Nice

Naughty

You voted

You voted ironically

You are responsible for this song

You are responsible for this song

Really sorry about the oil spill.

Spills may or may not have occurred, but the bacteria have eaten it all and left the gulf in many ways cleaner than it was before. Besides, those pelicans had it coming.

Shot a film in Reno just to watch it jumpstart Reno's economy

Shot a man in Reno just to watch him die

You have made it your life's work to dispel the idea that health-care reform creates death panels

You got so excited by the prospect of death panels that you voted for health-care reform. Twice.

You are the kind of guy people bring home to their mothers.

You are the kind of guy people bring home to their cougars.

You are the world cup

You are a vuvuzela

Surprise party

Sex by Surprise party

Bailed out Julian Assange

Bailed out Julian Assange because you were confused about the meaning of the term "WikiLeaks" and thought bailing might help.

You are an iPhone

You are the iPhone guy. You went from being the beloved linchpin of a group of friends to the guy who says, "Hang on, I'll Google it" or, "Oh, I've got an app for that" or, "My phone says this bar is overrated." You treat the phone the way certain people treat their gifted children, taking it to restaurants and repeating everything it says in a voice full of awe and wonder.

I don't drink

I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I prefer a Dos Equis

Bristol Palin

Levi Johnston

You touch the lives of others

You touch the junk of others

You approve of President Obama

You approve of President Obama's Muslim faith

You made an "It Gets Better" video

You made an "It Gets Worse" video

You are Conan O'Brien

You are whatever happened to the Tonight Show this year

You invite your wife to watch you climb out of the mine

You invite your wife and mistress to watch you climb out of the mine

You are a gruntled employee

You are Steven Slater

You are this guy addressing Congress

You are this guy addressing Congress

Bear

Bear Sterns

Prince William

Prince Will I. Am

Hannah Montana

Miley Cyrus

Bush memoir mentioning things you would put in a jar under normal circumstances

Fetus in a jar

Chile saves miners

Polanski saves minors -- for later

Refute

Refudiate