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Posted at 12:54 PM ET, 01/31/2011

What we really mean when we post on Facebook

By Alexandra Petri

Is Facebook to blame for our unhappiness?

Recently, reports have surfaced blaming the Social Network for making us feel, comparatively, sad and worthless. Slate calls it the "anti-social network." Seeing our friends' resolutely chipper status updates, Libby Copeland argues, chips away at our fragile self-worth and -- especially for women, who tend to post more personal updates about, say, fertility and romance and fertile romances -- bring us down. Nobody, they point out, is really that happy, and our efforts to live up to the facades of unceasing delight created on our friends' walls are always losing battles.

Of course!

I didn't need a study to tell me that nobody is as happy as he or she appears on Facebook. And there's a good reason for this disparity. If we posted what we really felt, everyone would flee from the network and (probably) never speak to each other again.

Need proof? Here's how your newsfeed would look if we actually said what we meant on Facebook.


(Images created using Fakebook Quotes app.)

By Alexandra Petri  | January 31, 2011; 12:54 PM ET
Categories:  Only on the Internet, Petri, That's awkward  | Tags:  Facebook, awareness, parody, reality  
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While this mostly rings true, the easy way to combat the phenomenon is to use the Facebook status for what it's best for: cracking jokes and posting silly one-liners. Those who use the site that way are the best FB users. I "hide" those who resort to "I had a great nap!"-style posts.

Posted by: cali_snowboarder | January 31, 2011 3:22 PM | Report abuse

At times .... it can seem that most FB 'users' "got rice puddin' between the ears". Still though, it didn't stop 'Chance', the gardener, aka Chauncey Gardiner, from reaching the corridors of power. : "Being There". (movie).

Posted by: deepthroat21 | January 31, 2011 3:41 PM | Report abuse

Isn't Facebook just a 21st century version of the xeroxed Christmas letter?

Posted by: Itzajob | January 31, 2011 6:47 PM | Report abuse

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