ComPost: January 2, 2011 - January 8, 2011

More myths about the Civil War

The Post this weekend includes a list of five myths why the South seceded. I helped make the accompanying quiz. It is rife with legitimate facts! Here are a few more myths about the Civil War: Stonewall Jackson got the...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 7, 2011; 6:59 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (4)
Categories:  Petri, Top Lists  | Tags:  America, Civil War, mythbusters, the power of myth  
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Of course John Edwards isn't engaged to Rielle Hunter. I hope.

Of course John Edwards isn't engaged to Rielle Hunter! The thing that I miss most about the halcyon years before John Edwards burst onto the national scene was the ability to ignore headlines from the National Enquirer. It's a sad...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 7, 2011; 4:12 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (3)
Categories:  Epic Failures, Petri, Worst Things Ever  | Tags:  America, John Edwards, oops  
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Top ten reasons you can't avoid reading this top ten list

10. The form is like quicksand. Top ten lists are the 21st century's only true contribution to literary form. Unlike all other types of literature invented in recent centuries -- modernist novel? spoken-word poem? -- the top-ten list format is...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 7, 2011; 2:45 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (3)
Categories:  Only on the Internet, Petri, Top Lists  | Tags:  Cosmopolitan, awareness, lists, parody  
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Why the Constitution Congress read was just fine

Today the Congress reached a new three-fifths compromise: they only read three-fifths of the Constitution! Well, sort of. If you consider the Constitution to be the whole body of governing text that has accumulated and been discarded by the American...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 6, 2011; 4:38 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (20)
Categories:  Big Deals, Congress, Petri  | Tags:  Congress, Constitution, apologies  
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Why the new Starbucks logo frightens me

(AP Photo) There's a new Starbucks logo in town. Many have already pointed out that, at the rate the logo is evolving, it will soon be nothing but an extreme close-up of the mermaid's nose. (An amusing diagram illustrates this...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 6, 2011; 2:00 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (6)
Categories:  Petri, Seems Suspect  | Tags:  America, coffee, the power of myth  
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Let the men handle it! Ron Franklin, Antonin Scalia, and sweetcakes

Ron Franklin, the ESPN commentator who famously addressed Jeanne Edwards as "sweetcakes," (or "sweet baby," depending on your source) has been fired. (Image via ESPN) The exchange was an interesting one. Discussing politics -- the wife of announcer Rod...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 5, 2011; 5:15 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (14)
Categories:  Epic Failures, Petri, That's awkward  | Tags:  Sarah Palin, muffins, sex, supreme court  
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White House Press Sec. Robert Gibbs is retiring? Hire Ted Williams!

White House Press Secretary Robert Gibbs announced today that he is departing for the private sector. It's an understandable move. Probably his job as White House Press Secretary made it difficult for him to pursue his real passion: avoiding lengthy...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 5, 2011; 2:45 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (11)
Categories:  Bad Advice, Barack Obama, Petri  | Tags:  Classic DC, Ted Williams, law of the jungle, media  
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Five top tips for the new Congress

Welcome, new Congress! Congratulations on making it to this level. That took some real effort. While people like myself were playing Angry Birds, you were running around kissing babies, shaking hands, and making platforms, only occasionally getting flustered and shaking...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 5, 2011; 12:05 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (6)
Categories:  Big Deals, Congress, Petri  | Tags:  America, Congress, Constitution  
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Scalia: 'I don't even have to read the briefs, for Pete's sake'

I do not pretend that originalism is perfect.... We don't have the answer to everything, but by God we have an answer to a lot of stuff... especially the most controversial: whether the death penalty is unconstitutional, whether there's a...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 4, 2011; 6:33 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (9)
Categories:  Bad Advice, Petri, Seems Suspect  | Tags:  Constitution, reading, supreme court  
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Why a new edition of Huckleberry Finn is wrong to remove the N-word

A new edition of Huckleberry Finn is removing the N-word. This is wrong. The word is terrible. But it's a linchpin of this book. What makes The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn so radical is the fact that in a...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 4, 2011; 2:30 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (75)
Categories:  Epic Failures, Petri, Worst Things Ever  | Tags:  America, censorship, kids these days  
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Why the Craigslist Killer matters

Last night, a bewildering number of people tweeted about and tuned in to Lifetime's Craigslist Killer movie, which tells the story of murderous med school student Philip Markoff and Megan McAllister, his unsuspecting fiancee. Why was this story so gripping?...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 4, 2011; 11:55 AM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (2)
Categories:  Only on the Internet, Petri  | Tags:  online comments, scary, technology  
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Why did 4,000 dead birds drop from the sky in Arkansas?

In Arkansas on New Year's Eve, 4,000 blackbirds suddenly and mysteriously fell dead from the sky. There are so many great aspects to this story. There's the fact that they cited "a preliminary report conducted by the Arkansas Livestock and...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 3, 2011; 6:44 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (32)
Categories:  Petri, Top Lists, Worst Things Ever  | Tags:  Arkansas, oops, spooky  
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Wake-up call for iPhone users, after the alarm glitch

"To do each day two things one dislikes is a precept I have followed scrupulously," Somerset Maugham said. "Every day I have got up and I have gone to bed." Waking up is never easy. But with iPhone alarms...

By Alexandra Petri  | January 3, 2011; 12:11 PM ET  |  Permalink  |  Comments (4)
Categories:  Epic Failures, Petri  | Tags:  apologies, iphones, technology  
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