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Posted at 6:01 PM ET, 02/24/2011

Semen squirter spared more jail time

By Dan Morse

A Montgomery County man who squirted semen from a bottle onto at least two shoppers was placed on three years probation Thursday, avoiding a jail sentence for crimes that drew nationwide attention.

Montgomery County District Judge Stephen P. Johnson said his main goal was to make sure the defendant, Michael Edwards, never did anything like it again.

As a condition of Edwards's probation, he is to continue sessions with a psychologist. Johnson also imposed more than two years of what is known as "back up time," meaning if Edwards messes up he could get tossed into jail. "We will have an entirely different conversation," Johnson warned him from the bench.

In a brief interview after the hearing, Edwards apologized for the incidents.

"I'm ashamed," he said, standing next to his mother and longtime girlfriend. "It's a shameful act. It won't happen again."

Edwards originally was charged with five counts of second-degree assault for squirting semen onto five women. He spent 35 days in jail after he was arrested.

Police learned the identity of two of the victims -- one at a Giant grocery store and the other at a Michael's craft store.

The Michael's victim spoke at the sentencing. Edwards followed her closely around the store. "This was a traumatic event for me," she said.

Prosecutors agreed to drop the three other cases as part of a plea deal.

By Dan Morse  | February 24, 2011; 6:01 PM ET
Categories:  Dan Morse, From the Courthouse, Montgomery, Updates  
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Comments

Liberal judges are good for social issues but horrible for crime. This guy should be spending at least 2 years in jail for his crime(s).

Posted by: jab00 | February 24, 2011 6:34 PM | Report abuse

I'm sure slim will have a 100k a year job working Vince Gray's administration in no time.

Posted by: evolvedthinker | February 24, 2011 7:01 PM | Report abuse

I'm sure slim will have a 100k a year job working Vince Gray's administration in no time.

Posted by: evolvedthinker | February 24, 2011 7:03 PM | Report abuse

I'm sure slim will have a 100k a year job working Vince Gray's administration in no time.

Posted by: evolvedthinker | February 24, 2011 7:04 PM | Report abuse

I'm sure slim will have a 100k a year job working Vince Gray's administration in no time.

Posted by: evolvedthinker | February 24, 2011 7:05 PM | Report abuse

This guy got PROBATION? That's ridiculous. What he did was the equivalent of assault. And this guy has a girlfriend! What kind of woman would want to remain this pervert's girlfriend?

Posted by: CatLady5 | February 24, 2011 9:59 PM | Report abuse


At the very minimum I hope that the judge ordered mandatory STD/STI/HIV testing for this guy.

Posted by: SCOTTSCHMIDTT | February 24, 2011 10:53 PM | Report abuse

Memo to self: Carry economy-sized spray bottle of Lysol in purse along with capsicum spray.

Posted by: FedUpInMoCo | February 25, 2011 7:56 AM | Report abuse

I know it sounds like he got off light, but look at it slightly differently. Had he walked by and spit on these people or dumped a cup of water on them it would be the same. He has never been in trouble before so like 95% of other pffenders with the same set of circumstances he got probation. Now if it was found that he did it knowing he had some disease with the intent to spread it, thats a whole different story. And if he re-offends, then he will likely get the maximum allowed.

The rules for sentencing are not perfect, but they do keep things (for like offenses) similar. You would not want it all left up to the judges. You would not want someone who murdered to get probation or someone who didn't really hurt anyone from getting several years in jail just because the judge was more or less offended that average.

Posted by: schnauzer21 | February 25, 2011 8:37 AM | Report abuse


Haha... Michael Edwards, good luck finding a job! One google search and your resume will be tossed out in the trash.

You'll be lucky to make over $30k for the rest of your life.

Sucks to be you, you nasty scumbag.

Posted by: kenk33 | February 25, 2011 9:13 AM | Report abuse

I don't understand this. How can the judge be so sure he won't do this again? What a ridiculous sentence!

Posted by: meatkins | February 25, 2011 9:36 AM | Report abuse

WOW! probation for squirting semen on unsuspecting people as they walked thru the stores minding their business. What a slap on the wrist! I think this guy has a problem and he is just like any other sex offender walking the face of the earth, a menace to society. He should've been given time for this sex crime.

Posted by: bolo408 | February 25, 2011 10:23 AM | Report abuse

@schnauzer21
I agree and disagree. I agree with you because he did do 35 days in jail after he was arrested. So you have to factor that into his punishment. And 35 days in jail is a lot to most people. I couldnt handle 1. But I also disagree because walking by and spitting on someone is more impulsive than this. He filled up bottles with semen and went out with it looking for someone to spray it on. It was premeditated. I think the fact that he planned this dighusting crime is worth some time. At least he got the back up time so if he messes up again he'll go away. I just would have liked to see some more jail time. I dont know how much more. But more.

Posted by: blank08 | February 25, 2011 11:31 AM | Report abuse

No harm done - what's a little good, clean seamen, people use it everyday. It's not like it was battery acid.

Posted by: reesemichael | February 25, 2011 12:51 PM | Report abuse

No harm done - what's a little good, clean seamen, people use it everyday. It's not like it was battery acid.

Posted by: reesemichael | February 25, 2011 12:51 PM | Report abuse

No harm done - what's a little good, clean semen, people use it everyday. It's not like it was battery acid.

Posted by: reesemichael | February 25, 2011 12:52 PM | Report abuse

Haha... Michael Edwards, good luck finding a job! One google search and your resume will be tossed out in the trash.
--kenk33

# # #

Erm, except for the fact that there are thousands of other males named "Michael Edwards" out there whose names come up as well. Must be fun to be a "Michael Edwards," Googling your name and discovering this deviant shares your online "namespace."

That's why I'm naming my son Nimrod Azazel Fullerite Johansen IV. He won't be no freakin' sex offender, neither.

Posted by: FedUpInMoCo | February 25, 2011 3:07 PM | Report abuse


The article doesn't say whether he's been registered as a sex offender.

Posted by: kenk33 | February 25, 2011 3:53 PM | Report abuse

What is wrong with that Judge?! The guy planned the attacks -- the gross and disgusting vermin. 35 days isn’t enough time for what he has done. I’m sure those women are still taking long showers because of him, to wash away the memory of his filth! My heart breaks for them. :o(

Posted by: ThinkWarm | February 25, 2011 4:03 PM | Report abuse

What is wrong with that Judge?! The guy planned the attacks -- the gross and disgusting vermin. 35 days isn’t enough time for what he has done. I’m sure those women are still taking long showers because of him, to wash away the memory of his filth! My heart breaks for them. :o(

Posted by: ThinkWarm | February 25, 2011 4:04 PM | Report abuse

i guess you all don't know there are people that have literally knock people upside their heads that are on probation too. People that have literally roobed and stole. this guy is beyond a jerk and needs a good old fashioned butt kicking, but i can easily see a judge not putting him in jail.

Posted by: simplewords999 | February 25, 2011 5:44 PM | Report abuse

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