officer with a 'rigid female pleasure device.'"

By Dana Milbank  | November 11, 2010; 8:57 PM ET
Categories:  Mulligans  
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This is terrible! Stop just reading the news. Help solving the crimes by studying criminal justice at

Posted by: ericshawn12 | November 12, 2010 2:08 AM | Report abuse

Great column, Dana. I'm tempted to forget about Alex and start circling YOUR house in my unmarked van.`

Liza Minnilli just hired winning Bush v. Gore attorney, Theodore Olson, to represent her in the Alaska vote count. Liza was certain to win, until the attorney for Lisa Minnilli filed his brief. Life IS a caberet, but what is is is still in litigation.

Everyone thinks that Adam West fired (electronically lynched by proxy) Joyce Kaufman because she might be "hanging Chad"-born immigrants and holding their bodies for ransom. But the real reason is that media giant, Comcast, forced West's hand when Kaufman "canceled her contract with Comcast after she was asked to 'press 1 for English' when calling the help line". Big corporations always get their way.

And take a good look at the photo of that Ill. dildo woman who got the crabs from Joe. If she wasn't ill, she'd look exactly like an older version of Alexandra Petri! Fess up Alex. You're using a photo from 30 years ago, aren't you?

Posted by: divtune | November 12, 2010 3:18 AM | Report abuse

[Editor's Note: What divtune meant to say at the end of the 2nd paragraph iz:]

Life IS a cabaret, old chum, but if iz is is is still in litigation.

[Divtune's Wife's Note: Ha`]

Posted by: divtune | November 13, 2010 3:52 AM | Report abuse

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